DISCLAIMER:

I DO NOT OWN BEYBLADE: METAL FIGHT

Thanks, everyone, for reviewing and giving ideas! Blame my laziness, but I'm not going to be using so many dares, and I'm not gonna mention any names. Yeah, call me lazy. I WAS BORN THIS WAY, BABY!

"Welcome to the game show that we all love: TRUTH OR DARE!" I announced, spinning my Evil Maniac chair around. "This episode's gonna be a little longer than last time, because so many people reviewed! Thanks! Last night, after the show, we caught something on tape, outside the building. Give it up for Ryuga and his mommy!"

Ryuga scowled. "Gr..."

I ignored him and showed a picture of a red-headed woman pinching Ryuga's ear. And whacking him on the butt with a frying pan. AT THE SAME TIME! (A/N: Yeah, I'm using the same plot as the Ember of Despair.)

"Aw," Hyoma said. "He's a mommy's boy!"

"I hate this show," Ryuga grumbled.

"Yeah, we know, honey. Anyway, Ryuga. You're gonna have to wear a swim suit while singing the Volcanoid song: Lord of Darkness."

Ryuga sweatdropped. "Lord, help me... T_T ... What's the song?"

I played it for him.

He sweatdropped again. "I have to sing that?"

"In a swim suit!" Billy Bob showed him a pair of dark red swim trunks with gold trim. (A/N: Whenever I picture Ryuga going to the beach, this is always what I see him in.)

Ryuga took off his clothes (up to his underwear) and put the swim suit on.

"Oh God!" I fainted. My manager splashed water onto my face. "GET AWAY FROM ME, WOMAN!" I screamed, hitting her swith the bucket.

"Well once upon a time , I think is how it goes
In a country glorified and rid of all it's woes
There the lord of darkness spent his life without a care.
He who was a vampire with short stunning blue hair."

As Ryuga kept singing (he's a great singer, BTW), Hyoma and Hikaru sweatdropped. "He doesn't have blue hair."

But the song didn't suit Ryuga. And that was why we were laughing.

Ryuga was almost as red as his swim suit as he sang the ending.

"Stuck inside a cell , his stamina it fell.
Ahh , the lord of darkness almost gave up.
Left inside an empty prison , feeling really pissed.
He forgot that he can willingly transform himself to mist."

I applauded. "CONSIDER AUDITIONING FOR AMERICAN IDOL!"

Ryuga changed back into his normal clothes and hid under his coat again. He's been doing that a lot.

"Yu and Kenta: Cause a domino-style fall over line with everyone then sing Hakuna Matata!"

"On it!" Yu quickly fell onto Kenta, who fell onto Gingka, who fell onto Madoka, who fell onto Hikaru, and on and on.

Unfortunately, Ryuga was at the end of the line and there was no one to soften his landing. "OUCH!"

Then, the two burst into song.

"Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase!
Hakuna Matata!
Ain't no passing craze!
It means no worries, for the rest of your days!
It's our problem-freeeeeee... philosophy!
Hakuna Matata!"

I clapped. "You guys are all good singers, I think. I'm serious. You should become superstars!"

Ryuga sweatdropped. "We're already the laughingstock of the world. What more could we possibly want?" he exclaimed sarcastically.

"Haha. I'm not stupid. I would want to be both! Tsubasa: Have you ever had your hair down when your NOT injured? That reminds me, manager-lady! Bring me the hairdryer!" I started to dry my hair.

Tsubasa sweatdropped. "When I take a bath?"

"Kyoya: And have you ever been attacked by a lion or lioness? Do you know Swahili or any other African language?"

"... T_T ... I'm from Japan... we don't have a lot of lions here."

"Gingka: Why is your hair SO spikey?"

"It's natural!"

"Ryuga: Give Gingka, Tsubasa and Kyoya Rugby tackles! And take Gingka to dancing lessons!"

"WHAT?" the four of them yelled.

But Ryuga tackled each of them anyway. "I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THIS!"

Gingka was trying to stand up. "I think I broke something."

"Like your pride?" Kyoya snapped. "Yeah, I definitely broke that two days ago."

"Just stop complaining, you whiny babies!" Ryuga hissed.

"You're just saying that 'cause you enjoyed it!" Tsubasa huffed.

"We can't wait too long, but my manager here is good at the salsa. She can teach it to you two." I pointed at Ryuga and Gingka.

They glanced at each other. "Huh?"

My manager came in and started teaching them the salsa.

In five minutes, Ryuga and Gingka were salsa-ing all over the place. Nile was saying, "Vamos, amigos! Uno, dos, tres!" which was kind of funny since he's Egyptian... Well, anyway, Gingka was going the girl's part, although he complained about it.

When they were done, they stayed as far away from each other as they could.

"Ryuga why is most of your hair white did you bleach it?"

"No. Will everyone get used to the fact that EVERYONE has weird hair?"

"Yeah, yeah, you said that a hundred times already!" Yu said, licking the new ice-cream cone that Billy Bob gave to him.

"Ryuga and Gingka: Swap clothes with each other for the entire episode."

Ryuga made a face. "Does that include underwear and Beys?"

"Yes."

"EW!" Gingka danced around like the floor was hot.

"That's disgusting!" Ryuga said.

"You have to do it!"

Gingka looked around. "Um... will everyone please turn around?"

We did. Or at least, the camera guy and everyone else did.

Then, something crashed onto the floor. "GINGKA! Look what you made me do!"

The camera guy got a little curious.

"AH! TURN AROUND!" Gingka yelled.

Ryuga glared at the screen. "AND STOP DROOLING, PERVERT!"

"Sorry!" I said. I smirked and held up a picture. "This'll be my dirty little secret." I laughed evilly and put the photograph into my pocket, then locked it. Yeah, that's right people! I have a pocket that could be locked with a key!

When everyone turned around, they laughed.

First of all, Ryuga's clothes were too big for Gingka. He just couldn't get the dragon gauntlet on his wrist!

And Ryuga kept on scratching his forehead. "How could you stand to wear this thing?" He pulled at the scarf. "It's so hot in here!" Then, he scratched his wrists.

Oh yeah, and one more thing: Gingki's clothes were too small for Ryuga, so whenever he took a step in those clown shoes, he winced.

Ouch.

"Let's move on!" I giggled. "Yu, Kyoya, and Ryuga: Act like Benkei."

"W-What?"

"BU-BU-BU-BULL! THAT'S OUR KYOYA!" Ryuga yelled, rubbing Gingka's shoe onto the ground. He snorted.

"DARK BULL RED HORN UPPERCUT!" Yu punched the air.

"I WANT BURGERS, AND I WANT THEM NOW!" Kyoya shouted. "NO, I DON'T CARE THAT YOU GUYS ARE OUT! JUST ORDER SOME MORE!"

"Am I really that loud?" Benkei asked.

"YES! BU-BU-BU-BULL!" Yu, Kyoya, and Ryuga chorused.

Benkei: T_T

"Tsubasa: eat KFC in front of Eagle."

"W-WHAT?" Tsubasa looked like he was gonna cry again. "B-But that's the reason I don't eat poultry!"

I pressed the "Wak-wak-wak..." button. "Too bad, so sad."

Billy Bob handed Tsubasa some KFC chicken, and brought him Eagle.

Tsubasa bit into the chicken. Eagle screeched and flew away.

"NO WAIT! EAGLE! That was a dare!" Now Tsubasa really started crying.

I sighed and pressed the intercom. "Clean up in the game room! Tsubasa's getting poor Yu and Ryuga wet! Oh yeah, and get the psychiatrist! And the vet!"

Tsubasa was taken into the corner by the nice guy named Dr. Feel-Better.

Dr. Kitty-Poo was trying to get Eagle by tasering him. So far, she wasn't successful.

Then the janitor came in and started grumbling, "Stupid kid," as he mopped up the floor.

That only made Tsubasa cry louder.

"Hyoma: Dress up as a playboy bunny from Vegas."

Hyoma gulped as Billy Bob handed him the tight outfit.

He slipped into it and Chao Xin wolf-whistled.

"NO!" Tsubasa threw a KFC bucket against the wall, hitting Nile in the head. "I WANT MY EAGLE!"

Nile got up and took the bucket off his head. "Ra, help me."

Then, he threw the bucket back to Tsubasa, but ended up hitting Dr. Feel-Better.

"Kenta and Benkei: Play leap frog around the room until you drop."

Kenta jumped over Benkei easily. Then, when it was Benkei's turn, both of them fell.

"We're done!" Kenta said lamely. "Wow, Benkei. Kyoya wasn't kidding about how heavy you are."

"Hmph!"

I grinned. "As amusing it was to see you guys fail, I have a show I need to wrap up. This is for everyone minus the Chinese team, Gingka, and Madoka: Where are your parents?"

Kenta: "My mom and dad are watching me right now."

Benkei: "I ran away, so I don't really know."

Yu: "Both are dead."

Kyoya made the "dead" sign (AKA, slicing his finger across his throat).

Nile sighed. "Both of them are in Egypt. My dad's in jail and my mom's in an asylum."

Hyoma: "I'm adopted." Then, he got anime tears. "Hokuto just told me that last month!"

Hikaru: "My mom's sick in the hospital. My dad's dead."

"You saw my mom," Ryuga said. "My dad got murdered."

I almost cried. "Why?"

Ryuga scowled. "HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?"

"Aren't you sad?" Gingka tilted his head to the side.

"Why would I be sad?" Ryuga then started crying. "DADDY, I MISS YOU!"

I jumped up and down. "I wanna hug him!"

So I did. And he hugged me BAAACK!

I was doing a happy dance in my head. I stuck my tongue out at Hikaru and mouthed, "I hugged him before you did!"

Then, I went back to the rec room and said, "I'm never washing my shirt again."

Ryuga stopped crying. I think he just remembered that he was on TV. "You saw nothing!" he growled.

I sweatdropped. "OOOOOkay... Ryuga: Put a 'punch me' sign on your back and leave it on you for the whole day! Including after the show! I have my peoples!"

Billy Bob handed Ryuga a "PUNCH ME" sign and used a dozen safety pins to attach it to the back of his (Gingka's) jacket. Then, everyone in the room lined up in front of Ryuga and started punching him everywhere.

And I mean everywhere. Mei-Mei socked him in the part where it hurts the most.

"Ryuga: go out in public, yell, 'My butt itches,' scratch it, then say, 'All better!'" I said.

Ryuga growled and I switched to the outside camera.

A whole crowd of people were watching the show from the gigantic TV screen in front of the building (because now I'm filthy rich!).

They were sitting on bleachers.

Then, some random kid popped up on camera and said, "Hi Mom!"

Ryuga came out. At least a dozen people came up and punched him. The rest were cowering because he looked like he was about to murder someone.

"MY BUTT ITCHES!" Ryuga yelled. Then, he scratched it. "ALL BETTER!"

I almost went deaf from the laughter of the people.

Ryuga blushed and went back inside.

"THAT WAS HILARIOUS!" Hikaru giggled.

"No need to sound so smug about it," Ryuga grumbled.

Everyone looked at them.

"Weird..." Kenta said.

"Ryuga: Sing the 'I love you' Barney song with all the emotion."

"WHAT? WHY?"

"So you do know Barney!"

"Of course I do! I HATE BARNEY! HE'S SO ANNOYING!"

"SING!"

Ryuga gulped.

"I love you.
You love me.
We're a happy family.
With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you.
Won't you say you love me too?"

His face looked like an angel, and his voice was pretty close.

I punched the table, laughing. That angel face sooooo didn't suit him! "Tsubasa: Do the chicken dance!"

Tsubasa stood up and pushed Dr. Feel-Better into the wall. "FINE! AS LONG AS YOU *BLEEP*ING GET MY EAGLE BACK!"

"Okey-dokey!"

I especially laughed when he wiggled his butt.

"Ryuga: What's the dumbest thing you've ever done that wasn't part of a dare?"

Ryuga looked at me, scratching his forehead again. "Do I have to?"

I held up the remote.

"I... I..." His face turned red. "Face Nemesis alone?"

I snorted. "Yeah. That was dumb. But that wasn't the dumbest, right?"

"I thought it would be a good idea to squeeze lemon juice into my best friend's eyes," Ryuga said. Then, he added lamely, "It backfired."

"Ouch. Ryuga:What are your interests and what do you look for in a girl?"

"Beyblade is my life. And I like strong-willed girls. The ones who aren't afraid to speak up. She needs to be confident, and smart, and has the ability to be a great blader, even if people push her down. One who could put up with me. Oh yeah, and she has to be pretty, too."

"Dammit." I started putting on makeup.

"To all the male bladers: Do you have any other talents besides Beyblading? Let's go alphabetically."

Benkei: "Eating!"

"... T_T ... Is that even a talent?" I muttered.

Chao Xin: "Lookin' good!"

"Got that right," Mei Mei grumbled.

Chi Yun: "Math."

"NERD!" Chao Xin yelled.

Da Shan: "Martial Arts."

"Awesome!" I said.

Gingka: "Burping the alphabet!"

Hyoma: "Making shish-kebabs."

Kenta: "Dancing!"

"Really?"

Kyoya muttered something inaudible.

"What was that?"

"The guitar!"

I screamed fan-girlishly. "YES! I KNEW IT!"

Nile: "Running."

Ryuga: "Singing, probably."

"Yeah," I said. "You are pretty good at that."

"It's hereditary!"

Tsubasa: "Jumping really high, I think."

"No wonder you have Eagle."

Tsubasa started crying again. Dr. Kitty-Poo still hasn't tasered Eagle.

Yu: "People say I'm really friendly. Does that count as a talent?"

"No." I sweatdropped. "That's your personality."

"Um... super senses."

"Oh yeah!" I remembered the Survival Battle. "Ryuga: Sing a sappy love song."

"N-No way!" Ryuga crossed his arms stubbornly. "I'm tired of people making me sing!"

"Do. It. Now."

"I don't know any love songs."

"LIAR! I HEARD YOU LISTENING TO WHAT HURTS THE MOST BY RASCAL FLATTS LAST NIGHT!" I screamed.

"STALKER!"

"SING!"

"I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house.
That don't bother me.
I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out.

I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while even though
Goin' on with you gone still upsets me.
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay.
But that's not what gets me.

What hurts the most,
Is being so close.
And having so much to say,
And watching you walk away.

And never knowin'
What could've been.
And not seein' that I'm lovin' you
Is what I was tryin' to do..."

By the time he was finished, I was about to scream. "HE ACTUALLY SANG! AND HE WAS SOOOOO GOOD! So tell me, Ryuga," I leaned forward, almost falling off my Evil Maniac chair. "Who's the lucky girl?"

He blushed. "No one."

"Alright," I sighed. "Since it's not a dare, I'll let you go."

He sighed in relief.

"Chao Xin: Sit through an entire yaoi OVA without closing your eyes."

Billy Bob brought in a CD holding it with safety gloves. He put Chao Xin into a big box, then pressed a button on a TV remote.

"Ooh... this is an interesting start. What's yaoi, anyway?"

"Mei-Mei, kiss the person you have a crush on."

Mei-Mei went into the box and a smooching sound came out, followed by a blushing Mei-Mei. "There! Happy?"

"You got spunk, sister!" I said.

"Thanks."

I heard Chao Xin dancing inside and smirked.

"Da Shan, Ryuga and Kyoya: Go outside and be pedophiles until you hear sirens."

"WHAT?"

Ryuga looked upset. "I'm not having sex with a little kid."

"Neither am I!" Da Shan growled.

"Got that right," Kyoya said.

"Look. Just pretend," I scoffed.

"NO!"

Then, Ryuga said, "I'd personally rather have the Evil Robots."

"Agreed," Kyoya said. Da Shan shrugged. "Yeah."

Everyone stared at them in shock.

I grinned evilly and pressed the button.

A bunch of robots rushed into the room and started to grab for their clothes.

"What the... ARE YOU *BLEEP*ING SERIOUS?" Ryuga screeched.

"You thought I was kidding?" I smirked. "I never kid."

I snorted back a laugh.

"Great. You little- OW! That's sensitive!" Ryuga squeaked.

The robots exited the room.

Hikaru, Madoka, and Mei-Mei turned scarlet and looked away.

"*BLEEP*ING *BLEEP* ROBOTS! *BLEEP* THIS *BLEEP*ING SHOW! *BLEEP*ING *BLEEP! I'LL *BLEEP*ING MURDER YOU ALL!" Kyoya screamed.

Ryuga said even worse things as he massaged his... whatever the robot had injured. His mother must be waiting for him outside.

Da Shan was just sitting there, his eyes as wide as saucers. "*BLEEP*!"

I was staring at the screen.

Then, they scrambled for their clothes.

"Da Shan, that's my shirt! No one sits on my shirt!"

"Could you pass over the pants, please?"

"Anyone seen my coat?"

Once they were dressed, they glared at me.

"Hey, you were the ones who didn't want to become pedophiles." I raised my hands defensively.

Ryuga curled up underneath his coat.

"Chi Yun and Kenta: jump from a bridge into a raging river."

Billy Bob took them to this nearby river just outside the city. "It just flooded from all the rain we had a couple of days ago!" I said into the speakers.

Chi Yun and Kenta went to the middle of the bridge and looked at the whirling torrents. Then, they looked at each other, took a deep breath...

Ryuga leaned towards the screen. "Come on."

The two boys jumped into the water. Spluttering and coughing, they bobbed in and out of the water for a few seconds.

"Mommy, wook!" a little boy pointed at the water. "Wittew fishies!"

Billy Bob fished them out with a net and looked at the little boy.

Who stared with his mouth open. "Big man," he whispered.

When Chi Yun and Kenta came back, everyone fussed over them.

"Give the little guys some air," Kyoya said.

Suddenly, Chao Xin screamed from inside his box. "NO! I CAN'T TAKE THIS! LET ME OUT!" He banged frantically from inside.

I turned the volume dial on my remote and his screams were muted.

"Kyoya: Snuggle with a cute lion plushie for the entire episode tomorrow. Make sure you bring one, or I will." I gave him a death glare.

Gulp.

When I read the next dare, I squealed. "Ryuga and Kyoya: Sing 'Sexy and I Know It' without shirts."

Ryuga and Kyoya looked at each other, like, "Here we go again," and took off their shirts. Once again, I stared at them.

Ryuga: "When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly."

Kyoya: "I pimp to the beat, walking down the street in my new lafreak, yeah.
This is how I roll, animal print, pants out control.
It's RedFoo with the big afro."

Ryuga: "And like Bruce Lee I've got the claw."

Kyoya: "Girl look at that body."

Ryuga: "Girl look at that body."

Kyoya: "Girl look at that body."

Both: "I work out."

Ryuga: "Girl look at that body."

Kyoya: "Girl look at that body."

Ryuga: "Girl look at that body."

Both: "I work out."

Kyoya: "When I walk in the spot, this is what I see.
Everybody stops and they staring at me."

Ryuga: "I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it."

Kyoya: "Show it."
Ryuga: "Show it."

Kyoya: "I'm sexy and I know it."
Ryuga: "I'm sexy and I know it."

"Wait! Keep singing!" I said. "Madoka, Hikaru, and Mei-Mei: Belly dance with those two and wear the proper outfits."

Billy Bob handed the girls the "proper outfits." Then, they got into the dressing room and came out wearing really tight skirts and tops that showed their stomachs.

Pink for Madoka, darker pink for Mei-Mei, and blue for Hikaru.

Ryuga and Kyoya almost stopped singing, then turned red when the three girls started dancing around them.

Hikaru blushed when she accidentally collided into Ryuga.

"Nile: Who do you like? Kiss that person."

"She's back in Egypt."

"Bummer. Oh well, care to tell us who she is?"

"No."

"Okay. EVIL ROBOTS!"

"HER NAME IS CLEO!"

"Cleo? As in, like, Cleopatra?"

"Yeah."

"Kyoya: Kiss Hikaru!"

Kyoya choked on the lyrics. "I'm s- WHAT?"

"Keep singing!"

He kissed Hikaru anyway... on the cheek. He missed her lips because she was moving around too much. She reddened. "Uh..."

"This is the end of today's episode of Truth or Dare! 'Night, folks!"

Thanks!