Author: TammyC
December 2006
Title: Home Alone: Lost In Trenton - chapter 4
Rating: PG - these are kids, but oh, what kids!
Spoilers: Possible up to Twelve Sharp
Disclaimer: I own nothing, just borrowing characters and having fun. Not making any money. Characters belong to JE.
A/N: This follows the basics of Home Alone, with a few other Christmas movie treats thrown in, as well as parts of my diary/blog (as usual)

Home Alone
Lost In Trenton

Chapter 4

A flood of children crowded around the front window outside the toy store. The display looked magical. A Christmas tree stood tall at the center. Its tips were flocked with white. Bright colorful lights hugged the boughs and blinked to the Christmas tunes playing. Around the bottom, a train hummed along a circular track. Popular toys were tucked around the tree, inside and outside the track.

Carlos and Tank stood in awe, taking in the scene. Tank pointed to a G.I. Joe doll that was still in its package.

"That's what I really want for Christmas," he said. "What are you hoping for?"

"I did want a Batman and a Batmobile," Carlos sighed. "But right now I think I just want my family back."

"Your family back? What happened to them?" Tank asked.

Carlos hung his head. "We were fighting, and I wished they'd disappear. And at a gas station, they did. I looked in the store, even, but they weren't there. That's when the Chocolate Bandits stole the car I was in."

Tank rubbed his near-bald head. "Huh," he said. "I didn't know people could just go poof like that."

"They can't," a boy said.

Carlos turned to his left and saw the boy named Joe. "How do you know?" Carlos asked. "I mean, for sure?"

Joe puffed his chest out. "Cause I'm nine years old," he said. "So I know lots of stuff that younger kids don't."

"Wow," Carlos said. He felt him self pushed aside a little.

"He don't know anything, cause he's just a dumb boy." A girl around Carlos' age wriggled her way in between Tank and Carlos. She was dressed in a Wonder Woman outfit. Her wild curly hair twirled down to the center of her back. Her eyes were a deep blue.

"Hey," Tank said. "What do you have against boys? I'm a boy, too."

"Are you dumb?" she asked.

"No," Tank said. "I'm smart."

Wonder Woman placed her hands on her hips. "Well, then, you're not a dumb boy. But Joe still is."

Joe leaned around Carlos. "I am not," he told Wonder Woman. "I now more stuff than you do."

"Oh, yea?" she asked. "Like what?"

Joe stood up a little taller. "I know how to pee in a bottle," he said proudly. "And I know Santa isn't real."

Hmmm. He had a point with the bottle. She'd have to try that when she got home. But Santa? He just didn't know what he was talking about.

"He is too real," she argued.

"Nope," Joe insisted. "Cause I got coal in my stocking last year."

Wonder Woman wagged her finger under Joe's nose. "That's because you aren't potty trained. You pee in bottles."

Joe waved her finger away. Hmmm. But she had a point about the bottle.

"I'm Carlos," he told the girl. "And that's Tank. What's your name?"

She smiled her pretty smile. "Well, most people just call me Wonder Woman."

Joe leaned in slightly between Carlos and the girl. "No they don't," Joe informed her. "Your name is Stephanie."

She shook her finger under his nose again. "Joe, you aren't supposed to call me that," she snapped.

"Why not?" Carlos asked. "I think Stephanie is a pretty name."

Stephanie cupped her hand to her mouth and whispered into Carlos' ear. "That's my secret identity."

Carlos nodded, understanding.

Tank felt a tug on his sleeve. He glanced down to find Lula staring up at him.

"Hi, Tank," Lula said. "Did you find Santa, yet? Cause it's real important to find Santa and let him know about the kidnappers. Kidnappers are bad."

Tank shook his head. "Nope. Still looking for him."

Joe rolled his eyes. "I told you, he isn't real."

"He is too real. And we have to find him and save him from the kidnappers."

"Wow," Stephanie said. "Can we help?"

Joe waved his hands in the air in exasperation. "There's no Santa, and there's no kidnappers," he said.

Stephanie unhooked a golden colored rope from her utility belt. "There's one way to tell for sure," she said. She wrapped the rope around Carlos' waist. "This is my magical lasso of truth. Carlos, is Santa real?"

"Yes," Carlos answered.

"And are there really kidnappers after Santa?" she asked.

"Yes, I told you," Carlos said.

Joe scoffed. "Oh, well, that proves it, doesn't it?"

Stephanie pulled the rope away from Carlos. "Joe, you can't lie with my magical golden lasso of truth," she said. "Here, I'll prove it." She wrapped the cord around Joe's waist. "Joe, do you play choo-choo in your garage?"

"Uh...yes," Joe said. "Dang, that thing really works."

Tank turned around and saw Lula talking to Benny and Eddie a few yards away. Benny had her by the arm, and she was trying to pull away.

"Come on," Benny said. "Just one little kiss, and then you can go."

"Okay," Lula said. "But you have to close your eyes. Cause that's how they do it in the movies. They close their eyes. Mama says that's cause you don't have to see how ugly they are when you kiss them. Cause if you see how ugly they are, you won't want to kiss them. And if you don't want to kiss them..."

"Okay, okay. We get the point," Eddie said. "So, which one of us are you gonna kiss?"

Tank was at Lula's side. "How about you boys close your eyes," Tank said. "That way you can find out who she picks."

The boys closed their eyes and puckered their lips.

Lula reached up and snagged Tank's ear. She gave it a tug and pulled him down to her level."Tank," she whispered in his ear. "I don't wanna kiss these boys. I was gonna run away when they closed their eyes. Cause mama says you shouldn't be kissing boys unless you really like them. Cause they might get ideas and think you like them and..."

"Shhh!" Tank whispered back. "Just trust me, Lula." He winked at her.

"Okay, boys, Lula made her choice. You boys ready?"

Benny and Eddie bobbed their heads up and down. Tank took the doll from Lula's arms and grinned. This was going to be great. He pressed the doll to Benny's lips, and then to Eddie's. Both boys opened their eyes wide.

Benny's eyes narrowed at Lula. "Why, you little..."

Benny and Eddie stepped forward, but Tank blocked their path. Carlos and Joe stepped up beside Tank. Stephanie grabbed the doll and Lula's hand and dragged her away to safety. Benny and Eddie tried to follow, but the other three boys would not budge.

"I hope you learned a lesson. Good boys don't go around kissing all the girls. Isn't that right, Joe?" Tank asked.

Joe startled. "They don't?" He recovered quickly. "Oh, yea, they don't. Bad boys, both of you."

Tank walked away with Carlos and Joe close on his heals.

Eddie called to Lula. "We'll get you, my pretty. And your little doll, too."

"Not today, boys," Tank flung over his shoulder.

"Where's your mama, Lula?" Carlos asked.

"I don't know," Lula said. "She was busy trying to get beautiful in that store we were in. Cause she don't feel beautiful anymore. I think it's just cause she's so huge. But that's because she's having a baby soon. If it's a boy..."

"Man," Joe mumbled to Stephanie, "and I thought you talked a lot."

Stephanie elbowed him lightly in the ribs while smiling.

Tank covered Lula's mouth with his hand. "What's your mama's name?" he asked her. "Maybe we can have the mall page her."

"Her name is Mama, silly," Lula said. "Cause that's what we call her. Cause..."

Carlos put his hand over Lula's mouth and smiled. "Okay, what does your daddy call your mama?" He asked. This should get the answer they were looking for.

Lula was actually silent for a moment as she was thinking. Then she grinned. "Broad," she said. "Her name is Dumb Broad."

Joe shook his head and glanced at Stephanie. She wasn't speaking. Her eyes were wide open and her jaw was dropped open.

"Wow," Joe told Stephanie. "You're speechless. That's a first."

Tank grabbed Lula by the hand and tugged her along. "Come on," he said. "I guess you can stay with us til we find her."

Lula's face lit up. "Okay," she said. "Maybe we can find Santa, too."

"I'm coming, too," Stephanie said.

"Me, too," Joe said.

"I thought you didn't believe in Santa," Stephanie taunted.

"Well, it won't hurt to try, right?" Joe asked. He reached out for Stephanie's hand. "Besides, if my folks ask why I wandered off, I can tell them I'm helping you find your mom."

Lula started skipping at a slow pace. "Goodie," she said. "And we got to find Santa and warn him about those kidnappers. Cause those kidnappers are no good. They wouldn't even help me tie my shoe. And if they get Santa, they'll ruin Christmas. And Christmas is a special time of year, my mama says..."

Carlos and Tank groaned.

Joe and Stephanie dropped back a few from the others.

"I hope we find her mama soon," Joe whispered. "She talks more than even you do."

Stephanie rolled her eyes and then gave Joe a wink.

To Be Continued...