By the way, I've decided to make rings akin to pennies. (So an amount like 500 rings is only $5)
Mobian Graffiti
"Okay, everybody," Sonic addressed his band. "Are you all ready to make some music?"
Everybody answered in the affirmative.
Sonic started strumming a twelve-bar blues riff on Mary Jane:
-
"You know, the music that I'm strumming is known as the twelve-bar blues;
It's oh so simple to learn, and simple to use;
Master this and we can play just about anything we choose!"
-
"Well, that's the gist of it, at least," Sonic added. "You understand what the twelve-bar sounds like now, right?"
Everybody nodded.
"And I just came up with those lyrics off the top of my head." Sonic began strumming again. "You try it, Tails. It's easy!"
-
"Well, I got two tails, and there ain't nobody else like me;
Yeah, I got two tails, and there ain't nobody else like me;
I'm an expert pilot and I love to build machines!"
-
Still strumming, Sonic said, "You got it, Tails! Knuckles! You're up!"
-
"My island is airborne, and if you saw it, you'd be shocked;
My punches are so strong, I can even shatter rocks;
When I get pissed off, I sit back and let my knuckles talk!"
-
"Good, keep this going! Take it, Shadow!"
Sonic kept strumming. "Shadow? Hello? Your turn buddy!"
"Just a minute Sonic," Shadow replied. "I need to think of some good lines."
"Don't think, just sing!" Sonic insisted. "Make a fool of yourself; the rest of us did."
"Okay, here goes." Shadow gulped.
-
"Maria and I used to live aboard the ARK;
Yeah, Maria and I used to live aboard the ARK;
But then the soldiers killed my baby and my life has been so dark!"
-
"Oh, that's right, Shadow!" Sonic stopped strumming. "You've lost more than any of us have. Use it! Let your pain out through your music."
"Thanks, Sonic. But it hasn't really made me feel any better."
"Oh, the blues aren't about helping yourself feel better; it's about making other people feel worse!" Sonic explained brightly.
"That make sense," Shadow grinned. "Knowing that makes me feel a bit better."
"Okay. Let's get rockin'. Yo, Harry, we're ready to record."
The studio technician turned on the speakers and Sonic Boom began recording their first album.
-----
Green Hill Rock
Instrumentation:
Sonic the Hedgehog: Lead vocals, acoustic guitar
Shadow the Hedgehog: Lead and rhythm guitar
Miles "Tails" Prower: Bass guitar
Knuckles the Echidna: Drums
[12-bar blues with bright electric guitar riffs, a la 50's rockabilly]
-
Smash a robot and pick up a ring
You wave it all around and you shake that thing
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do it, do it, all the time, never wanna stop.
-
If you get knocked down you can just regroup
Hit the spring and do a loop de loop
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do it, do it, all the time, never wanna stop.
-
[Bright guitar solo]
-
Well, here comes Buttnik like a troll
Nothin' to do but shake, rattle, and roll
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do it, do it, all the time, never wanna stop.
-
Do it all day, do it all night
Do it from dusk to the morning light
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do the Green Hill Rock
Do it, do it, all the time, never wanna stop
-
[Song ends]
The Grit Pit, approximately 7:00 pm
The Grit Pit was located on the outskirts of Station Square. It was a fifties-style diner that had outside drive-in service as well as indoor seating. A waitress with short wavy hair and cat-eye glasses walked over to Sonic's table.
"What do you boys want?"
"Uhh, just water for me," Tails answered.
"Water, please," Knuckles said.
Shadow ordered next. "I'll have coffee."
I'll have Chaos Cola," Sonic said.
"We have a problem with our carbonation unit. I'm afraid Chaos Cola isn't on tap right now," the waitress replied.
Sonic sighed, disappointed. "I'll have water…"
"Okay, and to eat?" she asked Tails.
"I'd like a Grit Burger with fries, please."
Knuckles and Shadow ordered the same thing. The waiter turned to face Sonic.
"And you?" she asked resignedly.
"I'll have a double Grit Burger please, with lettuce, tomato, onions, and mustard."
"Would you like fries with that?"
"Actually, I would like onion rings, please."
"Okay, we'll have your food shortly," the waitress rolled her eyes and left the table.
-----
Forty five minutes later, the four were still waiting for their drinks.
"What's taking so long?" Tails complained. "I'm starving."
The waitress came by and dropped off four glasses of water.
"Excuse me. Miss?" Shadow asked. "I ordered coffee."
"Are you sure you want coffee? You already have water, so coffee will be extra."
"But I didn't ask for wat"— the waitress walked off before Shadow could finish.
-----
Twenty minutes later, the waitress brought out four plates of fries. She set them down and then presented the bill. The Grit Burgers were on it, even though they hadn't reached the table yet.
"Miss, why are our burgers on the bill if we haven't received them yet?" Knuckles asked.
"And I ordered onion rings," Sonic added.
"I haven't gotten my coffee yet," Shadow added.
"And I've needed a refill for about ten minutes," Tails finished.
"The burgers are gonna be another twenty minutes. The bill is just there in case you want to take care of it ahead of time," the waitress said, rolling her eyes as if advance billing was common practice. "Although, based on your orders, I'll need to update it. Mr. Blue Hedgehog, I don't recall hearing you order onion rings, but if you really want them now I can add that to the bill. Mr. Black Hedgehog, in the future, please let me know what you want earlier and stop pretending that you ordered it all along. Coffee will be extra. Mr. Fox, you get one refill and it will cost 70 rings."
She left again before they could argue with her. They started to eat the fries, because it was a safe bet that they would be cold by the time the burgers arrived.
-----
Thirty minutes later, the waitress brought out four burgers and plopped them down at Sonic's table, along with the updated bill. She hadn't removed any of the items that they had not asked for. Their total was 4499 rings.
Sonic checked his burger. There was only one patty. It had a single wilted leaf of lettuce on it, no cheese, tomatoes, or onions, and instead of mustard, the whole thing was drenched in ketchup.
"Miss, this isn't what I ordered at all."
"According to your bill it is."
Sonic looked down at the bill. His burger was listed as a single with ketchup.
"The bill is wrong," Sonic asserted. "And we're not paying for the stuff we didn't order; you haven't removed any of the items we didn't want."
"If you didn't want them, why did you order them in the first place?"
"We didn't order them in the first place!" Sonic struggled to explain.
"Well, just come up with the money or you'll all be washing dishes tonight."
Again, she walked off before any of them could stop her.
"This sucks!" Sonic said. He got up from the table and walked over to the jukebox. He deposited some rings and selected a song. The machine didn't respond. Sonic pushed the ring return button. Nothing happened. Sonic started shaking the machine to get his rings back.
"Hey!" the waitress called. "Don't do that to the machine! You tryin' to scrape by off of other people's jukebox money?"
"It ate my rings! It won't play and it won't refund me!"
"There is nothing wrong with that jukebox. It works perfectly. Now either pay up or get in the kitchen and start washing dishes. If you don't decide in five minutes, I'll call throw you out and tell the police you tried to dine and dash."
Sonic walked over to Tails, Shadow, and Knuckles.
"I have the money with me, but we're not paying." Sonic whispered. "Tails, go get the manager. After I use the bathroom, we'll hear the manager's apology and then we're out of here. We've had s*** service tonight and there's no excuse for it."
-----
The bathroom was occupied. Sonic knocked and got a rude response from the other side. He heard whistling. The guy was just taking his time. The guy knew somebody was waiting, but he was content to just let Sonic sweat outside and inch ever closer to digestive meltdown. The toilet flushed and he heard heavy, leisurely footsteps over to the sink. Sonic ran in as soon as the bathroom was free. No sooner was Sonic ready to relieve himself when the handle turned and rattled against the lock. The asshole behind him hadn't even bothered to knock.
"Occupied!" Sonic called.
The knocking persisted, louder. "How long do you plan to stay in there?? I have to whiz!"
"Dude! Thirty seconds!" Sonic called back, annoyed. "I have to whiz, too!"
A new voice sounded. It was the waitress.
"Are you still here?! You've got some nerve, hogging the bathrooms! You have to go, huh? Well our other customers have to go, too! Honestly, some customers, and the way they insist that it's all about them…" her voice receded.
-----
When Sonic left the bathroom, he found the manager standing in front of his table.
"Ah, you must be Sonic the Hedgehog. Please, sit down, sir."
Sonic sat down and the manager began.
"Now, your friend here told me all about what happened, and I want to offer you my sincerest apologies on behalf of the Grit Pit. As a gesture of apology, I have waived your bill and given you each a vanilla milkshake."
"Thank you, sir. Maybe this place isn't all bad."
After finishing their milkshakes, they turned to leave when the manager called after them.
"Hey! Where are you all going?"
"We're leaving. Why?"
"You haven't paid for the milkshakes. Now, our ingredients are very scarce right now, so with the current state of the market, your total is 5000 rings."
The Grit Pit Blues
Instrumentation:
Sonic the Hedgehog: Lead vocals, acoustic guitar
Shadow the Hedgehog: Lead guitar, rhythm guitar, backing vocals
Miles "Tails" Prower: Bass guitar, backing vocals
Knuckles the Echidna: Drums, backing vocals
[Bluesy, but straight rhythm, not swing, a la Jerry Lee Lewis]
-
Sittin' at the diner waitin' for my meal
I think I got the raw end of the deal
Been waitin' more than forty minutes for my food
I'm just singin' the Grit Pit Blues!
-
Shadow ordered coffee, he got water instead
The errors on our bill gave me pain in my head
Our waitress was in a really monstrous mood
I'm just singin' the Grit Pit Blues!
-
[Chorus]
We don't know what we did to touch those people off
They acted like they were being abused
It was all that we could do to keep our voices soft
And fight the temptation to sue
It's the Grit Pit Blues
-
It was fifty minutes later when my burger came
It wasn't what I ordered, nowhere near the same
The waitress said I ordered it but that's not true
I'm just singin' the Grit Pit Blues!
-
The manager came over to apologize
He gave us all milkshakes, cold as ice
But he billed us for the shakes and I disapprove
I'm just singin' the Grit Pit Blues!
-
[Guitar solo]
-
[Chorus]
-
[Song ends]
Back in the apartment, Sonic was fuming; he had had 5000 rings ripped off of him.
"Sonic," Tails said. "I'm hungry. Can we find a burger place?"
Sonic, Knuckles, and Shadow facepalmed.
Bye, for now! Tomorrow, I'll be on my way to Bay St. Louis, Mississippi to help repair hurricane damage.