Um, yeah, I have no excuses. Sorry. Here, have another chapter.

The song is "Camera Shy" by School Boy Humor and is pretty much responsible for everything that this story is, was, and will become. (Hahah I have no part in this, at all)

"Oi, where is the tomato bastard?" Romano demanded without prelude, plopping onto the lunch bench as far from Gilbert and Francis as he could possibly be. It wasn't far. It was a small bench. He glared suspiciously at Francis, noting the extreme lack of … lecherousness on his face. In fact, Francis was moodily poking at the sorry excuse for a salad on his Styrofoam tray, looking for all the world as dejected as if prostitution had been outlawed. Which – lo and behold, it had been, at least in this country.

"Dunno," said Gilbert with a shrug and a strange grin on his face. Well, stranger than usual. "He just ran off during fourth period – said he had something to do."

At his words, Francis' plastic fork cracked through his lunch tray, spilling salad in his lap. The blonde jumped up hastily, swearing. "Merde! I just bought these pants and I was told they make my ass –"

"Don't finish that sentence, pervert," muttered Romano moodily, poking at his own lunch of pizza and animal crackers. Stupid Antonio – Romano was gracious enough to sit with him and his stupid friends every day at lunch and the bastard wasn't even there!

"Hey, whatcha so down about?" asked Gilbert, sliding in down the bench to poke at Romano's cheek.

"Agh! Back off, pedo!" Romano yelped, shoving Gilbert backwards so he sprawled awkwardly on the linoleum of the cafeteria.

Gilbert kept smiling. "If I'm a pedophile, Antonio is too."

"He is not!" Romano practically screeched, leaping to his feet. "B-because that would imply that we – that he – was capable of being in a relationship! And he's definitely not! He's too dumb a-and… and yeah!" he finished, punctuating his outburst with a kick in the direction of Gilbert's head. The albino just laughed and swung himself back upright, avoiding the kick.

"Aww… Lovi that's so not cute…" mumbled a voice behind him.

Romano spun with a sound that was much like a squeak (but he was too manly to squeak, of course) and a blush on his face. Antonio had heard…?

"What're you doing, eavesdropping?" he demanded, color climbing with the pitch of his voice. He yelled when he was embarrassed – it was the best way to cover it.

Antonio looked confused, and had a strange look on his face, but it was quickly brushed aside with one of his brilliant smiles. "Aww, you're so cute! All red and flustered – were you waiting for me?"

"Yes. Where were you?" Romano snapped, then stopped, eyes widening when he realized he had just admitted to waiting for the bastard. However, Antonio did not seem to notice. Which was annoying. Damn, was that boy just thick? He probably had to be, to put up with all the shit Romano gave him. He knew he gave Antonio shit. But that was okay, because Antonio knew he didn't mean it.

Romano completely missed the venomous glance that Francis was directing toward them as Antonio pulled Romano into a quick hug before sitting down at the lunch table and pulling a bag of chips and vitamin water out of his messenger bag. Romano made a little sound of displeasure and moved to pout in the seat across from the Spanish boy.

"I was taking care of something for drama club," Antonio explained, eagerly digging into his bag of chips. "Are you going to be there today?"

"Kind of have to be," Romano muttered. "I need a ride home. Feli is being tutored by his tight-assed Asian friend."

Antonio grinned. "Good. I have something to show you, so stay awake this time, okay?"

"Tch, whatever. Maybe."

"Mon chou, what is it that you are plotting?" Francis had managed to wipe up most of his salad mess, and slipped over to put an arm around his friend, leaning a head on the brunette's shoulder and whispering in his ear. "Do you not know that I am starting try-outs for the school play today?"

"Don't worry, I won't be a nuisance, I promise!" Antonio said fervently. "Please, I have a really really good idea!" He turned his huge green eyes on Francis, and the blonde stared back, sighing. No, there was no way to resist. Something about the Spaniard had even him trumped for sexiness. It was depressing.

"Oi, what're you whispering about?" demanded Romano, having given up finding a way to wipe the grease off his pizza and instead picking up his animal crackers. He viciously bit the head off an elephant, not at all liking the way that Francis was hanging off Antonio. Not as if it were a rare occurrence…

"Nothing, querido!" Antonio promised brightly.

"Sex." Gilbert answered at the same time, stroking an egg in a milk carton. Romano raised an eyebrow at the action, but did not question it, despite the fact Gilbert was currently whispering something to the egg in German. That idiot was going to find out the hard way that those things weren't fertilized. He still remembered the time that Antonio had run to him, sobbing, after Biology class, when his teacher had dropped "Little Andorra" and "she" smashed to bits on the floor. He had been fiercely relieved, in some sick sort of way, that anything resembling a connection between Antonio and That Blonde Perverted Bastard had been erased.

Not that he was considering infanticide or anything. It was only a fucking egg.

The lunch bell grated heavily in his ears, and he sighed, shoving his half-finished lunch into the trashcan. Yay. More classes that he didn't care about.

"I'll see you after school, then, Lovi!" Antonio promised, hugging Romano again, who stood as stiff as a board and tried not to look pleased.

"Whatever."

Only two and a half more hours….

Romano, as asked, showed up to Drama club. However, he was only coming under protest, and half an hour late. Because he could. Never mind that all he had done in that half an hour was sit in front of the auditorium and stress about what the blue fuck Antonio had up his sleeve.

He attempted to slink into his seat in the back of the room, but Antonio was waiting for him as he entered.

"Lovi!" He called from his seat on the edge of the stage, where he was talking with Francis and Elizaveta, the costume designer. A few other students were in groups on the fringes of the room, going over monologues or at least pretending as if they were. "Lovi, Lovi, come here!" He vaulted down from the stage, landing with a stumble and almost falling flat on his face. Romano resisted the urge to move to help him catch his balance, despite the fact he was too far away to be much good. Instead, he glared at Antonio and walked stiffly over to him and his friends. He eyed Francis and Elizaveta suspiciously. The brunette girl had a glint of absolutely unholy glee in her eyes. By contrast, Francis looked as dejected as he had at lunch. Something was up.

"Lovi, Lovi, guess what?" Antonio asked with a wide smile on his face. "Francis says that I can be Romeo in the school play! Isn't that wonderful?" He was so needy for congratulations that it actually made Romano's brain hurt a little.

"Sure. Great," he muttered grudgingly, not willing to completely derail the Spaniard. "Is that all you wanted me to come here for?"

Antonio's eyes lit up as if he had just remembered something particularly wonderful and sugar-coated. "Nope! I have a surprise for you! So sit down, okay?" Not waiting for a reply, he pushed Romano's shoulders until he was forced to sit back in one of the fronnt row seats. Romano shifted uncomfortably, already feeling like he had the attention of most of the people in the room. But that was just silly; no one was paying attention to –

"Everyone!" Antonio announced, clapping his hands and swinging himself back onto the stage. "Can I have everyone's attention, por favor? Just a few moments! Can you all take a seat?"

Most of the drama kids did as they were told, having been conditioned to pay attention to whoever was on stage. Elizaveta let out a little squeal of delight and plopped onto the nearest seat. Francis shot a nervous look at Romano and sat next to her.

"Ludwig, Vash? Like we practiced at lunch?" prompted Antonio, peering out from against the low illumination on the stage. Immediately, the two tech boys sprang into action, dimming the house lights completely and setting a spot on Antonio. He stood directly in the center of the stage, smiling faintly. Then, he tapped his foot once, twice, and nodded his head.

Immediately, a string instrumental version of what sounded like it could have been a pop song blasted from the speakers. And what's more – Antonio was singing.

There is no hope for you and me

Cuz this long drive might be

The last time I take the wheel

You're not sure how you feel …

Romano felt his jaw drop and he didn't bother to pick it back up again. Th-that bastard. Was staring right at him. Right. At. Him. And everyone in the auditorium knew it, because they were staring at him, too.

I hear the spotlight always gives you stage fright…

Romano's heart was beating about a billion times a second and he was actually having a little trouble breathing. He was caught between abject embarrassment at his situation and… well, actually, a fair bit of excitement. Was Antonio singing to him…? His voice was so low and mature; he sounded like the mariachi singers at the Mexican restaurant down the street, only much more… sexy…

You play the love, and baby I'll play the lead

Just strike a pose and fake a smile, you're coming with me

I'll strum my guitar 'cuz boy I know how you are

You're just a little bit camera shy, but you're still a star

Romano was about to let himself be flattered. He was going to give in. He was happy, goddamnit, that Antonio cared enough to do… this…

But then the bastard began to move. Walk, actually; as the spot followed him, he slowly began to descend the stage. And he was moving towards Romano.

Oh hell no. There was no flipping way that bastard was –

And now, all eyes really were on Romano as Antonio moved closer to him, an absolutely smouldering look on his face.

Can I pick you up? Will you be my star?

The spotlight's up

Move close for the final scene…

And Antonio did just that, moved in front of Romano until he was kneeling at his feet. The irate Italian did little more than stare and blink as Antonio moved in close, resting his hands on Romano's knees. They were shaking.

The music died away.

"Romano Vargas, I've had a crush on you for a very long time, and I want to know, once and for all – will you be the Juliet to my Romeo? Will you… please… go out with me?"

The look on Antonio's face was so open and embarrassed and earnest and desperate and he was so close to him and the blood rushed completely to Romano's face and this had to be the worst, most embarrassing moment of his LIFE and he opened his mouth and –

"HELL NO, BASTARD!"

And flew from the auditorium.

Yes, that was the best way to handle the situation.