-'Enter Sandman.'-
Pairings: a little angst for right now, something more substantial later.
A/N: Special thanks to Ed Scott for editing and betaing.
A/N2: God knows you can't write more unless you get reviews.
Disclaimers: I don't own anything relating to Buffy, Angel.
Timeframe: S2 AU "Innocence," you know the episode after Buffy sleeps with Angel.
Dedicated to the ones you can't save, and to the ones you can.
///////////////////////////////
"Wont this change everything?"
"That's the point."
Xander shifted in his seat. "I know, what I mean is, wouldn't you change the good also. I mean isn't there a balance type thing going on?"
The man nodded. "Yes, and it is through that balance that you can save people."
Xander sat up strait. He couldn't save Jesse, and he was damned if he wasn't going to save as many people as he could. "How?"
"You have to let go."
Xander sat back in his seat and raised an eyebrow. "Let go of what?"
The man sat up strait. "Xander, you have to understand that you cant. No matter what you do people will die, a lot of people. I know. Not just innocent people on the street, people you don't know. The worst deaths are reserved for those on the front lines."
Xander's face darkened. "I know what I was getting myself into."
The man shook his head. "No you didn't. But that doesn't matter. You have to follow through. There is always a way. There are always options. You fight until you can't fight anymore. The temptation is there, to walk away. And there will become a point where that seems like a very good possibility."
Xander stated very coldly, "So how will me doing anything change it?"
The man looked down at the table. Xander had trouble looking at his face. It was just so...normal, so nondescript. The man raised his head back to face him. "Like I said, its about Chaos. Unknowns change the equation. You were already an unknown, you changed the codex, you brought Buffy back. That changed the plans that both sides had in store."
Xander knew that he had, in fact, negated the Codex. Giles spent over an hour yelling at him and thanking him while trying to explain the ramifications of what he had done. "So, where exactly do I fit in, what do I do?"
"I can't tell you."
Xander gave him a questioning look. "Then why are you here if you can't tell me?"
"You have to realize that, simply by doing this, I have changed what I know has happened. While you wont remember any of this dream, except for bits and pieces, it's the same idea as the Codex. By changing one small specific thing, by changing you, all the other specifics could change. I just want to point you in the right direction, make sure that you remember feelings, hunches. Subtlety is key."
Xander sat back in his seat. "Okay, sensei master guy, I'm in, guide me."
//////////////////////////////////
Xander rode in the backseat with his little boxes. He had wanted to take a Stinger or a missile launcher, but that A: might have been overkill and B: wouldn't fit in the car. Instead he opted for a M72 LAW and some HE and incendiary grenades. In the trunk he had a colt M4A1 and two MP5's with several clips apiece as well as a Desert Eagle and two Five-Sevens with numerous clips. He looked at his chauffer. "You good up there, Cor?"
Cordelia looked in the rearview seeing a smiling Xander Harris playing with assorted explosives in her expensive car. "ALEXANDER LAVELLE HARRIS, YOU WILL STOP PLAYING WITH THOSE THINGS IN MY CAR THIS MINUTE."
Xander carefully put the box back on the floor, put his seatbelt back on, and put his hands on his lap. "Better?"
Cordelia smiled. "Much." She looked back to the road before asking another question. "Where are we dropping all of this off at?"
Xander grinned back at her. "My house. I'll fix everything up there. Let everyone know what I'm planning, but I don't want to scare anyone with my big ole guns before they're ready, so could you pick me up an hour after you drop me off?"
Cordelia had a small grin on her face as she continued driving. "Sure, just don't make a habit out of it."
Xander found himself looking through the rearview mirror at Cordelia. He wasn't sure what it was that they had going on. He wasn't even sure if he wanted anything going on. He smiled to himself. Every now and then when she would glance through the mirror for quick glances at him. Well, to be honest he wasn't sure if she was looking at him, or checking rear traffic, but still, a guy can hope.
"Xander?"
He smiled. "Yeah?"
"Don't stare at me like that, you're weirding me out."
He saw in the reflection the briefest little smile on her face. "You got it Cor." He grinned to himself, and then went back to organizing his 'fun' boxes.
////////////////////////////////
Xander looked at the pile he had accumulated in the past three hours laying on his bed. The assault rifle and sub machine guns had been stripped, cleaned, fitted, and polished. He did the assault rifle and the first MP5 very carefully, not really trusting the memories and instincts to do the job right. After that he did the last one blindfolded, and timed himself. Fifty-nine seconds wasn't bad, but he could do better. He counted the ammunition. One armor-piercing clip for the m4, and four regular clips. The MP5's had about 12 clips of 30 rounds. The Desert Eagle had five clips, with seven bullets per clip. The Five-Sevens had six magazines with 20 rounds per clip. Xander stood for a minute looking at the arsenal, trying to add it all up, before giving up and outfitting himself for the night.
He decided to tuck the Desert Eagle into the back of his blue jeans and slung an MP5 with a strap over his shoulder. The LAW was pre-assembled and more or less looked like a green tube with a handle and a strap. He slung it over his other shoulder. With an incendiary grenade and a HE grenade, the whole arsenal weighed about twelve pounds or so on him.
He walked to the door and stepped outside. It was about eight or so in the evening. He had on a light green shirt with blue jeans and enough firepower to take down the local authorities. For some reason nobody really paid attention to the seventeen year old with the rocket launcher and submachine gun as he patiently waited five minutes for his ride.
////////////////////////////////
Xander watched as everyone's jaw dropped when he and Cordelia walked into the library. "Happy Birthday Buffy! Guess what?" He brought around his LAW and held it in two hands, "I brought presents!"
After several seconds of silence, Xander looked at the LAW quizzically. "What, you don't like the color?"
Pairings: a little angst for right now, something more substantial later.
A/N: Special thanks to Ed Scott for editing and betaing.
A/N2: God knows you can't write more unless you get reviews.
Disclaimers: I don't own anything relating to Buffy, Angel.
Timeframe: S2 AU "Innocence," you know the episode after Buffy sleeps with Angel.
Dedicated to the ones you can't save, and to the ones you can.
///////////////////////////////
"Wont this change everything?"
"That's the point."
Xander shifted in his seat. "I know, what I mean is, wouldn't you change the good also. I mean isn't there a balance type thing going on?"
The man nodded. "Yes, and it is through that balance that you can save people."
Xander sat up strait. He couldn't save Jesse, and he was damned if he wasn't going to save as many people as he could. "How?"
"You have to let go."
Xander sat back in his seat and raised an eyebrow. "Let go of what?"
The man sat up strait. "Xander, you have to understand that you cant. No matter what you do people will die, a lot of people. I know. Not just innocent people on the street, people you don't know. The worst deaths are reserved for those on the front lines."
Xander's face darkened. "I know what I was getting myself into."
The man shook his head. "No you didn't. But that doesn't matter. You have to follow through. There is always a way. There are always options. You fight until you can't fight anymore. The temptation is there, to walk away. And there will become a point where that seems like a very good possibility."
Xander stated very coldly, "So how will me doing anything change it?"
The man looked down at the table. Xander had trouble looking at his face. It was just so...normal, so nondescript. The man raised his head back to face him. "Like I said, its about Chaos. Unknowns change the equation. You were already an unknown, you changed the codex, you brought Buffy back. That changed the plans that both sides had in store."
Xander knew that he had, in fact, negated the Codex. Giles spent over an hour yelling at him and thanking him while trying to explain the ramifications of what he had done. "So, where exactly do I fit in, what do I do?"
"I can't tell you."
Xander gave him a questioning look. "Then why are you here if you can't tell me?"
"You have to realize that, simply by doing this, I have changed what I know has happened. While you wont remember any of this dream, except for bits and pieces, it's the same idea as the Codex. By changing one small specific thing, by changing you, all the other specifics could change. I just want to point you in the right direction, make sure that you remember feelings, hunches. Subtlety is key."
Xander sat back in his seat. "Okay, sensei master guy, I'm in, guide me."
//////////////////////////////////
Xander rode in the backseat with his little boxes. He had wanted to take a Stinger or a missile launcher, but that A: might have been overkill and B: wouldn't fit in the car. Instead he opted for a M72 LAW and some HE and incendiary grenades. In the trunk he had a colt M4A1 and two MP5's with several clips apiece as well as a Desert Eagle and two Five-Sevens with numerous clips. He looked at his chauffer. "You good up there, Cor?"
Cordelia looked in the rearview seeing a smiling Xander Harris playing with assorted explosives in her expensive car. "ALEXANDER LAVELLE HARRIS, YOU WILL STOP PLAYING WITH THOSE THINGS IN MY CAR THIS MINUTE."
Xander carefully put the box back on the floor, put his seatbelt back on, and put his hands on his lap. "Better?"
Cordelia smiled. "Much." She looked back to the road before asking another question. "Where are we dropping all of this off at?"
Xander grinned back at her. "My house. I'll fix everything up there. Let everyone know what I'm planning, but I don't want to scare anyone with my big ole guns before they're ready, so could you pick me up an hour after you drop me off?"
Cordelia had a small grin on her face as she continued driving. "Sure, just don't make a habit out of it."
Xander found himself looking through the rearview mirror at Cordelia. He wasn't sure what it was that they had going on. He wasn't even sure if he wanted anything going on. He smiled to himself. Every now and then when she would glance through the mirror for quick glances at him. Well, to be honest he wasn't sure if she was looking at him, or checking rear traffic, but still, a guy can hope.
"Xander?"
He smiled. "Yeah?"
"Don't stare at me like that, you're weirding me out."
He saw in the reflection the briefest little smile on her face. "You got it Cor." He grinned to himself, and then went back to organizing his 'fun' boxes.
////////////////////////////////
Xander looked at the pile he had accumulated in the past three hours laying on his bed. The assault rifle and sub machine guns had been stripped, cleaned, fitted, and polished. He did the assault rifle and the first MP5 very carefully, not really trusting the memories and instincts to do the job right. After that he did the last one blindfolded, and timed himself. Fifty-nine seconds wasn't bad, but he could do better. He counted the ammunition. One armor-piercing clip for the m4, and four regular clips. The MP5's had about 12 clips of 30 rounds. The Desert Eagle had five clips, with seven bullets per clip. The Five-Sevens had six magazines with 20 rounds per clip. Xander stood for a minute looking at the arsenal, trying to add it all up, before giving up and outfitting himself for the night.
He decided to tuck the Desert Eagle into the back of his blue jeans and slung an MP5 with a strap over his shoulder. The LAW was pre-assembled and more or less looked like a green tube with a handle and a strap. He slung it over his other shoulder. With an incendiary grenade and a HE grenade, the whole arsenal weighed about twelve pounds or so on him.
He walked to the door and stepped outside. It was about eight or so in the evening. He had on a light green shirt with blue jeans and enough firepower to take down the local authorities. For some reason nobody really paid attention to the seventeen year old with the rocket launcher and submachine gun as he patiently waited five minutes for his ride.
////////////////////////////////
Xander watched as everyone's jaw dropped when he and Cordelia walked into the library. "Happy Birthday Buffy! Guess what?" He brought around his LAW and held it in two hands, "I brought presents!"
After several seconds of silence, Xander looked at the LAW quizzically. "What, you don't like the color?"