Hello once again my good friends! (sucking up BIGTIME) Yeah... About that... Let me apologize right here and now for what I'm about to do (and what I already have done) to sweet, little Roxy. (Cringes under death glares) Please understand that it is a plot-thing. I had to... Just go on and you'll see alright? (hides)

Thanks once again to my amazing reveiwers! Without you, there would be an update once a week, if we're all lucky. But because you all give me SO MUCH ego-candy, I cannot resist the update! WOOHOO! (please don't stop...)

Lashing Out At Shadows

Chapter the Fourth: Emptiness

Roxas wasn't really as shy as he seemed at first glance. Or, at least, that's what he liked to believe. He was tough, you see, and the shell around him got stronger and thicker with every passing day. Not even Aeris, who had known him for ten long years, had been inside his walls. (Although, there was a point in time where she had been closer than anyone else.)

Now, Roxas stood with her, a full month after the first time Axel visited his house, wishing he was not there at all.

"Rox," Aeris said lovingly, trying to brush the blond hair out of his eyes. He pulled away, not allowing her delicate fingers to touch him. Aeris sighed sadly. "Roxas, please." He refused to meet her gaze. "Roxas, I-"

"Axel will be here soon to study." He said flatly, completely ignoring the pleading look in her dark green eyes. He was being harsher than he meant to, and when she stood and shuttled to the kitchen in the most depressed way feasible, he began to regret his attitude already. Before he thought himself into a knot, he stood up and walked out the front door. He stood on the porch, jacketless, his eyes closed, feeling the soft, chilling breeze blow across his whole body.

He stayed like this for what could have been a minuet or a month, waiting, until he heard the crunching of feet on the snowy sidewalk.

"Hey, there." Axel said, grinning. His flamingly red hair was trapped under the hood of his now famous back hoodie, and his hands were jammed inside the pockets tightly.

Roxas nodded at the taller boy. The two had used the entire month to study and get a little more acquainted. Now, Christmas break was finally upon them. This would be their last study session until school was back in session. Roxas wasn't sure if he was relieved, or sad about that fact. On one hand, Axel was a horrible student, who lost interest quickly and day-dreamed too much. On the other, Roxas had never actually hung out with someone his age before, someone that maybe – just maybe, mind you – had a little something in common with him.

The boys entered the house where they met freshly-brewed hot chocolate and Aeris' newest delicacy: Three River Fudge. She smiled as Axel unzipped his sweatshirt and pushed up the sleeves. "Good to see you again, Axel." She said warmly. Axel grinned and returned the comment. Roxas tried to pretend he hadn't noticed the slightest twinge of pain in her deep green eyes.

"What's the occasion?" Axel asked conversationally as he seated himself at the breakfast bar.

"Christmas break," replied Aeris with a smile that seemed forced only to Roxas, who understood the reason. She placed a steaming mug in front of each of the boys. "I wanted to give you two something special to celebrate all the progress you've made."

"We don't know that we've made any yet," laughed Axel as he blew on his drink. "Wait to celebrate until the spring, when we know if I have to start high school all over again or not." He chuckled, not noticing the way Aeris' laugh was less than half-hearted.

She glanced at the clock. "Sorry boys," she said hastily, "But I've got to be off early today. Appointment with the doctor." She smiled as she slid on her over coat. "Be good, and don't leave too many of those for later!" She smiled weakly at Roxas, crossing her fingers in a way that only he could see. Then she waved and left.

"Why's she going to the doctor?" Axel asked, selecting a fudge to consume. Roxas said nothing. He stared at his drink, trying very hard not to be sick right then and there.

Aeris, he thought. My Aeris, she's going away… one way or another… I can't stop her… It's time to grow up… He said……

"Hey," Axel shook his friend's shoulder. "Yo, Roxas? You don't look so good. Are you okay?"

Roxas blinked hard and shook the thoughts from his mind. "Fine," he muttered.

"You sure?" Roxas had never seen Axel's bright green eyes look so shiny, so worried. Roxas nodded. Axel stared for a moment before sighing. "Alright, whatever. Just warn me if you think you're going to puke."

Axel had no tact what-so-ever when it came to sickness. Roxas huffed. He just doesn't get it, he decided.

It was much later in the afternoon when the boys sat on Roxas' bedroom floor, closing the books and thinking about their own things. Axel sighed at Roxas' abnormally dismal mood. The fuse is getting short, He commented to himself thoughtfully. What can I do about it? The red-head fretted about this a little more until the books were all cleaned up and the boys sat in a less-than-comfortable silence. Then it hit him.

"Smile, Goddamn it." He growled at his smaller counterpart.

Roxas glanced up at him from the patch of carpet he had been staring at, and raised an eyebrow.

"Smile." Axel demanded eyes narrowing.

Roxas didn't oblige.

"I said… Smile." Axel was getting annoyed now, he intensified the glare. As soon as he did, the blonde averted his ocean-blue eyes, choosing to stare at more carpet instead. Axel took advantage of this moment to poke the boy in the ribs. Soon, he had the blond laying on the floor, heaving, as he poked at his ticklish ribs. Roxas was smiling – sort of.

Suddenly, at a random poke from the red-head, Roxas gasped, his eyes welling with instant tears. Axel pulled away instantly. The boy sat up, clutching a spot on his right side, panting, and refusing to meet the taller boy's eyes.

"What?" Axel asked simply, his eyebrows furrowing.

Roxas said nothing at first, but let the red-head suffer for a long moment before whispering, "Nothing." He still would not look into the piercing green eyes of his study partner.

"You're hurt?"

"It's nothing."

"That isn't nothing." Axel put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Speak to me."

Roxas scowled and shrugged off his touch. "Forget it."

"Rox,"

"Shut up!" Roxas glared up at the taller boy for a long second, eyes full of – Was that hatred? After a moment, his eyes softened visibly, and he looked back at the carpet. "Sorry," he murmured to the beige-hued floor covering.

For the first time in his life, Axel truly had no clue of what to say. Finally words found him. "Seifer?"

The boy nodded. Axel growled. Then, wait… he thought. Seifer left for Christmas vacation early. We haven't seen him in a week! He gasped at his findings and looked at Roxas frantically.

"No," Axel barely managed to say in an almost even tone. "It wasn't Seifer."

Roxas looked up at him quickly, as if afraid of the conclusion he was preparing to make.

"He's been away," Axel's eyes widened at his own stupidity. "Has someone else been hurting you?"

Roxas bit his lip and screwed his eyes up very tightly. He shook his head persistently.

"Rox!" Axel was nearing the point of panic now. "Who's been hitting you?"

Roxas refused to say, but when he heard the door slam downstairs, his eyes popped open and rushed to the clock on the wall. 8:00pm. He gasped for air. "It's late," he whispered. "You shouldn't be here. He jumped to his feet and gathered the books in a frenzy. "You need to leave…" another loud sound emanated from the lower level. "Now!"

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's happening here." Axel hoped his words sounded stronger than he felt.

The thumping of feet coming up the steps made Roxas flinch and jump at the taller boy, piling the books into his arms and – catching him off guard – shoving him into the small, dark closet. The blond shut the door with a click and breathed, "Stay," through the keyhole. Axel saw no way around doing as he was told, for the moment at least. He could just barely see the door to the hallway open and a person come through.

An argument ensued. The person was a man, with a deep voice and large hands. Roxas defended his case half-heartedly, trying to explain why all the milk was gone. Axel flinched at the sound of the quiet boy speaking more – and faster – than he had ever heard before. Axel felt dizzy and sick. The milk was gone because they drank it with the fudge… Because I had four glasses… the taller boy thought, feeling quite nauseous.

His sickness intensified when he heard the muffled cry of his friend as the man back slapped him across the jaw, shouting about something else. He said something that sounded sort of like "Useless wench!" (although it was very slurred) as Axel watched him lift the boy to his feet and hit him again.

Roxas hardly made a sound, even when the man kicked him in the stomach, causing his breath to leave him in a sudden whoosh. The man left the room, slamming the door behind him. Axel could hear the large feet thundering down the staircase.

He burst from the closet, only to find Roxas lying on his side, gasping for breath, tears filling in his eyes that he refused to let fall. Axel sank to his knees, and placed a soft hand on the boy's arm. Roxas instantly shrank away, screwing his eyes shut and grinding his teeth.

"It's just me." Axel whispered softly. "Just Axel."

Roxas slowly raised himself to a sitting position, shaking all over. He refused to look at the red-head. "You weren't supposed to see that." He muttered bitterly. There was a trail of blood leaking from the corner of his mouth, and his cheek on the same side was already beginning to swell up. He looked a mess already, and Axel knew he'd be worse off in the morning.

Axel frowned. "You should've said something."

The blonde boy wiped the blood from his lips angrily. "Why?"

"Because I could help."

"No," Roxas said sternly. "You couldn't. It isn't easy, like – like avoiding Seifer." He closed his eyes and leaned against the bed frame, looking pale. "You can't just stare him down."

"But," Axel felt his veins beginning to boil with hate. "He's… He's-"

"He's my dad." Roxas said, turning his ocean-blue eyes directly on Axel's. "He's the only family I have."

It was Axel's turn to break the gaze. He didn't know what to do. Roxas needed help; a rescue. This wasn't a safe place for him. But on the other hand, Axel knew what it was like to loose everything because of one person's actions. "Does Aeris know?" He asked finally, staring at the floor.

"Don't you dare tell her." The blonde seethed, his voice dripping with malice.

Axel's head jerked up. He stared at the small boy in horror. "If Aeris knew, she'd-"

"It would break her heart!" Roxas interrupted crudely. Axel fell instantly silent. "All these years," the small boy continued quietly, "She has been scared that something would happen to me when my dad wasn't home. She never imagined that he was the one…" He trailed off, touching his newest injury softly.

"She'd never forgive herself… Would she?" Axel finished quietly, feeling about as awful as his friend looked.

Roxas nodded sadly. "She's watched me… since she was ten." he whispered. "Her whole life," he looked at the floor in shame, "Has been about keeping me away from harm."

"You're still keeping things from me, aren't you?" Axel asked in a low voice. He gazed into the sorrow-filled eyes of his best friend, and thought he saw tears forming there. The boy nodded slowly. "About Aeris?" Another nod. Axel tried not to groan out load. "What is it?"

Roxas refused to say. "In an hour," he said instead, "My dad will be asleep. That's when you'll have a chance to leave unseen. I suggest you take it." He closed his eyes again.

"What are you going to tell Aeris?"

"I fell." It sounded so absolute, so practiced, that Axel found himself wondering how many times in the last month Roxas had 'fallen'. He shuttered at the thought.

"You're not going to tell me about Aeris, are you?" Axel said after several long minuets of silence.

"No." the other boy said simply.

Axel sighed. "Okay."

More silence ensued, until Roxas muttered, "You're not going anywhere today, are you?"

"Nope." the red-head replied sternly.

"… Okay." Roxas sighed. Axel smirked. "What?"

Axel shook his head and moved next to the smaller boy, so he could lean against the bed's frame. "Tomorrow," He decided, as he folded his arms behind his head, "We'll go out and hang somewhere. Agreed?"

"You don't have to do that." The blonde answered dully.

"I know," Axel said, raising an eyebrow, "But you're gonna need a better story then 'I fell' if you really want to keep all this quiet."

Roxas smiled ever-so-slightly. "You'd lie for me?"

Axel laughed heartily. "Roxas, you poor innocent soul, I would lie for a Klondike bar."