A/N: This is just for my (and hopefully your) amusement. I own nothing and I'm not seeking any profit from publishing this work.

With the exception of the Prologue and Epilogue this story takes place in Harry and Daphne's sixth year and is canon compliant through OOTP. My plan is to stick to ideas and concepts in HBP and DH as well as the greater HP canon wherever possible...particularly as it relates to what little we've been told about Astoria Greengrass.

Chapter 3: The Importance Of Being Earnest

The morning after the oddest conversation Daphne had ever had found her entering the empty Arithmancy classroom a full thirty minutes before class was to start. She had made it a habit to arrive early to this class for the last two years, using the time for a quick review of the prior week's lesson. The concepts and way of thinking behind the art of Arithmancy were so different than her other classes the extra refresher was helpful to keep pace with Granger. With her pedestrian scores in Defence it was essential she excel in all her other classes if she wanted to keep pace with the Gryffindor. That Ravenclaw Patil was annoyingly intelligent and ambitious as well.

Her normal review would not be happening today however. After taking her customary seat in the front ("Always exude confidence in the large and most importantly the small things", her mother had drilled into her head) she quickly pulled out a blank parchment and self-inking quill, setting to work.

Harry had caught her off guard the night before. Although he had promised to be honest in his note her years as a Slytherin and her father's training had taught her that it was at best a half-truth. He would assuredly tell the truth, he was a Gryffindor after all, but she had expected to have to pry the important bits out...to have to trick and charm him into telling her what she wanted to know...to engage in a manipulative dance to get answers out of him that he didn't want to provide. She could not have been more wrong. He had freely told her what she needed to hear to gain her trust. The two hours they spent talking flew by in what felt like a quarter of that time and by the time they left Hurricane Potter had won her over seemingly without really trying. She had expected a chess match and Harry insisted on playing checkers.

It turns out he is exceptionally good at checkers.

Since the need for finesse was out she decided to be practical and simply make a list of questions for tonight after she saw the Chamber. After she saw the Chamber...she had repeated the words in her head too many times to count since last night and it still didn't seem possible. She was sure the story of what happened in the Chamber would be much more mundane than the rumors she had heard (she was very confident Harry did not have the head of the Gorgon he had slayed mounted over his bed) but just the fact that he found and entered the Chamber was beyond impressive.

'Dammit, Daphne' she muttered to herself for becoming distracted from her task again. 'Stop daydreaming,' she commanded as she set to work.

Questions for GB

First Year: Did he really kill a troll with the Sword of Gryffindor? Why did he and his friends win so many house points at the end of first year. Did he say something was growing on Quirrel?

Second Year: What happened? Is he the heir of Slytherin? Why did he try to kill Finch Fletchley with the snake? What happened to Lockhart?

Third Year: Can he really produce a Patronus? Did he really kill Sirius Black with the Sword of Gryffindor?

Fourth Year: How did he get away from You Know Who in fourth year? Did he secretly date the Veela contestant? Is he really soul bound with the Veela contestant's sister?

Fifth Year: Why did he have a hearing at the Ministry before fall term? What happened at the Ministry...did he really fight You Know Who? What was the D.A? Why wasn't I invited?

Sixth Year: Why does he stare at Draco so much?

She had just finished writing down her last question (Why does Snape hate him?) and was stowing away her parchment as a voice cleared behind her. She looked up to the smiling face of Hermione Granger. "Mind if I sit here?" she asked as she sat down without waiting for an answer.

Daphne looked around the classroom and noticed every other seat was still available and immediately became suspicious. While she and Granger were cordial, even friendly with each other, they never sat together. Something was definitely going on.

Ninety minutes later her Arithmancy instruction was finished and she could not recall one thing that was covered. She had spent the entire session waiting for Granger to do something...anything. To Daphne's utter confusion she had done nothing. No furtive glances, no notes passed, no hushed instructions...just a polite smile and 'Goodbye' as she packed up her notes and left the classroom. Were all Gryffindors this confusing or was it just Harry and the ones he hung out with?

It's a funny thing about standing outside a toilet. If you think you may need to use it...at all...the need increases exponentially knowing relief is so close. She had met Moaning Myrtle in her first year and had vowed never to visit this particular toilet ever again. A group of third year Slytherins had sent her there as a joke and she was subjected to Myrtle...well there was no better word for it...moaning how unfair it was that Daphne was alive and that she was dead. 'She's probably in the pipes somewhere else in the castle' she convinced herself as the insistent needs of her bladder won out against her desire to avoid the ghost.

It wasn't until she was exiting the stall that she was greeted by the toilet's permanent resident. "Come back to gloat I see," she said piteously.

"Pardon?" Daphne replied, attempting to hide her own displeasure at meeting Myrtle again. "Gloating about what?"

"The fact that you're still alive of course. Well you've made your point so you can go now!" she spit out through her quickly forming tears.

Daphne rolled her eyes as she washed her hands and responded. "As much as I'd love to I'm actually meeting someone here. We're going to visit the Chamber of Secrets. I've got bad news for you though... he's alive too."

Myrtle immediately stopped crying and became unnaturally happy. "Harry is coming soon?"

"The one and only. How do you enter from here anyway?"

The ghost became suspicious and glared at Daphne. "How do I know you aren't trying to trick me?"

Daphne opened her mouth to respond when she heard a voice come from the doorway. "It's okay Myrtle she's telling the truth. How are you doing?"

Myrtle's expression immediately softened as she responded. "Hello Harry. Why haven't you come to see me lately? It's been so long!"

"Sorry about that Myrtle. Err...I never thanked you properly for your help in the lake did I? Thanks, you really were a big help."

If it was possible for a ghost to blush Myrtle did. 'Even the dead have a crush on him', Daphne mused as she saw Harry move toward the sink.

Harry looked confused as he spoke, "I thought I said to wear old clothes? It really is foul down there."

Her defensive nature kicked in at the perceived scolding and she responded without thinking. The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. "These are old. Some of us just choose not to wear rags on a regular basis." She immediately regretted it.

"My mistake," he muttered with a look of disappointment and embarrassment as Myrtle joined in the conversation.

"I don't like her very much Harry. Why would you want to show her the Chamber?"

He turned to Myrtle and smiled. "She's all right Myrtle…just a bit...jaded." The smile vanished as he turned back to Daphne. "Are you ready?"

She hadn't meant it...not really. Things had gone so well last night. She should have known he didn't mean his question as an insult. And no one would choose to wear the clothes he wore. There had to be a reason. She mentally berated herself for falling into the easy play of insulting someone to prove you are their 'better.'

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"Are you ready?" he asked more insistently. "We should get going."

He waited for her nod, turned to the sinks and began to hiss.

'That will always sound creepy' she thought as she watched, to her amazement, the sink opening up and revealing an entrance. 'I'm really going to see the Chamber of Secrets' she thought to herself as the sink finished creaking open.

Daphne tentatively looked into the new opening to reveal a massive, quite disgusting, pipe. The smell alone did not bode well for what they would find on the other end. She turned back to Harry and realized for the first time that he was holding a broom.

"You have two options", he began clinically, "You can ride on the broom with me and I will do my best to avoid the filth on our way down or you can just slide. Sliding is perfectly safe..that's how we did it last time."

She didn't have to think even a moment before responding. "Broom," she said while looking at the opening and making a face, "definitely the broom." As she mounted the broom and wrapped her arms around Harry the resident ghost interjected.

"My offer still stands, Harry," she said shyly. "If anything should happen and you die down there you are welcome to share my toilet."

The shy sweetness then left her face as she frowned and turned toward Daphne. "Not her though. She reminds me of Olive."

Daphne had no idea who Olive was but she was fairly certain it was not a compliment. "Never fear. If I die I'll make sure to set up residence in one of the seventh floor toilets...much better view of the grounds."

"Smart," she heard Harry comment with a chuckle and she smiled, thankful that she'd been able to lighten the mood at least a little bit.

Harry then turned to Myrtle with a smile to rival Gilderoy Lockhart. "Myrtle would you try to make sure no one comes in here until we come back? I'd really appreciate it. And if I...umm...you know...die...this toilet will be first on my list of places to haunt...with you." Daphne got the impression that this charm...this magnetism...came naturally to Harry and he wasn't even trying. Much.

Myrtle responded as any girl with the maturity of a thirteen year old would having a sixteen year old Harry Potter flirt with her. The fact that Myrtle had been waiting over 50 years for someone to flirt with her only added to the impact. Her translucent mouth dropped open as she dumbly nodded and slowly floated toward the entrance...never taking her eyes off of Harry.

With the ghostly guard now at her post Harry and Daphne slowly began the descent down the pipe. True to his word he did his level best to avoid touching the pipe. As well as he did she was certain she would never wear the shoes she had on again due to the muck and filth accumulating with each bump. There was a reason her parents had nicknamed her 'Princess' as a child and as much as she hated to admit it it was appropriate.

It was truly a new experience to fly with Harry. She had of course flown in the past...she was a witch after all...but she had always seen it as a means to an end..a pedestrian means of transportation. But as he guided them so smoothly...seemingly flowing through the pipe themselves...she understood (kind of) what all the stupid boys in Slytherin house went on and on about. It became FLYING when done like this.

They eventually landed and she found herself to be oddly disappointed before quickly remembering where they were headed. "Still a bit of a walk from here," he stated, waiting for her nod of acknowledgement before moving on.

They had walked in silence for several minutes before he began speaking in a quiet tone. "I live with my muggle relatives. They don't like me very much...don't like me to have nice things."

"Harry, you don't-" but she was interrupted again as he continued, stubbornly refusing to stop now that he had started.

"The muggle clothes I wear used to belong to my cousin...they are his hand me downs. I think they make a point to only give me the most worn bits."

He continued to stare straight ahead and kept walking. "After so many years with no other options I don't even think about how I look. I should work on that. I actually do have some decent things….a suit from last summer."

She could take no more and grabbed his elbow to get his attention. "I really am sorry...you don't have to explain." She suddenly found herself not being able to stop now that she had started. "I'm so used to dealing with idiots throwing around insults and threats simply because they can, I get thrown off when anyone besides my family or Tracey is genuinely nice to me. I keep expecting for you to start in with the insults."

She felt infinitely better when he gave her a small smile and nodded . "It's no problem...glad to see I fall in the 'non-idiot' category."

"It's early Potter. You could be reclassified in an instant so-".

She was jerked out of her thoughts at the sight of what looked to be a massive snake skin that stretched at least twenty feet. "Please tell me we aren't headed to visit the former owner of that skin Harry."

Harry looked sheepish as he dragged his free hand through his hair. "We are...but it's dead...and slightly bigger."

Daphne's eyes bulged as his words sunk in. "You killed it I'm guessing?" she asked dumbly.

Harry seemed to quickly become uncomfortable and bowed his head slightly before speaking. "Yeah...but it was mainly down to luck...if I hadn't had the sword-"

"Wait," she cut in, "don't tell me you really have the Sword of Gryffindor."

"Well not anymore," he stated simply. "I um...gave it back to Dumbledore once I was...you know...finished."

Daphne stared.

"Right," he finally stated after waiting for Daphne to speak, "shall we carry on then?"

She dumbly nodded (now dubbed the 'Potter nod' since he seemed to be able to cause it at will) and followed him down the hall. Neither spoke again until coming to another entrance. Harry hissed an incantation and again the door slowly creaked open.

As they began to file in the room Harry warned, "The former owner of that skin is just through here. As I said it's...pretty big."

There are moments in life that fundamentally and irrevocably alter one's perspective forever. The moment she entered the Chamber and gazed at the sheer mass of the basilisk (basilisk!) was one of those moments. It was easily fifty feet long. Fifty. Feet. Long.

She had heard so many outrageous and outlandish stories about The Boy Who Lived. She'd even read some of those ridiculous 'Adventures of Harry Potter' books when she was younger. But none of them approached what she was now looking at...tangible proof at what he had done at twelve.

She chanced a glance at Harry and saw he was looking at her, assessing her reaction to the beast and to him. He actually looked nervous? Embarrassed? It was unfathomable to her.

She slowly made her way over to the snake and broke the silence. "So you stabbed this thing to death?"

It took him a moment to respond, caught off guard by the break in the silence. "Umm...yeah...you can probably see the stab wound on the top of it's head. It umm...tried to bite me and I stabbed it through the roof of its mouth and through the top. Actually got me too. Bit me on the arm."

Daphne approached the head slowly. She knew it was irrational and ridiculous but the sheer size and power the beast exuded made her think it could not be killed...that it was pretending to be dead and would lunge at her at any moment. Eventually she made it over and saw the clear gash in the snake's head just as Harry had said. She also noticed that both eyes had been gouged out.

The shock was beginning to wear off and the analytical part of her brain locked back in. They'd started at the end of the tale. Now it was time to start working back to the beginning.

"How did you do that to its eyes?" she said, never taking her eyes off the snake.

"Oh that was Fawkes...Dumbledore's phoenix. I was talking to Tom...well I'll get to that later...I had shown loyalty to Dumbledore and Fawkes came to help. He flew in and clawed its eyes out."

Daphne suddenly remembered what Harry said about being bitten and slowly walked over to him. So far he had been unfailingly honest with her but this part of his story had to be exaggerated. Basilisk venom was fatal...quickly...unequivocally fatal. "You said it bit you. Can you show me?"

Harry quickly rolled up his sleeve and pointed to a shiny spot of skin above his elbow.

Her eyes bore into the arm...unconsciously grazing it with her finger. "How are you still alive?"

She looked at him and he smiled...a true, genuine smile. It struck her that she couldn't remember ever seeing him that open and relaxed. It was nice.

"It was Fawkes...he was brilliant. You're right. I was dying...knew I was going to die...but he cried phoenix tears into the wound. Healed it right up." She noticed how much more relaxed he became when he was talking about the phoenix and not about himself.

More ridiculousness. To gain the trust and affection of a phoenix enough for them to share their healing tears in such a way was rare...virtually unheard of. Daphne wondered if Fawkes would be quite as generous with the tears if she was in need.

She wanted...needed to hear it all...but one question leapt out above all...one she couldn't quite understand. She looked back at the basilisk and then back to Harry. "Before you tell me anything more I want to know why."

"Why what?" Harry replied confusedly.

"You came in here...all alone...twelve years old...and fought that. Why? Why not run away? Why not tell the professors?"

Again Harry looked down at his feet...as if he was embarrassed at what he was about to say. "Do you remember the message on the wall? 'Her skeleton will lie in the Chamber forever.' That was real. There really was a student dying down here."

Daphne was struck again by how defensive he seemed. What he had done was amazing...impossible to fathom. Why wasn't he proud...gloating even?

"Ron tried to come to but we got separated in the tunnel back there...where all the rocks were. And we tried to get help from the staff but that didn't work out and we were running out of time. I know you are going to say it's stupid and it was stupid but I couldn't not try. Someone was dying!"

'Twelve years old' kept repeating in her mind. 'He did that when he was twelve years old.'

She always believed that she and her family were inherently good...that they always did the right thing when they could...but she suddenly realized that it wasn't true. They did what was right when it was feasible...when there was no risk...when it helped them. She felt like a massive fraud.

"Right," she muttered as she cast Scourgify on the floor and conjured two simple chairs for them to sit on. She waited for him to sit down before she continued, looking straight into his eyes.

"I still want to hear all the details about second year and all the other things you've been up to but I'm in."

She looked down at the floor and continued on in a rush, vomiting out the words as quickly as possible before she lost her nerve. "I want to talk to my parents. This has implications for my family. They need to know and I'd like to get their advice on the wording of the blood oath. But even if they disagree I'm in. This is important. If I can help I want to at least try. You need to know I am rubbish at Defence though. If you are expecting me to protect you from a death eater or something you should best get to planning your funeral now."

She looked up to see him staring at her...mouth open...trying to say something and utterly failing. 'It's nice to be on this side of the stupid expression,' she mused as she smirked and waited for him to gather himself.

He eventually recovered and cleared his throat. "Uh...that's great. I mean really great. To be honest I thought this would have been a lot harder but this is...great!"

"Just make it worth my time Harry. You've been remarkably unlike an idiot so far. Don't screw it up."

He laughed and quickly looked at his watch. "We have thirty minutes until curfew. We can either head back and talk more later or we can stay as long as you'd like and sneak back late."

She regarded him and folded her arms, pondering her options. "Did you bring your invisibility cloak?"

He smiled and nodded.

"And that other thing...the parchment that you used the last time?"

Another smile. Another nod.

"Why not? I've just agreed to fight You Know Who. Getting caught breaking curfew seems like the least of my worries. Is it okay if we keep talking and risk it?"

Harry grinned and replied. "Of course! I'm a dumb, bold Gryffindor remember? This is what we do!"

Daphne smiled in reply...a real smile...the one that was typically reserved for Tracey and Astoria. "Excellent. Now since we've been talking about second year why don't we start at the beginning."

Harry nodded his head and began. "I hope you don't mind missing curfew by a lot because it is a long story. "It all began in Flourish and Blotts about a month before fall term started…"