Chapter 3

Dipper had slowly recovered throughout the day and by lunch his head only hurt half as much as it did an hour ago. The employees of the Mystery Shack also had a plan of action ready if Bill decided to try and take the world over again. But none of them quite knew what Bill was planning, so it was uncertain at best.

"You know, these kind of days make me wish Grunkle Ford was here. He would know exactly what to do and how," Dipper sighed, thinking of the good days, right before Weirdmaggedon, where he and Ford would sit and play D&D & more D all day or maybe research the strange things that happened.

"Well, at least we have half of Fiddleford back. He can probably help us if we're close to dying via Bill," Wendy pointed out, not really sharing the fond memories of Ford.

"Dude... What was even up with him?" Soos asked, his mouth full of infinity pizza. Melody whispered something to him. "Oh, right, he was shot with that memory gun to many times! That's crazy... Just think. It could randomly happen to you or me. Any day of the week!" Soos laughed.

"That's it! We can ask Filddleford to make us a one -use disposable memory gun!" Dipper nearly yelled, feeling light and hopeful for the first time since he saw Bill this year.

"Are you sure that's a good idea, Dipstick?" Mabel asked, hanging from the ceiling of the kitchen.

"Well... no. But It's the best idea if we want to plan ahead at all. If you're worried, I'll forget it," Dipper responded, not wanting her to feel like last summer.

"No, no. It's a good idea. But what about school? You'd forget everything you ever learned. You'd almost have relearn everything over the weekend," Mabel pointed out, swinging down from the ceiling and landing on the table with a loud thunk.

"I can do that, if it means killing Bill again!" Dipper felt as determined as he had in his dream with the void.

"Let's go!" Mabel agreed, forgetting about the glitter glue gummy bear sandwiches she had lovingly prepared for the four of them that didn't have pizza.

They arrived at Fiddleford's new home, the Northwest Mansion. Mabel run up the long, winding sidewalk to the front door and jammed at the doorbell, making sure it was rung. Dipper trailed after her, thinking the coming social interaction through.

"Dipper, he's not answering!" Mabel shouted from the porch, worry lining her voice.

"Maybe he's out?" Dipper asked her, finally reaching the porch and panting at the long walk.

"Well let's come back tomorrow, after school," Mabel said, looking like it was more to check on him than anything else.

Sunday passed and soon the twins were back at school. Dipper was tired though, and he couldn't seem to focus on anything but Bill. Bill had come back in his dreams last night and their conversation was sort of disconcerting, mainly because Bill was not himself. Dipper had had a chance to look up his dream in a dictionary, plus ask Gideon if he knew anything. But Bill didn't want the answer anymore. He said so himself. He just looked... sad. Dipper was reasonably sure that floating isosceles monsters didn't get sad, but maybe Bill-

"Mr. Pines! Are you listening!?" Their teacher yelled in his ear.

"Wha- reality is an illusion?!" Dipper jerked out of his reverie just in time to hear himself say that to the man standing over him. Mabel gave him a 'sorry' look.

"Maybe as your punishment for not listening you can do a paper on the history of Gravity Falls? or perhaps you shall write a 10 page long paper on your proof that reality is, in fact, an illusion? It shall be due... in a week. You know what, I will be nice, and let you chose. The history of Gravity Falls or your proof that reality isn't real. Which one?" He said through gritted teeth, obviously not feeling very nice at the moment.

"I think I'll take the history of Gravity Falls, please and thank you, um, sir," Dipper stuttered, having trouble speaking currently, due to the aggressive teacher standing over him. Luckily he had a clear enough mind to not chose the one that would entail talking to Bill to prove his point without revealing anything... otherplaner.

Other than that slightly frightening encounter with his history teacher, the rest of Dipper's day was as normal as you can get with a demon haunting your head, a friend of your grunkel's who may be missing or fond of grocery shopping on Sundays, and a Mabel as your twin, all contained within Gravity Falls.

As soon as he and Mabel were both home, they immediately set of to find out the fate of Fiddleford.

Mabel ran up the walk again, far ahead of Dipper. She rang the doorbell, pressing it too hard again. No answer.

"Dipper, there's still no answer!" She screamed from the walk.

Dipper began to run up the sidewalk, and was totally winded by the time he got up there. "Maybe the doorbells broken? Try knocking..." he managed to gasp out as he collapsed in a heap on the doormat. Mabel knocked too hard, in typical Mabel fashion. The door creaked and fell, but no one on the other side opened it. It just kind of tipped over.

"Oh my God, Mabel, you just knocked the door down. Literally. I honestly had no idea that much enthusiasm was possible for someone so small," Dipper said, having regained his breath and footing by now.

"But look inside..." Mabel trailed off.

The inside of Fiddleford's house was completely trashed. There was graffiti on the walls written in what looked like blood, the many bookshelves were all on the floor with their precious books everywhere, ripped to shreds. The various couches and chairs, all plush, were torn apart like paper. It was dark inside because all the lamps and other lights had been shattered, their glass strewn across the floor which made it dangerous to walk anywhere. Dipper tiptoed carefully around the mess that was the lobby, scared of stepping on glass despite having shoes on.

"Mabel, you might want to come see this..." Dipper said, looking at nonsensical letters splattered on the wall in what could be blood. Or ketchup.

"Whoa, what does it say bro-bro?" Mabel asked.

"I have no idea. I think Bill must have something to do with it though. How much of a coincidence is it that Fiddleford, an old, half-insane man, got kidnapped right when we needed him and the other two people who know how to defeat Bill are untouchable?" Dipper exclaimed, angry at Bill for the supposed kidnapping and Ford and Stan for being gone. "Now we have no way to defeat Bill!" Dipper yelled, unable to control his hopelessness, which manifests itself in rage.

"Come on, be happy, we'll find a way. We did last time, we will again," Mabel said, feeling the despondency flowing off her beloved brother in waves of uncertain sadness.

Dipper sighed, sitting down on the floor. "What are we supposed to do if we get attacked, though? If we give up, the world, no, the universe all the dimensions, every plane, everything and everyone will suffer. And Bill's much too powerful just to punch and hope he dies."

"You know..." Mabel started, knowing she was about to say something crazy, but people expect that of her. "What if you try to make friends, or at least allies with him? He seems kinda obsessed with you anyway. Like he's in love or something," Mabel giggled, at the thought of Dipper and Bill kissing.

"What the Hell? Mabel that is... so, so you. It's so Mabellecent, I thought you would explode before you reached this level of you," Dipper said, laughing for a moment before realizing what she was talking about. "Wait, you want me to pretend to fall in love with a demon?"

"Yes! It's perfect! He'll never see it coming!" She laughed some more.

"Wait, he's a he. Shouldn't you do this?" Dipper was extremely confused, thinking about how romance worked in California.

"He's gay," Mabel explained, like it was the most obvious thing in the dimension. When Dipper began to ask how exactly she knew, she simply said, "Don't ask."

The sunset outside turning to darkness that seemed to get deeper every passing minute, so the twin Pines started home. Gravity Falls is a different place after sundown. It seems more foreboding, and the wind seems to whisper raspy secrets in your ear. The trees surrounding the town almost reach down far enough to catch you in their branches, and the street looks like it could swallow you up without making a sound.

Dipper went to sleep that night, not expecting Bill to be waiting for him of all things. It shouldn't have been so surprising.

Today it was a field of deep green roses. Always roses. He still had the same red one in his hands though. It had grown thorns. They didn't prick him, though. Bill floated up to him, looking more Billish today than he had the past few times Dipper had seen him.

"Heeeey! Pine Tree! Nice to see you again! Sorry for the past dream or two. I've been letting my job get in the way of torturing my Pine Tree," Bill said, sounding far more upbeat than last time.

"Hi Bill."

"Now about that information..."

"Right Bill. The dream, according to our local expert, Gideon, means we need to spend a lot more time together because our relationship is suffering due to personal insecurities and problems," Dipper explained. He almost laughed.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Bill laughed for a while, but eventually got control of himself. "Did you tell him it was me?" Bill asked, understandably confused but not unwilling.

"No. But maybe it's a good idea. They say know your enemies," Dipper pointed out, trying to go along with Mabel's plan.

"Oh! That reminds meeeeee... I have something you want," Bill said in a singsong voice, teasing Dipper.

"Do you have Fiddleford?!" Dipper shouted, all thoughts flying from his mind.

"Why, Pine Tree, I do so happen to have a man named Fiddleford MuGucket in my possession... Why are you asking?"

"I was just curious... How long can you force me to dream?" Dipper asked, trying to change the subject.

"Forever, as long as I don't get injured or killed in any way, and you don't die,"

"You know, sometimes I really like spending nights here with you. It's so... freeing," Dipper figured he was lying. But he almost felt like it was true. "When things are calm like this and you're not trying to kill me or my friends, it's kinda nice," He thought he was just going along with Mabel's plan. That's all. If that's all then why was there a burning in his chest? A terrible pain filled him, and though it was pain it defied the laws of pain by not being truly hurtful. Dipper shivered.

"Well, I like knowing you enjoy the company of a sadist. There are less people than you'd think who like hanging out with me," there was almost note of sadness in his voice, hidden by a joking tone. Maybe, Dipper thought, just maybe under all that evil, there is a little bit of emotion. Just maybe.

"Hey Pine Tree, watcha thinkin' about there?" Bill broke him out of his speculations with an obnoxcius growl.

"Hmm... nothing. You can see what I'm thinking about can't you?"

"Not while I'm in your dream,"

They just sort of laid there for a while, not really talking, just sort of... there. It was so peaceful and bordering on intimate. They were so close to touching, but to far away to do anything about it. It was very nearly pleasant.

"Hey Bill?" Dipper finally spoke.

"Yeah Pine Tree?"

"Can you turn into a human?"

"Yes. With very, very powerful magic. I wouldn't really be a human, per se, but I could sort of transmute myself into a humanoid,"

"Wait, wait. Let me write this down," He willed a notebook and pen into existence, and began scribbling feverishly.

Bill laughed softly. It was almost kind, very nearly sweet. At least to Dipper. "You are so much like Sixer. But he's not here now is he? I never see his mind anymore," Bill's voice had a joyful edge to it, like he was happy, so happy that Ford wasn't here.

"Can you be a humanoid here?" Dipper asked, his hand at the ready to write anything down.

"Well, yes... I can, but it wouldn't have any real effect on my form if you were to summon me. I would still end up looking like a classy nacho," Bill said, thinking if he could somehow trick the universe into making him a humanoid. As Dipper began to laugh, Bill replied "I know what I look like, okay?!" But he was laughing to, in his obnoxious way.

"Can you do it now?" Dipper asked, nervously excited to try to carry out Mabel's plan, being pretty sure he couldn't sweet talk a triangle.

"Okay..." Bill's voice faded away with his body as it slowly was replaced by a human shape, slowly filled in. The now about 14 year-old boy that replaced Bill had flowing, curly, shoulder length golden hair and and eye patch over one of his yellow eyes. He smiled with every single one of his teeth, plus his gums. He had a velvet black bowtie on with gold dress clothes and a black vest and loafers. He flipped his hair and for a moment after sparks flew everywhere. "Do you like it?"

"Oh... Bill... Wow..." Dipper tried not to be amazed. But, then again, Bill was trying to be amazing. "You are beautiful..."

"Why thank you, Pine Tree,"

Suddenly a huge wind knocked Dipper over, making him fly up into the air, straight into Bill's chest, which knocked Bill into the ground. Dipper, now on top of Bill, realized just how close their lips were. Bill realized this fact first and put his hands around Dipper's neck, leaned in and...

"WAKE UP!" Mabel was in his face in Bill's place, and she was yelling. In his ear. "BRO ARE YOU DEAD?! WHY WON'T YOU WA- oh you're up. We're gonna be late for school if you don't hurry up," Mabel abruptly stopped screaming and walked out, presumably to go get breakfast.

And Dipper's school day began again.