Chapter 4 revised 2,200-2,800 words... not a big revision but I like it a lot better and it is more flowly and more dramatic.

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST

WARNING: THIS IS RATED M FOR SEXUAL CONTENT AND LANGUAGETHIS IS ALSO YAOI

enjoy! ^_^

Roy woke up for the zillionth time that night. This time however when he looked toward the window, he knew he was not going to get anymore sleep. The sun was just rising. The sky was becoming light blue. He couldn't see the sun yet, but he knew it was going to arise over the horizon soon. He was grateful that his bundle of sun was still wrapped in his arms. He still did not know what he was going to say to Ed.

He was scared as to why Edward cried. He was afraid that Edward wanted to break up with him. He did not think he could do it. He felt way too deeply for the boy. Hell he loved the boy. Edward was the first person he has ever told that he loved them. Well besides his family, but he didn't count them. No his love for Edward was much different than the way he loved his mother or father. His love for Edward was strong. He felt that every time he looked at the boy his heart was going to leap out of his chest.

When he talked to Ed, he always got mixed up. He always lost his words. He always blurted stupid stuff when trying to be romantic, and that is when Edward is happy. So how was he supposed to confront his lover who cried? He didn't even know why Edward cried in the first place. He always thought their relationship was perfect.

Throughout his sleepless night, Roy had predicted many reasons as to why Edward could have cried. First he thought they were tears of joy, but he canceled that thought out when he realized that Edward waited for him to fall asleep before he cried. Then he came up with the thought that maybe he hurt him during all the sex they had. They had never had that much sex before in one night. While coming to that conclusion, Roy remembered back to when he woke up before Ed and he saw the tear stain marks on Ed's face and how weird Edward acted when he came down. That is when he canceled that thought out. That is when the thought he kept squashing came up front, Edward hated having sex with him. With all the thinking last night Roy came up this was the most painful one to think about. It also sounded the most logical. The one time he woke up before Edward, he saw tear stain cheeks. Now he stays up later then Edward and hears him cry himself to sleep. Both of these time happened right after they had sex. It was the only explanation. The real reason he came to the conclusion was because of yesterday. Throughout the day, Edward seemed like he was having an amazing time. He didn't start crying until after they finished their sexathon.

But now that he discovered that, Roy had a ton of new questions that went through his mind. They all revolved around the question, 'why would Ed hate having sex with me that he would cry every night, but not tell me?'

Roy couldn't think much more about it because just then the little bundle of blond started stirring in his arms. 'Shit well here it goes.'

"Morning Edward."

He felt Edward tense then watched him roll over on to his stomach.

"Come on Ed, I know you are awake and we have to talk."

Now Edward was beyond freaked out. He might not have been in a relationship before, but he was pretty sure that when your partner says 'we need to talk' that means they want to break up. Edward didn't want to break up. He loved Roy. They couldn't break up. 'Why does Roy want to break up?' Ed thought to himself. The logical voice in his head responded, 'He never said he wanted to break up you idiot.' Edward knew it was true. He knew he was jumping to conclusions, but what was he supposed to think.

Ed rubbed his eyes on the pillow and looked up to Roy who was sitting next to him. His face did not seem happy. 'Maybe he was been waiting for me to wake up so he could kick me out?' Ed got nervous and started to think of any way to convince Roy to keep him. Edward looked down to his body and got an idea. He sat up and leaned to Roy's lips for a kiss.

Roy kissed back hesitantly. He let it go on for a little while until he felt Edward's tense and shaky hand on his cock. Only then did he pull away. Even though he broke the kiss Edward did not take his hand away from Roy's member.

Knowing this wasn't the time for a hand job, Roy grabbed Edward's wrist and pulled it away from his dick. Edward looked up into Roy's eyes frantically and confused.

Roy with his free hand licked his thumb and wiped away a stained tear mark. Realizing what Roy had done, Edward's came to a realization and his eyes got huge.

"Y-you… y-you-"

"Yes Edward I saw, and I want answers. Why do you cry?"

Edward shook his head frantically, again trying to lean in for a kiss. This time Roy had stopped him. "Edward I am serious I want to know why you cry. I don't like seeing it."

"I-it is nothing."

"Do not lie Ed. I can tell. Look, you are starting to tear up already."

Edward reached for his face and sure enough the traitorous tears were already starting to gather on the rim of his eyes.

"Listen Edward, I have known you for a long time and not once have I seen you cry. Now that we are dating I have seen it twice, and I don't believe that I just conveniently had seen the only two times you cried. No I am guessing you have cried a lot more than just two times." When Edward did not say anything, Roy took it as an affirmative. "What is wrong Edward? Do you not want to be with me? Is that it? Am I forcing you to date me-"

"NO! No I want to date you. I swear I do!"

"So if I am not forcing you to date me then that means it's cause of the sex right?"

Roy noticed Edward tense and took it as a yes.

"It is about sex…" Roy sat there for a moment, then he started to freak out. "Shit. Ed. Shit, shit, shit… Oh my Gate-"

While Roy started mumbling swears Edward started to get freaked out. He started thinking Roy was pissed he wasn't going to get Edwards body anymore.

-"I am so sorry Ed I didn't mean to. I should have made sure you wanted sex. I didn't think I was actually forcing you to have sex. Oh fuck all this time I was basically raping you. I am so-"

Now both were in hysterics although for different reasons. Hearing the word rape though snapped Edward out of it. "Woah! Wait Roy! You raped me!"

"Shit yes I did! You just said you did want it and I forced you to do it."

"No you didn't force me Roy! I gave you full consent! I promise Roy. It was never rape."

"But you said you didn't want it and if I didn't force you…"

"I am sorry. I don't know… It is just…" Edward started to say then looked down to his hands which were sitting still in his lap.

"Is it because I am to rough? Did I hurt you Edward?"

Edward shook his head no.

"Are you positive, because I really did not mean to hurt you, if I did. You know you mean the world to me."

"No you have always prepared me well; I promise."

"Then what is wrong?" Roy wanted to grab Edward and hold him close to him, however right now he didn't feel like he had the right.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Edward you know we have to. I don't want you to cry anymore."

"I know we have to I-" Edward froze and took a breath. He could smell Roy even from where they were sitting on the bed. He was always addicted to the sent. He knew once he told Roy the reason as to why he cried, that Roy was going to break up with him. He just knew it. "I know we have to talk, but I also know that once I tell you, you are going to break up with me."

Roy sat confused for a minute then tensed up. "Did you cheat on me?"

"What? NO! No! no no no! I swear I never cheated on you." Edward had to admit, the anger in Roy's voice really scared him.

"Then what could you possibly say that would make me want to break up with you?"

"It is just really hard to explain it out loud so that it would make sense."

"Well try. I am all ears and I will listen to whatever you have to say. I promise I will listen to everything you say until it makes sense."

"Okay I guess I will try." Again Edward sat there for a moment trying to sort his thoughts out. He looked up at Roy and saw he was sitting there patiently. "I guess I should start at the beginning." Ed saw the slight nod of Roy's head and continued. "So, when you asked me out the first time I was so happy. I have loved you for the longest time right? Well then after the date when you asked me if I wanted to come to your house for hot chocolate I said yes thinking that's all that we were going to do because I thought I was different then all your other dates-"

"Edward you are-"

"Please let me finish before I lose the confidence to continue." Roy nodded and Edward continued. "Well when you started to kiss me I knew what was going to happen. I also knew I wasn't ready, but I still let it happen. After it happened I got nervous and that was the first time I cried. I cried because I thought I had given up my virginity to a one night stand."

Roy's eyes got huge. 'Shit… I took Ed's virginity? Damn it! How could I have been so stupid? I should have known he was a virgin. I should have been more careful. Damn it, damn it, damn it!'

While Roy was mentally beating himself up, Edward continued talking. Roy only stopped when he finally realized that Edward was still talking… like he was now on auto pilot. "Then I got to your office and you told me it was not a one night stand and that made me happy, but then y-you said that it was the best sex you ever had, and I was afraid that if we didn't have sex you would break up with me. I thought you only liked me because of my body. I know it sounds stupid but every time you said you loved me, you always brought up my body and it made me just think it even more."

To say that Roy was stunned would be an understatement. He had no response to what he just heard. He knew this was his entire fault. He knew he was terrible at admitting his feelings to Edward. Hell Edward was his first love. He had never said I love you to anyone besides his family. He knew he had made a mistake. He should have known Edward was a virgin. He should have known that Edward would be insecure. He should have known to be more clear about his declaration of love. He was just so stupid. He looked down to Edward and noticed that the boy was not looking at him. He was again looking down at his hands.

"Edward look at me."

Edward shook his head.

Roy sighed. He grabbed Edward's chin and pulled it up so Ed was looking into his eyes. "Listen I am so sorry. I should have known you a virgin and I shouldn't have taken it on the first date. I also should have made sure you knew my true feelings. Edward do know that you are my first relationship in a very long time and you are the first person I have ever loved besides my family. And I am serious when I say I love you. I don't just love your body, I love everything about you."

Roy smiled and leaned over to give Edward a kiss on the forehead. "I really wish you would have told me what you were thinking earlier. I do understand why you didn't tell, but I still wish you would have. Do know that I will never force you to have sex with me. You were, no are different from all the girls I have ever been with. Even from the beginning. I have never brought a girl home before. You are the first person that has ever lain in my bed besides me. You are also the first person I have ever told I love you too. You are the first person I even spent money on-"

Roy said with a wink.

"-All the girls I had one night stands with, they meant nothing to me. Ever since I met you, I have been in love with you. Those girls were a distraction for me until you became of age. I will never break up with you Edward. Not unless you decide you don't want me anymore."

"That will never happen" Ed said in a really quiet tone that Roy strained his ears to hear. Edward listened to every word Roy had said. He took every word in. Every word went straight to his heart. He knew Roy wasn't lying. He knew Roy loved him.

"Listen Edward, let us start over. I promise we will not have sex or do anything you don't feel comfortable with until you are 100% ready."

"No sex until I am ready?"

"Nope!"

"And you won't break up with me.?"

"Never."

"So how are you going to deal with not having sex." Ed said in a cheeky manner.

Although Edward said it as a joke, Roy answered anyway. "To be honest it will probably be hard and I will probably be using my hand a lot and I will be thinking of you while doing it if you don't mind and if you do I will try to think about something else, but I don't know how well it will work. However, I will do anything so you don't have to cry."

Edward blushed at the thought of Roy thinking of him while jacking off.

Roy started laughing. "I will take that as you do not mind?"

"Don't tease me!" Ed screamed while hitting Roy.

Roy still chuckling, rubbed Edward's head messing up the already bedhead. "Alright come on let us go take a shower and then go get breakfast at the café at the end of the block."

"Okay."

Both Edward and Roy got off the bed and walked into the bathroom. Edward turned the water on to the temperature that they usually have it. He turned around to see Roy grab a towel and had it to him. After he said thank you and took the towel, he saw Roy grab another and start walking out of the bathroom.

"Where are you going?"

"Huh? Oh I am going to go use the guest bathroom."

"Why this is your bathroom."

"I do not want to make you feel uncomfortable."

"It is just showering."

"Yeah well walking behind you to the bathroom kind of left me with a problem. So I think it is better for me to go take one in the guest room. I don't think I can last a whole shower with you in it." With that Roy slipped out of the bathroom and went into the shower down the hall.

Edward on the other hand was still staring at the place where his boyfriend was just standing. 'No showers together? All I wasn't ready for was the sex. I didn't mind the showers.' Edward quickly jumped into his shower and while washing his hair he started to think again. 'Am I still going to be able to sleep at his house? Or let alone in his bed? Shit what have I done?'

There is the revision I hope you enjoyed! now on to chapter 5!