All characters belong to Janet Evanovich

Warning: Angst and touchy subject matter

Chapter 5

Bobby arrived at the house an hour and a half later. Ranger let him through the door and he went straight into the living room, where Stephanie was sitting on the couch, staring at the blank television screen. She looked up in surprise when he sat beside her.

"Bobby!" She didn't even hear the doorbell ring. "When did you get here?"

"Just got here, Bombshell," Bobby gave her a small smile, studying her face. "It's good to see you, sweetie. We've missed having you around."

Guilt swept through her at his words. Her face fell slightly. "I'm sorry. I haven't been myself lately."

Bobby reached out and covered her hand with his. It was a comforting feeling. "No need to apologize, Steph. You've had a tough time."

Stephanie began to fidget. She began to wonder who else might know about her "tough time".

"Ranger said you wanted to talk to me," Bobby continued, his voice even and soothing. "Are you still comfortable with that?"

Stephanie paused a minute before nodding.

"Do you want Ranger to stay in the room or do you want him to leave us alone?"

Stephanie swallowed nervously. She didn't want to be a bother to them. "He can stay if he wants, but I really don't want to burden either one of you."

"Stephanie, you've never been a burden." Bobby said firmly.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Ranger slowly walk over to one of the club chairs in front of the picture window. He sat down silently.

Bobby turned slightly on the sofa, facing her. "Can you tell me what's going on?"

Stephanie snorted. "I was kind of hoping you could tell me."

"Can you tell me when you started feeling differently?"

Stephanie thought back. Wracking her brain for the right answer. "I…I'm not exactly sure. I think it was right after Ranger left. So I guess about two months ago?"

Bobby nodded, reaching over on the coffee table for a pad of paper and a pen. "Would it be okay if I wrote some of this down, Steph?"

"You're not going to show it to anybody else, are you?" The last thing she needed was for a report on her mental health to end up as front-page news. Extra Extra, The Bombshell Bounty Hunter Loses her Marbles!

"Nobody will ever know about it unless you decide to tell them," he promised, setting the paper on his lap.

Stephanie stared at the pen in his hand. "I guess it's okay, then."

Bobby wrote something down before looking back up at her. "Did anything happen after Ranger left this last time? Any problems with skips or friends and family?"

"Just the usual. Rolling in garbage and my car blew up. But you already knew about that."

"What about friends and family?"

Stephanie thought back. "The usual there, too. Mom and Joe hounding me to quit my job. They said I needed to grow up and marry Joe. I needed to take care of him and have children. Same old same old."

"Did Joe propose to you again?" Bobby was writing, but his eyes never left hers. One day, she was going to ask him how he did that.

"Yeah. In Pino's."

"How did you respond to that?"

Stephanie sighed. "I told him no. I don't want to get married right now."

"How did he take it?"

Her vision started to blur. "Like he takes everything else that has to do with me. He yelled, he made hand gestures, he called me incompetent."

"How did that make you feel?"

"Embarrassed. Stupid. The usual."

"Why were you embarrassed about it?" Bobby stopped writing and watched her intently.

"Why do you think, Bobby?" Stephanie looked at the other man in exasperation. "He took a private matter and aired it out to the entire world. My mother found out about it before I even got out of the building! Every Goddamn thing that happens in my life ends up on everybody's gossip list. I can't go to the bathroom without someone calling my mother to tell her about it! My so-called friends are making bets about my life everywhere I go. Whenever I roll in garbage or my car blows up, somebody wins the pot for the day. How the hell would that make you feel?"

"It would piss me off," Bobby answered, his face serious. "Usually, it makes you blow up, too. Why didn't you blow up this time?"

"How the fuck should I know?" Stephanie cried, pulling her knees up to her chest.. "Maybe I just realized that blowing up didn't help the matter. No matter what I do, I'm going to get the same fucking reaction out of everybody. Why waste the energy blowing up anymore? It's a waste of time." Tears were falling freely down her face. She buried her face in her knees so Ranger and Bobby couldn't see them.

"Can I ask you a few questions, Steph?" Bobby asked. She nodded silently, reaching up to wipe her tears away.

"How often do you feel worthless or hopeless?"

She sniffled. "All the time."

"How have you been sleeping lately?"

Stephanie glanced over at Ranger. "At first, I had trouble falling asleep. When I finally would, I would wake up a few hours later. When Ranger brought me here, though, I slept for over two days."

Bobby wrote something on the paper before speaking again. "How's your appetite been?"

Stephanie sighed, not understanding why she had to state the obvious. She was getting really self-conscious by his questions. "I don't have one anymore. There's no point in eating if nothing tastes good."

"Have you been avoiding friends and family lately?"

Another obvious question. "Yes."

"Why?"

Stephanie blinked. "Because I don't feel like dealing with anybody. Why bother if they're only going to criticize me?"

Bobby looked up and met her eyes. "Why do you think everybody would do that?"

"Because that's what they always do," Stephanie began to cry harder at the memory of the police station. The jokes, the sneers, the bets. God, she was humiliated just thinking about it. It was always the same. Why deal with it when she could just hide out in her apartment? She was so caught up in the memories that she didn't notice her tears dripping down her face and onto her jeans.

"Have you had any difficulties with concentration?"

Stephanie held back another sob, swallowing hard. "Yes."

"Can you describe any instances?"

She leaned over, laying her head against the arm of the couch. She was starting to get a headache. "I can't concentrate when I'm working. I get headaches and body aches and all I can think about is that I'd rather be home in bed. I can't screw anything up if I'm home in bed."

Bobby wrote on the paper again. Without looking up, he continued with the questions. "Have you ever attempted suicide?"

Stephanie jerked upright, her eyes wide. Looking over at Ranger, she could only see his blank face. No, he wouldn't tell Bobby about the other night. Would he?

"Stephanie," Bobby repeated, bringing her out of her daze. "Have you ever attempted suicide?"

More tears spilled over and she tried to blink fast, willing them away. She didn't want to talk anymore.

Standing up, she took a deep breath. "I'm tired. I don't want to talk anymore."

Ranger looked like he was going to stand up, but Bobby gave a slight shake of his head. He sat back in the chair, his body tense.

"Why are you having such a hard time answering the question, Stephanie?" Bobby asked quietly, his eyes never leaving her face. "Yes or no. Have you ever attempted suicide?"

Stephanie was humiliated. Why the hell was he asking her that? It wasn't any of his damn business. "I'm done talking. I'm going to bed."

Without a backwards glance, she turned her back and headed for the stairs. The men watched as she disappeared. A minute later, they heard the sound of a door closing.

Bobby looked down at his notes while Ranger stood up, walking toward the stairs. He stopped and looked up, desperate to follow Stephanie and comfort her.

"What do I do, Bobby?" He asked, wishing he knew the answer himself.

"From her answers, I'd say she's suffering from clinical depression," Bobby sighed and finally looked up from the paper. "I don't think she's going to be comfortable talking to me. She's embarrassed and she thinks that we'll be mad at her for everything. I'm equipped to get her only so far, but I think she is beyond what I can do for her on my own."

"So what the hell do we do?" Ranger hissed. He didn't only want to know what was wrong. He wanted to know how the hell to cure her and bring her back. He was a man used to taking action. He would find a problem and set out to fix it right then and there. He found this problem and he wanted to fix it, for all of them.

"Ask her tomorrow if she'd be willing to see a psychologist. Let her know that he'll come to the house to see her." Bobby stood up, papers in hand. "If she agrees, give these to him. He'll take it from there." He set the papers down on the table and straightened up. "Ranger, I don't know how serious she was with the gun, but if she gets worse, it might be best if she were in the hospital. They can keep her from hurting herself."

Ranger shook his head vehemently. "I can look after her. I can keep her from hurting herself."

"You're not a professional, Ranger."

"Fuck that," Ranger spat, his eyes flashing. "I'm not going to lock her up in some fucking hospital where they'll keep her drugged out of her mind. I'd die first."

Bobby sighed. He didn't want that, either, but it was more important to keep Stephanie safe and alive. "It's not going to be easy. You'll have to keep an eye on her at all times. Keep an eye on her behavior and keep her away from anything that could be used as a weapon. Empty out all the medicine cabinets and get rid of your razor and blades."

"She said she didn't think she would go through with it," Ranger said quietly, his eyes still on the stairs. "She said she just wanted to know it was something she could control."

"It doesn't matter, Ranger. She was thinking about it and that's enough to take precautions."

Ranger was torn. On the one hand, he would do anything to make sure she didn't hurt herself. On the other hand, if she felt like a prisoner in his home, she wouldn't trust him to help her. And he didn't want Stephanie to face this alone.

Running a hand through his hair, he sighed. "I'll take care of her. I won't have her locked up like a criminal."

Bobby nodded, writing something down on the notes he had taken. "I wrote down the doctor's name and number. Tell him I sent you and he'll make a house call."

Ranger showed Bobby out and locked the door behind him. He shut off all the lights on the way upstairs, pausing outside the bedroom door.

Taking a deep breath, he reached out and grasped the doorknob. He prayed that Stephanie would talk to him. He didn't think he could handle her silence again.

The room was dark. Letting his eyes adjust, he saw that Stephanie was already in bed, curled up in fetal position under the covers. From the sound of her breathing, though, he knew that she was wide awake.

"Babe?" He said softly, closing the door behind him. When she didn't answer, he walked across the room and sat down beside her on the bed. He reached out and touched her soft, curly hair, savoring the texture and feel of it against his skin.

"Are you sending me to a padded room?" Stephanie asked softly. He could detect the anxiety in her voice.

"No. You're staying here with me."

"So did you figure out what's wrong with me?"

"Bobby says it's clinical depression."

"Can he fix it?"

Ranger paused. "He left me the name and number of a psychologist here in Point Pleasant. It's up to you if you want to talk to him."

Stephanie didn't answer him. She had no idea what she wanted to do. She had freaked out talking to Bobby. She didn't want to piss of a complete stranger.

Ranger stood up and stripped down to his boxers. Pulling back the covers, he slipped in behind her, pulling her into his chest. He needed to comfort himself with her presence. He needed to know that she was safe with him. He promised himself that she would be herself again. She had to be.

Stephanie straightened her body out and melted against him. No matter how bad she felt, being this close to Ranger always made her feel safe. And comfortable.

She fell asleep almost immediately.

Ranger held her close, breathing in her sweet scent. He listened to the sound of her breathing and knew the second she fell asleep.

Her question and answer session with Bobby had shaken him to the core. What he had loved most about Stephanie was her spirit, and that included blowing up at people who pissed her off. Hearing her say that it wasn't worth it anymore, that she didn't have the energy left to fight, made him physically ill. Her attitude was a huge part of her, a part that he had admired since the day he met her. With that gone, he knew that a huge piece of his Babe was missing. And hearing that all this started right after he left…Christ. She had never had this reaction before when he was "in the wind". He couldn't for the life of him figure out what was so different about this time. He had first thought that something had physically happened to her. Maybe she had been beaten or God forbid, assaulted in some way. Thankfully, that hadn't seemed to happen. But it made it all the more confusing.

Morelli had proposed to Stephanie before and she never had this kind of reaction. Her mother had been treating her like shit since birth, and Stephanie had always managed to roll her eyes and ignore it. She was the Queen of Denial. Never before had she looked at a gun as something to use on herself. Hell, she was afraid of the damn things.

Why now?

Ranger lifted his head off the pillow and looked down at the woman sleeping in his arms. The desire to help her was overwhelming. He was frustrated that he couldn't do that. He had always managed to be her hero. When the problem was physical, he had been able to deal with it. He was lousy with emotions and emotional problems were out of his realm.

Settling back against the pillows, he held Stephanie and let the worry wash over him.

For the first time in years, Ranger felt helpless.

Special thanks to Alfonsina del Mar for all the help. Thank you all for the great reviews. Please let me know what you think.