Toonville: The Official 2013 Reboot
Season 1, Episode 3: TwiDash
Plot: Twilight Sparkle's assistant Spike solidifies a bet that she can't last in a "romantic" relationship with his marefriend Rainbow Dash without some kind of diffiuculty. However, behind Twilight's back, Spike and Dash plan to try and make her quit out.
Sub-plot: After hearing of the bet, Lumpy, being the wild and jumpy master of dumbassery, begins to get in the middle of the betting pool, which results in a fan war of massive proportions.
Rated M for strong language and several accounts of adult situations. Most episodes could stand at a T rating, however, despite the story being M on this site. There are also some moments where someone seems out-of-character to what personality they had in their own show, but that's mainly because of the character development in this series differenting from the shows this show combines.
This episode focuses on the pros and cons of dares and bets.
I do not own any of the characters and props used for this show (with a couple of exceptions), because they belong to their rightful owners (IE: FOX, Hasbro, Cartoon Network, Mondo Media)
(Not actual) Airdate of this episode: March 17, 2013
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Here's another profile, for several characters making their first appearance in this season:
Mordecai, the Responsible Blue Jay
Show of origin: Regular Show
Voiced by: J.G. Quintel
Likes: Video games, getting the job done, "punchies", Margaret
Dislikes: Work he thinks is too tough for him to take
Rigby, the Lazy Raccoon
Show of origin: Regular Show
Brief description on his character in the show: He is still lazy, but he had a sexual/romantic relationship with Rainbow Dash for part of 2011 and most of 2012.
Voiced by: William Salyers
Likes: Candy, sleeping, jumping, having fun, video games
Dislikes: Work, "punchies"
Trixie, the Self-Proclaimed Great and Powerful One
Age: 22
Show of origin: My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
Brief description on her character in the show: Since this show is starting at the beginning of 2013, Trixie is still on good terms with Twilight, but has difficulty with some of her friends, including Spike and Rainbow Dash, who honestly hate her.
Voiced by: Kathleen Barr
Likes: Magic, competition
Dislikes: Rainbow Dash, being called out for being a bitch and/or fraud
Fluttershy, the Squeaking Little Shy One
Age: 18
Show of origin: My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
Voiced by: Andrea Libman (same as Pinkie Pie)
Likes: Nature, animals, baby dragons
Dislikes: Being frightened, evil magic, big scary dragons
Anthony Padilla, that Funny Guy
Show of origin: None: based off of the guy of the same name in Smosh.
Voiced by: Himself
Ian Hecox, the Funny Guy's Best Friend
Show of origin: None: based off of the guy of the same name in Smosh.
Voiced by: Himself
Okay, on with the show...
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At the popular Toon Hub, animal best friends blue jay Mordecai and raccoon Rigby of Regular Show fame were taking turns playing on an arcade. Do you have any idea what they're playing? The screen is obscured by Mordecai and Rigby's figures in the camera angles used here.
Voiceover of Flippy: What is a bet? According to an online dictionary, a bet is "An agreement usually between two parties that the one who has made an incorrect prediction about an uncertain outcome will forfeit something stipulated to the other." That's the long version. Anybody could bet on something, but they have the risk of losing what they bet on, considering these kinds of activities can go either way.
Soon enough, Rigby managed to top Mordecai in the arcade game.
Rigby: Haha! In your face!
Mordecai: Agh, 3 in a row?! How do you do that!?
Rigby: A true playa never reveals his secrets. I could do this with one hand tied behind my back!
Mordecai: *holds up roll of duct tape* Care to bet on that?
Rigby: ...You're on! *puts one hand behind his back so Mordecai could tape it up so it stays*
While the raccoon and the bird decided on that bet, we moved away from them to meet up to the main spot for our main and major characters, in the middle of the Toon Hub. Lumpy was busy Tweeting on his iPhone, Flippy was writing in The Guide, Twilight Sparkle was reading, like always, and the lovely interspecies couple of Rainbow Dash and Spike were... busy locking lips and curling tongues. Have you at all noticed how awkward and yet how cute it is for a 10-year-old baby dragon and an 18-year-old pegasus to be making out? Weird. It's been almost five months since Rainbow and Spike got together, and it sometimes got on Twilight's nerves, considering her assistant is in a full-time relationship with a full-grown mare.
The make-out session between the cyan pegasus and the baby dragon was a bit noisy, as the moaning and the slight slurping annoyed mostly Twilight, but also caught some attention from Lumpy. Flippy barely noticed, as his eyes were glued to The Guide.
Lumpy: Um, are we supposed to listen to you two *referring to Dash and Spike* sucking face?
Flippy: I can't even focus...
Twilight Sparkle: I agree; couldn't you two do that somewhere else?
Rainbow Dash: *stopping the making-out* If you don't like it, you could always move.
Lumpy: Oh, like we'd ever go to another table!
Twilight Sparkle: Well, I-I'm certainly surprised how you two managed to get together so suddenly. It's almost scary.
Spike: Hey, what can I say? Sparks are flying between us. *he and Rainbow continue making out*
Twilight Sparkle: *facepalms*
Lumpy: *during pan-left from focus on Twilight to show him getting out a tweet on his iPhone* "Twilight getting... annoyed... by Rainbow and Spike." Well, now my latest tweet matches this situation.
Flippy: *looking up from The Guide* What situation.
Lumpy: *points towards Rainbow Dash and Spike kissing*
Flippy: Oh. Well, don't do it on the table; this is a public place.
Lumpy: Ha!
Rainbow Dash: Don't worry, I'm much oblidged to clean up when we're done. *chuckles*
Lumpy: Heh-heh-heh, sexual innuendos everywhere.
Rainbow Dash: I'd stick that up my ass.
Overhearing the not entirely suitable conversation, Twilight put her book down, and began to walk away from the table.
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, I have a headache just listening to all this.
Flippy: Hmm. I wonder what her problem is.
Lumpy: It's probably that time of the month.
Flippy: *getting the joke, but not liking it* Dude, no. Just... no.
Lumpy: What? All kinds of women get angry at some point every month.
Flippy: ...Oh. I thought you meant-
Lumpy: -having a period? No, that's too predictable.
Rainbow Dash: Eh, who cares what her deal is. It doesn't change anything. Besides, who should we feel bad for?
Cue Rigby from earlier walking by, angry and sad at the same time, as if he lost a bet or something. To make a long story short, he did.
Rigby: I guess I'll go back to two hands.
Alright, there should be an intro somewhere around here...
(CUE OPENING VIDEO SEQUENCE)
Flashy, flying around shots of West Toonville at night, with lights shining from just about every building around. It was like New York City! Well, you know, before Hurricane Sandy showed up.
(Song playing: To Be Loved by Papa Roach)
Take your past and burn it up and let it go
Carry on; I'm stronger than you'll ever know
That's the deal; you get no respect
You're gonna get yours
You better watch your fucking neck
I want domination
I want your submission
I've gotta roll the dice
Never look back and never think twice
Whoa I'll never give in
Whoa I'll never give up
Whoa I'll never give in
And I just wanna be, wanna be loved
Whoa I'll never give in
Whoa I'll never give up
Whoa I'll never give in
And I just wanna be, wanna be loved
The song cuts to an end, as the Toonville logo appears on screen.
(END SEQUENCE)
(Next scene: Twilight Sparkle's library, more than half an hour after the previous scene)
The odd thing was, after Twilight Sparkle left the Toon Hub, while most expected her to come back a little later, she didn't. In fact, she stayed in her treehouse/library trying to recollect herself with some coffee. Spike was nervous about what was probably going on in Twilight's mind, as he returned home from the Toon Hub. Kinda odd that Rainbow Dash wasn't wrapped around him like usual.
Spike: Uh, Twilight? *Twi looks from her coffee mug to Spike* ...C-Can we talk?
Twilight sighed as her magic let go of the mug, and she hopped off the chair she was sitting on.
Twilight Sparkle: ...What is it?
Spike: *scratching the back of his head* Uh, Twi?
Twilight Sparkle: Yes?
Spike: You see...
Twilight Sparkle: *slowly getting impatient* Yeaaah?
*beat*
Spike: Uh...
I think Spike just brain-farted.
Already getting quite impatient, Twilight put a hoof to her forehead, as Spike flinched, believing he was probably going to get smacked. Whoa, stay calm dude.
Twilight Sparkle: Spike, if you want to ask me something, you don't have to be scared.
Spike: Well, it's about me and Rainbow Dash.
Twilight Sparkle: *turning away from Spike* Ugh, not this again...
Spike: Twi? Whoa, what's the problem with Rainbow Dash? She's one of your friends, right?
Twilight Sparkle: ...Well, I suppose that's true.
Spike: That's because it is! *realizes something* ...Wait, do you... do you not like that I'm in love with her? Is it because you think she's irresponsible? Are you jealous or something! *grabbing onto Twilight's mane* Tell me!
Twilight Sparkle: It's not like that! It's... it's just... you two got together so suddenly, it's almost creepy. I mean, your tastes have so suddenly changed; what ever happened to your crush on Rarity?
Spike: Who? *Twilight's eyes shift around in nervousness* Oh, right, her.
Twilight Sparkle: See what I mean?
Spike: I see.
After a brief pause, Twilight began to walk away from Spike, but the little dragon grabbed onto one of her hind legs.
Spike: But wait!
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, what?!
Spike: But... do you think she's irresponsible?
Twilight Sparkle: *trying to stay honest* ...Yes. She is.
Spike: Oh my gods, Twilight-[1]
Twilight Sparkle: I'm saying the whole truth. Although she is a reckless flyer, and she isn't entirely right for someone your age-*Spike gasps*-she... actually, that's all I can say.
Spike: *angered* Twi, you son of a-
Twilight Sparkle: And don't think I know what you're about to say! *forces Spike off her leg*
Spike put his head down to the floor to take a moment to himself... until he got a hell of an idea circling his brain.
Spike: How about you try to be with her?
Twilight Sparkle: *turning back around* Excuse me?
Spike: I'm just asking; what if you were in my place, with Rainbow Dash?
Twilight Sparkle: ...What are you talking about?
Spike: I'll admit we aren't entirely right for each other if you stay in a romantic relationship with Rainbow Dash, the same way me and Dash love each other.
Twilight Sparkle: *chuckling, a bit worried* Y-you're joking, right? Right?
Spike: *intimidatingly* Am I?
Twilight Sparkle: *gasps, now a bit more frightened in her realization* ...You are sick! I'm not loving it up with Rainbow Dash! I am not a lesbian!
Spike: Well, the only way you could get out of this is if you admit we are a great pair. *stretches out a claw for a handshake* You in or out?
After a moment of thinking, Twilight sighed...
...and grasped Spike's claw, sealing the bet.
Twilight Sparkle: Fine. I accept your offer, and... I hope Celestia will forgive me for this.
Spike: Alright, it's a bet. Now, I guess we have to contact Rainbow Dash.
(Next scene: Sweet Apple Acres, the Apple residence) [2]
Rainbow Dash: You want be to do what with Twilight?!
Spike and Twilight Sparkle were now with Rainbow Dash, in the Apple family kitchen, and Rainbow had just been told about the bet that involved her and Twilight being in a romantic relationship, as Spike said. Southern friend Applejack sat by as the negotiations went down.
Spike: It's only for the bet, RD; no need to freak out about it.
Rainbow Dash: I have more than enough reasons! One: me and Twilight, we're both girls, and two: we're not exactly on the same page right now!
Applejack: I agree with Rainbow; it sounds pretty ridiculous, quite frankly.
Spike: Well, don't worry about me; I'm not really the jealous type.
Twilight Sparkle: Look, Dash, this hurts me as much as it does to you, but I'm not taking any other chances, and when this is all over, it'll be just a distant memory.
Rainbow Dash: Well, I'm sure I don't give a damn about Twilight or the bet.
Spike: But... *sighs* Uh, Twilight? Could you step out for a moment?
Twilight Sparkle: Uh... okay? *teleports out of the room*
Spike huddled up with his marefriend in the middle of the kitchen, for a private meeting. I wonder if they have a plan going...
Spike: Look, between you and me, this doesn't change our relationship... a lot... and it's best for you to accept this challenge.
Rainbow Dash: Why should I?
Spike: *smirks sinisterly* I have a plan. Remember when I said that if Twilight loses, she has to admit we're perfect for each other?
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, why? ...Wait, you don't mean...
Spike: How about we make sure she doesn't make it? Make these next few days a bit too much to take for her. What do you say?
Rainbow Dash: ...I like the way you think, Spikey.
Applejack: *overhearing Spike and Dash's huddle-up* Uh, y'all know I can hear ya, right?
Rainbow Dash stared at the orange pony, a glow in her eyes flickering, in a threatening to go into rage mode; AJ's eyes widened in fear.
Applejack: I-I think I hear Winona callin'. *ZIP! She's gone, leaving a gust of wind behind*
Twilight Sparkle (off-screen): Ugh, are you two done loving it up yet?
Rainbow Dash: Alright, come back in. *Twilight re-enters the room*
Spike: *clears throat* So, after a moment to think with just the two of us, Rainbow Dash has decided to accept and allow the bet to begin. Isn't that right?
Rainbow Dash: *sighs* I'll give it a shot, for our love.
Spike: Then it's official! Twiley, Dashie, it looks like you're a couple... well, for now.
Twilight Sparkle: *sighs, knowing this is gonna suck for her* Well, I guess it's a date. See you at the Toon Hub... *forcing out of her mouth* Dashie.
With that, the unicorn hesitantly pecked Rainbow Dash on the cheek, before quickly looking back with a look of annoyance in her eyes.
Rainbow Dash: Hmm, I think the first thing you need work on, girlfriend, is how to kiss like a real romantic couple.
After that one line of dialogue, Rainbow grabbed Twilight by her mane, pulled her head down, and forced their lips together in what seems to be a bit of a wet kiss, with the pegasus's tongue going everywhere in the unicorn's mouth, before they separated after almost 10 seconds. After the hard French kiss, Twilight gulped, puking a little in her mouth, an obvious sign that she disliked the kiss, but she did not want to blow it out, so she swallowed the puke, no matter how disgusting it was.
Twilight Sparkle: Wow, that's a... that's a girl kiss.
Spike: *laughs* I'm enjoying this already!
Rainbow Dash: Hold on, I need to get one for the web!
Twilight Sparkle: Wait, wha-MMPH!
Twilight was cut off by Rainbow smashing another kiss on Sparkle's lips, while pulling out her iPhone to take a picture of them kissing. The scene was, however, cut abruptly to move into the next scene with a hard cut.
(Next scene: The Toon Hub, an hour or so later)
Flippy was sitting by with Twilight and Rainbow's friends Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Rarity, along with Peter Griffin and his dog Brian. Things seemed... slow, when suddenly...
Lumpy (heard off-screen): YOU GUYS! YOU GUYS, HEY!
The blue moose came rolling across the table from the right side of the screen, knocking some items down, and landing on the ground on the other side, catching the five other toons off-guard.
Flippy: Whoa, Jesus Christ, man! You spilled my soda! [3]
Lumpy: I feel sorry for your loss of liquid, man, but look at this!
Lumpy pulled out his iPad, which was showing what seems to be a Twitter webpage, where right in the middle was the picture of Rainbow Dash forcing a kiss on Twilight Sparkle, the same one seen being snapshot in the last couple of seconds of the previous scene. There were a few gasps of shock, mostly from Fluttershy and Rarity.
Fluttershy: *squeaking* Oh my...
Rarity: Sweet Celestia!
Pinkie Pie: *not understanding* ...I don't get it. What am I supposed to be shocked about again?
Flippy: Uh, you do realize those are two of your best friends, right? And it doesn't look like Twilight likes it, too.
Lumpy: Well, this is pretty saucy! I wonder how this happened!
Applejack: *walking into the scene* It's a bet!
Lumpy: Heh?
Applejack: Spike bet Twilight that she can't adjust to a relationship with Rainbow Dash, and the only to get out is if Twi admits Spike and Rainbow are perfect for each other. That open things up for ya?
Lumpy: Oh my god... *excited* That's even better!
Flippy: Uh, Lumpy?
Brian Griffin: Whoa, calm down, Lumps.
Lumpy: Do you know how surprising and hot and great this is?!
Applejack: Is he drunk or somethin'?
Lumpy: *gets up on the table* Hey guys, Twilight and Rainbow are doing a date bet!
From another part of the Toon Hub, Ian Hecox and Anthony Padilla, better known as the YouTube duo Smosh, overheard Lumpy's sudden announcement.
Anthony: Wait, those two pony chicks are being forced to date?
Ian: Sounds like it to me! This I gotta see! *runs off*
Anthony: But... they're ponies! Ah, screw it, I'll check it out. *gets up and walks in Ian's direction*
After Lumpy practically splattered the word across the Toon Hub, a crowd of wondering citizens formed around the table he and his friends sat by.
Flippy: Uh, guys? Could there be less people around us, please?
Lumpy: I swear this is the greatest thing I discovered today!
Unnamed Citizen 1: Wait, so who's going down?
Ian: Are they gonna fuck or something? Not that I care, just asking!
Unnamed Citizen 2: How long has this been out?
Lumpy: Ladies, gentlemen, please! I don't know who's going to lose, so calm down.
Unnamed Citizen 3: I'll give you money!
Lumpy: ...What?
Unnamed Citizen 3: Here's $20; I bet the purple one wins!
Lumpy: *getting an idea* ...Deal, bro! Deal!
Unnamed Citizen 3: Just shut up and take my money!
And quickly enough, a few people started pitching in some money, betting on either Rainbow Dash or Twilight Sparkle for the win. The several of Lumpy's friends tried to avoid getting hurt as they ducked under the table. Well, that escalated quickly. Flippy walked over to the wild blue moose, being the most confused and worried.
Flippy: Whoa, Lumpy, what the hell are you doing?
Lumpy: Don't worry, Flippy, my man. This will work out fine... well, for half these people. The other people are definitely getting screwed over when the bet ends.
Flippy: But what is this gonna prove?
Lumpy: Don't worry, the winnings could be doubled!
Peter Griffin: Aw, that's always a good thing.
Flippy: But, Lumpy?
Lumpy: Yeah?
Flippy: Isn't this, like... gambling?
Lumpy: Gambling? No. Hustling? Hell no! Betting? Pretty much.
Flippy: *to himself; sighing* I just know it's gonna end up in a fan war or something. It's gonna suck for some people, somewhere. *walks off*
Lumpy: Woooo! Bring it in boys! And girls, girls too! *looks towards the right of the screen* Oh shit, everybody leave!
What Lumpy noticed was Rainbow Dash, with her arm wrapped around her interm lover Twilight Sparkle. The dozens of people ran off as Lumpy quickly began to hide the hundreds of dollars underneath the table, actually kicking it back, keeping it down just as the two equines made it to the table.
Rainbow Dash: Hey there, guys and mares! So, I'm guessing you heard about the change of events?
Flippy: Um, actually, yes, we have.
Lumpy: I saw it on my iPad.
Twilight Sparkle: Uh, good... to know.
Rainbow Dash: Yeah, the egghead's a little nervous about this, but she'll get used to it. Well, if she can take it.
Flippy: Okay... I'm absolutely lost now. Why are you two... dating? What's this bet that circles this around?
And right on time, Spike popped onto the table from... God knows where, right in between Flippy and Rarity, startling them.
Spike: Well, if you must know, Twilight thinks me and Rainbow Dash aren't exactly a good pair together.
Twilight Sparkle: Remember when I said I'm entitled to my opinion? [4] That's because it's true!
Brian Griffin: Here-here.
Fluttershy: That's true.
Peter Griffin: I agree with the purple one.
Spike: So, after some consideration, I devised a little wager; Twilight will have to try and date Rainbow Dash until she accepts the fact that we belong together. That clear enough for ya?
Flippy: Well, yeah, but...
Rarity: But what exactly will this prove? Are you trying to see how long she can last before she quits?
Spike: Well, to put it that way, that's exactly what it's about.
Peter Griffin: Ahhh. Just one question: how'd you get to this table?
Spike: Not important.
Lumpy: So wait, does this mean you're single again?
Spike: Well, for now, I am. I guess I'll have to find somebody to fill the void if you know what I mean.
Pinkie Pie: Uhhh, I don't think I want in on this.
Fluttershy: Me too...
Applejack: Not a chance, kid.
Rarity: Not interested.
Spike: *pulling out a piece of paper with a thumbtack stuck through and a pen* Alright, I guess I'll let those responses slide for now, but if anybody changes their mind before the little interm romance comes to an end, give me a call.
With that, the dragon wrote down his phone number on the note and stuck it on Rarity's head. [5] Maybe he forced it too hard on her, as a light amount of blood started to drizzle down the fashonista unicorn's head, from where the tack stabbed her. The others recoiled, feeling her pain.
Lumpy: Ugh.
Flippy: Uh...
Fluttershy: *crouches down under the table slowly*
Pinkie Pie: Ouchie.
Peter Griffin: Okay, I got no part of this anymore. *walks away towards the far right of the screen*
Spike: *noticing Rarity's injury* Too hard?
Rainbow Dash: Uh, so me and Twiley should probably make out somewhere else, because this is just getting... yeah...
Twilight Sparkle: We were?
Rainbow Dash: *seriously* Yes, we are. So, see ya later.
Spike: Maybe I probably should've used glue or something. *reaches for the paper* Let me just...
Rarity: No-no. No, Spike. I'll... I'm gonna go. *shivers as she exits off the left screen*
Lumpy: Well... she certainly no-sold that. [6]
Rarity (off-screen): AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Lumpy: Maaaaybe not.
(Next scene: Some average busy sidewalk in Toonville)
In order to "solidify" that she and Twilight Sparkle were a couple, dragged her around the city to find a spot to show affection to each other.
Twilight Sparkle: Uh, Rainbow? Are you feeling okay today? I'm not saying it's bad, but you seem kinda... clingy.
Rainbow Dash: Bitch, please. Would a clingy person do this? *gnaws on one of Twilight's ears erotically*
Twilight Sparkle: Uh, yes.
Rainbow Dash: Well, I'm just kinda in the mood today, if you know what I mean...
Twilight Sparkle: *seeing the lustful look in Rainbow's eyes* ...I most definitely don't.
Rainbow Dash: Oh, I think you'll know what I mean soon enough.
Without any warning, Rainbow pinned Twilight to one of the walls of a building they just happened to stand next to, and began planting kisses on the unicorn's neck, trying very hard to arouse her.
Twilight Sparkle: Whoa, R-Rainbow, what are you-wha-DASH!
Rainbow Dash: Yeah?
Twilight Sparkle: What the hell do you think you're doing?
Rainbow Dash: What, don't you like it?
Twilight Sparkle: First off, a little, and second off, this is a public place! People will see us!
Almost on time, Rainbow and Twilight happened to notice the previously-proclaimed Great and Powerful Trixie (Also from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) passing by them.
Trixie: *scoffs* Get a room, you two.
A few seconds later, the cocky magician stopped herself, and walked in reverse, with widened eyes of confusion, to see Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle in a compromising position.
Trixie: Uh, do I even need to know what's going on here?
Rainbow Dash: We were just about to get down to business, you cock-blocker!
Trixie: *puzzled* ...Excuse me?
Rainbow Dash: That means I was being bothered out of eating out my GF Twilight!
Twilight Sparkle: Eating out?
Rainbow Dash: You really need to learn the sexual jargon, Twi. *kisses her on the nose*
Realizing what was going on between Twilight and Rainbow, Trixie kept some laughter in her mouth by blocking it out with her hoof.
Trixie: *still having Uh, pardon Trixie for this, but she's your what now?
Rainbow Dash: GF: my girlfriend. *seductively* My lover.
Twilight Sparkle: Please keep it in, RD!
Trixie: *bursting into a laughing fit, and rolling on the ground, throwing her hooves everywhere*
Rainbow Dash: *offended* Hey! What's so funny?!
Trixie: *getting back up* Oh, nothing. Just the thought of you two in love just cracks me up! *continues laughing*
Rainbow Dash: *grabbing Trixie by the neck, her rage mode coming close to activating* Hey. No one makes fun of me or my girlfriend, ever.
Twilight Sparkle: Uh, Rainbow?
Rainbow Dash: *to Twilight* Not now! *to Trixie* Either you apologize to the two of us, or the Great and Powerful will become the Great and Silent permanently!
Trixie: *frightened* Y-you're don't mean you could rip my throat out or something, right?
Rainbow Dash: I was thinking ripping your head off by the spine like in Mortal Kombat, but that could always be Plan B! [7]
Trixie: *whimpers*
Rainbow Dash: What's the matter? You scared?
Trixie: N-no! The Great and Powerful Trixie never fears!
Rainbow Dash: I always thought it was the Great and Apologetic Trixie. [8]
Trixie: T-that's a side name!
Rainbow Dash: Good. Then say you're sorry.
Trixie: Uhh...
Rainbow Dash: *punches Trixie in the face* SAY YOU'RE SORRY OR SUFFER!
Trixie: *starting to cry* I-I'm sorry for offending you! Please let me go!
Rainbow did so and dropped Trixie on her plot, letting her run off crying away like a little girl. Twilight shook a little in surprise, feeling sympathy for the blue unicorn. Twilight responded on the brief assault by lightly slapping Rainbow on the head.
Twilight Sparkle: What the hell was that for?!
Rainbow Dash: You saw her! I needed to defend myself and my lover!
Twilight Sparkle: I can see why you did that, but it's just not right to physically assault somebody like that!
Rainbow Dash: Hey, if you don't like it, you can always back out now.
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh! ...I'll try and let that slide.
Rainbow Dash: Thank you for understanding. I'm gonna get back to AJ's. You following?
Twilight Sparkle: *happy* Uh, sure. See you there... *happiness fading down* I guess.
Rainbow Dash: Great. Catch ya later, sweet cakes!
As soon as the cyan pegasus left the scene, Twilight frantically got to her phone from the satchel she carried with her and dialed up , who was busy lounging back at Twilight's library.
Spike: Yeah?
Twilight Sparkle: Spike, I truely believe you should call this bet off. I just had Rainbow Dash smack Trixie up just for laughing at us.
Spike: Did she deserve it?
Twilight Sparkle: What?
Spike: Trixie, duh.
Twilight Sparkle: Spike, you're missing the point already! Call this off!
Spike: Don't worry, Twilight, this will all be over if you just admit me and Rainbow should belong together.
Twilight Sparkle: Spike, I do love you and I know you're my assistant, but you are being quite cruel, young man!
Spike: Oh well, I guess that means you and Rainbow are meant together.
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, you are no help today!
Spike: Anyways, I'll meet up with Rainbow Dash. Hope to see you there. Later, bitch.
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, you mother-*Spike hangs up*
After the phone call was ended abruptly, the angry lavender equine threw her phone to the ground and grunted in frustration as she stomped her way to Applejack's family's home.
(Next scene: Near Sweet Apple Acres)
Lumpy and Flippy were walking by Sweet Apple Acres, as the blue moose took time counting his money from the betting pool that was instantly created a few moments ago.
Flippy: Lumpy, are you sure you want to go ahead with this betting pool? You know things won't go your way at the end.
Lumpy: Things will be different, though. At least almost 90 people have already pitched in, and I got, if I counted right, $1785 dollars in my pocket. However, I'm not spending until Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle's dating phase comes until an end. How's that for saving money?
Flippy: Yeah, but I'm worried. What if this goes... out of hand?
Lumpy: Oh please, Flippy, seriously? What's gonna happen, are there going to be people wearing blue Rainbow Dash or purple Twilight Sparkle t-shirts and proclaming themselves as part of Team Rainbow or Team Twilight? Remember Team Jacob vs. Team Edward? [9] And Team Creddie vs. Team Seddie? [10]
Flippy: Wait, Team Rainbow and Team Twilight? You definitely shouldn't have said that...
Just on what seemed to be perfect timing, the Smosh duo themselves Ian and Anthony showed up, wearing what seemed to be sky blue Team Rainbow Dash shirts.
Ian: Hey, was there an update to the bet? Did Twilight or Rainbow crack yet?
Lumpy: Uh, what's going on here?
Ian: We're both part of Team Rainbow!
Anthony: Ian wanted Rainbow Dash to win, and I got dragged with him.
Flippy: *defending his previous sentence* Told you.
Lumpy: Uhhh... how many others are on Team Rainbow, by any chance?
Ian: Uh, me, Anthony... and I think a few others.
Anthony: And I'm pretty sure there's more on Team Twilight, though.
Cue Pinkie Pie jumping in, having joined Team Twilight Sparkle on account of her Team Twilight shirt.
Pinkie Pie: Go, Twilight! Woohoooo!
The next person to suddenly jump in was American Dad's most entertaining badass black guy, Principal Brian Lewis, and he was with Smosh on Team Rainbow.
Principal Lewis: Ha! I call bullshit on that! That purple little filly wouldn't last the rest of this day without qutting!
Pinkie Pie: Uh, who are you exactly?
Principal Lewis: How 'bout I let *referring to his fist* this do the talking!? *punches Pinkie down to the ground* Yeah! Pegasus power, bitch!
Flippy: *he and Lumpy step back a couple of inches* Dude!
Lumpy: That wasn't necessary!
Soon enough, Fluttershy and Rarity (who was wearing a bandage on her head because of... well, you remember, don't you?) showed up, sporting the Team Twilight colors, and were surprised to find Pinkie knocked down on the ground.
Fluttershy: *gasps* What happened?!
Lumpy: Weird how I'm not the only one asking a question like that.
Principal Lewis: *irritated* Aw shit, there's more of them?! I always thought it was just that little pink girl!
Rarity: You're on Rainbow's side?!
Fluttershy: Team Twilight does not deserve this kind of punishment! You need to leave... well, if you don't mind at least...
Principal Lewis: Hey, it's not my fault your team is full of pussies.
Ian: You tell them... badass black guy who we don't know!
Anthony: Yeah! *to Ian* Seriously, who is he?
Ian: I-I don't know.
Just as the argument continued, Pinkie Pie wobbled up on her feet, holding her bruise, which was located specifically on her left cheek.
Pinkie Pie: *slurring from pain* Uh, guys? Maaaybe we should slow dooowwwwn a bit and-
BANG! She was blasted in the head by Ian, who managed to pull a shotgun out of... I guess hammerspace. [11] Blood splattered almost all over the place as Pinkie's now-lifeless body fell back down on the concrete.
Anthony: *noticing Ian and his shotgun* D-Dude! Why the fuck would you do that?!
Ian: You all saw it! It was coming for us!
Anthony: She was a little girl!
Fluttershy: Actually, she was 17.
Rarity: *now extremely pissed off* Fluttershy, hold me back. I'm about to go batshit crazy on this ungrateful bastard!
Ian: Oh damn!
Ian chose the right idea, and ran off, away from the others, only to be rolled over by Buttershy, who was also on Team Twilight.
Buttershy: Team Twilight *wheeze!* FOREVEEERRRRR!
Cutting back to Lumpy and Flippy, they were now speechless at the insanity that began to erupt just outside of Sweet Apple Acres.
Lumpy: Flippy?
Flippy: ...Yeah?
Lumpy: We are definitely fucked.
Flippy: So we are.
Lumpy: Yeah. *beat* RUUUUUUUN!
Flippy and Lumpy ran off like crazy, jumping over the fence to Sweet Apple Acres, where the other side of the storyline continued to develop.
(Next scene: Applejack's family's home)
Full of absolute frustration due to the constraints the bet between her, Spike and Rainbow Dash created over the last several hours, Twilight Sparkle made it to Applejack's, breaking through the door, and passing by Applejack and Apple Bloom along the way.
The unicorn finally found Rainbow Dash, who was just about to re-enter the guest room, or rather her (Rainbow's) room.
Twilight Sparkle: DASH!
Rainbow Dash: Ah, geez, you scared the shit out of me!
Twilight Sparkle: Look, Rainbow, I need you to tone down on the lust for a few moments and leave me be! I just-I just need to take a breather without you breathing down my neck!
Rainbow Dash: I do not think that will be easy.
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, what do you even mean? All you think about recently is romance!
Rainbow Dash: Tsk-tsk. Twilight, that is a true fact, but that doesn't explain how you'll probably not survive another day with me. And I don't want to let that happen. Or do I?
Twilight Sparkle: Wait, what?
Rainbow Dash: Well, I was just about to get back in my room. I was wondering if you could join me.
Twilight Sparkle: ...You really have a death wish, do you? I don't think I can stay in the same room with you right now without thinking of tearing you to shreds!
Rainbow Dash: That's not even graphic enough to make me flinch. Either you're joining or you're joining. No other choice, because I say so, and because I'm the man of this relationship!
Twilight Sparkle: You're not even a man!
Rainbow Dash: I don't need to be one!
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh! Alright, I'm getting a headache from this, so no need to annoy me further!
While laying another frustrated grunt down and kicking in a hole in one of the walls, Twilight just plain walked away from Rainbow Dash, definitely a bit enraged about this bet she got sucked into.
Rainbow Dash: Jeez, what's up her ass? Certainly not a bigass dildo, that's what I think. *enters her room*
(Next scene: Back at the Toon Hub)
Flippy and Lumpy were now in hide-out mode, as they carefully looked around to see if there were any Team Twilight Sparkle or Team Rainbow Dash people around. Luckily, there weren't, after moments of searching.
Lumpy: *sitting down at the big center table with Flippy* Alright, the coast is clear.
Flippy: This is all your fault, you know.
Lumpy: How is it my fault this was gonna happen?
Flippy: You spread the word! Everybody knows that when you tell one voice, a million more will listen. Look, I'm pretty sure more than half of the town has heard about this bet and are either on one side or another.
Lumpy: ...Oh my god, it is my fault.
Flippy: Duh!
Lumpy: Alright. We need to figure out how this can stop. ...Unless it can't.
Flippy: Well, that may be true. A riot that could break out could tear Toonville apart unless somebody does something. And by "somebody", I mean the both of us.
Lumpy: But the only way the bet will end is either if Twilight admits Rainbow Dash and that dragon kid are great together, or if Rainbow officially breaks up with the kid.
Flippy: And those are the only three people who are in full charge of this bet. You just count the money, and everybody else-
Principal Lewis: *running by Flippy and Lumpy* Team Rainbow forever, bitches!
Flippy: -is just fucking insane.
Lumpy: Well, this town is full of insanity, and we're the only ones who can stop the craze I created. And then they'll probably beat the shit out of us if we try.
Flippy: Yeah, you're probably right about that.
*beat*
Flippy: Well, any ideas, Lumpy?
Lumpy: ...We can always kill them all.
Flippy: That's stupid.
Lumpy: I know.
*beat*
Lumpy: Yeah, we should probably see what Twilight, Dash and that other kid are doing.
Flippy: That other kid's name is Spike.
Lumpy: That's his name?
Flippy: Oh, god. *facepalm*
(Next scene: Back at Sweet Apple Acres)
Fed up with her current dilemma and worn down by the bet, Twilight Sparkle was crying into Applejack's shoulders at her living room. Oh, and Apple Bloom was standing off to the side... for some reason.
Twilight Sparkle: I just don't know what to do, Applejack. If I admit defeat and let Rainbow and Spike stay together, I'll probably be an embarrassment. I seriously don't want my reputation in any further jeopardy. I'm at a dead end, and I have absolutely no idea how to get out. Tell me something! Anything to help make this go away!
Applejack: Uh, I'm no counselor, but haven't you tried making them lose?
Twilight Sparkle: Well *sniff* I could try that...
Applejack: *to herself* Well, that was easier than expected-
Twilight Sparkle: But wait. If they break up over this, both Rainbow and Spike among probably others may think I'm a terrible person, and I'll lose their friendship!
Applejack: ...You and Rainbow are still friends? I seem to remember her smacking you around in the past, both verbally and physically.
Twilight Sparkle: I can't say that's true.
Applejack: Look, Twi. I know you can pull through this. You can be able to make anything happen.
Apple Bloom: Yeah, just like me and the other Crusaders are trying our best to get our cutie marks!
After Bloom got a say in the situation, Applejack noticed something off about what she was wearing, which was a Team Twilight shirt.
Applejack: Apple Bloom, where did you get that shirt?
Apple Bloom: *throwing the shirt away* Uhhhh, nowhere?
Applejack: Anyways, if you got yourself into this, Twilight, you can probably be able to get yourself out. You just need to calm down and figure this out.
Twilight Sparkle: ...I don't think that will work at 100% this time. Can't you think of a plan?
Applejack: ...Can't you?
A second later, Spike came by, getting through the front door and meeting up with Twilight and Applejack. And Twilight wasn't very happy about his arrival.
Spike: Uh, am I interrupting anything?
Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, you have some nerve, Spike!
Applejack: Twilight! Don't hurt him! Calm down.
Twilight Sparkle: *inhales, then exhales* , while I do carefor you, this bet is all your fault. It's always been. I feel you should just leave me alone until this blows over.
Spike: Well, I just... wanted to see how it was going with Rainbow Dash.
Cue Rainbow Dash leaving her room to join the conversation. Speak of the devil.
Rainbow Dash: It's been actually slow at this moment. I mean, she doesn't want to sleep with me, and I'm pretty sure she's hoping Trixie isn't still crying her eyes out.
Twilight Sparkle: The reason I don't want to sleep with you is-*stops mid-sentence to think*
Applejack's voice in Twilight's mind: If you got yourself into this, Twilight, you can probably be able to get yourself out...
Twilight Sparkle: Wait... do you still want to sleep with me?
Rainbow Dash: *confused by the sudden change in emotion* Heh?
Spike: What's that now?
Applejack: Uh, Twi, are you thinking what I think you're thinking?
Twilight Sparkle: AJ, trust me on this. I have a plan.
Apple Bloom: A plan? *Twilight gives her a threatening stare* I heard nothing. *runs off*
Both Rainbow Dash and Spike were clueless about what Twilight was suddenly thinking, as the unicorn approached the pegasus with ease.
Twilight Sparkle: *with a tone of seductiveness in her voice* You know, sometimes I wonder what it's like sleeping with a wild pony like you. Know what I mean?
Rainbow Dash: Uh... I'm not following you.
Applejack: *whispering* Twilight, are you sure about this?
Twilight Sparkle: *whispering* I said *winks* trust me.
Applejack: *realizing* Oh, I see what's going on.
Rainbow Dash: Twilight, are you trying to hit on me? Because that's my job, and nopony steals from m-
Rainbow's attempt to bring Twilight down a notch was cut off by their lips pressing against each other in a sweet-and-sour embrace. The two ponies went down on the couch, as Applejack and Spike watched on with surprised eyes. Twilight harshly forced her tongue down Rainbow's mouth as she kept the two of them wrapped in a tight hold. While she could've tried to fight back, the charismatic flyer was temporarily caught off-guard by the faithful Canterlot student's sudden change in plans for the both of them. However, she managed to break free of Twilight's grip for a brief moment.
Rainbow Dash: Whoa, calm down, you little hard-boiled egg. Like I said, I'm the man of the relationship!
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, I understand that. I just think the man needs to be brought down a notch, and if you want to go down on me, I'm taking you along!
Hmm. Talk about a pre-sex one-liner. Oh, speaking of sex...
*From this line, until the stopping line just along the way, there will be some mature content. This show's not rated M for nothing! Well, except the mild use of cussing, especially "fuck".*
The hot action continued, as Twilight bit hard on one of Rainbow's ears, almost like she wanted to rip it out with just her mouth. Dash yelped in pain as she tried lowering herself down the purple unicorn's body, but she needed more power than that. As it forced her hand, Rainbow briefly socked Twilight on her right cheek, making her mouth open up in pain. The pegasus, while holding her now-bleeding ear, went down further and lifted Twilight up by her back legs, looking down at her blushing purple marehood.
Rainbow Dash: So you wanna play rough, huh? Fine. I'll play rough, and I'll make you tap out!
And so Rainbow Dash dropped her mouth right down on Twilight's pussy, eating her up with all her might. Twilight gripped onto the futon as she moaned, while trying to fight through the pleasure of having somebody lick up her vagina like a very flavorful pie. So, if Friendship is Magic, I wonder what sex could be? Bliss?
Spike and Applejack, on the other hand, watched with mouths agape as Rainbow swirled her tongue around Twilight's wet puss like ice cream.
Applejack: Spike?
Spike: Yeah?
Applejack: Are you seein' what I'm seein'?
Spike: Yeah... Go Rainbow Dash! Make her cum!
Applejack: Spike, don't encourage her!
Twilight Sparkle huffed and puffed as she tried bucking Rainbow Dash off her, as her spine curved up from the pegasus pinning her head and shoulders down and keeping her lower body up in the air while licking her up like crazy. Both of the ponies began to sweat hard, as their bright and colorful coats dripped with some mild wetness, and they both moaned in accepted arousal.
Rainbow Dash: Mmm... you like that, Twiley?
Twilight Sparkle: *panting* Only my brother calls me that.
Rainbow Dash: ...So what? Have you two done it? That's kinda creepy.
Twilight Sparkle: Shut! UP!
Twilight kicked up once again, and managed to bonk Rainbow Dash square in the face as the momentum changed, and now Twilight was on top of Rainbow.
Twilight Sparkle: Now who's the man?
Twilight lowered her right hoof down to Rainbow's cunt, which was as wet and swollen as Twilight's was right now. The unicorn felt Rainbow's vag up and down, left and right, forcing a groan from her. Looks like the bet was going to lead up to this no matter what was going to happen. Dash covered her mouth, trying to keep her sexually demanding moans in, so Twilight wouldn't get any ideas.
Twilight Sparkle: What's the matter? Afraid to let it out?
Rainbow Dash: Hnnng... you *gasp!* little bitch. You won't get the last laugh, you hear me?
After a little more time massaging Rainbow's genitalia, Twilight got an unusual idea on how to punish Rainbow, like she deserves. She stopped rubbing Dash off, and backed up some more so that Twilight's head was right near Rainbow's pussy. However, as she looked down, Rainbow noticed that Twilight's horn was only a couple of inches away from her slit, and realized that this may not be good.
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, Rainbow. You always knew how to shove things up inside yourself. Now let's see if you'll do the same for me and learn not to mess with the Element of Magic!
Right after that line, Twilight shoved her horn right up Rainbow's walls, making her gasp from the sharp pain. It was obvious that Twilight had sharpened her horn not a long while back. Twilight managed to pull out a few seconds later, and Rainbow was a bit scared to see some blood dripping out from her wet hole. The pain worsened almost immediately when Sparkle shoved the horn back in, and pulled out again, resulting in a rhythm of thrusting, as Dash tried hard not to faint, especially if she goes into shock from the increasing blood loss.
Rainbow Dash: Uh! Ah! Aah! Please! Stop! It! Hurts! Agh! AAH!
Twilight Sparkle: I'm not planning on stopping anytime soon. I'm enjoying seeing you take the pain!
Thrusting in and out, Rainbow Dash screamed in pleasure and mostly pain, as Twilight Sparkle continued to tear up her vagina in a way she never wanted. While she did want the pain in her nether regions to go away, Rainbow wanted to let her climax loose as soon as possible, just so Twilight could stop, or so she hoped. The mixed amount of pain and pleasure began to build up inside the cyan pegasus, as her moans and groans quickly turned into absolute screams and shrieks, proving that Dash was quite the screamer.
Rainbow Dash bit onto her hoof to muffle her screams, but the pain that overtook her caused her to bite down too hard, causing said hoof to bleed pretty quickly. As Twilight's horn continued to mash with her pussy, Rainbow kept her wings and legs spread open as she felt an orgasm pushing through. After just a few more thrusts from Twi's horn, the pegasus let free of her love juices...
...but Twilight still kept going. Blood mixed with Rainbow's white nectar as the unicorn kept her pace.
Rainbow Dash: Aah! Why! Won't! You! Stop!?
Twilight Sparkle: *moaning from pleasure* This-ugh!-is what-gah!-you... deserve! Besides-ah!-who's gonna stop me?
Suddenly, Twilight felt a sharp pain coming from her behind, as if something went up her ass, which something did. The horny pony (no pun intended) recoiled as she dared herself to turn around to see what entered her. Her eyes and head shifted to the side, as she was able to notice that Spike, her antagonistic companion, had his cock buried between her ass cheeks, and into her anus. She had almost forgotten how abnormally large the dragon's penis could get, as it clocked at almost 8 inches long, which, while not as long as a normal adult dick, is still very big for his age.
Twilight Sparkle: S-Spike! Guh! What are you-hnng!-doing?!
Spike: I'm sorry Twilight, but I'm not letting you get off this easy!
Applejack: *still watching the sexual interactions going down* This is insanity if I ever saw it.
Spike pulled his cock back until only the tip was inside Twilight, and forced it back in at full force, causing Twilight to buck her horn into Rainbow's entrance, as the situation made sure all three feel some pleasure. As Twilight and Rainbow panted for a moment, Spike continued to pump his hips forward, forcing Twilight's horn up Dash in this threesome. In this unique three-way, Twilight Sparkle found herself in the middle of the fire, as she was taking Spike's 8 inches up her ass, and her horn up Rainbow Dash's pummeled pussy. She was definitely in the middle of a field of pleasure, and needed to release it soon.
Twilight Sparkle: Ngh... oh sweet Celestia... please, you guys-ah! Make this st-stop!
Rainbow Dash: Ugh! The only way you can make this stop is if you admit it!
Twilight Sparkle: Never! I'll never say it!
Spike: Ah! She's right, you know! You're practically killing her, so you'll have to get out sometime!
Twilight Sparkle: But you're thrusting me into her! And I don't think it will matter if she dies! At least that way, I'll be out of this!
Spike: *thrusting faster* I'll-I'll make you break long before that happens!
As Spike prepared to let his member explode inside Twilight's ass, the tortured unicorn began to feel some magic build up inside her at the same time an orgasm began to form inside her nether regions, from the combined amount of sexual acts forming around her. Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, was beginning to tear up as she didn't want to take any more punishment now, since the increase in Spike's speed made Twilight drive her horn further into her. A pinkish glow formed around Twilight as she screamed in pain and arousal at the same time, and her eyes began to glow white. Uh-oh, this isn't good. She's gonna blow in more ways than one!
Twilight Sparkle: I...said...NO!
As Rainbow's clit clenched in another orgasm, and Spike busted his nut inside her, Twilight orgasmed from both her vagina and horn, and at the same time, unleashed a magic spasm that blasted Rainbow, Spike as well as the still-bystanding Applejack across the room.
As the smoke cleared, parts of the couch in which the threesome happened on were burnt up by purple flames, as Rainbow, AJ and Spike were all injured from the shockwave that resulted from the magical explosion. Twilight fell on the couch, nearly unconscious, as Rainbow's juices covered her horn and some of her head, and Spike's cum slowly oozed from her anus.
*The sexual content ends here.*
Rainbow Dash: Whoa. Maybe we may have gone too far.
Spike: I... ugh... guess you're right.
Applejack: *to both Rainbow and Spike* Of course she's right! The two of you practically raped her! Now look at her!
Rainbow Dash and Spike slowly approached Twilight, who was panting from the after-sex exhaustion. She definitely had almost everything taken out of her, as she laid down on the couch.
Rainbow Dash: T-Twilight? Look... this is our fault. We have definitely pushed you too far-
Spike: Dash... it isn't your fault. It's only mine. If you can hear me, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for doubting you, I'm sorry for the anal rape... and I guess I'm sorry for calling you a bitch.
Rainbow Dash: *comically missing the point* Wait, you called her a bitch?
Spike: Not the point. Besides... maybe me and Dash are still perfect together.
Twilight Sparkle: *opening an eye* No.
Spike: ...What?
Twilight Sparkle: *getting up on the couch* I said... no! I am not admiting that you are a perfect couple!
Spike: *gasps*
Rainbow Dash: Aw, you little egghead whore-
Twilight Sparkle: But... you two seem to belong together... and I can't take that away. So, you win. I quit. I'm done. Go ahead and kiss if you want, but just leave me out of it.
Rainbow Dash: *smiles* Wow. You really mean that?
Twilight Sparkle: *nods briefly, then twists a hoof a little, as in "so-so"*
Rainbow Dash: *outstretching arms/front legs* Oh, hug me, you egghead!
Twilight Sparkle: Please don't touch me.
Rainbow Dash: *stepping back* Okay.
When they least expected it, screams were heard coming from outside the house, followed quickly by Flippy and Lumpy barging in and closing the door as soon as possible.
Twilight Sparkle: Uhh, what was going on out there?
Lumpy: You. Do not. Want to know.
The murmuring of several dozen angry people rang through the ears of the 6 animal-like people in the room. Twilight looked out a window, and saw what seemed to be an equal number of people from Team Rainbow Dash and Team Twilight Sparkle having a bit of a war outside all around town. People were punching and kicking each other back and forth, others ran for cover, trying not to get killed, more people actually did die, and, for some reason, there was a huge-ass gorilla trashing up everything.
Twilight quickly covered the window up, and looked sternly at Lumpy and Flippy.
Flippy: ...It was all Lumpy. He started a betting pool, and then *referring to the fan war* that happened.
Rainbow Dash: Okay, to be fair, it is Lumpy's fault on that part, because I never knew about that.
Spike: Yeah, me neither.
Applejack: I actually knew it when it first started.
Twilight Sparkle: Well, whatever it is, I think we should probably stop it.
(Next scene: In the middle of Team Twilight vs. Team Rainbow)
Hell has officially broken loose in Toonville... again. People of all shapes, sizes, genders, races, species and age were having an all-out brawl for it all. The first seen piece of action outside of far shots of the battle was Peter Griffin, part of Team Twilight, was beating down on Team Rainbow member Bender of Futurama, with a headlock and punches to the face.
Peter Griffin: Say it! Say Twilight will win!
Bender: Ugh! Bite my ass!
Bender then speared Peter to the grass. Passing by them, Principal Lewis was trying to tame Buttershy like a horse (and like an actual horse). Buttershy was hopping around like a bull in a rodeo, trying to shove Lewis off her back.
Principal Lewis: Keep your flab off me, you damn dirty pony!
Buttershy: Movie references bad for health!
Pan to Ian of Smosh, who was beating down on an unnamed human member of Team Twilight with his shotgum.
Ian: *whack!* This is for Rainbow Dash! *whack!* This is for being 20% cooler! *whack!* This is for swag! *whack!* And this is for... another Rainbow Dash meme! *whack!*
Lumpy, Flippy, Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Spike and Applejack were watching the battle continue from not very far away.
Lumpy: Oh my god, it's like a slaughter house out here!
Flippy: Oh man, what the hell do we even do to stop this and make them listen?!
Twilight Sparkle: Hmmmmm... I got it! Does anybody have a megaphone?
Lumpy: *pulling out a megaphone* Well, I don't mean to brag, but-*Twilight snatches the megaphone away with her magic* Hey, that's expensive!
Flippy: You bought that for 45 bucks. How-how is that expensive?
The nearby set of characters covered their ears as Twilight set off the siren that was built into the megaphone, causing all action to come to a complete halt.
Twilight Sparkle: May I have your attention please? Thank you. As you may have obviously known, I was dared by my not entirely loyal assistant Spike to become Rainbow Dash's lover, and that the only ways for me to get out of this was to either admit they belonged together or if they decide to break up.
Principal Lewis: We've already heard that part! Who won?!
Twilight Sparkle: Well... even though this will upset most of you, I have to reveal that I have forfeited the competition in favor for Spike and Rainbow's victory.
Half of the the groaned in defeat, as the other half rose up in triumph.
Ian: Yes! We did it!
Principal Lewis: *to unnamed Team Twilight person* I told you Twilight would snap! Hell yeah!
Buttershy: *hog-tied* ...Daaamn.
Twilight Sparkle: But... and there is a "but" attached to this...
Spike: *to Applejack* A butt that I came inside...
Applejack: Grow up, will ya?!
Twilight Sparkle: It wasn't because they pushed me over the edge... although that is part of the reason... it was because they pushed me too far and realized their mistakes. So, I gave them the victory, as an apology. To be honest, when Spike fucked me while I horn-fucked Rainbow... *people begin murmuring* ...I saw the teamwork it took to drive me over, and, as far as I know, teamwork is a sign of good friendship and good romance.
Flippy: And that's going into The Guide. Although I have to scratch out the horn-fucking part, that's kind of explicit.
Lumpy: *carrying a bucket full of all of the money he got from the betting pool* ...So, am I going to be dumping the money out yet?
Flippy: Eh, go nuts.
Lumpy: Aw yeah! I'm gonna make it rain!
The cyan moose did a running start before tossing the bucket into the air like a shot put, and letting the money fly out. The crowd (even Team Twilight) quickly went to snatch their money back.
Soon enough, Rainbow Dash and Spike approached Twilight.
Rainbow Dash: So, since you accepted us as a good pair, can we be able to make out where we stand?
Twilight Sparkle: ...Eh, why not?
And just in a matter of milliseconds, Rainbow and Spike locked lips again and fell to the grass. Flippy, Twilight, Lumpy and Applejack looked over them.
Lumpy: Aw, look at them go to town on their mouths.
*beat; Rainbow moaning can be heard seconds later*
Lumpy: Wait, are-are they wrestling or something?
Flippy: *eyes widening* ...That's not wrestling.
Applejack: The hell it ain't.
Twilight Sparkle: We... should probably leave them alone... for a bit.
Soon enough, the four friends left the lovely pony/dragon couple to do their dirty business, and everybody lived happily ever after... for this episode.
End episode.
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[1] Since the My Little Pony characters believe in Celestia, and have also known about our God, they say "gods" in reference to both God and Celestia.
[2] Remember, due to an incident in 2012, Rainbow Dash is now living with Applejack and some of her family.
[3] A reference to a moment in WWE where then-commentator CM Punk said something like this when John Cena destroyed a commentary table. I think it was around when Nexus ruled 2010.
[4] Another continuity nod to the first episode of this season.
[5] I got this scene from Workaholics stuck in my head where Adam got stabbed in the head with a button that looks like a penis cut out of construction paper during the opening scene of the Valentines Day episode.
[6] No-sell: Not being damaged by something in "kayfabe" wrestling. Can also be used in terms of injury underreactions.
[7] A describing of Sub-Zero's infamous Spine Rip fatality in the aformentioned Mortal Kombat.
[8] A callback to the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic episode Magic Duel, where Trixie first used "Great and Apologetic".
[9] The people I'm talking about (Jacob and Edward) are from the Twilight Saga film series.
[10] Creddie and Seddie are shippings from iCarly.
Creddie: Carly and Freddie.
Seddie: Sam and Freddie.
[11] Hammerspace is the unlimited space in which any kinds of items can be pulled out of. Also known as "nowhere".
Voice credits:
Tara Strong - Twilight Sparkle (MLP:FiM)
Ashleigh Bell - Rainbow Dash, Applejack (MLP:FiM)
Cathy Weseluck - Spike (MLP:FiM)
Jerry Trainor - Lumpy (HTF), Buttershy (MLP:FiM/Original)
Nathan Kress - Flippy (HTF)
Seth MacFarlane - Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin (Family Guy), second unnamed citizen
Andrea Libman - Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy (MLP:FiM)
Tabitha St. Germain - Rarity (MLP:FiM)
Kevin Michael Richardson - Principal Lewis (American Dad!)
Anthony Padilla (Smosh) - Himself
Ian Hecox (Smosh) - Himself
Michelle Creber - Apple Bloom (MLP:FiM)
John DiMaggio - Bender (Futurama)
Kathleen Barr - Trixie (MLP:FiM)
J.G. Quintel - Mordecai (Regular Show)
William Salyers - Rigby (Regular Show)
Seth Green - First and third unnamed citizens
Sometimes it's hard doing sex scenes, especially ones featuring My Little Pony, because there's a lot of negative response to clopping. Hmm, I wonder what CharlieHarperFan thinks of the sex scene, if I did almost as good as him. It's not likely, considering CHF88's sex scenes are quite detailed. This was also a pretty weird combination of romance and grimdarkness, as I barely do dramatic/tortureous pieces.
Thanks for everybody who's read this episode and the previous ones so far! Already 100 views! I hope we break 1000 before summer starts again!