The Triple

I was sleeping.

Peacefully, humbly, innocently getting my rest. This was what normal Arrancar did. They slept and then got up in the morning and did their thing. Eventually, the process would start all over again. I suppose this isn't true for Ulquiorra. I was happily underneath my covers all nice and warm when suddenly a certain, very unwelcome voice woke me up.

"Wake up."

Shoving my pillow over my face, I mumbled in his general direction, "No. I need my sleep and you said I could have the night off from training. Go. Away."

"I am aware of that, but I am waking you because all the fraccions are being summoned."

My face appeared from under the white and unfocusedly looked at the same boring expression, "Come again?"

"I am waking you because all the fraccions are being summoned," He blinked and turned to leave, "be in the Espada's Meeting room in five minutes or suffer the consequences."

Well, that was ominous. Usually, he didn't both with the idea of consequences and just assumed that I knew that came with the package. Yawning, I started the process up hauling myself out of bed at…2:30 in the morning. What was going on?

Digging in my singular drawer for a clean jacket, the same voice came drifting in, "wake up."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. Give me a break, I am awake."

"All the fraccions are being summoned, be in the Espada's Meeting room in five minutes or suffer the consequences."

I stopped and looked back. Ulquiorra was standing there. Ulquiorra had just been there. I didn't know that he had memory problems.

"Sure, whatever," I waved him off and went back to digging.

Finally, I found the singular white jacket that didn't have a blood/stain/rip/tea on it. If I was going to the meeting room, Lord Aizen was probably going to be there. Sometimes, having a single rip in your clothing could count as "disloyalty" and he would set that crazy, "justice", blind guy after you until there was nothing left.

Shoot, the button that kept the flappy thing from buckling had popped off. I searched into the bottom of the drawer for that one elusive safety pin.

"Wake up."

My hand curled into a ball of anger, of course, right around the open pin. The pointy end went straight into my palm. I curse loudly and swung to face the suddenly forgetful Espada.

"I. Am. Awake." I accented every word with a just a tiny bit of my frustration.

"Come to the Espada Meeting room in five minutes-"

"-Or suffer the consequences! I get it," I growled, my brain still wasn't even booted up, "and I would be there already if it hadn't been for you." Not completely true, but hey, it was 2:30 AM. The concept was close enough.

He narrowed his eyes, "Don't get cocky fraccion. Remember your place."

I yanked the pin from my hand and watched the little red dot form, "you do realize it's not even really morning yet? Get off my back."

The Espada turned and left. I was fumbled around with the pin. It seemed that my fingers didn't want to work in their sleepy state. I didn't blame them. Using my teeth to hold the cloth in place, I tried to pin the pieces together once again.

"Fraccion," the same voice went and I had enough. The safety pin went flying through the air. Its path led straight towards the Espada. It was easily caught with just two fingers.

"If I could just get this flappy thing to be unflappy-like and shove that pin in place then I would be there already! Don't you have other fraccion to bug?" I snapped as pointed at the stone face Arrancar.

He blinked and set the pin down carefully, "I see."

Then I noticed something, Ulquiorra was wearing one of those children's paper party hats probably leftover from the birthday fiasco. This one was red and white. It was quite comical really. I didn't dare ask why since I had just thrown a pin at his face.

"Don't bother with your lapel. There is no need," for the fourth time today, he turned to the door. "Come with me."

I raised an eyebrow but didn't ask questions. The minute we started walking, I knew something was off. There was a strange amount of…corruption in the atmosphere of Las Noches. It was big because I didn't notice these of things unless they were elephant-sized.

"What's up with this place?" I voiced my thought as we started to near the Espada Meeting room. I should mention that it was typically off limits to tiny little bugs like fraccions, but today that didn't seem to be the case.

"You will see."

I couldn't help it; my mouth said it. "Does it have something to do with the party hat on your head?"

The cold reply could have frozen my toes off. "The hat was not of my design. It is simply necessary."

"Oh."

We walked in silence until we came to the door to the meeting room. Thumping, thrashing, banging and other encouraging signs were seeping from inside it. The room was supposed to be sound proof.

"This will explain everything. Your job is to keep them from leaving using any means necessary."

Ulquiorra opened the door and I peeked inside.

"What the…?"

In the corner, three Harribels were escalating to a fight with three Nnoirtas. The three Yammies were all arm wrestling with each other. The Zommabarris were meditating with an eminence amount of hooming and humming, random sun symbols appearing on the walls around them. Why? Because of the huge cracks that were forming in them as all three of the Grimmjows fought, screaming that they were king. From the sidelines, three old gesters were yelling that they should shut up and agree that he was the rightful king. There was a pile of three sleeping Starrks who seemed to care less about the world. Six creepy heads bubbled around in their tanks, showing off random forms, trying to outdo each other.

Best of all, three other Ulquiorras stood in opposite corners, probably not wanting to affiliate with each other. I smirked at this and looked back at the Ulquiorra with the party hat on.

"I didn't know that everybody wanted triples."

He watched a chair be completely destroyed by a Nnoirta, "No one did. One of Szyeal's experiment went wrong and all the data samples from the Espada were in it. He and his doubles are working on a solution now."

"Looks like the yous hate you."

Ulquiorra sighed, "It seems so. I would have thought differently."

"Nobody likes you, Ulquiorra, not even copies of yourself."

That got a twitch of an eyebrow, "At least I - we are civil enough to not try and fight each other." A Grimmjow flew into the wall. Getting up, he spat what I hope wasn't teeth, and jumped back into the brawl.

"So you wear the hat so people know it's the real you?"

"Yes."

"You still look stupid in it." Who knows, it could have been fashionable, but I highly doubted it.

Ulquiorra turned to the door and curtly finished the conversation, "Just keep them in here."

He locked the door behind him. I looked and saw a group of fraccion huddling a corner, trying to stay alive. I joined them. No way was I going to get in the way of an Espada fighting another Espada, even if technically they were the same Arrancar.

It was quite a good show actually.

Rose202, AizheNi, maylavender and Winter 'neechan all reviewed this story, I feel so loved! Also, maylavender, Rose202, and DemonColours now have spots on my awesome list for favoriting this story. Rose202 also betaed this chapter, so thanks again!

I wonder WHAT Syzeal was doing with all those samples...we can only wonder. This started with the image of Ulquiorra with one of those huge mexican hats on, just google "ulquiorra mexican hat" and it's the first and second ones. Quite priceless.

Next week's chapter? Christmas themed of course! :P

Review?

-Quin

Bleach=Tite Kubo, Sola=Quihwyvar, yes?