Everyday People
"Sly and the Family Stone"
Neeshka
Kiara cussed as her out-of-the-blue stab at the imposing guardian's adamantine kneecap, unsurprisingly, had no effect whatsoever. She stood back, appraising the meagre scrape she'd accomplished, stroking her fingers along her chin in deep contemplation as she did so. She seemed genuinely surprised that she'd caused little to no damage.
"Do you think its kneecaps will be immune to sneak attacks, Neeshka?" she asked me from over her shoulder.
I smirked, not even bothering to offer a reply.
Sand sighed from his place a few steps back, as if expecting such idiotic and barbaric behaviour from our leader.
"Dear girl, the guarding of Ammon Jerro's haven, with the really large sword, might I add, is not asking us to complete brain surgery in a self built rocket. This being a good thing as I don't particularily relish at the thought of you hooligans operating on me, being that I obtain the only brain in the given vicinity."
Mid rant I began to wonder how he completed such long winded speeches. He truly must practice them beforehand. Yet he still wasn't finished yet, it seemed.
"The three tasks he has assigned to us are simple," he concluded, "Much like our dear Grobnar here."
The gnome gave a small satisfied smile at the mentioning of his name.
Kiara's face lit up in a devious smirk, and I could practically hear the clogs within her head clunking until they'd jammed completely, bringing her to her final decision.
"If it's so simple, I'm sure you'll have no problem completing the three tasks on your own then, yeah?"
Sand's face paled instantly, a great feat on his behalf given that his skin was practically translucent to begin with, and he offered a slight frown. He was, for once, completely and gratifyingly speechless.
"You can't let him hog all of the killing," the barrel headed dwarf objected forcefully, shaking his bloodless axe for emphasis. "It's a crime for me axe to not be completely soaked in blood yet at this time of day."
"I can and I most definitely will," Kiara replied simply.
"I, for one, like the plan," Bishop intervened with a lazy smirk.
Everyone turned to face the previously quiet ranger. He stood leaning against one of the guardian's large legs, itching disinterestedly at the stubble upon his chin.
"That's because it involves the wizard's inevitable death," Shandra, the pesky farm girl, spoke up.
She stood beside Kiara, but a foot away, as per usual. Our leader in question was trying to keep her distance from the aggravatingly clingy girl.
"Yeah, and that genuinely surprises you?" Bishop retaliated bluntly. "Go back to being a quiet little butt puppet, Key."
I smirked at the utmost look of hurt, quickly replaced by anger, that flashed across the girl's face at Bishop's new nickname for her.
She opened her mouth to retaliate but was abruptly cut off by Kiara's raised hand.
"Bishop, she is not just a key for us to use to get into Ammon Jerro's haven," Kiara surprisingly defended the girl.
I felt like asking if our leader was feeling alright, or getting Sand to cast some kind of anti-possession spell on her, just to be sure.
Kiara smirked as she continued, "Shandra is also an important meat shield for the group."
"Who knew; she has more than one use," I piped up. "This must be a proud moment for you, farmer's daughter."
"Shut your trap, tiefling," Khelgar rushed to the damsel's rescue.
I huffed indignantly in reply to the dwarf's curt attack.
"I do believe there was a certain bookworm due for a suicide mission, wasn't there?" Qara briskly reminded everyone, her lips pulled upward in a seething smirk.
She looked pointedly at Sand whom was trying desperately to blend in with his surroundings and remain forgotten.
"I thought you enjoyed the spotlight, Sand," Kiara stated pointedly, sheer mockery underlying her artificially sweetened tone.
"This calls for a tune to set him on his way," Grobnar sang merrily.
"What is sending Sand off on his own going to ultimately achieve, my lady?" Casavir's deep voice rumbled louder than that of everyone's complains which were in reply to Grobnar's previous statement.
Kiara narrowed her eyes, watching the large paladin pointedly, as if the answer was obvious. She sighed when he continued to await an answer expectantly.
"What does it achieve?" she repeated, "My overall amusement, that's what."
Bishop gave a low chuckle at the look of clear disgust worn upon the paladin's face.
Sand refused to move, his feet rooted to the spot.
Qara gave an amused hiss of laughter. "The very fact that you've yet to leave proves that you doubt your own skills, hedge wizard."
Sand gave an indignant huff, scowling at the young brat. "The very fact that you're travelling with us proves that Kiara is simply trying to get you killed, a more appealing alternative than having to put up with you serving, and spitting in, our food at the Sunken Flagon," was the elf's retaliation.
"The wind whispers of dangers, should Sand leave," Elanee spoke up.
It was weird hearing her voice; I was so used to the druid generally being left behind on missions due to her relentlessly annoying personality, voice, hair, and opinions.
She sat in the only patch of grass for miles; her slender leg's tucked beneath her and her hair perfect despite the constant breeze.
Kiara turned around, hands on her hips, a figure of authority.
"What have I told you about voicing your thoughts, druid?" she pressed in seriousness.
Casavir stepped forwards, heeding the elf's words whilst everyone else was too busy thinking; 'I thought we left Elanee at the Flagon, why in the nine hells is she with us?'
The paladin looked about him, as if the danger that Elanee had spoken of would jump out at us at any moment.
"What is the wind telling you?" he queried, his voice a hushed whisper.
Elanee frowned, as if greatly puzzled, her large slanted eyes emphasizing her bewilderment.
"How should I know? I don't speak wind," she stated simply.
Her statement was met with silence, Kiara rubbing the bridge of her nose whilst everyone, save Grobnar whom was obliviously strumming his lute, simply gaped at her with loose jaws.
I gave a small giggle, my tail twisting up before my mouth to conceal my growing smile. This was a colourful group I'd found myself a part of; I was no longer the odd one, I was no longer alone. Due to the god's having a warped sense of humour, we'd been brought together.
Then again, at the end of the day, it makes no difference what group we're in; we're everyday people. Well, we are if you ignore the fact that we're fighting an ancient evil and trying to get into an old warlock's haven who will probably kill us all… normal people stuff, right?
Moments passed and nothing else was said, everyone still gaping at the elf in wonder. Boredom was quick to settle in. Shaking my head I decided that I should say something, lest the disconcerting silence go on any longer.
"So, are we going to send Sand on his merry way, or are you testing out a new method and trying to kill off all of our enemies with boredom?" I piped up.
Shandra shook her head, clearly amazed that we were still serious about letting Sand complete the three trials that the guardian had set for us by himself.
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot," Kiara was shaken from her previous trance. "Take your pick, Sand; the ranger or the rogue? I saw some areas that you're going to need someone dexterous to help you through."
Damn, I might have to go too? I was looking forward to some time to wander around and see what I could find on my own. Then again, if it's just Sand and I, there'd be a bigger share of loot than usual for me.
"Oh hurray," Sand said dryly. "Do I want to be backstabbed by the ranger, or backstabbed, stolen from, and my ear talked off by the rogue? Choices, choices, choices."
I frowned; Sand's barbed words making me feel less and less like helping him. Bishop started to draw a bow from his quiver, a smile tugging at his lips.
"Why wait till we're gone for me to backstab you? How about we just get it out of the way, wizard?" Bishop stated.
Qara smirked in reply to Bishop's threat, obviously liking where this trail of conversation was heading.
Our leader waved her hands above her head, seeking the attention of everyone as people started to form an intimidating semi-circle of sorts around Sand.
"There'll be no killing of Sand, not until we get this whole Jerro mess out of the way, deal?" Kiara spoke up.
"First you say we can't kill the creatures guarding this place, and then you say we can't kill the bookworm?" Khelgar questioned, bushy brows hiding his eyes from sight in a deep frown.
This conversation wasn't going anywhere; Shandra would die from old age, the blood drying up within her body, before we would ever get around to using her to get into the haven. I raised my tail, arms crossed against my chest and my foot tapping impatiently.
"I'll go with him," I offered.
"Two annoying bird's with one stone," Bishop mused under his breath with a dark smirk.
"Bishop," Casavir sternly warned the darker man.
"Yeah?" the ranger replied. "What?"
The paladin looked as if he might take the ranger's bait and retaliate, but, taking a deep breath, he clenched his large fists, looking to the sky.
"Please, Tyr; grant me strength," he begged of his god.
"Well, whilst you guys are all busy asking the sky for help, talking to the wind, scratching your stubble, playing your lutes, being short, and bossing people around, Sand and I are off to go kick some butt," I stated, making to stand by the unusually silent wizard's side.
"Kiara, my dear girl, when I'm done with whatever creatures are involved in the three trials, you better hope that I've run out of spells for the day because I'll be coming after you next," Sand warned our leader with a level tone. "You might also want to keep a resurrection spell handy for our tiefling here, I can't promise my aim will be one hundred percent when I fire magic missiles today, I keep getting the surrounding dust in my eyes and my vision isn't perfect due to that."
"Hey, I'm trying to help you out here, wizard," I snapped, offended.
Grobnar chose then to speak up, as naive as ever. "Sir Sand, you do realise that you cannot miss your target with magic missile, correct?"
Sand gave a smug smile, turning and walking in the direction the guardian had pointed us in.
He gave a dry chuckle, "I know."
....
I hope you enjoyed that little ramble of silly banter; any and all reviews are appreciated.