Chapter 4
Lucario sprinted off into the woods, looking for a place to hide. He came across a clearing, and was startled by what he saw. Two of the three Links were squaring off against Meta-Knight and Paint-roller. Oracle of Seasons link was lying in the middle, not moving. "What happened?" Lucario wondered aloud. You have no time to ponder such questions, for Wind Waker Link has just grabbed a smash ball. "Where did that smash ball come from? There has been no mention of random item drops before," Fierce Deity Link inquired. Suddenly, a giant stylus appeared and started drawing lines on the screen… "Whaddaya mean screen? There is no screen! We are seeing this from a first-person perspective!" FD Link shouted angrily.
"Right. I've had just about enough of your interruptions," I said, and materialized within the pages of this story. I drew a pencil (no pun intended) as long as my arm and decapitated the irritating incarnation of the hero of time. Suddenly, a great banner appeared above our heroes' heads, with the words "WARNING! CHALLENGER APPROACHING!" emblazoned upon it. From the sky dropped a soldier clad entirely in green armour. The words on the banner changed, so that it now read "CONGRATULATIONS! YOU'VE UNLOCKED MASTER CHIEF!"
"Oh, hell no! Not in my fic!" I exclaimed, and lunged at the new fighter. "Hold on! Whaddaya mean, "Not in your fic"! You're the one writing it!" FD Link's disembodied head exclaimed. "Shaddup!" I wittily replied, and threw him with all my might at the Microsoft super-soldier. The two of them exploded in a blaze of blinding glory. I then warped myself back to the plain of reality so I could finish writing this story.
Lucario, who had been watching the earlier events unfold, had a sudden thought. "Why don't I finish off the weakened warriors while I still have a chance?" Suddenly, he heard an ominous voice behind him. "No, Lucario. This is my story, and Paint-Roller is a really cool character. Don't kill him." And like that, I vanished, never to return (at least, not for another couple of chapters anyway).
Aah, back in my chair… The only ones who aren't dead are Geno, Paint-Roller, MK, Lucario, Ridley, the Kongs and me (WW Link got eaten by a wolf). Join us next time for another exciting installment of Squenix: Battle of the Third-Parties!