A/N: I know I COMPLETELY SUCK! It's just i've sort of lost momentum on this story...idk...I'll keep writing though, it's just tough for me to get it where I want it to go. I guess I hate filler chapters, but they're necessary, so I dread writing them. Anyway, this chapter is a lead up to the next chapter...

About Breaking Dawn: I HATED IT! I guess that's why I lost momentum on the Bella/Edward thing. I felt like the plot was a bad fanfiction, and completely ruined the whole purpose of Eclipse, because Bella was able to have her old life and her vampire life in one. I thought that was unfair. And Jake is like my dream guy, and I didn't like him for Bella, I thought he should have been able to be free from her forever, and then he imprints on the mutant spawn. Is she kidding? I guess that's why I was extremely furious and really started to hate the book because Jake's fate wasn't fair to him. As far as I'm concerned, Breaking Dawn doesn't exist.

Okay glad I could rant, finally. HAHA. Alright on with the chapter...

Bella POV

I awoke the next morning to the delicious aroma of waffles filling the air. Strange considering I was the only one that ever cooked in the apartment. I looked at my clock and realized I had slept later than anticipated, probably since I couldn't fall asleep last night. I'd been thinking too much about not thinking about Edward. It didn't work.

I dragged myself out of bed and headed into the kitchen to see Emmett and Jasper sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee with papers in hand. I could tell already that they were morning people.

"Good morning Bella!" Emmett exclaimed from the too-small table.

I grunted in response. I wasn't physically or mentally awake until I had my morning jolt of coffee in me. I grabbed a mug and filled it to the brim with coffee. I took a gigantic sip. Delicious.

"It smells incredible. Where are the waffles?"

Jasper and Emmett both chuckled as they pointed to a plate on the counter. I was shocked. There was a whole array of fruit and waffles set out. I was in waffle heaven.

"Who made these?" I asked as I bit into one. "They're incredible!"

I heard someone chuckle behind me and I turned to see Edward smirking in the doorway. "I'm glad you're enjoying them."

I smiled timidly and nodded, cursing myself for digging in like a high school football player. Alice and Rosalie emerged from their rooms looking exactly like I did: disheveled and half asleep. They both poured themselves coffee and dug into the delicious waffles without making a sound. Mornings were quiet around here.

"So I'm guessing you girls aren't morning people?" Jasper stated rather then asked.

"Mhm." Alice responded as she stuffed another forkful of waffle into her mouth.

"These are orgasmic! Seriously Edward, where did you get the recipe?" Rosalie asked. The way she said orgasmic made Emmett fidget in his and shift his position...I was the only one to notice, but I found it funny how Rose could make Emmett hard with just one word.

"From one of my favorite cookbooks; cooking has always been relaxing for me, and I found this amazing cookbook once. I now own all of them, and have become pretty skilled at cooking thanks to Marie Anthony."

As soon as the name left his mouth, Alice, Rosalie, and I all choked on our waffles. The boys looked at us like we were crazy and we just stared at each other, not knowing what to say.

Unfortunately for me Rosalie was the second coming of the devil and decided to be funny. "I heard that in real life Marie Anthony is a real slut."

Alice stared in disbelief at Rosalie for a moment before understanding the joke. "Oh yea, totally. I heard that she bribes famous chefs for their recipes by sleeping with them, and then claims them as her own." They both chuckled at my expense. If only I had some sort of blackmail on them.

"I highly doubt that's true." Edward replied. I could kiss him in this moment! He truly was an angel!

"No, we know her. She's the biggest slut in the world." Rosalie replied, daring me to say something.

"Ha ha Rose. Very funny. She's not a slut, at all. She's only ever slept with three guys in her whole life, and all of her recipes are her own. We all know you're just jealous of her brilliant cooking abilities and amazing recipes. It's okay, but one thing Rose: green's not really your color." I smiled smugly at her and then Alice as I was jumping with joy inside at my victory.

Or so I thought. "Yea, you're right Bells, she's not a slut. Actually, Edward, you two would probably get along really well. In fact I know you'd get along. Would you be interested in possibly meeting her for drinks one night? I'm sure she'd love to get to know you."

"Are you kidding, Eddie boy talks about this woman's cookbook non-stop. 'Marie this, and Marie that,' seriously, he's obsessed…it's like she's his God or something. Everything he cooks revolves around this woman's recipes. It's an unhealthy obsession." Emmett so gladly added, unconsciously knowing that he was pushing me into a deeper and deeper hole.

"So Edward, what's it going to be?" Alice egged Edward on.

"I guess drinks wouldn't hurt. I'd love to actually talk to her about some of the recipes. Maybe she would take some of the recipes I've created. You know what Rose, it's a great idea. I'd love to meet up with her for drinks."

I internally groaned as I plastered a fake smile on my face. This was going to be sufficiently awkward.

"Great I'll call her and tell her tomorrow night to meet you at Eclipse for drinks around seven?"

Edward nodded his head and smiled. His eyes darted back and forth from me to Rose to gage my reaction. My face was calm and collected, no traces of my internal freak-out showing at all. Freaking out because A) I'd have to meet him tomorrow and tell him that he shares a bathroom with Marie Anthony and B) because he had said yes, which means getting him to be roped into me was going to be harder than I imagined.

xoxo

Breakfast dragged on until I finally pulled myself away from the table and into my room to prepare for my day off. Today I was free of meetings or catering or anything that had to do with my job. I was free to do whatever my heart desired.

Unfortunately for me, Alice was also void of anything to do which meant she would no doubt be dragging me to some store to get me an outfit to wear tomorrow night. As if on cue, there was a knock on my door. I was still angry at them both for doing that to me; I hated people knowing I was Marie Anthony when they didn't have to know. It was none of his business…I should just stand him up tomorrow night.

"Bella can we come in?" Alice asked in a sweet tone. I could tell she was trying her best to coax me into opening the door for her.

"No."

"Bells please?" Rose whined.

"No. Go away."

I heard my door opening and I groaned, throwing myself back under the covers of my bed, hoping they would go away on their own.

"Bella we're sorry." Alice said sheepishly.

"Yea Bells. Sorry."

I sighed. "Whatever. It's fine."

"Oh Bella, we know you better then that. Look, I did it because I thought this could be like an unofficial date between you two. Like you're going on a date, but not technically because he doesn't know it's you."

"Well he's going to find out tomorrow night Rose. You know that I don't like people knowing that's who I am. I use a pseudonym for a reason."

Alice sighed. "Bella, I have a feeling that Edward isn't some temporary guy in our lives…especially yours. I think that if you let him in on this little secret, it'll help break down those barriers you've put up."

"What barriers?"

Rose rolled her eyes as she adjusted her position on my bed. "You know, the moment Mike broke up with you, you closed up your heart again. Doubting yourself, doing that thing you always do every time you feel insignificant. Just give it a chance to blossom."

Little did they both know I wanted more than anything to give us a chance to blossom. I just wasn't sure how ready I was to take the next step. I mean, he's probably no longer interested. He did agree to go out on a date with another woman…then again I turned him down and have no claim to him whatsoever. I mean, I don't want to be with someone when they aren't going to last forever. It just makes it that much more difficult to open my heart when it probably won't last. I just need to stop feeling so small compared to him and just be.

"You're right."

"I know."

"I'm going to stop feeling insignificant and channel my inner Rosalie."

Rose and I started laughing, when I noticed Alice pouting on her side of my bed.

"What's wrong Alice?"

"Why can't you channel your inner Alice?"

"I'm sorry…I'll also channel my inner Alice who has excellent fashion sense."

"Thank you."

I smiled. I was starting to feel better about what they did. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad letting Edward in on my little secret. Who knows, maybe some of his recipes that he mentioned aren't so bad….heck after tasting his waffles, I know they're probably amazing.

"Now, there's one last piece of business to discuss with you Bella…"

"What's that?" I asked Alice skeptically.

"Your ensemble for tomorrow night. It has to scream 'I'm a sexy, confident, women' but it also has to have a little vulnerability. And I'm assuming you don't have any little dress like that so we're going to have to go shopping."

I groaned. "Alice, can't you just go without me and then bring back something?"

"Bella, Bella, Bella, you can't buy a car without test driving it right? You can't just expect me to pick out something for you. I need you there to try things on so I can determine what would be most appropriate."

"You're full of it Alice. You know within ten seconds of seeing a dress how it'll look on me."

"Regardless, you're coming. I want you ready to go in a half hour missy."

I groaned into my pillow but nodded my head. This was going to be a long day.

xoxo

"Bella come on let me see it…"

I banged my head against the dressing room door for probably the millionth time. I was trying on my hundredth dress and already my feet were killing me and I was starting to get snappy.

"This better be the one Alice, or I swear I will hit you over the head with the arm from one of the mannequins."

"Just let me see it Bella." Alice never took my threats seriously, besides she could probably beat me up better then I could her.

I threw open the door and walked out. I stared Alice down as she appraised my outfit.

"Perfect." She said with a glow in her eyes. "Edward will die when he sees you."

"Great." I said with as little emotion as possible.

Alice and I quickly paid for my dress, found shoes, and headed into Sephora's for all new make-up.

Shopping with Alice was more of a chore then anything else. With my new purchases in hand, we took a taxi back to the apartment and settled in for a comfortable evening at home.

"Hey guys!" We turned to see Rose walk through the door with the boys in tow. She had spent the day with them coming up with decorating ideas and consulting with them on possible room colors.

"Hey Rose!" We both said in unison.

"What's on the agenda for tonight?"

"I was thinking we could stay in and watch some movies….maybe play a round of I Never?" Alice said with a smirk on her face. Rose nodded and told the boys the plan.

We all changed into something more comfortable as we met in the living room, accompanied by bottles of Grey Goose and Tequila.

Rose put on Top Gun as background noise for our game playing.

"Okay, we all know the rules? Everyone goes around saying something they've never done, and whoever has done it takes a shot. Any questions?" Rose looked around, and when no one raised there hand, she decided to go first.

"I've never had sex in a public bathroom." Great, she was starting out with subtlety. NOT!

I looked around and noticed Emmett was the only one to take a shot. He was next.

"Okay, um…I've never had an affair with someone who was married." No one took a shot.

Jasper sighed when he realized he was next. "I've never bought edible underwear." His eyes went wide when Rose, and Alice and Emmett all took a shot.

I noticed the game was starting out slow, not sure which sexual questions were deemed appropriate, but I knew that the drunker everyone got, the naughtier the questions were going to get.

Alice was up next, and she had an evil glint in her eye. "I've never had sex in the back of a limo." I sighed as I took my shot.

It seems no one else has ever had sex in the back of a limo because they were all staring at me with wide eyes…well the guys were at least. I couldn't even bear to look at Edward's face. I already knew mine was 10 shades of red.

Edward was next. "I've never had a threesome." We all looked around, and I couldn't say I was shocked when both Emmett and Rose took a shot. I knew Rose had had many sexual escapades and for some reason it didn't surprise me that Emmett has as well.

I was next and I knew exactly who I was targeting. "I never slept with a professor in college so that I could pass the class."

Everyone looked around the room and was shocked when Alice was the one taking the shot instead of Rose. I laughed out loud and shot her a glance that said "If that's the way you want to play it…"

The game continued for a few more rounds, and just as I thought the statements were either getting naughtier or targeting someone.

"I never had a fantasy about Rosalie and Desmond's mom." Emmett said as Jasper and Alice both took shots. We looked at Alice and she just shrugged. "What? Your mom is hot Rose."

We were too tipsy to even care…it was just too funny. "I never jacked off in front of a mirror." Jasper slurred as both Emmett and Edward took shots. I swore I saw Edward blush, but then again it might have been the alcohol.

"I never had a sex dream about any of the guys in this room." Alice said. I was internally struggling…should I take the shot and admit that I did? If Rose took one then I'd take one. Shit…she took one. I sighed and took a shot, not daring to look up. I wasn't going to admit to anyone that in my not thinking about Edward last night, I may have gotten a little carried away.

Alice snickered and I looked over at her as she stuck her tongue out at me.

Edward went next, and he looked over at me and smirked. "I never joined the mile high club."

Alice, Rosalie, and Emmett all took shots.

My turn. This time, Alice was going to pay. "I never said that I didn't have a sex dream when I really did." Alice glared at me and took a shot.

The rest of the night went like that, until finally we were too drunk to function anymore. We were spread out all over the living room, too tired and incompetent to make it back to our respected sleeping areas. My head was on Edward's chest and I noticed Alice curled next to Jasper, and Rosalie was practically on top of Emmett.

I soon drifted off to sleep, dreaming of the beautiful creature underneath me, hoping that one day, maybe, I could open myself up enough to let him in. If he wanted me that is.

And I soon started thinking of the next night to come. How would Edward react to my double life? Only time will tell I guess.

A/N: Okay seriously: DID IT SUCK? DOes this story suck?? Do you like where I'm going? I'm not sure anymore! UGH! HAHAHA

Just let me know if you guys have ideas and whatnot. I'd really like constructive feedback. I'm sorry these chapters take so long to post, but I'm just not as into this story as I was...plus I'm getting really bored this summer and I'm anxious for school to start again (so i can see my friends.) I'll try to post as much as I can in the next two weeks before school starts. Love yous!

Song of the chapter: Dirty Little Secret by Pillar

Review please!