Chapter 4: Are You There God? It's Me, Castiel

Why Dean Winchester believed he did not deserve to be saved was beyond Castiel. His soul shone brighter as they talked, and Castiel couldn't believe that just some days before, the breathing body before him had been nothing. Had been rotting. And it now shone, breathed, was alive. Was human.

Castiel went back to heaven after the talk. He figured Dean would need some time to adjust to the news he had been saved by an angel. That he had been saved by something he did not believe was real. He had to adjust.

Actually, they both had to.

After all, until a few days ago, Castiel did not believe Dean from the books was real either. He smiled. Maybe he should tune in and see what Jane and Claire were doing.

To his luck, a new book by Carver Edlund had just come out and Castiel yearned to read it along the girls. He grabbed one from a bookstore, sat at his favorite chair and read it. Of course he would give it back! He was just borrowing it.

"Again with those books?" Uriel asked from the door frame.

"Again with the questions?" Castiel replied, not lifting his eyes from the book on his lap.

Uriel smirked. "Did you talk to Dean?"

"I did." Castiel turned a page.

"Did you tell him his job?"

Castiel sighed. "Not yet. He's not ready."

Uriel laughed. "Ready?"

"He was shocked when he met me. I figured I would give him time."

"To not hurt his feelings? Oh, Castiel. I'm telling you."

"I know. Humanity will be my downfall. I get it. Can I read?" Uriel rolled his eyes in response.

Castiel knew Dean's job was to prevent Lilith from breaking the 66 seals to prevent the apocalypse and he also knew there was something Uriel wasn't telling him. Something he would find out later on, probably. He just kept learning the Winchester's lives through the pages of a book. Getting to know them better.

"The witnesses have risen." Balthazar announced while walking over a fountain surrounded by flowers. "The apocalypse is afoot."

"Why are you talking like that?"

Balthazar shrugged. "Nothing matters anymore. We'll all be dead in a few months anyway."

"I'm glad your optimism is untouched." Castiel replied with a grin. "We will need that."

"Six angels died trying to stop Lilith from rising them. I bet you did not know that."

"I, in fact, did not."

"And 20 hunters are dead, too. And I bet you did not know the Winchesters just dealt with witnesses themselves. They survived, though."

Castiel shook his head, trying to hide his horror. "I've been busy."

"Sure. You were too busy reading about your protégé." Balthazar said, giving a quick glance at his friend and a small smirk.

Castiel's eyes opened wide.

"Don't worry. I won't say anything. But I am worried that…uhm…reading will influence you."

"Influence me to do what?"

Balthazar jumped off the fountain and looked at Castiel in the eye. "Look, Cassie. We all know you are not unfamiliar with humanity. You are, uhm, obsessed with them. You love watching them and understand them…That combined with the bond you recently acquired with a human you actually saved…"

"Why do you keep worrying? I will not go sideways, Balthazar. I serve heaven and forever will. I serve God."

"Just be careful, friend."

They were quiet for a moment until Castiel asked, "Which seal do you think will be next."

"There are thousands to choose from. This battle will be tricky."

"I need to talk to Dean as soon as possible, then."

Balthazar grinned. "Sure. Get that as an excuse."

Castiel appeared in the kitchen of the house Dean was staying at. He made sure his wings didn't flap ferociously as he landed this time, and no bulbs broke as he appeared (mostly because they were all off but still saw that as a win.)

Dean felt him arrive. Castiel knew he felt him. The bond must have woken him from his sleep to announce his presence. And, sure enough, a few seconds later, Dean stood up and approached him.

Castiel did a quick comment on their performance with the witnesses and Dean thanked him, even when Castiel did not feel those thanks sincere.

"I thought angels were supposed to be guardians." Dean said and Castiel wanted to laugh. Here he was, guarding him. And only him. And Dean was recriminating that. True, Castiel had not done his job because he was reading his book. But the point was he was Dean's guardian. That was the main reason why he was standing before him in a vessel in the first place. That was why they had to send him and not another angel.

Because he had become Dean's guardian.

But Castiel had other things to do. He couldn't guard Dean Winchester the whole time. A war was looming. He could see that now. While he read, six angels died in battle. Seemed like leisure was gone and he had to fight now.

And Dean had so many doubts in his faith it was difficult to fight him. He even threatened to kick Castiel's ass! This human…A human Castiel could tear with a lift of his finger was barking at him as if he could stand a chance. And somehow, the action was endearing. And Castiel was found without words.

"This is some kind of a sign to the apocalypse." Dean said.

Castiel smiled. They had come up with the answers themselves. Humanity would never cease to surprise him, indeed.

That's why we're here." Castiel said. And added, "Big things afoot," mocking Balthazar. Then Castiel paved the way to talk to dean about the seals. Finally explain to him his mission, now that he at least acknowledged his existence. Now that he wasn't in shock.

But un-shocked Dean was difficult. Untrustworthy. Whatever Castiel said, Dean would not believe, to the point Castiel had to threaten him. How could Uriel and Balthazar think that a human like this would make him go down? A stubborn man like this? Untrusty, atheist man as this?

Castiel left for heaven after threatening the man he was supposed to protect and went directly to the strategy committee. They had to all work together to stop the seals from breaking and stop Lucifer from rising. And Castiel had to stop wasting time reading dumb books and get to work in what really mattered.

Protecting humanity.