He Is We
GREEDY
Have we been ruthlessly slaughtered yet?
Not yet…
And that means?
They're lying in wait.
Greedy wanted to smash his head into a wall. As it was, he was busy smurfing up dinner and currently had his hands full.
Bit paranoid, aren't we?
Will you still smurf it paranoia if it's founded?
If it's founded no. This isn't smurfing very founded.
Maybe not. Still, it's hard. My first instinct is to jump to the offensive.
He hummed a bit at that as he checked on the porridge. Nope, not sweet enough. As Greedy added some more sugar, he wondered if he was smurfing this too calmly. Most would've been a bit more smurfed at having someone else in their head.
Then again, this other was no longer trying to take control of his body to smurf the life out of his family, so it was more of a nice acquaintance by now than a threat.
Don't forget to smurf the rolls.
And it was nice to smurf some help in the kitchen, even if it was all mental. And honestly, Greedy needed all the help he could smurf. With everyone else smurfing hard, that meant they expected and needed three filling meals. It was more than the usual hundred too, with Marco, Timber, and Pansy staying to help around the village.
Not that that wasn't nice of them, but that also meant more pressure for the only cook in the village.
They don't smurf too crispy.
Which also meant that it was even more of a hassle than usual. Several times already he'd almost smurfed some stew to bake and a few cakes to simmer in a pot.
So that's the rolls, the soup, the stew, the smurfberries, the salads, what's left?
Is the porridge supposed to still be smurfing?
Right. Oh, smurf it!
Greedy rushed over and moved the porridge over to cool. After a test taste he frowned.
Still not sweet enough?
Still not sweet enough.
He smurfed on to moving all the finished food to the mess hall. Most Smurfs were still out working on the last touchups for the village, but a few had already finished for the day.
Brainy and Clumsy, for instance, had finished another day of smurfing out in the fields. As frustrating as it was to smurf that those two were at fault for the whole debacle, that didn't dull or overshadow that the two had made an innocent mistake.
"Hiya Greedy!" Besides, it was hard to smurf mad at someone who could still manage to smile and be cheery after a hard day's work. Even Brainy, who was grumbling and looked ready to smurf dead, was hard to stay mad at when Greedy remembered that anyone could've easily made the mistake they did.
"Hi Clumsy, hi Brainy." He set down the salad he was currently carrying as well as the basket of rolls. It was with a fond smile he smurfed back to the kitchen. They really hadn't meant any harm. Clumsy wouldn't even smurf a fly if he had a chance not to.
It was a stretch to smurf that no one had been hurt, though. Pansy had smurfed well after a few potions and spells, as had Puppy, but that didn't mean taking them was painless. Puppy alone had howled loud enough that Greedy was sure even Gargamel could smurf it.
I smurfed up badly there, I know.
We both did, I smurf.
Maybe. It seemed much more justified when I saw them as threats and creatures that wanted to smurf.
Greedy's smile faded completely at that. Well, that had been terrifying for all involved and he was directly responsible.
Shouldn't he be smurfing the other food out? Yeah, he had other things to do instead of dwell on that… Right.
Next he smurfed out the stew and soup, which thankfully didn't tip and spill on anysmurf. More were starting to come in which meant he'd have to pick up the pace and-
The porridge?
Smurf!
Which, by the way, still wasn't sweet enough. Oh well, it wasn't like the others would starve if it took a bit longer.
Greedy snatched a cupcake as he took out the fruits. Now almost everysmurf had showed up and he still hadn't gotten everything out.
There's not much left, it's really just the porridge.
The porridge that wouldn't smurf right no matter how much he tried to smurf it. Maybe Greedy was feeling a little frazzled, but he decided enough was enough and that porridge was going to get out of the kitchen now, come smurf or high water, so help him…
…Which one of us is the violent one again?
He smurfed the porridge onto the table with perhaps a bit more force than necessary.
"A bit"? I haven't been fully conscious long, but I can't recall ever seeing the table shake like that before.
Today was the last crazy day for everyone, hopefully, so he smurfed peace in knowing he wouldn't have to smurf this again, at least not for a while.
Nosey started, for whatever reason, crowing and making a big deal about whatever he had overheard. It was times like this Greedy smurfed being at a table right next to his.
"Jokey smurfed what?" Oh, this wasn't good. Reporter was getting interested. "Are you sure about that?"
Them I wouldn't have minded smurfing to the ground.
Not that Greedy enjoyed the thought, but he could agree with it. When those two got interested in something, it meant trouble for everyone involved. Poor Jokey.
Just when he thought maybe the recent chaos would've deterred any other gossips from getting interested, it seemed all it did was smurf them more ready and eager for trouble. Anything to get their minds off of it, he supposed. Really, though?
Greedy flinched as he looked over a few tables at Jokey, whose head was in his hands. They really didn't need to smurf others into this insanity, did they?
I could always-
No.
As interesting as that would be, there'd been more than enough violence. So Reporter and Nosey were conspiring again and making rumors, so what? Everyone'd move on soon, and Jokey wasn't the type to let something like this smurf under his skin.
Still… While he wasn't going to take the violent approach…
Greedy smurfed up and walked over to Nosey and Reporter's table. He bent down and whispered a certain something in Reporter's ear that actually managed to make him freeze for a second.
By the time Greedy sat back down, the subject had "miraculously" changed to what they thought the red eyed creature was smurfing and how, as well as if, Mother Nature had punished it.
What did you smurf by "Squawk?", and how in the world did it actually work?
Nothing much, I was lucky that it even worked.
It didn't smurf long after that for Smurfs to clear out and head for bed.
Greedy smurfed to do the same, but before he could someone tapped him on the shoulder.
He turned around to come face to face with a scowling Reporter.
NOW may I-
No.
"You need something, Reporter?" The scowl deepened. This wasn't going to be good.
"I just wanted to know what you were smurfing to accomplish there." There was enough sarcasm in that sentence to drown a cat.
"Jokey's not the only one who's smurfed strangely recently, and do you really want to smurf salt into that wound?" Reporter twitched, slightly.
"Fine, fine." He started walking away, muttering something under his breath.
Greedy turned to finish clearing up the left over dishes when Reporter decided to get the last word in.
"Greedy?" He turned. "The porridge was rather sweet tonight. Were you smurfing for someone to choke?"
Now Greedy twitched.