Disclaimer: I do not own Skip Beat! nor do I own the song 'I Dreamed a Dream'.
It was a sunny summer day in Kyoto, without a single cloud to blemish the seemingly endless expanse of cerulean sky. But, the clear weather completely contrasted the storminess Kyoko felt inside. It had been years since she had been to her home town, and it was somewhat comforting to see the place she grew up in. She just wished she had come on a better occasion. Swallowing hard, Kyoko managed to make out words for the first time that day.
"I just need a minute alone." she croaked to Ren, who nodded and padded off. The teen's lips curled up slightly at how understanding her boyfriend was being. They had only dating for a month, but the actor had been beyond wonderful to her.
Bending down, Kyoko lowered herself onto the grassy earth and sat on her knees, clenching her fists tightly. There, she stared at the gray stone in front of her. The stone which read 'Mogami Saena'.
She still remembered the one morning just over a week ago, when she received a letter that her mother had passed away. At first, she had nothing to say. After all, she had barely known the woman and hadn't had a trace of her existence in about eight years. But her acting had suffered that day. All her scenes were stiff and she ended up being sent home early. And of course, Ren was able to immediately pick up that she was acting out of sorts.
Once Kyoko told him what happened, he insisted she go visit the grave. She managed to move her schedule around, so she could come today without missing much work. Taking her senpai's previous advice, not even a death in the family should keep her from her work (despite her boyfriend's best efforts to convince her that she need not take his advice so literally).
Now, her eyes still fixed on the tombstone, Kyoko remained strong in her resolve that she wouldn't shed a tear today. She had spent enough of her tears on the woman when she was younger. Running her hands through her hair, she could still remember those painful days as if they were yesterday. When earning just the smallest amount of praise from the woman she called her mother was the reason of her existence. Just about everything she did, she did in an effort to make her mother smile. Which of course, Kyoko was never able to do.
She didn't feel sad, like one usually would when a family member passes. The woman buried feet away from her would not be missed. Instead, Kyoko felt confused and frustrated. She lacked closure. A very very small part of her had wished that her mother would notice her on television, and feel some kind of pride in what she had accomplished. Another part of Kyoko wanted to know why her mother had treated her the way she did. For years, Kyoko had blamed herself and her failures for the reason why her mother had acted so cold with her. But, Ren, the President, and all numerous others managed to convince her that she was in fact loved by those around her, and that it was not her fault. However, that did not change the facts. Her mother was still a distant figure in her life, and now the woman was gone forever.
Kyoko felt it was pointless to feel sorry for herself. What's done is done. She comforted herself that she had wonderful friends, a great job, and a handsome and loving boyfriend. Wasn't that all she could ask for? Plus, now she could completely move on from her past. Still, no matter how much she tried to list the positives, there was still the same little girl deep inside her who cried out to be loved by her mother.
Hoisting herself up, Kyoko walked back to Ren, who was waiting for her under a nearby tree. Concern was written all over his face, and Kyoko felt a flash of guilt for making him worry.
"Are you alright?" he asked her softly.
"Yeah." He took her hand in his, and the warmth spread throughout her body as he lead her back to their rented car.
"You know," he started, "we can stay here in Kyoto a little longer if you want to."
"It's ok," she replied firmly, "let's just go home." The soreness in her throat returned once again. Looking back one last time, Kyoko realized that not only was her mother buried there, so were a few of her childhood dreams. Dreams of one day earning her mother's love, and living happily together as a family. But those were pieces of the past. Some dreams deserve to be put to rest, after all.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Sorry that it took me a few days to get this up. I actually wrote this on Sunday, but I haven't really had time to edit it or submit it. I already have my idea for the next chappy; I just need to type it out (is it weird that I planned out most of it while I was in the shower?). I'll try to make that longer than this chapter, and have it up by the end of the weekend.
Oh, and thanks a million to those of you who reviewed :) That made me so happyyy.