RVB Arrancars Chorus
Heavy Mettle!
Di-Roy is seen depressingly walking across the canyon
Di-Roy: Depression. Loneliness. Confusion. Slight indigestion. Oh Skullak... Ah, I miss you so much! 'Who is supposed to be my best friend while you are gone?! Rey?! That guy isn't even a shade of blue! It's like an... aqua.
A sound occurs. Di-Roy looks over to the sound's direction.
Di-Roy: Hello? Um... 'Who's there? Rey is that you? Agent Washington? HELLO!
Echo: HELLO!
Di-Roy: Oh, that was just me, that was stupid. (yells) Have a nice day!
Echo: THANKS, YOU TOO!
Di-Roy: Well, I am a very pleasant person.
Di-Roy walks over towards the noise.
Di-Roy: Okay, me, you can cut it out now! This is getting a little silly. (he spots something) Hello...
Cut to Washington instructing Rey.
Washington: Rey... in basic training, there is a point when the drill sergeant attempts to "break" his or her soldiers so that they may overcome their civilian mindset and focus on the responsibility and selflessness of becoming a true soldier.
Rey: Uh, bro. I went through basic ages ago! True soldier, standing right here!
Washington: What's the UNSC motto?
Rey: When in doubt, rub one out.
Washington: I am going to break you... Private Rey.
Rey: Ooh, I'm shaking in my armor.
Washington: Inside this tunnel is an elaborate obstacle course designed to test both your reflexes and your mettle.
Rey: Uhh... like... copper?
Washington: No, that's metal. I said "mettle".
Rey: Whatever.
Washington: On your mark... get set...
Rey: This is such bull...
Wash shoots Rey's leg.
Rey: SHIT OW! OKAY! I'M GOING!
Tey races through the obstacle course. First, he attempts to shoot down two cones positioned on the side.
Rey: Stupid fucking cones! (After destroying an obstacle with his Energy Sword, he lands on a group of mines.) Jesus Christ! (Runs through the Halo 4 level "Reclaimer".) Oh god where is this coming from?! (Emerges, somehow, in the "Warthog Run" section of the Halo: Combat Evolved level "The Maw," running down Flood Combat Forms.) Who are these people? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! (finally emerges from the obstacle course.)
Washington: Congratulations, Private. That time was... adequate... for a beginner.
Rey: (exhausted) What was... I don't...
Washington: Just an adrenaline rush Rey. It'll wear off.
Rey: I'm...
Washington: Shaking in your armor?
Di-Roy is seen anxiously running by.
Di-Roy: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy... Hello, hello!
Washington: Di-Roy! Glad to see you're feeling better! I've got a little exercise for you! Inside this cave is an elaborate obstacle course, designed to...
Di-Roy quickly races through and completes the obstacle course offscreen in about two seconds. He then leaves.
Di-Roy: Okay, that was fun! Gotta go do stuff! Don't ask questions! Thank you, goodbye!
Washington: I think that's enough training for today.
Rey: Yeah.
Washington: Uh I'm gonna go work on the Comm Tower.
Wash leaves.
Rey: Yeah.
Cut to Red base where Nirgge is seen. Findor approaches him.
Findor: Hey roomie, uh you got a second for me?
Nirgge: Sup?
Findor: Oh, you know, not much, not much... Uh... Oh, so, question for you...
Nirgge: Uh huh.
Findor: By any chance have you seen my toothbrush?
Nirgge: Uhhh. I don't think so.
Findor: Okay Okay, you sure?
Nirgge: Yeah.
Findor: Huh 'cause I'm pretty sure I saw you with it earlier.
Nirgge: Dude, you're acting weird.
Findor: Huh... What... What do you mean?
Nirgge: I mean... clearly you're accusing me of using your toothbrush, but instead of just coming out and saying it you're being really passive aggressive and tiptoeing around the accusation.
Findor: Huh.
Nirgge: You did the same thing when I left the lights on and when I put my boots on your side of the room.
Findor: Mhmm.
Nirgge: And I feel that there's this constant tension growing between us that's inevitably going to erupt over what would normally be considered a small issue.
Findor: Yeah... Well... You know I wouldn't be asking you about my toothbrush if I hadn't seen you with it earlier.
Nirgge: I used your toothbrush.
Findor: YOU FUCK! (Findor aims his rifle at Nirgge.)
Nirgge: DUDE! What's wrong with you?!
Findor: What's wrong with me? What's wrong with YOU?! You keep stacking dishes in the sink! I don't even think you've eaten off of some of them! For all I know, you're doing it because you're FUCKING BORED!
Nirgge: Wait, isn't the sink just where dishes go?
Findor: NO! They go on the cupboard!
Nirgge: We have a cupboard?!
Baraggan confronts the two.
Baraggan: Hey! Keep it down in there! I'm trying to watch my stories!
Findor: Sarge, please tear down the wall! I can't take Nirgge's laziness in small spaces!
Baraggan: I'm sorry, Findor. But we all have to make sacrifices... Except for me because I'm in charge.
Nirgge: Hey Findor, this probably isn't the best time to say this but, uh we're out of toilet paper.
Findor: What?! HOW?!
Cut to the Blue team's tank wrapped in toilet paper. Cut back to the Reds.
Nirgge: I dunno.
Washington: I believe you borrowed my toolbox.
Findor: What do you need a toolbox for?
Washington: Repairing the Comm Tower. I know you three are having fun playing house, but I'd really rather leave this place.
Baraggan: Playing house?! Son... this is a highly- Whoops, forgot to use the door!
Washington: The toolbox.
Nirgge: Upstairs.
Washington: Show me.
Nirgge leads Wash to his room.
Nirgge: Fine... But don't touch any of my stuff!
Washington: (off screen) Ugh, this place is a pig sty.
Nirgge: It's not a pig sty Wash, it's a way of life.
Findor: Hey Sarge, didn't we recover an old robot-building kit from the crash?
Baraggan: Sure did! Makes a great foot rest! I like to prop my feet up while I'm watching my stories.
Findor: Well, if we were to re purpose the robot's radio transmitter for the Comm Tower, we might be able to-
Baraggan: Findor, I'm going to have to stop you before your terrible plan becomes any more terrible.
Findor: Oh...
Baraggan: Fortunately, I believe we may be able to use this robot kit to build some sort of robot! We could put it to work constructing a radio transmitter and then the Comm Tower would be fixed in no time!
Findor: Well, don't you think it would be better if-
Baraggan: Not at all! Let's build a robot!
Findor: I hate them.
Washington: (off screen) Are those my socks?
Nirgge: (off screen) Yeah... but you probably don't want those back.
Findor: I hate all of them.