AN: So sorry for the delay, my nephew was up for the weekend so…it was pretty much "Dominick weekend", if you know what I mean. We almost went to Chuckie Cheese. Yikes.
AN2: I really don't own anything, except for peripheral characters and, I suppose, the theme.
"It's all right, you can change it back with magic, right?" Sarah said, not nearly as worried as she had been before when she thought nothing had been pre-arranged for the week.
Jareth casually tossed a crystal and grinned down at his wife. "Of course. You and your holidays. I can never get them straight!"
Sarah smiled back and turned to gaze at her new utterly human living room.
The window, however, was still covered with snow and frost. And it seemed to be increasing by the moment.
"Um, Jareth? The weather?" Sarah nodded at the window.
"You ask so much of me. Why can't we just have a snow holiday? It will keep everyone inside. It's snowing in the real Colorado, isn't it?" Jareth stretches his neck first to the right, then to the left, releasing tension.
"Yes…but not ten feet. How will we explain that it's only two feet in the Aboveground, but when they get into our house, it's ten outside?" Sarah pointed out logically.
"Son of a Goblin's Uncle. Really, Sarah? What is it with you and this 'logic' excrement?" Jareth huffed and the irritation began to show in his face.
"Aw, Jareth, you're so cute." Sarah laughed a little as she reached up to pat his cheek. "It's crap, not excrement. You'll have to at least match the Aboveground weather. Though I'm sure the aunts will be soused, even they might notice."
Jareth let out a heavy sigh. He began to straighten his collar and gave a fluff to his hair. "I have to go renegotiate. Which of the triplets are we willing to give to Boreas to change the direction of the north wind, again? I'll be back by lunch, dear. Don't work too hard." The last bit was imparted with heavy sarcasm and he vanished before Sarah could swat him.
Sarah inspected the room a little closer, just to make sure that all remnants of Christmas were gone. She noticed a single present on the floor, wrapped prettily with silver paper and blue ribbon.
"Aw, he can be so sweet sometimes." Sarah said softly to herself as she walked across the room, then stooped awkwardly to get the present.
"Oof, I'm getting too big for this!" Sarah mumbled to herself as she sat on one of the new sofas, the fireplace warming her side.
Sarah quickly looked left and then right, making sure that there were no random goblins spying on her. After being assured that she was alone…she tore into the packaging like there would never be another present as long as she would live until the end of the world. Bits of paper flew into the air, the ribbon managed to catch on fire in the fireplace, going up in a noxious poof of smoke that went unnoticed by the small child hidden in the grown up's body.
"Oooh, another present." Nestled inside the larger box was a smaller one, this one wrapped in gold paper with a pretty red ribbon. She tore into this smaller one no less carefully and opened the cardboard lid with no hesitation.
Nestled inside the tissue was a perfect, ripe peach, much like the peach Jareth had given Sarah during her trek through the Labyrinth. Next to the peach was a little folded note, presumably from Jareth.
"My dearest wife,
I liked you better when you were drugged. Eat this and call me in the morning.
-J
"That no-good, petulant-child, big-haired, jerk!" Sarah stood up quickly (well, as quickly as a woman in her second trimester carrying triplets could) and threw the peach into the fire.
Several hours later, roundabout noontime, Sarah made her way to the kitchen with the intention to check on dinner preparations. Attached to the waistband of her maternity jeans was the Kavanaugh's 'house phone'...or the only phone to her knowledge that could receive and send calls between the Underground and Aboveground. Just in case one of her family members called, she could be ready at a moment's notice.
"Cook? How are things coming? Uh, cook? Is that you?" Apparently Jareth's glamour had spread to the staff; the five kitchen workers were smocked and appropriately dressed…and about four feet taller than usual.
Their facial features weren't too terribly different, but (shallow Sarah thought), who would really be looking closely at the hired help? Would it be unheard of to have hired a family of reformed cannibals from the Arizona desert?
Ok, ok, they didn't look that bad. They were just…different. Their skin was a bit yellow, their eyes a bit far apart, and, most noticeable of all, their noses looked like putty squished by a child and plopped onto their faces. But not too abnormal. Really.
"Yes, yes. All is fine. I have instructions. You want food now? Good, you sit. Here." Cook had something of a stream of consciousness moment where she carried on a completely one-sided conversation that ended in putting a plate of stew, a spork, and a glass of milk in front of a then-seated Sarah.
"All right, then. How do you like the new glamour?" Sarah asked as she reached for the spork with her left hand and the glass of milk with her right. She was attempting to get better at multi-tasking before the triplets came along.
"I look ugly. Too tall, the ground too far away. King say that we be normal when we go home for day." Sarah was used to fractured conversation with the goblin help and was unfazed by the mismatched conjugations.
"Ah. This stew is good! Did you add something new?"
"King say to use more chia seeds. Says they good for you."
"Lord, Jareth." Sarah rolled her eyes, but kept eating, the stew disappearing rather quickly.
"Did you get extra help for this week, Cook? I'm afraid that my family may be too demanding for you…" Sarah drained the rest of her milk, taking a quick look at Cook over the rim. Cook was kneading honey colored bread, presumably for dinner rolls. She added a handful of seeds (of course chia seeds) and kneaded the dough a little more before pulling out the rolling pin.
"Yes. King hired more goblins from village. They be here tomorrow to clean. King pay them extra beer and they happy."
"Ah, yes, beer. Um, could you make sure that my aunts don't have too much of the beer? The watered down wine is fine, but the beer might be too much for them." Sarah pulled herself up from the stool she had eaten at and made her way to the sinks with her plate and glass.
"Ack! Put that down, Lady! You no carry anything." Before Sarah could raise a half-hearted protest, the 'home phone' began to ring and Cook snatched the dinnerware out of her hands.
As she attempted to unclasp the phone from her waist, Jareth popped into the room. He unclipped the phone and pressed the talk button before Sarah could even snap her fingers to retrieve the phone.
"Kavanaugh residence!" Jareth said merrily into the phone.
"Why, hello Aunt Gaby! Er, Gabrielle!" Jareth turned his back on Sarah, striding out of the kitchens.
Sarah, of course, followed him into the new living room, after waving good-bye to the cook staff.
"Well, that's no good. We'll be there to get you in the SUV shortly. Just sit tight. Oh, the other aunts are with you? Fine, we'll make sure we have room. See you soon. Stay put." Jareth clicked the phone off before Sarah could snatch it from his hands.
"Jareth! You were supposed to let me answer the phone today!" Sarah pouted, crossing her arms over her stomach.
"Don't be whiny, honey, it does nothing for your complexion." Jareth said as he clipped the phone to his now-normal belt. Sarah noticed the rest of his attire as she glared at him – clean but worn jeans, a navy blue Colorado sweatshirt, and running shoes that Sarah would swore she'd never seen before.
"Oh, hush up, you big jerk. I'm allowed to be whiny, my ankles are swollen and I have to eat with a spork because Cook won't let me eat with a fork after the last time. My hand eye coordination is just not what it used to be. Another reason for me to be whiny!" Sarah tried to give reasonable explanations for her irrational behavior, knowing that she was just being a shrew because she could. It would have been more satisfying if her husband would respond to her snide comments, but he was, after all, the Goblin King. The King of sarcasm and royal jerk-ness.
"Yes, yes. Are you coming with me, or staying here to meet your relatives?" Jareth pulled on a black down-filled parka that he pulled out of nowhere and snapped his fingers for a pink Sarah-sized parka. He opened the jacket appealingly to Sarah.
"Coming with you to where? I thought they were going to get a taxi from the airport?" Sarah shrugged into the garment as she sought more information.
"Well, there's been a slight problem with the weather. Cars without four wheel drive may not make it from the airport to our house Aboveground." He pulled out a pair of leather driving gloves and made short work of pulling them on.
"But I thought it was only supposed to snow a few more inches today? That can't be too terribly bad." He snapped again and a cute white knit cap appeared in his hand. He pulled it on over Sarah's brown locks as she suspiciously looked up at him.
"Well, the negotiations with Boreas went well. He did agree to even out the weather between here and there. Unfortunately…are you ready honey? I'll just pop us up to the garage. I had a goblin start the car, it should be warm by now." At her brief nod, they were transported to the garage Aboveground, into the large black Escalade with huge snow tires and spacious seating.
"Unfortunately, what, Jareth!?" Sarah asked exasperatedly as she buckled her seat belt.
"Unfortunately he decided to be a smart ass and dumped two feet of snow up here now, and after we get your family, he'll dump another three feet. You know, to even out the weather. It was either that or he really did want one of our triplets. I compromised."
"Oh, Jareth. This is going to be interesting…" Sarah glanced back as the garage door began to slowly lift and snow blew into the garage.
"I'm just going to close my eyes until we get there. Make sure you stay on the road, honey." Sarah reclined her chair slightly and relaxed against the soft leather, absolutely confident that her husband would get to the airport without a problem. After all, he could make cars fly, right?