Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Stephenie's.

BPOV

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." The priest's words seemed to drag on forever, but finally it was over. Edward kissed me softly, full of meaning and we were married. My nightmare was over. Or most of it, anyway, Jake was still missing.

I rode off to the Cullen's house in the limo that Alice insisted on us using. Edward was sitting next to me quietly, probably trying to figure out how to make the Jake situation better. He knew that it was tearing me up inside.

He probably was trying to figure out a way to say that it was all his fault that Jake left, that he wouldn't have left if he didn't send him the letter. Edward was always the one to try to make me feel better for the things that I'd done to other people.

But the thing was, I knew that this was my fault. If I didn't hurt Jake so bad in the first place, if I wasn't a selfish being, he wouldn't have fallen in love with me. He would have found some other girl who wasn't bound to a destiny of living for an eternity. A girl who wouldn't choose someone else over him. Someone not like me, someone that isn't selfish and someone who cares about how she affect other people's emotions.

"Bella, I'm sorry that I sent Jake that letter. I really am." Edward broke the silence, rubbing my back, trying to calm me.

"Edward, it's not your fault. I'm the one who hurt him first, your letter just pushed him over the edge."

"But I was the one to push him, I did, not you. I knew what I was doing too, I guess I wanted him to stay away during the wedding."

"I doubt that, you're a guy, but you're not that cruel. You were probably just being polite, which would make Esme happy. I'm not sure she'd be happy about the letter though, but the thought was nice, I think."

"But if I didn't send him that letter, he wouldn't have left like this. It's all my fault. I'm so sorry Bella, I truly am."

"Edward, I don't think the letter would have made much of a difference. I think the wedding and the turning of me would have pushed him over the barrier as it is. It would have happened anyway, stop blaming yourself."

"Aren't you even a little mad at me?"

"At first I was, but then I realized that he would have left anyway. And as I thought about it, I also realized that I pushed him way more then a little letter could, so I had no reason to be upset with you."

"I'm still sorry, you might have been able to see him again before he left."

"I wouldn't have seen him again if he didn't leave, I couldn't do that to him again. That is, until I heard that he ran away."

"What do you mean, until he ran away?"

"Edward, you have to trust me when I say this, okay?"

"What are..." he sighed deeply. "I trust you."

"Tomorrow night, I'm meeting Sam and the wolves to help search for Jake."

"But Bella, we were going to..." he pinched his nose. "I have to go with you."

"No, Edward, you can't. They won't let me go then. Plus we're meeting on the reservation, you can't come with me."

"Why not?"

"Because Sam thinks that you're going to drive him farther away. And I promised that I wouldn't let any of your family go either." I looked away sheepishly, guiltily.

"They made you promise? They think I'm going to interfere, don't they?"

"They didn't say that! They just want my help, that's all, no more. They didn't even want to let me go, but I kind of talked them into it."

"You tricked them into letting you go?"

"Yep, they didn't want me to go at all. They didn't even want to hear my voice. Sam threatened to hang up the phone when he realized that I was the one calling."

"So where does that leave us?"

"Edward, I love you entirely, you know that. But I have to help them find Jake, I owe it to them, to Jake. After I help get Jake home safe, we can go off to where ever you want to take me, we can start to enjoy our life as vampires together. But let me find Jake first. If I don't, I don't think I'll be very sane for very long."

"Okay Bella, but if there is anything, anything that I can do while your on you trip, call me on my cell, you got that?"

"Yes sir."

"So what do you want to do tonight?" Edward pulled his arms around me.

"Um, what about going to the meadow to spend the night?"

"Sounds like a wonderful idea Mrs. Edward Cullen." Edward laughed and smiled my favorite crooked smile.

"I know, doesn't it?"