A/N: Jasper's having a tough time, isn't he? It always surprised me that his past never once caught up with him. I mean, he was the Big Bad for a while, you would think that someone would remember it and want to use him for their own means.

Jasper

The seconds dragged on, becoming minutes and then an hour. Alice came, so I knew that it was after school, but my sense of time had become as distorted as the rest of my senses. As always, she seemed to know exactly what I needed, soothing me with gentle words and cool hands until some of the pain receded. But then she was gone, and there was nothing left but the darkness.

I couldn't get my eyes open, but I knew there was someone else in the room, someone strange. Normally I would have warned them off, but over a century of training had taught me not to start a fight I wasn't capable of finishing. Considering my current condition, playing possum seemed like a wise choice.

The strangers shifted and I recognized at least one scent. Rosalie. I whined softly, trying to tell her how badly I hurt, and begging her to do something, anything, to try and ease the pain. She ran her long fingers across my skin, wrist to elbow and back again. "I know. Do you think you can swallow something for me?"

Maybe. With a huge effort, I forced my eyes open and looked at her. Her dark eyes lit up when they met mine. "Don't fucking scare me like that! I've been sitting here worried to death about you."

All I could manage was an apologetic grimace. I knew she wasn't seriously angry, but I couldn't summon the energy to keep up my part of the game. Her hand moved from my forearm to the back of my neck before she pulled me upright. The change in position was dizzying, and I wished she had just left me alone. Something rattled and I saw her pouring pills into her hand.

"What?" My voice was raspy-sounding, reminding me of hours and days spent breathing the smoke created by burning newborns. I cleared my throat to try again, but Rose was already responding. "It's some sort of prescription aspirin. It should help with your fever. Bella's going to bring up some water for you."

So that was what that thumping sound was. Bella's heart grew even louder as she came down the hallway. She entered the room with a quick, nervous, smile, holding the glass with exaggerated care. I tried to smile back at her; after all, it wasn't her fault that she was scared of me or that I felt lousy.

Rose took the glass and looked at the pills in her hand. "Think they'll work faster if we crush them up?"

"Probably. I mean, he can't overdose on them, can he? It'll taste really, really bitter, though."

"Hmm. Maybe not. He's already puked once."

Now I was definitely hallucinating. Rosalie would never speak to Bella in such a civil tone. Either that or I really was dying and not just feeling like I was. Either way, things didn't look to good for me right now. My sister took advantage of my distraction to put a hand behind me head and put the glass to my lips. "Get a quick sip to start with, then I'll give you the pills."

She tipped the glass, and I had never been so grateful for the cool tastelessness of the liquid as I was at that second. I would have gulped the entire glass and begged for more, that was how low my pride had sunk, but Rose took it away before I got more than a few quick sips. "Quit it or you'll get sick again."

That seemed a small price to pay to get some liquid on my burning throat, but I knew better than to argue. In more than sixty years, I had never once been the victor in an argument with Rose. Most of the time, she just kept going until you found yourself agreeing with her just to get some peace.

My hand shook a little when I held it out for the pills. They were much smaller than I anticipated, small enough that I doubted they would do much, but I was desperate enough to try anything. I threw them into my mouth. Bella was right; they were rather disgustingly bitter. Luckily, Rose was right there with the glass and I was able to wash the taste out of my mouth.

We fell into a companionable silence then, while we all waited for the pills to have some effect. The pain, which had developed into a nonspecific ache which encompassed my entire body, didn't stop, but my mind became a bit clearer. Clear enough to be surprised at the absence of the one person I thought would definitely be here. "Alice?" I seemed to hurt less if I kept the words as small and brief as possible.

The girls exchanged looks, obviously unsure of what to say. Finally, Bella spoke. "She had a vision, so she took Edward and Emmett with her to check things out. I don't exactly know where they were going, but she thinks it might have something to do with why you're so sick. She'll be back really soon, though. I promise."

I smiled inwardly at the thought of being comforted by a girl nearly 150 years my junior, but I appreciated the thought nonetheless. I really did like Bella, with her bravery and willingness to jump right into a life that would have had most people running away at top speed. She would make a formidable vampire one day, if Edward ever let things get that far.

Granted, I tried to keep my distance from Bella, which I could tell bothered her, but it wasn't for the reasons she thought. I was no more attracted to her blood than I was to that of any other human, a fact that the rest of the family tended to forget. How could I be, when I had so much trouble distinguishing between the scents of two humans? It was one of those ways that my gift tripped me up. I was used to recognizing others by their emotional signature, which was as unique as a fingerprint. Thus, I had never really gotten used to using my other senses.

No, my issue with Bella's blood could more correctly be called my family's issues with Bella's blood. They were all attracted and aroused by it, feelings that were multiplied and transferred back to me. Without any way of blocking either their or my own emotions, I frequently lost it, something that had never once happened when I was alone, or when it was just me and Alice. That was the price I had to pay to be part of a larger family.

Not that that was a good excuse. After all, I had been dealing with my gift in one form or another for my entire life. It being difficult was no justification, especially when Bella's safety was at stake. So I kept my distance, for everyone's sake. I was still grateful for her presence now, though.

I wanted to ask more, but the darkness was starting to creep in around the edges of my vision again. Both Bella and Rosalie's movements became jerky and uncoordinated as my vision faded in and out. One second, Rose was next to the bed, then Bella was, then neither was, but the connecting seconds were gone.

Rose started humming softly, a lullaby I dimly remembered from several lifetimes ago. I let my eyes fall closed, the room turning dark and silent as each sense failed. Only this time, when I slept, I dreamed.

I was in the woods, moving at a fairly fast pace. If asked, I couldn't have told anyone my destination, but somehow, my feet found the correct path. It was as if my every instinct had come together, including the part that was still human, to show me the way. Landmarks flew past, but I paid them only the barest of attention. There was Edward and Bella's meadow; there was the little lake where Alice and I sometimes went skinny-dipping. I passed herds of deer, mountain lions, and even a bear with hardly a glance in their direction. Now was not the time to stop and feed, not when there was something far more important waiting for me.

The air thinned as I went up the mountain, smells becoming much more clear. I was close now, though what I was close to, I still had no idea. Finally, I broke through into a clearing. On the surface, it was no different from a dozen others I had already passed, but I stopped, standing still and waiting for . . . what, exactly?

Then I heard the voice. It was soft and reassuring, though there was a slight undertone that told me to be wary. A female, but then they could be just as dangerous as males. "Did you hear my call?"

"Yes." The word came out without any thought, though I couldn't recall hearing anything of the sort.

"Do you know why I've called you now?"

I took an unconscious step closer. The voice was definitely female, and becoming more familiar by the second. "No."

"I called you because it's time. You will come with me now."

I didn't want to go with this stranger, did I? No, I wanted to stay here, to be with my mate and my family. Even as I had that thought, I found myself stepping closer and closer, the Cullens fading from my mind.

"No." Somehow the word didn't come out nearly as strong as I had intended it to. "I won't go with you."

The voice laughed, and I recognized it in an instant. As impossible as it seemed, I knew it as if I had heard it yesterday, rather than decades before. I was too close to her now, and when her hand shot out to grip my neck, I couldn't move away in time. My lips formed the name, but she was squeezing me so tightly that I couldn't get enough air to speak it out loud. Her hand was small but distressingly strong, holding me at an angle that made it impossible to break free.

She spoke again, demanding that I submit and that my struggles cease, but I couldn't allow either of those things to happen. Sharp fingernails, very nearly talons, dug into the tender skin of my throat, the pain clearing my thoughts and giving me the strength to break free. I stumbled twice as I hit the woods, still under the influence of whatever had happened in the clearing, but I knew that if I didn't escape right now, I wouldn't escape at all.

"Should we chase him?" Another voice, a male one that I failed to recognize.

"No. He'll come back on his own. He won't be able to stop himself." The voice echoed through the suddenly silent woods, chilling in its certainty. I wouldn't come back here, not now and not ever, if I could help it. I dodged around a large tree, only to feel another pair of hands on my shoulders. I snapped hard, trying to free myself, jerking my body to the side at the same time.

"Jasper, knock that shit off!" This voice was familiar, too, but in a much more comforting way. I forced my eyes open, momentarily blinded by the lamp beside the bed. Still, I would have recognized that attitude anywhere. "Rose?"

"Yeah, your sister, the one you just tried to bite." She sounded pissed, but that was really just Rosalie's default expression. Her emotions told me she was a little bit angry, but mostly frightened for me. "You ripped my shirt."

Sure enough, there was a tear near the neckline. I started to apologize, but stopped, feeling like there was something I ought to be remembering. The details of the dream were gone, slipping through my fingers like grains of sand. The harder I tried to remember, the more blurry it became, until I was left with nothing but an image of the woods and a strong sense of foreboding.

Apparently she didn't expect me to speak, because she picked up the thermometer from the dresser and shoved it into my mouth with more force than was strictly necessary. A steady thumping from the corner told me that Bella was still there, but was wisely keeping out of range. Rose turned to her. "See? Say it to him just like that and he'll quit."

What? They must have had some girl talk while I was still out. Bella's phone beeped, and she fumbled picking it up. Bella smiled at us both. "Everyone else is on their way home."

Rose raised an eyebrow. "Did they find anything?"

"It didn't sound like it, but the reception was bad."

I waited for Rosalie to make a catty remark about the general weakness of the human race, but she just nodded. Bella turned her attention to me, coming much closer than she usually did. "Feeling any better?"

No, not really. Whether it was a reaction to the blood in her body, or just the fact that I was still unsettled by the dream, I was starting to feel sick. Again. I was too afraid to open my mouth and tell her that, though, so I just shrugged. Rose pulled the thermometer out of my mouth and looked at it. She had a great poker face, I had to give her that, but she couldn't mask her emotions, which were rapidly becoming anxious.

"This is bad, isn't it?" She held the thermometer out to Bella, twisting it so I couldn't see the display. Really, she needn't have bothered. I knew I was running a fever, which should have never been able to happen, so why did it matter how high it was?

Bella's human emotions were a little more difficult to read, but I was growing more and more familiar with my new little sister and her surprise was pretty clear. The source of it could have been the numbers of the thermometer, or just the fact that Rose was being nice to her for a change. It was another limitation of my gift: I could easily read emotions, but not the thoughts behind them.

"Bad for a human, definitely bad for a vampire. But it isn't any higher than it was." She stroked my shoulder a few times, almost experimentally. I couldn't recall if she had ever touched me before, but it did feel good now. My standoffishness and scars tended to scare other vampires away from doing so, except my family, of course. I pressed back against into her fingers, silently requesting that she continue.

One of the nice things about Bella was that she knew when to just keep quiet, and now was no exception. She seemed to sense that I didn't have the mental energy to carry on a conversation. If I could just focus on her gentle hands, it took my mind off of the pain, which still hadn't been fixed by whatever I had been given. Rose talked, but she was mostly filling me in on the remainder of the school day, nothing that required me to answer back. Not that I actually cared that Angela had worn a similar outfit to her own, though not as expensive, of course.

Suddenly the feeling of nausea overwhelmed me again, and I sat bold upright, causing both girls to jump. Luckily, Bella (who must have had far more experience with this sort of thing than Rose or I) got the bowl from on the nightstand and held it under my mouth as I started throwing up again. It was more painful than before, probably because there was less in my stomach to bring up. It was only when she grimaced and closed her eyes that I remembered how disturbing she found the sight of blood. What was coming up looked only marginally pinker then what had gone down and certainly smelled the same. She hung in there, though, never backing down.

Every muscle was shaking, and my chest jerked with involuntary breaths. I wasn't sure if I thought I was dying or just wished that I was. Anything had to be better than this. The fear from Bella and Rosalie only made things worse, combining with my own until I could no longer tell our emotions apart. Finally, I was able to get myself under control and nudge them both into complacency. Bella recovered her voice first. "Done?" She was a study in calm composure, even if her emotions told a darker tale. At my weak nod, she took the bowl into the bathroom.

Rose wiped at my face with a damp cloth, one she must have retrieved while I was puking my guts up. Inexplicably, I actually felt better than I had for hours, as though whatever had been troubling me had come up and vanished. When Bella offered the glass of water again, I drank without hesitation. Most vampires will take water, since liquids aren't as troubling to our systems as solid food. True, they didn't do anything for us nutritionally, but it was better than having a constantly dry throat.

"You look a little better. Still pretty bad, but better." Tact had never been one of Rosalie's strong points.

I was about to tell her that I was feeling a little better when my spirits suddenly soared. There was only one creature in the entire world who could cause a reaction like that. Alice was home. Rosalie startled also, her excitement rising. Bella couldn't sense Edward like that, not yet, but she was a smart girl and easily picked up on the signals Rose and I were giving off.

Footsteps came across the yard, through the door and into the front room. From there they split, with only the lighter tread still coming towards us. A sudden absence of sound told me that Edward and Emmett had gone into Carlisle's study and shut the doors. His office was the only room in this house that was soundproofed, and it had been done so well that not even a vampire could hear what was said. It was nice to have some place to go for private talks, but at the moment I was consumed by curiosity.

Alice exploded through the door and leapt onto the bed. I was ready for her this time, and managed to flip her to the side. She laughed and put a hand to my face. "You're feeling better." A rush of happiness went through me. "Not as hot."

Of course, this necessitated both Bella and Rosalie coming over to check for themselves. I hoped Alice was right, because about was about done with being stuck in this bed, feeling like crap.

Bella's fingers felt warm against my skin for the first time all day. She smiled. "I think his fever's breaking." She gave me a gentle nudge. "I think you might live after all. Well, figuratively speaking."

When she smiled at me like that, it was hard to think of her as food. Maybe there was something to Rosalie's theory after all. But that was something to consider later, when I had all of my strength and mental capacity back.

Alice rubbed my neck, hitting all the right spots. It was lulling, so much so that I felt my body start to relax. She kept stroking. "Your eyes are changing back. They look more green then grey now. Soon the yellow will totally take over." She sounded almost sad.

"Sorry to disappoint you."

"No, I'm not disappointed. You could never disappoint me. I just . . . it was kind of nice to see what you might have looked like before."

I knew she meant before my change, but I didn't really think of things that way. To me, there was only one 'before' that mattered, and that was before I found Alice. With very few exceptions (Peter and Charlotte being the biggest) there had been no life for me at all until she came into it. Since meeting her, I had a new mate, a new family, and even a new name. I was barely recognizable as the creature that had commanded armies as both a human and a vampire. I had gone soft, but somehow that didn't seem like such a bad thing. I wanted to tell her this, but when I opened my mouth, something entirely different came out. "Did you find anything in the woods?"

Her brows drew together. "How did you know that we were looking for something in the woods?"

How had I known that? Thirty seconds ago, all I had known was that she had been gone for a while. "I . . . I don't know. I just know you went to the clearing in the woods." Even as the words were coming out of my mouth, I had no idea what they meant. "It's there."

A silence followed while Alice stared deep into my eyes. Finally, she shook her head. "You're right. We went to the clearing in the woods, but we didn't find anything. Jasper, there was nothing there."