Regina sat on the edge of her bed with the dagger in her hand. The kiss hadn't left her mind in the hours since it had happened and whenever she closed her eyes, she could feel Emma's lips on hers once again. She gripped on to the dagger and bit her bottom lip as she trailed a fingertip over Emma's name engraved in the blade.

It was almost midnight and the knock on her door startled her. She slipped the dagger under her pillow before pulling on her robe. She unlocked the door and opened it, surprised to see Henry still awake and standing just outside her door.

"Henry," Regina sighed. "What are you doing? Why aren't you asleep?"

"I—I had a nightmare."

"Would you like to talk about it?"

"No. Yes," he frowned. "I don't know."

Regina reached out to wrap an arm around his shoulders. "Come on, let's go downstairs and I'll make us some herbal tea and you can tell me about your nightmare if you wish."

Regina remembered when he was younger, years before he was given that book that forever change the course their lives would take, when he would wake up in the middle of the night and she would make him some herbal tea to sooth him, to calm him, to help ease him back to sleep as he told her of his nightmares. It had been a long time since he came to her because of a bad dream and as she led the way into the kitchen, she looked back at him and saw the young boy he once was and not the man he was growing into.

Regina filled the kettle and placed it on the burner on the stove. She sighed tiredly as she turned it on and retrieved two mugs from the cupboard and placed them on the counter. Henry grabbed the small jar of homemade herbal tea that Regina occasionally used only as a sleep aid and smiled at her as he opened the jar.

"I talked to David earlier," Regina said as she handed Henry a small measuring spoon.

"You did?"

"Yes," she nodded, watching him carefully as he scooped the tealeaves into each mug meticulously. "I'll be taking you over there around ten."

"Sounds good," Henry said and he placed the measuring spoon on the counter. "You should come too, Mom. You haven't really spent a lot of time with Neal."

"Perhaps another time," Regina replied. "Next time," she said as she looked at her son pointedly. "I promise."

Regina grabbed the measuring spoon and rinsed it off in the sink before drying it with the towel that was hanging off the oven handle. Henry rapped his fingers against the counter before turning to her with a slight frown on his face.

"I saw her," he said quietly. "Ma. Emma," he finished before sighing heavily and rapped his fingers against the countertop again. "She really did kill all those people, Hook, Hood and his men, didn't she?"

"The Dark One did—"

"But it is a part of her now so she did it, didn't she?"

"Henry, you need to understand that while the Dark One's essence is inside of her, it's not her doing these things. She isn't in control."

"How do you know that?" Henry challenged her. "How do you know she isn't control, Mom? Have you seen her?" He asked and he shook his head as he took a step back and crossed his arms over his chest. "You have, haven't you?"

"Henry—"

"Stop lying to me! Why can't you just tell me the truth?"

Regina flinched at the tone of his voice and how it had risen with his anger and frustration. Gone was the voice she'd known when he'd been a boy and it was replaced with that of a voice of a boy that was not yet a man.

"I've seen her," Regina admitted hesitantly. "Henry, you don't want to see her like this."

"How do you know that?"

"Because you don't."

"Mom—"

"No," Regina snapped. "Henry, you need to understand that right now, she is not herself and she may not be for some time yet. I don't want you to see what she has become."

"But I've already see what she has become," Henry said angrily. "She killed those people! Why did she do that? Why, Mom? Why did she kill them?"

Regina fought her own tears as she pulled her son into her embrace, holding him tightly as his whole body wracked with uncontrollable sobs. "It isn't her," she whispered into his ear. "It is not her, Henry."

"I just want her back."

"I know."

"Can you bring her back, Mom?" Henry asked as he pulled back just enough to look at Regina in the eyes. The tears the spilled forth broke her heart and despite not knowing the answer herself, she just nodded. "Do you promise?"

"Yes, Henry," she whispered and placed a firm kiss on his forehead before wiping away at the tears spilling down his cheeks. "I promise that I will try."

The kettle started to whistle and Regina placed another kiss on his forehead before turning to the stove to lift the steaming kettle off the burner. Her hands were shaking, as they did a lot more these days, as she poured the hot water into the first mug and then to the second. She added just a half of a teaspoon of sugar to Henry's mug before draining the tealeaves.

"Was that what your nightmare was about, Henry?"

"I saw her…killing them," he whispered as he carried his mug over to the kitchen table and sat down in his usual seat. "I shouldn't have watched the news last night. It's not even on every night, only when…bad things happen, but once I started watching it, I couldn't stop. I—I don't want to believe that she did those things."

Regina reached out for him and brought their foreheads together. "Just remember that this isn't who she is, Henry. Don't give up on her, okay?"

"Okay."

Regina pressed her lips to his forehead once more before pulling back. "We both love you so very much. Don't you ever forget that."

"I won't, Mom."

"Drink your tea," Regina said quietly. "What else was your bad dream about?"

"Mostly just that," Henry shrugged. "It scared me because I know she's out there right now and I don't know if I'm going to wake up to find out she killed someone else."

"Do you remember what I used to tell you when you had nightmares? Think of a happy memory as you fall back asleep and your happy memory will chase away the fears," she said and he smiled, nodding his head as he remembered. "What is one of your happy memories of Emma?"

"Anytime the three of us are together," Henry replied. "As a family. I like it when it's just the three of us together, Mom."

"Me too."

"Do you think it'll ever be the way it was before?"

"It's all we can hope for," Regina smiled and she sipped her tea, glancing up at the ceiling momentarily and knew that if Emma was awake, she was without a doubt listening to their conversation. "Are you feeling any better? Ready to try to go back to sleep yet, Henry?"

"I guess," he shrugged. "I'll finish this upstairs," he said as he held up his cup of herbal tea he'd barely drunk from yet. "Thanks, Mom."

"Good night," Regina smiled at him and he stood up from the chair, pausing to dip his head down to place a kiss on her forehead. "I love you."

"Love you too, Mom. Night."

Regina sat in the quiet for quite some time after Henry returned to bed, sipping her tea and feeling the effects kick in shortly after she had finished it. She turned off the lights and headed up to her bed, pausing momentarily at the door to the third floor stairs. The key was safely tucked inside her bedside table drawer and since it was the middle of the night, she wasn't feeling up to checking in on Emma and having a repeat of what had happened earlier.

As much as she wanted to kiss her again, she knew it couldn't happen. Emma wasn't entirely herself and Regina had her suspicions that her motive behind kissing her was not because she wanted to, but because it had become a game of power. It was a ploy Regina knew all too well, unfortunately, and one she had never been on the receiving end of before. It made her feel uneasy because of her feelings for Emma, and it made her heart ache and wish to go back to a time where things were just easier. Back to a time before their whole lives had changed once again. Back to a time before Emma had sacrificed herself to save her and the rest of the town.

Regina removed her robe once she was inside her room. She yawned as her exhaustion hit her completely. She couldn't even truly recall the last time she'd slept, but it'd been a few days, maybe a little longer, since she'd had more than a few hours of fitful, restless sleep. She crawled into bed, her eyes sliding shut the moment her head hit the pillow and she tiredly pulled the covers over her body and willed for sleep to come and for her dreams to be just that, dreams and not the nightmares that came and went just as they had for Henry.

More often than not, Regina found herself thinking of Emma, especially in those heavy moments just before she succumbed to the pull of sleep. It was in those moments she allowed herself to indulge in fantasy of a life that wasn't hers, of a relationship that never possibly could be. Before it had been because of obstacles that came in form of two men that had instilled themselves into one another's lives. It had been a never-ending fight to save lives and the town and even when thing had slowed down for almost two whole months, there were still other reasons that kept things from going any further than friendship between them. Yet, it still didn't stop Regina, in those moments before she fell asleep, of thinking of all the ways they could've been together and wishing for the chance to make it all come true.

In a simpler life, in a different world even, it would make perfect sense that they would be together, that they could be in love and raise their son together. It wasn't much different than what they had already been doing, but that was a different world, a simpler life, and one where Emma Swan could love her too.

Regina had always been hyperaware when she was dreaming, knowing she was dreaming and sometimes able to control her dreams unless they had turned into nightmares and her control was stripped away. She knew when she blinked open her eyes that she had awoken into a familiar dream. She knew from the way the soft glow pooled into the room and from the way the air simply tasted. It was here in this world, this other life, that Emma Swan did indeed love her too, and one too many times she had indulged in her fantasy, allowing it to play out in her dreams to make up for the lack of it in her life while she was awake.

She knew who was there in the bed beside her without having to look. She could feel Emma shift beside her and like most times her dreams started out this way, she knew exactly where it would lead as it always did.

Yet, after what had happened between her and Emma upstairs earlier, she wasn't so sure she wanted to dream of that, of making love with a woman who only truly existed there in that space, in her mind and her imagination.

"Are you awake?"

"No," Regina said quietly. "Are you?"

"I don't know," Emma smiled and Regina turned to look at her, allowing herself to indulge in her sweet smile and loving, adoring eyes. "Care to find out?"

"Emma, we can't do this."

"Why?"

"This isn't real," she said sadly. "It's not real. You're not real."

Emma shook her head and reached for Regina's hand under the sheets. She could feel the softness of her hand and the warmth of it, and it did indeed feel as real as ever. She could smell Emma's shampoo, only just faintly, and the hint of vanilla that always seemed to invade her senses even if Emma wasn't close by. She closed her eyes and felt Emma's soft lips press to her cheek.

"I'm not real, am I?"

"No."

"Are you sure?" Emma whispered, her lips pressing to her cheek once more. "Because you feel real to me, Gina."

"Don't call me that," Regina sighed. "Don't ever call me that again."

"I know you're lying," Emma said and she squeezed her hand gently. "I can always tell. You like it when I call you that don't you? Nobody else ever calls you that."

Regina turned her head away and closed her eyes again, but because she was dreaming, she could still very much see the room they were in and she could still very much feel the bed and the soft sheets against her naked body. And she could still very much feel Emma's hand in her own and the way that Emma intertwined their fingers with practiced ease.

"Tell me why I'm not real, Gina."

"Because I'm dreaming."

"Are you?"

"Yes," she sighed in annoyance. "You're nothing but a figment of my imagination. You're supposed to agree with me."

Emma laughed and lifted her other hand, placing a finger under Regina's chin before she turned her head and waited for Regina to open her eyes. "But what if I'm not?"

"My mind and my heart is playing a cruel trick on me," Regina said quietly and it only caused Emma to laugh again. "That is all it is. A trick."

"Why is it a trick?"

"Because you are upstairs right now," Regina replied. "Because you," she sighed as she stared into Emma's beautiful green eyes, "you are not you, but you are. I'm trying to help you, Emma. I'm trying to save you. I—I don't know how."

"I know," Emma nodded and squeezed her hand again just as gently as before. "You will, Regina, you will save me. I know you won't give up until you do."

"I don't know how, Emma."

"You'll figure it out," she smiled. "You always do, don't you?" Regina shook her head as Emma's hand moved to cup her cheek gently. "You do, Regina, and you will this time too. I have all my faith in you."

"I wish I could believe that to be true."

"You know that it is true," Emma smiled, shifting until their bodies were almost touching, their lips so very close. "I'm just a figment of your imagination, remember? In a way, wouldn't that be your conscious telling you what you already know?"

Emma—or rather her conscious—did have a point and she relaxed in the soft bed and closed her eyes again when Emma pressed her lips to her cheek just shy of the corner of her mouth.

It never went this way, but Regina supposed it had a lot to do with the current turn of events and the fact that Emma Swan was locked up in her attic, bound there by a powerful enchantment only Regina could break.

"When was the last time?"

"Pardon?" Regina asked, blinking as Emma stayed close to her, their lips a hairsbreadth apart. "When was what the last time?"

"That I was here with you?"

"It's been…a while."

"How long is a while?" Emma asked with a teasing smile. "Gina?"

"It has been a few weeks," she sighed. "Not since before…everything happened."

Emma kissed her then and it was soft and slow and sweet. The moment Regina began to respond to the kiss was the moment she realized this was far different than any other times she had dreamt of doing this, but Emma's tongue was demanding entrance past her lips and her mind was spinning as she gave in completely.

When Emma moved to lie on top of her—a first—she could feel the warmth of her naked flesh against her own and she could feel the weight of her body as Emma relaxed on top of her. Regina didn't think of much else other than kissing her and she let her hands roam over the smooth expanse of Emma's back, revelling in the way Emma shivered when she traced her fingers down her spine slowly. It was Emma who broke the kiss first and she smiled down at Regina and lifted her fingers to trace alone her jaw slowly.

"It should've been like that the first time," Emma whispered.

"What are you talking about?"

"Our first kiss," she smiled lightly. "It should've been just like that."

"What—" Regina sat up, but Emma was gone and she was alone in her bed, the soft glow of light traded in for the first rays of sunlight that poked their way through her partially drawn drapes. "Gods," Regina groaned and she fell back against the bed, grasping at her pajama top and deftly flicked open the top three buttons in an attempt to cool herself off.

Her alarm went off just minutes later and she flipped it off before crawling out of bed. It was early yet and she knew she'd only been asleep for a few hours at most, but it had only felt like a handful of minutes at most. It took her longer than usual to get ready for the day and she spent almost twenty minutes just standing under the hot spray of water in the shower, replaying her dream over and over again, more so what Emma had said in those few lingering seconds before she'd woken up with a start.

She was grateful that Henry was already downstairs when she finally made it out of her room. He was hunched over a bowl of frosted flakes, half-awake, but dressed and ready to start the day. Regina fiddled with the coffee maker, sighing in frustration when she spilled the water when she filled up the reservoir and missed the filter when she scooped out the appropriate amount of grounds into it slowly.

"Mom, you okay?"

"Fine, dear," she sighed as she finally turned the infuriating machine on and wiped her hands over her black slacks. "I am just a little tired today, is all."

"Are you going to go back to the vault today?"

"No," she shook her head. "I have some books here I can go through, although I have picked them apart enough as it is. I believe there is something that I am missing."

"You'll get it," Henry smiled. "You got this, Mom."

His enthusiasm and faith in her reminded her so much of Emma and it caused a sharp pang in her chest. If Henry noticed, he didn't say anything as he went back to finishing up his cereal quickly and quietly. She didn't have to remind him for once to rinse out his bowl before placing it in the top rack of the dishwasher and he wandered off to his room to spend some time playing his video games or reading comics before Regina would drive him over to his grandparents' for a visit.

Without paying much thought, she made herself a cup of coffee and another for Emma. She brought it up to the third floor, only unlocking the door when she was certain Henry was otherwise preoccupied in his room. She walked up the stairs quietly, careful not to spill a drop of coffee despite the fact that both hands were shaking slightly. She made it to the top of the stairs and exhaled sharply before stepping past the barrier.

She wasn't surprised to find the main room empty, but what surprised her was the container of food she'd brought up the night before was empty and rinsed out and drying in the sink. She placed both mugs on the table, noticing the Polaroid she'd left there was no longer there. She sighed and licked over her lips before making her way to the closed bedroom door, knowing Emma was in there since the bathroom door was wide open and the lights were off.

"Emma?" Regina asked and she lifted a hand to knock, but stopped short when she heard a soft whimper just beyond the door. She was hesitant to open the door, but she did so quietly and peered inside.

"No," Emma gasped from the bed and Regina pushed the door open a little more and saw her tossing and turning on top of the sheets in only a black lacy bra and a thong that left very little to the imagination. "No, stop it, please!"

"Emma?" Regina asked a little louder and she rapped her knuckles against the door, startling Emma awake. "I've brought you some coffee. Get dressed."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Emma gasped as she sat up in the bed and placed a hand against her chest. Her whole demeanour changed in an instant and she stretched out languidly on the bed with a salacious smile curling over her lips. "Since you so rudely interrupted my dream, perhaps we can continue where it left off, hmm?"

"I doubt that was a dream, dear, because it sounded much more like a nightmare. And," she paused as she allowed herself a moment to take in Emma's lean form, "as enticing as the offer is, I must decline."

"Pity," Emma smirked and blew her a kiss just as she turned on her heels and walked back towards the kitchenette.

Regina let out the breath she was holding as soon as she picked up her mug of coffee. Her dreams definitely didn't do Emma justice, at least not the ones where she could see her body and not just feel it. She felt her whole body flush in arousal that she quickly tried to shake when she heard Emma emerge from the bedroom just moments later and thankfully, for her sake, fully dressed aside from the leather jacket that still laid out on the covered sofa.

Emma had a self-satisfied smirk on her face as Regina nodded towards the mug on the table. Emma picked it up and gave it a small sniff before placing it back down on the table. She crossed her arms over her chest and stared Regina down.

"I'm not trying to poison you," Regina said and she rolled her eyes and Emma's indigent scoff. "I left it black for that very reason."

"Black," she sneered. "Like my soul? Like my heart will be eventually?"

"Emma—"

"It's fine," she smirked as she picked the mug up again and took a small sip. "At least it doesn't taste like garbage. It tastes…good."

Regina rolled her eyes again. "You're welcome."

"Aren't you just a ball of sunshine in the morning, Gina," Emma chuckled dryly, her smirk not disappearing in the slightest.

"What the hell did you just call me?"

"Gina," Emma drawled and Regina shook with anger and took a step back from Emma and towards the stairs. "Running away again, are you?"

"I have things to do today," Regina replied tersely. "Enjoy your coffee, Swan."

Regina's thoughts were racing through her mind and she rushed down the stairs, spilling half of her coffee from the mug as she yanked open the door and slammed it shut behind her. She took the key from her pocket and locked it, pocketing the key just as she heard the floor creak behind her.

"Mom, what were you doing up there?" Henry asked and Regina exhaled shakily when she turned to face her always and ever curious son. "Mom?"

"I went up to check to see if I had any other books tucked away," she said carefully, knowing if she said much else that he would see right through her lie. "I must have already gotten them down. Come on, are you just about ready to head over to visit with your grandparents, dear?"

"Yeah, I guess so," he shrugged. "I thought you didn't keep any of your books up in the attic, Mom?"

"It just slipped my mind," she sighed and she led the way down the stairs, frowning as she dumped the remainder of her coffee in the sink in the kitchen before grabbing her purse and her keys. "Don't forget to grab your warmer jacket, Henry. It's getting colder outside in the afternoons now and I'm certain you'll be going to the park with them and the baby at some point today."

"Okay!" Henry called out from the foyer where she found him digging through the coat closet, emerging only when he found his wool jacket and slipped it on. Regina sighed as she walked over to him and fixed the collar. "It's a little tight."

"Yes, I suppose it is, dear. Tomorrow we'll get you a new jacket for the fall. You'll need it," she said and she reached up to brush aside his bangs that nearly covered his eyes and he groaned. "I believe there will also be a haircut on the agenda for tomorrow as well, dear. It's getting quite long."

"Mom," he groaned with a roll of his eyes and yet the small smile she caught skirting over his lips before he turned away from her to pull his shoes on told her that he still loved that motherly attention she gave him, especially with Emma not being around.

Regina glanced up the stairs and frowned. It was only a matter of time before Henry would figure out that she was holding Emma captive in their very own house and literally right under his nose. When that happened, she just had to hope that the fallout would be minimal and that he would understand.

[X]

Regina avoided the third floor all together when she returned from dropping Henry off at the Charming's loft. She retreated to her study and went through some of the books she hadn't been through in a while, looking for answers that still weren't there, at least not in the particular books she was thumbing furiously through.

She hadn't had much time before to ponder about the way Emma had called her "Gina", not when she had been so careless and had slammed the stairwell door, alerting Henry in the process. But when she tired of thumbing through one useless book after another, she tossed them onto the edge of the sofa before running her fingers through her hair, a frustrated sigh falling past her lips as her mind reeled right back to her dream she'd unexpectedly woken from at the worst possible moment.

It should've been like that the first time.

Regina shook her head. It just wasn't possible. It had only been nothing but a dream, all of it just a figment of her imagination and nothing more. If that was truly the case, she argued with her thoughts, then why would Emma call her what she did in her dream?

She pinched the bridge of her nose and rose from the sofa, grabbing the tumbler of whiskey and two of her crystal glasses before halting and putting them back. After a quick trip into the kitchen for glasses she could care less if they were broken for one reason or another, she climbed the stairs to the second floor and stood outside the third floor stairwell door for a good ten minutes before shaking her head and placing the tumbler and the glasses on the floor and stalked into her bedroom.

The dagger, she thought as she struggled for a moment to remember what she'd done with it and a deep frown etched into her lips as she pulled it out from underneath her pillow. She shook slightly at the knowledge that it hadn't been protected since the middle of the night and that anyone could've gotten their hands on it if they had bothered to try. She placed it back in the safe box in her closet and when she waved her hands over the box to place it under a protection spell, she paused midway through.

The dagger had been under her pillow as she'd slept and while she'd been dreaming, the very same dagger that was now all too connected to Emma. Sure, she had dreamt of Emma before, but they never held conversation aside from a few quips from Emma, but nothing that would be considered conversation, not like the one they'd had. Previous dreams hadn't felt that real, maybe on occasion and on rather lonely nights, but she had never been able to feel the heat from Emma's body, or the weight of her hand in her own, or the softness of her skin.

She shook her head and finished the spell before casting another around her closet. She was just exhausted, that's all it was, and her exhaustion was taking its toll on her body. She convinced herself as she walked out to the stairwell door that Emma was simply playing games with her and finding new ways to push her buttons until she snapped.

"You're back," Emma smirked when she reached the top step and she returned the smirk and stepped past the barrier. "Going to run away when you get scared of me again?"

"No."

"So," Emma purred as she circled around her, each step taken so fluidly that if Regina hadn't glanced down at her heeled boots for a moment, she wouldn't been convinced that she was floating. "So, you came up for a drink?"

"I thought we could both use one," Regina shrugged nonchalantly. "Or does whisky taste like dirt and garbage to you too?"

"Quite the opposite," Emma laughed. "Is that the one I had yesterday? The one that tastes like scotch, hmm?"

"Yes."

"Perfect," Emma said and she licked over her lips slowly, taking the tumbler from Regina's hand and one of the glasses she'd juggled in the other. "Are you back to your cheery old self now, Regina?"

Regina ignored her and clenched her jaw. She watched her pour herself a glass then grabbed Regina's and placed it on the table. She poured her some, just under half, before raising her own towards Regina and downed what was in the glass right back.

"Where is my dagger?" Emma asked as she slammed the glass down on the table.

"It's not yours."

"It has my name on it now, doesn't it?" Emma asked, cocking her head to the side and looking at Regina with a challenging glint in her eyes. "If it has my name on it, that makes it mine."

Regina sipped her drink and paused, her eyes not leaving Emma's before she downed the rest of it and placed it down gently on the table. "Do you honestly believe I would just give it to you?"

"No," she chewed out. "Because what's the fun in that, huh, Gina? You used to love playing games, didn't you? Show the peasants who had the power, who was in control. You won't make me beg, will you, Your Majesty?"

"Are you going to pour another drink, Emma?" Regina asked darkly.

Emma chuckled before reaching for the tumbler and instead of pouring the whisky into her glass she placed the top against her lips and took a quick swig, holding it out to Regina who just looked at her in disgust. "Oh, do I have cooties now?"

"Stop it, Emma, you're acting like a petulant child."

"Careful now," she warned. "You haven't seen me when I get angry and trust me," she said tightly as she forced the tumbler into Regina's hand. "You don't want me to get angry. You have no idea what I am capable of, Regina. Now take a drink. I want to play a game."

"What kind of a game?"

"Drink."

Regina took the smallest of sips that she could manage and placed the tumbler beside the glasses on the table. "What kind of a game do you want to play, Emma? What are your terms?"

"Oh," she chortled and pointed at her. "You're down for this, aren't you?" Emma clapped her hands together excitedly. "Tell me something, Gina, have you ever played a drinking game before?" Upon her silence, Emma laughed again and it sent shivers down her spine, shivers she couldn't quite fight off. "My terms are this. You don't get to leave until this bottle is done and boy, this stuff is pretty fucking potent, so you better hope you can make it to the end. Wouldn't want to black out in the presence of the Dark One, now would you?"

"Any other terms?" Regina asked through clenched teeth. Emma clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and Regina pulled out the chair at the table and sat down, Emma following suit a moment later. "What is this game we're playing then?"

"I'll let you choose. Here are your choices," Emma said and she held up her left index finger. "One, "never have I ever", a rather popular game of choice." Regina just rolled her eyes and Emma lifted up her middle finger. "Or we can play "would you rather" which is a personal favourite of mine. It is your choice, Gina. What is it going to be?"

Regina bit her bottom lip, knowing she had to make a choice, but how could she make a choice when she had played neither of those games, much less had ever heard of them before now. Emma wiggled her two fingers at her, a playful smirk curling over her lips as she waited.

"Clock is ticking, my patience is wearing thin. What is it going to be?"

"Never have I ever."