And I'm back after a very long hiatus. How many people are happy to see me? Oh and, maireadnesbitt? You better join Gmail, or you'll be sorry…. Anyway, this is now, of course, AU. Deal. I never planned it that way, but I'll try.

I do not own Harry Potter, and never will, unless J.K. Rowling just randomly appears from the air and bestows the copyright on me. (Fantasizes)

Harry

"I can't believe it!" Ron fumed. "We're of age! And they still hide stuff from us like we're babies!"

Hermione was calmly reading, and Harry was just staring out of the window. Rain sloshed down the windows, and thunder boomed menacingly in the distance. The world was mourning the loss of Dumbledore. And rightly so. How could he, Harry Potter, find all seven Horcruxes, battle Voldemort, and vanquish him, when he was nothing but a seventeen year old boy? He might as well just give up already. Harry was a menace to society. Voldemort would rip the world apart to find him. So many people had died because they were in Voldemort's way. Sirius, Cedric, Dumbledore, his mum, his dad, Aurors, innocents, and muggles. Harry let out a defeated sigh, and unknowingly broke up the bickering that had been going on. He knew he would have to go and tell the Order his decision of leaving. He knew they would not be pleased.

"Harry? Where are you going?" Hermione asked worriedly.

"Down." He gestured vaguely to the stairs, and stumped away.

Harry noted the locked door, and acknowledged the fact that they had cast a Silencing Spell that made it impossible to hear anything. Well they could hear him. He raised a fist and banged on the door loudly.

Remus

He could barely breathe. Kristin was alive. Truly alive, and impatient, as he could see. Well, he'd be impatient too if two dozen wands were leveled at him. Remus flew out of his chair and hugged Kristin tightly.

"You're alive, you're alive, you're alive…" Remus babbled. "You're not an imposter, you're not a Death Eater, you're Kristin."

Kristin patted him on the back and squeaked out.

"I won't be alive much longer if I can't breathe."

"Right, sorry."

Kristin straightened her robes and said calmly, "About that Death Eater statement…how do you know I'm not?"

Everyone in the kitchen froze, except Remus.

He chuckled and said fondly, "You always had to tweak everyone's robes."

Kristin grinned cheerfully, but shoved up both arms of her robes. Moody inspected her the longest.

"Get Slughorn to make some Veritserum. I want to make sure she's not a spy." He finally grunted out and turned away.

"Slughorn's still teaching?" Kristin's voice was amazed. "The one that favors the children with connections? Bless me, I thought he retired in our seventh year, claiming he got worn out by certain young men styling themselves as the Marauders."

Remus had the grace to blush. "I tried to stop Sirius—"

Kristin let out a snort. "Tried to stop him, of course you did. I saw someone with your height, your way of walking, your way of talking, encouraging him."

"Must have been James." He replied with a straight face.

"James was with Lily at that moment. They were making eyes over dinner. It made me lose my appetite. And you can't claim it was Peter either. He was sitting next to me sniggering. Anymore excuses?"

"You need to check your eyes."

"Why you little—"

BANG, BANG, BANG. Kristin jerked and was on her feet in a flash with her wand out.

"Fast reflexes." Remus commented.

"Yeah…" Kristin muttered.

She put up her wand, where, Remus couldn't see, and sat down.

"Are you going to get that?"

Molly Weasley was already at the door arguing softly.

"No, Harry, you can't come in, we're having a meeting—"

"Mrs. Weasley, I know you mean well, but don't make me say what I have to say out here."

Molly gasped and sputtered, but stood aside to let Harry in.

"James?" Kristin muttered. "No, got Lily's eyes and is too young."

Remus silently counted down the seconds while Kristin put two and two together. 3…2…1… An excited gasp came from her direction.

"Harry Potter?! My, you've grown! Last I saw you; you were a little tyke that had a strange fascination with Remus. Tall, handsome, probably good at Quidditch, favorite class—Transfiguration? No? DADA? Seventh year, right? Any siblings?"

Whoops. Remus hadn't had the time to tell Kristin all the events that took place in her absence.

"Are you sure? The way Lily and James stared at each other, you'd think that there'd be at least seven little Potters running around. Is your best friend Neville? No? Funny, I remember Alice saying you two would grow up together. Has Sirius settled down yet? What about Peter? Bethany Claire was interested in him wasn't she? How's Severus doing? What are your teachers like? Your friends? Is classwork hard? Do you—"

"Kristin. I have some things to tell you."

"Well hurry up and spit them out then."

"It might be best if we talk somewhere private."

"What's the matter with here?"

"You might find it preferable—"

"No thanks, I want to stay with my godson, if you don't mind."

"Kristin—"

"How'd you do on your OWLS? Did your father give you his invisibility cloak? Marauder's Map? Wait, that got taken by Filch…"

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

"Kristin! Voldemort went to Godric's Hallow on Halloween!"

Kristin's steady stream of questions died abruptly.

"What did you say?"

"Lily and James are…"

Kristin let out a burst of hysterical laughter.

"Are you telling me that my best friend and her husband are dead? If you are, then I don't believe you. The gods have seen fit to take three friends from me already, surely…"

Kristin glanced around the kitchen.

"No. Not Lily, anyone but Lily."

"Kristin…"

Remus laid a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Don't touch me." Kristin spun on her heel. "I'm leaving this mad house."

She gave a half sob and fled through the door. Remus sat down wearily and rubbed his temples.

"That did not go well…"

Kristin

Remus is lying, Remus is lying. Her mind chanted. No time to think why Remus would lie, Remus is lying. Where am I going? Alice. Alice will know. Kristin took a deep breath and apparated to Alice's mother's house. After all, Kristin didn't know where Alice was living. Augusta would.

Kristin took a deep breath and knocked on the door. A long time passed, then the door timidly opened.

"Yes? Who's there?" A wary voice called out.

"It's me, Augusta! Kristin Yami."

"Kristin Yami is dead."

The door swung shut.

"Please!"

Kristin reached out and caught the door.

"It's really me! I just want to know where Alice is."

"How can you not know? The whole world knows after what happened to her."

The last part was said in a mixture of bitterness and sadness. Kristin's breath caught.

"She's not…dead?"

"Better off dead, then what really happened."

"Then what happened, damn it!"

"How could you not know, if you claim to be one of her best friends? How could you not know, if the whole world knows?"

Kristin was silent for a moment, before taking a deep breath and saying, "I've been a horrible friend, Augusta. Please, tell me. I just want to see a familiar face."

Especially one that will tell me what really happened instead of some lies.

"St. Mungo's. Long term ward." The door slammed shut.

"What?!"

Remus

"Who was that?" Harry demanded. "I have the right to know, after she called me her godson!"

"Kristin Rachel Yami, best friend of your mother, claimed to be in hiding for seventeen years, evidently missed out on a lot of major events…and your godmother." Remus answered.

"Why was she in hiding?"

"I planned to ask her, before she ran off!"

Frustration showed clearly in his voice. Harry groaned.

"First I find out I have a godfather, then he gets killed, then I find out I have a godmother, and she runs off! What is wrong with me?"

"Kristin was always notoriously hardheaded about things she didn't want to know." McGonagall said dryly.

"Where would she go?" Tonks asked. "I mean, there's not many places open to people thought dead for seventeen years, and it's dangerous for a person who doesn't know the situation at hand."

St. Mungo's

Kristin stood at the information desk, tapping her foot impatiently.

"Where are Frank and Alice Longbottom?" She asked the information witch.

"On the fifth floor." The receptionist replied, not looking up from the Witch Weekly magazine she was avidly perusing. Kristin nodded her thanks, then turned and headed for the elevator.

The horrible room was occupied by five people, two of them her friends. Kristin could see Frank's dead and apathetic face, and Alice's frazzled features. She let out a choked sob and turned to leave the room. She got halfway there, before falling to the ground.

"Why?!" Kristin half screamed half whispered. "Why have all my friends been cursed? Is it my fault? What did I do to offend the gods to bring such bad luck on people I care for?"

Kristin didn't notice that Alice had turned to look at her at her words and that she kept staring at her, a vaguely puzzled and frustrated look. The sort of look you would give to someone that you know you've seen before, but cannot recall where. The sort where you feel that someone is important, but cannot recall why. Kristin kept sobbing, her face in her hands. I guess Remus was right about Lily and James. I have to go find out what happened. I must be well informed. There is danger written everywhere. A soft touch on her shoulder jerked her upright and ready for a fight. Alice stared at her with large startled eyes. Timidly, she gently handed a Drooble's Best Blowing Gum wrapper to Kristin. Her mouth moved open soundlessly spelling out a word. A name. Kristin.

Remus

"Remus, you know her best." Hestia said. "Where do you think she went most likely?"

Remus pondered this for a while.

"Maybe…" He said quietly. "But I don't know if I'm right…"

"Spit it out Lupin!" Moody roared. "Any hunch is better than letting a potentially dangerous loose end wander around stupidly!"

"Augusta Longbottom."

Augusta Longbottom's house, again

"What do you want with me, Lupin?" Augusta snarled. "I won't have you putting my family in danger!"

That was enough to break Remus's hold on his temper.

"What about your son Frank? He endangered his family well enough. I thought you felt proud of his "achievements", proud to oppose Voldemort."

"Don't-say-his-name." Augusta hissed. "And Frank did what he had to do. But there's no reason to endanger yourself when there is no gain."

Remus sighed.

"All we want to know is if Kristin was here and then we leave."

"Kristin was here." Augusta snapped. "Or an imposter of her anyway. How can she not know what happened to Alice? I sent her to St. Mungo's. Now go away."

"Thank you, Augusta. I…I'm sorry for what I said about Frank. He was a good man and friend."

Augusta's face softened.

"You're a good man too, Lupin. I apologize as well. I'm just worried about…well…everything."

"We're doing the best we can, Augusta. The best we can."

Remus nodded once to Augusta, then turned and apparated to St. Mungo's.

Kristin

"Alice!"

Kristin threw her arms around her and began to cry in earnest.

"Oh, Alice. I hide for seventeen years as such a coward, and look what happened to everyone! You, especially. I could have done something, I could at least of looked for news, but no! Kristin Yami can do no wrong! She hides while her friends fall one by one! Standing in the way of Voldemort, joining the bloody Order of Phoenix, doing what had to be done, and sacrificing themselves for the good! And Kristin just vanishes when everyone needed her the most, doesn't even bother to help the Order, doing nothing, and just sobbing and wailing like a helpless, useless, cowardly, honorless scum!"

Remus

He was accompanied by Moody, Tonks, and Harry. All were very insistent on coming with him to find Kristin. Remus could understand Harry's enthusiasm, and at a stretch, Alastor's, but Tonks? Why would she care if Kristin was found other than the detached worry of the Order being discovered? They took the elevator up to the fifth floor, and found Kristin embracing Alice, sobbing loudly.

"Kristin."

Remus laid a tentative hand on Kristin's shoulder, worried that she might throw it off again. Wailing deafeningly, Kristin threw her arms around Remus' neck and buried her face in his robes. Remus could only pat her awkwardly on the back. Sirius was the most experienced one when it came to crying girls; after all he had plenty of practice when he dumped his latest girlfriend. Even with his sharp hearing, Remus could only catch muffled bits of Kristin's bawled words.

"…Lily…James…killed…Voldemort…kill…Bellatrix…hate……Alice…death…why…?!"

Remus looked helplessly at Moody, Harry, and Tonks, Moody and Harry shrugged uneasily, but Tonks rolled her eyes and made a soft exclamation on the stupidity, hardheartedness, and idiocy of men. Shoving Moody and Harry out of the way, she kneeled next to Kristin and started speaking.

"It must be hard coming out of hiding after seventeen years to find that nearly everyone you know is dead…and you must feel so guilty…"

Remus mouthed to Tonks, Why would she feel guilty? Tonks scowled and mouthed back a few choice profanities.

"You must think that it's all your fault but you're being selfish….It was their decision to fight, you have to understand that and let go of the past….you have to fight today, look after Harry, make up for it that way …and look into the future."

It's an update! If you want more, you must convince maireadnesbitt to join Gmail. PM her. What do you think?

nsisdazl