Chapter 4: Moterbikes

Sorry for the delay but I'm kind of juggling three stories at once but had enough time to manage writing this one despite the chaos of this and last week for me. Thanks to all my reviewers. You guys rule more than my username (However true it is) and the world ;D

The remainder of the night felt like a weird twisted sense of deja-vu starting from the fact that I was kneeling beside her as she slept. The differences between the last time I did this and now was immense and seemed like a slap in the face to me because now her face was no longer tranquil and at ease. It was aggrieved and tormented as she tossed continually and her expression grew more distressed in every toss. The words she spoke in her sleep were pleading and repetitive. They consisted of my name and the words; abandon, lost, nothing, find, love, life and meaningless. Even a complete idiot such as myself could understand what dreams plagued her mind and it didn't exactly help my resolve nor make the decision I would have to make any easier. The guilt sickened me into silence and I for once had no question for Isabelle. Abruptly and alarmingly, a high pitched but undeniably genuine scream escaped her dry lips and I jumped up reflexively, my hands rubbed against her back consolingly but had no effect on her screams. It felt as if I were touching air but there was a barrier to stop my hand from falling through it. Regardless, I was touching her.

"You told me that I couldn't touch her" I roared in anguish at Isabelle.

"You can touch her but she won't feel it and neither can you" She stepped back instinctively from my outburst and her eyes contained fright. Her face was so similar to Bella's despite her eyes that I felt regretful for snapping at her and my tone softened.

"If she can't feel me then can she see me or hear me? Perhaps that is the reason why she is screaming" I reasoned but Isabelle was already shaking her head.

"No, she cannot see or hear you but as we discovered earlier today, she can hear you when she's in immediate danger" She explained earnestly. "But, the reason why she is screaming is the fault of her nightmares. Not you"

"But…" I started but was cut off by the sound of Bella's heavy breathing and the cease of her agonized shrieks.

"You'd think Charlie would have heard that" I muttered.

"Oh Charlie heard that all right but he's too used to it by now even to need to check on her"

"Too used to it" I gritted my teeth in self-loathing.

"Ugh, I think we should move on a few hours. Your pessimism is killing me" She groaned, pressing her talisman without warning to my cold arm before the world turned to nothing and dark was all I knew.

….

"Newtons outfitters" I seethed as I recognised my surroundings. "Is this some sort of cruel joke"

"Well her day was as mundane as the others and she basically did nothing but fulfil her obligations lifelessly until it was time to leave for work which as you know is here" She gestured to the store sign. "Now here is where it gets interesting"

"I'm starting to despise that word" I sighed, turning to where Mike was talking to Bella and receiving no response. I realised that she was listening to two men who were discussing something intently among themselves. Bella didn't even appear faintly interested and looked as if she were trying to tune out their conversation but with no noticeable success. Curious, I listened into their conversation to see which words Bella couldn't ignore. The conversation was mundane and almost expected of an average hiker.

"How is this important?" I asked Isabelle, feeling frustrated at my lack of knowledge.

"Well the bears they are discussing are actually wolves. Werewolves" She finished with a smile as if she had been anticipating my reaction for years instead of seconds. Now that I thought about it, the two men who were discussing their sighting of supposed 'grizzly bears' description was almost identical to the wolves my family had encountered back when Ephraim Black was around. If these hikers' description was accurate then it could mean that the wolves were back and if they were then that my family had a lot more problems to deal with and an even more pressing issue would be at hand. If the wolves were back then Bella would inevitably be involved in their mess and be in danger. She was a danger magnet and there was no way that she could escape this occurrence. How ironic! I would leave to save her and then leave her in the hands of werewolves. I shuddered internally at the thought of her even having eye contact with one of them.

"Yes. The wolves will be a part of yours and Bella's future inevitably" She answered my unspoken question.

"Great, just great" I groaned and then turned my attention back to Bella before Isabelle could reveal any more unpleasant news.

"Seriously, Bella, as soon as these two give up, I'm closing the place down," Mike informed her as if he had told her to leave numerous times and she hadn't listened. I growled at the fact that the idiotic boy could talk to her and I couldn't.

"If you want me to go…" Bella shrugged. Did she want to stay with him? Had something formed between them in the time that Isabelle and I had travelled? If it had then I wasn't sure that I could go any further. I looked into his mind for confirmation.

'Oooh does she want me to stay? I would for her but she's kind of messed up now so…' He thought. I let out a gust of air I had been holding in, in my relief and was glad that she hadn't dated such a fool, or dated anyone that wasn't me. I chastened myself for thinking that way immediately and focused on Bella's pale face.

"See you Monday" Bella mumbled before running out of the store and into the rain, dashing for her truck. Not wanting to trail behind her like last time, I got into the truck with her and watched as she drove her desecrated truck back to her house. It only took me a moment to realise that there was no music blaring from her stereo. Not even a whisper. I frowned, looking at where the stereo should have been and discovering a hole as if it had been ripped from it intentionally. I then remembered seeing it at the back of her closet and discovered that not only did she feel physical pain from remembering us but even music caused the same effect in her.

"I am truly a monster" I sighed.

"Don't you dare say that" Isabelle snapped, her tone irritated.

"You sound just like Bella" I smiled sadly.

"Well then maybe you should listen to her" She suggested, her dominant emotion being annoyance as if she had heard this many times before. Perhaps she had but from other people other than myself.

My head snapped up in surprise as Bella stomped on the brake and the car halted to a complete stop in a street that was seemed as unfamiliar to her as it did to me. Without warning, she then slumped her head over the steering wheel and curled up onto a ball on the car seat, her arms wrapping around herself tightly as if to stop herself from breaking apart.

"What is she doing?" I asked, my voice revealing the extreme horror I was experiencing, wishing more than ever that I could read Bella's mind.

"She's thinking of you. Your last words to her" Isabelle replied softly.

"Why did I have to lie and break her heart? Why?" I exclaimed out of despair.

"Remember this is the future and it can be changed" she reminded me brightly.

"I am still indecisive" I told her stubbornly, refusing to make a decision at this point when the future was so indistinct.

"You have plenty of time" She told me, leaning back into the car seat with ease. I was then distracted by the sound of Bella pounding her head on the steering wheel lightly and laughing without humour, without life. It was a forced laugh and one I had never expected to hear from her, one which was so…dead. She then settled back into the seat and took a deep breath, staring out the windshield with no emotion comprehendible on her pallid face. Unexpectedly she cut the engine and groaned before stepping out into the cold rain. Not seeming to know where she was, she took a look around and then freezing still as she perceived a sign announcing the selling of two run-down motorbikes. Something new swept across her face and she began walking towards the house.

"No…" I closed my eyes in utter disbelief. "No. No. NO" I screamed in frustration as I watched her ring the doorbell. She couldn't be doing what I thought she was doing could she? Isabelle laughed nervously but I ignored her. She couldn't be thinking, even contemplating buying those motorcycles could she? She would get herself killed. Once again irony was staring me in the face. No, I wouldn't kill her but a motorbike would! Would the risks never end?

"Why...? Why, Isabelle? Why?" I groaned.

"You broke your promise so she's intent on breaking hers" Isabelle informed me, watching Bella as she began discussing the bikes with the boy at the door.

"What promise" I seethed.

"The one where you told her that it would be like you never existed"

"I'm such an insensitive…" I struggled for the right word to describe the monstrosity that was me.

Isabelle sighed. "Just, watch" I turned back to Bella to see the boy help her carry the bikes onto her truck. Didn't he know what he was doing? That he could be the reason for her untimely death? His ignorance sickened me into silence.

"What are you going to do with them, anyway? They haven't worked in years." And they better not start working any time soon otherwise I would find the boy and strangle him.

"I kind of guessed that. Maybe I should take them to Dowlings" She mused although her voice portrayed no interest.

"Dowling would charge more to fix them than they'd be worth running." Yes Bella. Think of the expenses.

"You know what? That's okay. I know someone who builds cars." WHAT! She better be bluffing!

"Oh. That's good" It was nice that the boy expressed some concern for her but it was in the wrong area. He waved to her friendly as she drove back to her house hastily. The second she reached the house, she raced to the phone and dialled a number which was unfamiliar to me.

"Chief Sawn please, it's Bella" She answered into the phone. Why was she calling Chief Swan? Charlie would have a heart-attack if he found out that she bought two motorcycles and Bella was more than intelligent enough to know that.

"Can't I call you at work without there being an emergency" She spoke into the phone with a twinge of surprise.

"No. I just wanted directions to the Black's place" Jacob Black? My jaw clenched as I realised that he could possibly be a werewolf and my body burned with jealously as I remembered his crush on Bella at the prom. "I'm not sure I can remember the way. I want to visit Jacob. I haven't seen him in months."

"Why did it have to be the wolf child" I groaned.

Isabelle frowned at my expression. "You better get used to him because you'll be seeing him a lot"

"Perfect" I muttered, jealousy coursing through me. I then watched Bella place the phone on hold and run to get a pen and a pad of paper before she wrote down the directions of the infuriating boy's address.

"I'll be back for dinner" She assured him but her expression could be depicted as anxious although it was only a twinge. It seemed like every emotion she felt was only a fragment of the real thing, excluding her pain. That was the one emotion that she got to keep and one that was ruining her life. It was unjust that the most selfless and kind people ended worse off than the ones who were selfish and malicious. Bella deserved more.

Bella's ride to the Black's residence was quiet and even Isabelle had no comment's to make. It made me feel strangely lonely but I pressed myself to get used to it because when I left for real I would never escape it. If I left. Damn, I needed to stop that before I made up my mind too early. I sighed and looked at the approaching house, irritated to find that Jacob was already peering out of his window and anticipating her visit before they had even become close. 'This is bad 'I thought as I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. 'This is exceedingly bad'

"Bella!" He called out to her excitedly. If he even touched her…

"Hey, Jacob!" She smiled back although her smile was short-lived and not as full of life as it used to be. Still, it was an improvement. Damn Jacob for being the one to make her happy. You grew again!" She told him in surprise. A growth spurt was a symptom of a looming werewolf transformation and that only made the incident a whole lot worse than it already was.

"Six five" He would only have a few more months of normal in the least. I cursed in annoyance. He was taller than me and if a confrontation occurred then he would appear more intimidating, if he was a wolf at least and have another advantage. That was if I didn't snap his neck in the first second.

"Is it ever going to stop? You're huge" It better.

"Still a beanpole, though. Come inside! You're getting all wet." He grimaced, tying his hair into an unattractive ponytail and walked into the house with Bella.

"Hey, Dad. Look who stopped by." Jacob called out to his father who was reading a book in his living room.

"Well, what do you know! It's good to see you, Bella" Billy shook Bella's hand. The look of glee on his face was unmistakable and I held back a growl.

"What brings you out here? Everything okay with Charlie" Would she see you if that was the case?

"Yes, absolutely. I just wanted to see Jacob- I haven't seen him in forever" I hoped that her words were covering up her real reason and she didn't really mean it. The jealousy was crushing me now.

"Can you stay for dinner?" Billy asked Bella eagerly.

"No, I've got to feed Charlie, you know." She told a half-truth.

"I'll call him now. He's always invited."

"It's not like you'll never see me again. I promise I'll be back again soon- so much you'll get sick of me." I grumbled at her words and hoped that they weren't the case… unless they made her happy.

"Okay, maybe next time." Billy chortled.

So, Bella, what do you want to do?" Jacob asked Bella hopefully.

"Whatever. What were you doing before I interrupted." She said looking strangely at ease although not totally. It wouldn't take one visit to heal her completely although she looked relatively better from the zombie she could be compared to before.

"I was just heading out to work on my car, but we can do something else…" He trailed off.

"No, that's perfect! I'd love to see your car." Since when was Bella into cars? This must be to do with her motorcycle ruse.

"Okay. It's out back, in the garage" He informed her before leading her to his 'garage'. His vehicle was decent considering it wasn't complete but that didn't improve my view on him.

"What kind of Volkswagen is that?" Bella asked, trying to begin conversation.

"It's an old rabbit- 1986, a classic."

"How's it going?" She inquired.

"Almost finished. My dad made good on his promise last spring" His voice lowered as he mentioned his dad's promise and I knew why. How dare he mention that to her when she could break down as something as simple as thinking about me!

"Ah" Her voice became dark but then she tried to avoid the subject by subtly changing the topic.

"Jacob, what do you know about motorcycles?" Bella asked. 'Please be nothing' I thought desperately.

"Some. My friend Embry has a dirt bike. We work on it together sometimes. Why?"

"Well…," She pursed her lips as if she were considering how to tell him how to ask him the favour which I wished she wouldn't ask. "I recently acquired a couple of bikes, and they're not in the greatest condition. I wonder if you could get them running?" Please say no! Please say no!

"Cool .I'll give it a try" I wanted to kill the boy for endangering Bella's safety by agreeing to such a notion. Bella raised up one finger in warning to the boy who listened eagerly to her next words.

"The thing is that Charlie doesn't approve of motorcycles, Honestly, he'd probably bust a vein in his forehead if he knew about his" For a good reason. "So you can't tell Billy" Like he would!

"Sure, sure, I understand."

"Of course he does" I grumbled. Isabelle had no comment and was silently watching the pair.

"I'll pay you" Bella offered, pleasing me by offending the irritating boy.

"No. I want to help. You can't pay me."

"Well… how about a trade then? I only need one bike- and I'll need lessons, too. So how about this? I'll give you the other bike, and then you can teach me." This was getting worse by the second!

"Swee-eet."

"Wait a sec- are you legal yet? When's your birthday?" I hoped that it was in another year so he couldn't teach her.

"You missed it, I'm sixteen." Damn.

"Not that your age ever stopped you before, sorry about your birthday."

"Why did she have to make friends with a troublemaker, why?" I moaned to myself.

"He will keep her alive on countless occasions so you better be grateful for his presence" Isabelle murmured.

"That doesn't make me feel any better" I hissed.

"Don't worry about it. I missed yours. What are you, forty?" Jacob laughed, causing Bella to sniff.

"The idiot mentioned age" I muttered.

"Close"

"We'll have a joint party to make up for it."

"Sounds like a date"

"WHAT!" I yelled in my shock. "It would have helped to warn me of this!" I fumed at Isabelle who rolled her eyes.

"She was speaking figuratively but Jacob doesn't know that"

"Maybe when the bikes are finished – our present to ourselves," She added.

"Deal. When will you bring them down?" Jacob asked, his anticipation barely contained. Bella looked embarrassed as she answered.

"They're in my truck now,"

"Great."

"Will Billy see if we bring them around?" Hopefully.

"We'll be sneaky." Jacob winked at Bella before they both walked to Bella's truck and Jacob unloaded the bikes.

"These aren't half-bad. This one here will actually be worth something when I'm done- it's an old Harley Sprint." Jacob commented.

"That one's yours, then."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

"These are going to take some cash, though. We'll have to save up for parts first." 'No Bella, don't use up all your money on something that could take your life!' I thought desperately to myself.

"We nothing. If you're doing this for free, I'll pay for the parts" Bella was always so stubborn and this time for a very bad reason.

"I don't know…,"

"I've got some money saved. College fund, you know." She said casually and Jacob nodded in agreement.

"How can she spend her collage funds, her future on something as stupid as this?" I demanded of Isabelle.

"She wants to be distracted for the pain….and to hear you" Isabelle answered quietly.

"Hear me" I whispered in my shock.

"Remember in Port Angeles with Jessica? Every time Bella is in danger she will be able to hear you so choose your words carefully. You must not tell her the truth yet. It will stuff up history" Isabelle warned. I nodded and then turned back to Bella who was walking back with Jacob to the garage.

Sorry if the end of the chapter was a little crappy but I was writing it while minding my nephews. Thanks for reading! Please review! ;)