Chapter 4

Jess barely looked up when the diner door slammed. He figured it was Luke getting back from the town meeting that Jess himself had only avoided by offering to clean the coffee machine and refill all the condiments. He got a real surprise when he suddenly found Paris staring him down.

"You didn't call."

She was snapping at him before he even had a chance to ask what was up, and Jess didn't appreciate that.

"Hey there, Paris, how are you doing tonight?" he asked, as if she never said a word.

"You said you were going to call and then you didn't do it, she told him again, slower this time, as if maybe she thought he was deficient.

"You gonna make a point any time soon?" asked Jess, pausing mid-wipe of the counter to stare at her. "You do remember the part where I'm not really your boyfriend, right?"

For a moment he almost thought that remark stung her, even though they both knew it was perfectly true. It was just a split second when she looked weird and then right back to business. Jess decided he imagined it and moved on.

"I'm not the idiot in this situation," said Paris crossly, folding her arms over her chest. "Your calling me was to set up our next date, the next part of this plan in which you and I are supposed to be in a relationship. If I can't tell Rory how you called me or invited me to dinner or whatever, then I can't hold up my end of the agreement."

"You can't make it up as you're going along?" asked Jess, rolling his eyes as he got back to his work.

"Not if our stories are going to match up. This whole thing falls apart if we don't communicate."

Jess winced at that, glad that he had his back to Paris so she didn't see it. That sounded way too much like something a real girlfriend would say, but unfortunately, he knew she had a point. If they said differing things in front of Rory, she was smart enough to figure out something was going on. That was the last thing they needed when the start of this plan had gone so well.

"Things have been kinda weird here the last couple of days," Jess admitted, tidying away the ketchup bottles and salt shakers that had previously stood between them on the counter. "Luke's uncle died, so he's been stressing over funeral arrangements and stuff."

"Oh. My condolences," said Paris stiffly, clearly unsure how to behave when her fake boyfriend's great uncle had died.

Jess had to admit, he wasn't clear on the protocol either.

"Whatever," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "Far as I know I never met the guy. I'm not even sure Luke is sad about it so much as pissed that he's the only one around to deal with everything."

"Can't be easy for him," said Paris, nodding her head. "Well, now I'm here, I guess we could figure out our next move."

"Yeah, well, better think fast," Jess told her, looking beyond her out of the window. "Incoming."

Paris guessed what he meant and yet still felt the need to turn and see for sure. Rory and Lorelai were headed their way with Luke. It was lights, camera, action, and Paris had no script to go with this time. Thinking fast, just as Jess had advised, she grabbed his hand from the counter and held on tight, saying the first seemingly appropriate words that came to mind, just as the door opened.

"Are you sure you're okay? I mean, I never lost a family member like this, but it must be tough for you."

"Like I said, I didn't really know the guy," Jess replied, "but I appreciate the concern," he told her with a smile that made something shift inside of Paris.

She refused to wonder too much on why that was.

"Paris, hi," said Lorelai, complete with a little wave. "I guess you came over to check on our guys here in their time of need?" she said, patting Luke on the shoulder as he moved by her to the counter.

"Just offering any support that I can." Paris smiled. "What else can a girlfriend do? Hey, Rory," she greeted her friend then.

"Hey," she replied, making a point of not looking directly at Paris or Jess right now, and yet staring terribly when she finally realised they were holding hands. "Um, Luke, you really shouldn't go to any trouble when you're already so busy..."

Her butt was barely on the stool and yet she was already trying to get away. Lorelai's hand on her arm stopped her.

"Hey, not to be unfeeling here, but we earned the promised coffee and pie today, and I have a feeling we'll be earning it again tomorrow," she said definitely. "Besides, what kind of friends would we be to leave Luke and Jess alone when they're having such a rough time?"

Rory clearly didn't have an answer to that and stayed on her stool. Paris tried not to smile too triumphantly, instead focusing her attention on Jess. The look he gave her was encouraging and disappointing at the same time. He was proud of the move she made when they had company coming, and yet at the same time she knew he was only glad because they had made Rory jealous. Paris hadn't known conflicting feelings like this before. Maybe she was an idiot for ever starting this whole thing, but for now she was going to go with it. They made a deal, she had to stick to it. What kind of person would it make her to back out now?

"Well, as much as I want to be as supportive as possible, I really do have to go," she said regretfully. "Homework waits for no woman. You know how it is," she said pointedly to Rory.

"Yeah, sure. Lots of studying to do," her friend muttered in reply.

"Thanks for coming over" said Jess, gripping her hand tighter when Paris moved to pull it away.

Next thing she knew he was raising it to his lips and kissing her knuckles. The weird smile that came to Paris' face then was completely beyond her control, and certainly she couldn't speak after that. She just waited until she got her hand back and beat a hasty retreat.

Jess watched her go. He made a point of it actually, just staring until she was gone from his sight. It was oddly easy to do, because his mind was occupied by her behaviour tonight. She came over here all indignant that he hadn't called, like she was genuinely hurt or annoyed by that. Maybe it had bothered her, because of their plan. There couldn't be another reason, not really. Unless there was. Jess decided not to think about some potential crush Paris had on him. That might make this whole thing just a little too twisted.

"Jess?" Lorelai tried again when she didn't get a response the first time.

"What?" he asked, meeting her curious gaze.

"I was just saying, seems like things with you and Paris are going pretty good."

"Yeah. Pretty good," he told her, nodding his head. "I'm done here, Luke," he said to his uncle then, tapping his hand on the counter twice before heading for the curtain and disappearing from sight.

"Thanks, Jess!" Luke called behind him, unsure if he heard. "Y'know, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually think dating Paris might be good for him."

From behind the curtain, Jess smirked hard and waited to hear the response to that. Rory's snort was more amusing than it should've been, making his smirk turn into a real smile.

"I'm sorry," she said, presumably off some surprised look from her mother, Luke, or both. "I just can't see how this thing with Paris and Jess is going to work. She's so into school and studying, she's beyond straight-laced, and Jess is... well, he's smart, but he's not exactly the studious type."

"Opposites attract, babe," Lorelai told her easily. "I mean, look at you and Dean. No offence to the guy, he's great, but he's not Chilton material like you. He's all into his sports and everything, and you and I both know us Gilmore girls are completely unaware about all things football, hockey, basketball... pretty much anything that requires psychical activity."

There was a long pause before anyone spoke again. It was Rory, but she didn't have an answer to her mother's excellent point so she switched subjects to ask Luke more about Uncle Louie. Jess took that as his cue to creep on up the stairs before anyone noticed he was listening in.

Settling down with a book, he read for a while, keeping an eye on the time. After a half hour or so, he reached for the phone and dialled Paris' number.

"Now you call?" she said the moment she picked up.

"I'd've called sooner but I figured crashing your car on the highway wasn't a part of the plan," he told her smartly. "So, you did good tonight."

"I am aware," Paris told him. "If Gilmore got any greener I'd say she should host The Muppet Show."

Jess smiled at the joke, he couldn't help it.

"Yeah, well, we're going to have to up our game if she's going to buy that we're really falling for each other," he told her, keeping his voice low since he had no idea when Luke might walk in. "Apparently she doesn't understand why we even get along."

"I could say the same the same thing about her and Forester," said Paris, with an eye-roll Jess was certain he heard somehow. "At least you and I are of the same species. I swear if he didn't have that pretty boy thing going on, Dean would pass for Cro-Magnon. How she stands to hold a conversation with someone like that, I have no idea."

"Maybe that's our next move," said Jess thoughtfully. "How'd you feel about going on your first double date, Paris?"

The long silence that followed told Jess he had surprised her. That didn't bother him much, just so long as after some consideration she decided it was a good idea.

"It has potential," she conceded then. "I mean, a direct comparison between the intelligence of you and Forester is going to show you off to greatest effect. You really think they'd go for it?"

"Are you kidding me?" Jess laughed then. "Forester was almost doing back-flips when he heard I was dating you. He's thrilled to think he has no competition for Rory anymore."

"He should realise that if he has to try this hard to keep her, then she can't really love him like he believes. Dumbass."

Jess continued to plot out the next date, the one that was planned as a double, but Paris was only hearing every other sentence. She was such a fraud. Here she was calling Dean a dumbass for trying so hard to keep Rory when her interest was clearly piqued by Jess. Paris was doing something similar, trying to find a way to get close to Jess for just as long as she could before he ended up with his intended. She was a fool, and she knew it. Yet when Jess asked if they were on for the double date she dumbly agreed, even going so far as to suggest that she be the one to pitch the idea to Rory in school tomorrow.

When the call was over, Paris let her head drop onto her desk with a thud.

"You're an idiot, Gellar," she told herself crossly. "But hey, at least you're an idiot who's going on another date with Jess Mariano."