Chapter 4: Nicest to You
"Try again, concentrate…" Shadow said.
It had been several hours since Raven had arrived, yesterday's gem ritual was a cake-walk compared to what she was enduring now. They had been doing this one ritual for over two hours and Raven was trying as she might not to howl in pain. Shadow's instruction was for Raven to enter herself, maintain clarity outside of her mind, and exert all of her power through both "doors" simultaneously for as long as she could. All the while, Shadow scrawled notes of progress across a piece of paper and encouraged Raven to continue when she had wanted to stop. The purpose of the ritual was to increase the amount of Raven's power; in preparation for what Shadow said would be the ritual that would ultimately heal her mind. Shadow still wouldn't describe what that ritual would need or how it would be done, because for it to work, she couldn't know ahead of time, or the preparation rituals would be for nothing.
"How…m-much longer?" Raven asked, cringing in pain.
"Another few minutes, at least, don't stifle now, or you will have to repeat it all over again," Shadow warned.
"Is there m-more to it?"
"Yes. I will be asking you a few questions, answer honestly, and quickly. They are quick, basic questions for you, processing and functioning quickly during this ritual will bolster the speed of recovery from any loss of energy in the future."
"Okay"
"How many do you live with?"
"Five."
"Name them."
"Robin, T-Terra, Cyborg, St-starfire, and B-beast-t B-boy."
"Which is nicest to you?"
"Robin."
"Which is meanest to you?"
"Beast Boy."
"Does he hate you?"
"N-no."
"Does he trust you?"
"Y-Yes."
"Why is he mean to you?"
"Doesn't fully u-understand my p-powers, or m-me."
"Back up. Does Robin care about you?"
"Yes."
"Does he trust you?"
"Yes."
"Why does he care about you?"
"I'm his second-in command. I created a link between our minds. He cares about all of us."
"Does he know about the link?"
"Yes."
"Do you care about him?"
"…Yes."
"Are you nice to him?"
"Yes."
"How many do you live with?"
"You already a-asked that q-question."
"Good. You have done considerably well. Your mother couldn't last beyond my fifth question. One last thing: I want you to pull your power completely into your mind and then breathe out…"
Drawing her power back in, Raven then exhaled, and blue smoke followed her breath into the air. Surprised by what she saw, she turned to Shadow.
"It is not uncommon with this ritual; don't concern yourself with the smoke. As I said, you have done considerably well; you should be very pleased with yourself, Raven. For the next week or so, you should be able to function better. By that I mean, you won't pass out, you will be able to use more of your power, and your mind should be clearer."
"What happens when the week is up?"
"Slowly, your mind will return to the state it was in before this ritual, but the amount of power you wield will not change. At our next meeting, you will need to answer more of my questions, during a different ritual. With that said, our next meeting will be in two weeks, as I have preparing to do, and you need to relax your mind."
"I don't know if I can wait that long."
"I'm sure you'll find plenty to keep you busy, what with all the criminals, lunatics, or fools causing mayhem. Or perhaps there will be something more pleasant…or maybe both…"
"Things have been quiet lately; I hope it stays that way. Lately, I have been thinking about my future, and I don't know if I want to stay where I am for much longer. But what else could I do?"
"Paths will reveal themselves to you in time, be patient."
"Yes, I will. Thank you again, I have to get going before they miss me."
"Of course… there is one last thing, it is quite important that you do this. You will need to meditate with Robin, since his mind is linked to yours; he needs to be able to keep his from becoming exposed to yours during the rest of these rituals."
"Alright… I'll talk to him when I get to the tower."
"Until our next meeting…" Shadow said, before disappearing behind her door.
Exiting the crypt, Raven stepped into a portal and appeared outside the tower. To her surprise, she found Robin leaning on the wall next to the front door.
"Why is it that every time I get back here, someone is poised, waiting for me?" Raven asked.
"I couldn't tell you... You have been out a lot this past week. I'm not sure that's good for you right now..." Robin said, concerned.
"Sometimes meditating in my room isn't enough, are you going to lock me in there if I want to go somewhere now?"
"No, but if you pass out away from here we won't be able to help."
"None of you... can help me," she said, walking past him. He grabbed her arm and whirled her around to face him.
"What is it? You aren't acting like yourself at all: you avoid Terra, you try and avoid me, and every time you come back from where you go, you are extremely tired and irritable. I've seen you meditate, and it doesn't make you act like this..." Robin said, "So, what have you been doing?"
Hesitating, she pulled her arm out of his grip and looked around anxiously, before looking at him again.
"When I started passing out, I tried to find something that could help me, and I came across the location of a guide that had helped my mother. So, I went to see if the guide was still alive and could help me..." Raven said, pausing for his reaction.
Robin started to say something, getting more concerned, but held back and calmed himself. "So, you have been going to see this person for the past few days?" he asked.
"Yes."
"And is it... helping?"
"Yes."
"That's good news... but you should have told one of us about it, what if the "guide" had attacked you?"
"I knew you would be like this... That's why I didn't tell you, I needed help, and coming in with the rest of you ready to blast a mouse if it even flinched at me wasn't going to get me the help I sought."
"You still should have told me," he said, his voice rising.
"I don't need to report every thought I have or action I take to you...you controlling ass," Raven said angrily, turning to leave. Again, Robin grabbed her arm and pulled her closer than she had been. He was about to snap at her, but thought that adding to her stress with a fight wouldn't help. Later, he would bring it up when she wasn't so on edge.
"Hey...I'm sorry...I've just been worried about you. It's just...I don't fully know what's happening to you and I don't know if it will get worse or not..." he said.
"I see. Sorry I snapped at you... So, I know you wanted to spend more time with me..."
"Yeah?"
"My mother's guide has been leading me through certain healing spells and the next ones will be rather intense... Because of the mental link through our bond, we need to make sure your mind can protect itself from the effects of the repairs mine will be going through. To do that, we need to meditate together."
"You're making me nervous again..."
"Um...Deal with it?"
"Okay," he laughed, "So when do you want to start?"
"Tomorrow, if we could," she said.
"Sounds good," he said.
They started walking into the tower together. Even though Robin wasn't asking her any more questions, she could practically hear more of them echoing in the silence. Does it hurt? Should I be getting ready in some way? Is this guide really the same one that helped your mother? I don't even know this 'guide's name... What is it? Why won't she talk to me about all of this?
"Stop it..." she said to him.
"What?" he asked.
"I know you are thinking of more questions about what I'm doing."
"Really? Ok... can you hear this next thought?"he asked.
She heard the thought, blushed, shook it off and angrily said:"...Think that again and I will mentally turn off that water, hit you with the curtain rod, and then hang you from it with a towel. Good thing I lock my bathroom door..."
"Wow, sorry," Robin said, chuckling.
"I hope you don't just want to spend time with me for that," Raven said.
"I don't."
"I'm not convinced, yet..."
"Are you saying yes?"
"I'm about ready to just-."
"I was just kidding, Raven, I'm still thinking about that whole idea too... "
"And?"
"I'll talk about it if you will." he said.
"Um...Later..." she said.