Chapter four: Family Friendly Stockholm Syndrome

Kyle was walking back to Stan's house after that chat with Wendy. It was best if he went back there instead of his home, he thought. For one, he KNEW Stan was going to open a bottle of whiskey. Worse even: his dad was going to open a bottle of whiskey with him. Besides, he knew Stan, and all of them for that matter, saw Cartman's house as a safe haven. They'd go there, not even knocking on the fucking door and storm in. Cartman would complain, be his selfish asshole self, and they'd end up playing xbox, drinking a few beers and eating junk food. If they could rely on Cartman to be a selfish, bigoted asshole, then the world was still in place. There was a BIG chance Stan would end up in Cartman's house if he kept drinking. And Kyle KNEW Cartman would be having sex with Wendy by now. He really needed to extract that mental image from his brain, by the way. He was now wondering if they engaged in nazi dress up sex or had her call him 'mein Füher' during it. Now, he was thinking of screwing a drill through his brain.

When he got to Stan's house, his suspicions were confirmed. Stan didn't even bother getting a fucking glass, he was chugging that bottle by the neck.

"Hey Kyle… Thought you were going home…" Stan said, very depressed. He was smoking a cigarrete. It was never a good sign when Stan lighted a cigarrete.

"I thought it wasn't a good idea to leave you all by yourself. Guess I was right" Kyle said

"I know… I feel so bad… Like something's broken. Like I don't know anything anymore" Stan said.

'God, he's back to that fucking goth phase. I HATE IT!' Kyle thought.

"Who is it, Kyle?" Stan asked taking another sip from the bottle

"Who is who?" Kyle asked, playing dumb

"Wendy's boyfriend. You know who is it and you're hiding it from me so I won't freak out. Well, I'm freaking out already, so just say it and I can kick his fucking ass" Stan said in a mixture of anger and pain

Kyle exhaled in exhaustion

"First of all, quit it. I'm not gonna tell you so you go out and make a fucking fool of yourself. Second, you can't fight him. Trust me"

"It's Token, isn't it? That black asshole…"

Kyle sighed in annoyance. My God, what the fuck is wrong with him?

"Token?" He said "You can't be that clueless, Stan!"

"I just wanna know who it is!"

"UGH!" Kyle cried from exhaustion. A normal Stan was the best friend anyone could wish. A Stan having an emotional crisis, however, was worse than dealing with Cartman when he had a shot at a big sum of money.

Kyle poured himself a rather tall glass of Jack and started drinking as well. This was going to be a very long night

-The next morning, Cartman's house-

Wendy woke up by the side of her lover, both completely naked. They didn't have the energy to put clothes back on last night. She fell asleep resting her head on his chest. Her favorite pillow. It made her feel protected. Like nothing could harm her. Nothing mattered but Eric Cartman's warm and comforting embrace.

Cartman had a little sister now. Lily. Of course no one knew who the father was, although Cartman highly suspected Mr. Mackey. She was 5 now, and had little to nothing in common with her brother. Sure, they looked alike with the same brown hair and those unmistakable eyes. But she was really sweet. She loved Disney princess movies. Specially Beauty and the Beast. She was watching it downstairs and Wendy could hear the main song.

Never like before, ever just as sure as the sun will rise…

She held Cartman tighter as she listened to it. Her Beast. This was her perfect moment. Cartman was awake now, but he said nothing and just embraced her lovingly.

One of the advantages of dating Eric was the cuddling. It just felt great. Like she just fit right into his arm and chest.

"Good morning, Eric" She said softly. Almost like a sigh.

"Good morning. Sleep good?" he asked

"Best sleep in ages" she answered in content.

He hugged her again, got up and started putting his clothes on. So did her. He got some lousy shorts and a Slayer shirt. She just threw one of his football jerseys, some panties and the same skirt from yesterday. They went downstairs to find Lily siting on the couch. She jumped at both of them hugging them.

"Breakfast!" Lianne yelled from the kitchen

They spent the morning eating Lianne's pancakes, bacon, eggs and sausages and watching Beauty and the Beast. Or "Family Friendly Stockholm Syndrome Documentary" as Cartman liked to call it. A nice, quiet morning…

Until Wendy told Cartman that a certain Jew knew their secret.

"Goddamn it! You wanna keep this a fucking secret and you go and tell Kahl about it? He's gonna tell Stan in two fucking seconds, you stupid ho!" Cartman yelled at her

"I didn't tell him! He figured it out by himself, you stupid fuck!" what a loving couple.

Like most small kids, Lilly had the habit of watching the same movie a thousand times. So, she just put Beauty and the Beast to run again. She watched her brother and his girlfriend argue and felt puzzled. It was always the same thing: they'd bicker about some nonsense, end up in a discussion that didn't even have anything to do with their original topic and start kissing each other.

"That's why I hate you goddamn hippies!" Cartman yelled at his girlfriend, as if to prove Lily's point

"Just because I care about the environment doesn't mean I'm a hippie, you nazi bastard!"

As she switched her eyes to the TV, the scene where Belle tends to the Beast's arm was on. She looked back and forth between the scene and the couple's bickering and came to an interesting conclusion. She then got up, walked right to her brother and hugged them both. They seemed to have forgotten all about their fight and smiled to her.

"What did you do that for, Lily?" Wendy said to little girl

"I just realized I have my favorite Disney couple right here at home" She said walking back to the couch.

"What couple?" Cartman asked

"Beauty and the Beast" Lily answered pointing to the two of them

Wendy and Cartman just kissed each other in a loving manner.

"We might have a slight case of Stockholm syndrome for each other" Cartman joked as Wendy hugged him and laughed.

Author's note: I don't actually think Beauty and the Beast is about Stockholm Syndrome. I'm just joking. Crazy stuff happening in the next chapter