As some of you like a sob story and this part was written I thought I would post it. Keep commenting and I will keep writing.

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2004

Merlin was eight when his new mother died after becoming ill once more, probably from the conditions they worked in and the lack of food. Like the rest of the dump workers they both became ill every few months from the toxic fumes or the food they ate. As she died she handed him the locket she had worn round her neck since she had found him, saying as she did "Take this my child, never part with it, one day it might be your ticket away from his life, it came to me from the skies when the gods gave you back to me. You have been a blessing to me I love you my son."

"I love you mama" the small boy said to his only friend. "What do you mean Mama?" Merlin asked her but it was too late she was gone. Even at his young age he knew death when he saw it, it was a common site in the slums with over a third of the babies born dying before their second birthday and most adults dying by fifty.

He sat with Amata until the next morning when a neighbour came in and found the boy with his dead mama. She turned to the boy "You must leave, this shack can go to a family, I will see her body cared for but say goodbye and go, you will have to live on the streets now, we cannot afford to take you in." she gave Merlin a few minutes to say goodbye and chased him off. Life was cheap and hard in the slums and no one could afford another mouth to feed, even if Merlin worked, he was a cripple and would be more trouble than he was worth. The woman felt a twinge of regret as she knew the boy would have a hard life, but her family all worked at the dump or collecting rubbish from the better part of town. They had little for themselves so she hardened her heart as she watched him leave.

So Merlin left his home for the final time and carried with him his few clothes and the locket, as he left he grabbed the small amount of food from the corner and walked away. When he got to the streets where he knew the street children lived, he tried to find somewhere to stay but was chased of as each group defended their patch. In the end he found a small area and sat down and cried. As he cried he knew he now had to look after himself. So he sorted through his things and put on as many of the clothes as he could, knowing if he left them anywhere they would be gone. He tied the string holding the locket round his waist so it was hidden by this trousers and walked to the dump, eating his meagre amount of food as he went.

He worked alone all day and took his day's work to the man who had always paid his mother. "Where is your mama boy" he was asked gruffly.

"She is dead" came the sad retort

"I will pay you, but not as much as I paid your mama" with that he handed over a few rupees. "No arguing or you get nothing"

Merlin took it and left and went to a nearby market to buy some food. As he sat eating it a group of street children came and snatched it off of him and ran of shouting "Gora, you are on your own now"

Merlin realised then just how much protection his mama had been, she had truly loved him. The thought back to when they had first arrived in Mumbai, when he had tried begging. But in a country where some parents maimed their children deliberately his deformities weren't enough to attract money. So he had worked the dumps with his mama, she had always been there for him, but now he was alone, and he had no choice but to sleep on the pavements where at least he had the company of other boys in the same predicament, he just needed to find a group that would allow then to join them. He vowed to work hard and save of he could so he could return to the mountains.

Over the next few years his life remained one of hard work and semi starvation. He was so dirty that hardly anyone noticed his pale skin anymore, even though he was out in the sun all day he hardly tanned. But to everyone he was just another street kid. No matter how hungry he got, he never parted with the locket, Amata had kept it and so would he it was all he had to call his own. Merlin hid the locket well frightened it would be stolen, he wrapped it in rag so no one would notice it shine if his clothes moved. He tried to save, but soon found if he kept money someone would steal it from him, so like the others he spent his money as soon as he got it. Mostly on food and sometimes he crept into see a film. He was still alone most of the time, the others tolerating him, but not allowing him to be part of their groups so he lived on the fringe of the groups so he got some protection. Like the others Merlin would wash in the drains near the dump with the other kids occasionally he would go to the river. He did his best to keep clean.

By ten Merlin kept an eye out for some of the younger children as they first arrived, trying to help them if he could. They formed a small group who lived on the same patch of the street, and did their best to look out for each other, although it wasn't always possible. Many moved into the larger groups when they found one to take them. Merlin eventually found a friend, another boy just a bit older than him, but after a year the other boy died as rubbish at the dump collapsed on top of him burying him alive, Merlin and the others tried to find him, but in the end they had to leave his body. Others in the small group died from the bugs they picked up, others got run over by the trucks on site. Still more drifted into prostitution or working for the gangs. But if one of them was not able to work through illness the others would help get them food. The winters were the hardest, they wore all the clothes they could find and brought cardboard back from the dump the lie on and cover themselves with. They did their best to find places to hide their blankets when they worked or they would be stolen, or removed by the police as they tried to clear the street kids away from an area.

2004 ENGLAND

Gwaine was now twelve years old and Mordred was four. Gwaine tried to care for his brother and he did love him, but it was almost as if he was afraid to become too close to him in case he to left him. But Mordred was far happier with the ten year old Morgana the two had remained very close. Mordred had Merlin's colouring and in some ways that had made Gwaine's grief for Merlin worse. He would see his dead brother in the youngster every day. He would often get out the dragon and hug it, he thought no one else knew about it but of course Ygraine and Uther knew. Gwaine was a bright boy but his anger at the world meant he was constantly getting into fights and caused clashes with Uther, who tried his best to help the lad. He could see Balinor in the child and knew that he had it in him to change. They encouraged Arthur to try to keep his foster brother out of trouble and were please to notice that Arthur was becoming quite the diplomat.

Mordred of course remembered nothing of his other brother and parents, although Ygraine was careful to tell him about them and he had photos in his room. He was a happy boy and had many of Merlin's ways in that he was always smiling, but he also had his father's stubbornness a trait he shared with Gwaine. He also held grudges, something Merlin had never done even at four years old he was quick to forget any disagreements.

On the fourth anniversary of his families death Gwaine had taken a bottle of whiskey from Uther's study, and hid himself away and started to drink. He had always refused to visit the grave with Uther saying he didn't need to go to see a piece of ground to remember them. Arthur found Gwaine when he had drunk half the bottle and was almost unconscious. Ygraine had called an ambulance and got him to hospital. When Uther got back from Essetir it was to find Gwaine in ITU. It seemed Gwaine had been drinking regularly and the anniversary had triggered the major binge. As soon as the teenager was awake Uther and Ygraine insisted he see a counsellor for help. They all knew Gwaine had many issues to overcome before he would be well. But hoped that they could help the teenager cope better. He had become skilful at hiding his emotions under a cloak of devil may care, but he was a badly damaged young man who was shouting out for help, but at the same time refusing all attempts to help him. The counselling sessions helped but nothing could fill the gap in Gwaine's heart.