Zack fumbled around his pocket for the keycard he knew was there with his iPhone, but cursed as his fingers just kept finding the phone. His heart was hammering in his chest as he stared desperately at the door in front of him. Any second now Will would come after him and Zack wanted to avoid that at all cost. Finally, a thin square slipped between his fingers and he retrieved it, hastily forcing it inside the slot in the lock. He heard the click of the door and he was able to go through just as he heard Will scramble to open his own a few metres away.

"Zack! Wait!"

But Zack was already inside the dark room, the door shut and locked. He felt like he had just run a mile. He fell back against the door, trying to keep his breathing under control. Will was probably right outside. Zack listened intently for any noise that might prove his theory but there was no sound except for his twin's rhythmic breathing coming from their bedroom. In the silence there was no way to get away from the very recent memories in his mind. Zack slowly sank to the floor, his knees drawn tight up against his body. He leaned his forehead on them in an attempt to still his mind that just wouldn't stop spinning.

They had kissed.

He couldn't believe it. How the hell had it happened? One minute they were just relaxing and talking and the next Will's warm lips were covering his own. Zack had known it was coming about two seconds before but he hadn't been able to pull away. Something had been keeping him still and waiting for the inevitable. He shouldn't have liked it. He should have stopped it right away. He most definitely shouldn't have kissed Will back. The image wouldn't leave his retinas, the one of Will's face coming closer and the accompanying sensation of another guy's mouth on his.

The kiss had meant something, Zack just couldn't figure out what. His brain was nearly exploding with the recent memory and he could barely make sense of it, much less figure out the meaning behind it. All he knew was that he and Will had kissed for a few peaceful moments and then he had felt a warm hand slide around his back. His naked back. And that was all it had taken for Zack's eyes to spring open, even though he wasn't quite sure when had they even fallen closed, and for him to pull away, scrambling off the bed and out of the room; Will calling his name behind him.

It had been too much too soon and some logical part of his brain had managed to steal away the reins from whatever was steering the irrational part of him. That feeling that had come over him just now was something unlike anything he had ever experienced. It was panicked, terrified, and he just couldn't understand where it had come from. It had been a kiss, not the the end of the world. Except, the kiss meant betrayal. Sure he had kissed many, many girls in the past but never a guy. He had let Cody down, he had broken some invisible bond that had always been between them. The bond that Cody probably didn't even feel was there.

Zack took a deep, steady breath and lifted his head slowly. It felt like he was back at sea, with the waves sinking and falling in his mind but at least the rave party had faded from his head. He sat there against the door for a few minutes until he felt a bit better, then made his way half-crawling in the darkness to their bedroom and to Cody's sleeping form. His twin was lying on his side with one arm tucked under his pillow and the other hanging off the bed. Zack stared at his face for what seemed like a long time. There was a sliver of light coming from the window that cast a pale tendril across Cody's face, illuminating the features that always looked so innocent in sleep. Slowly, Zack stretched out his arm and gingerly took hold of his brother's hand. It was smooth and warm and familiar and it made Zack's uneven breath come out a little easier. "I'm sorry," he whispered, but almost no sound came out. He was choking up but forced himself to go on. "I never wanted to let you down. I'm so sorry. I love you so much." Cody didn't stir. He just looked peaceful and perfect. Zack leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on the back of Cody's hand. Then he let go and without hesitation scurried between the sheets next to his brother. He couldn't deal with the actions that had happened tonight, all he needed was to be closed to Cody because it was the only thing that could make him forget everything else. Cody made everything else disappear.

Zack moved as close as he could without actually touching and he found himself relaxing at the faint whiff coming from Cody of soap and his own scent mixed into a comforting concoction. Maybe in the morning everything would have turned out to be a bad dream and everything would back be normal again.

Zack could only hope.

xXx

It was three minutes past eight the next morning when Zack finally gave up on his attempt to fall asleep. He had slept for about two hours before he had woken, curled up against Cody's back and holding him tightly. Zack had let go immediately, feeling terribly guilty that he wasn't able to control himself. He only hoped Cody hadn't realised, being in his bed was one thing he could explain but body contact would be a different matter.

The rain that had slashed down outside throughout the previous day had gone but rushing winds had taken its place. The window glass cracked as particularly vicious torrents of air came at it and despite it being warm in the room and even nicer between the sheets, Zack found himself shivering at the sound.

He felt exhausted though as he got out of bed and padded to the bathroom, frowning as he caught sight of his reflection in the mirror. Dark, bruise-like shadows played under his eyes and his milky skin seemed particularly translucent this morning. It looked as though his body lacked quite a few necessary vitamins. Zack figured his washed-out appearance wasn't only due to his lack of sleep. His life had been stressful ever since they'd come back from sea but the word stress had taken on a whole new meaning in the past few days.

A fiery hot shower raised his spirits somewhat but did nothing for his exhaustion or dull his mind to the thoughts of the night before. Will was constantly there in his mind, as was Cody, and Zack was not sure he could keep them there in that capacity for that much longer. He couldn't believe how he had gotten himself into this mess. He loved his twin so much but had gone and kissed some other guy. How could he had done that to Cody? He wasn't that kind of guy anymore, his player days were over.

Zack stared at his own face in the mirror, his blond hair slightly darkened by the water and dripping down his nose. Cody wasn't actually his though, he had to remind himself. Never was and never would be.

He couldn't bear to see more of his face so he tore his eyes away from the mirror and left the bathroom. Cody still hadn't moved from the position which Zack's body had been wrapped around and he found himself slowing his steps toward his own bed across the room and just watched his brother. During that instant between sleep and consciousness he had been aware of how his twin's body felt against his own. Cody's skin, so warm and smooth and pristine, combined with his intoxicating scent had made every fibre in Zack's body want the moment to last forever.

He shook out of his thoughts and went to get dressed before he woke Cody up. Once dressed he headed back over to his brother. He didn't touch him this time, just used his voice to lure his brother from sleep. The moment was so alike every other day but this time yesterday, the complication of Will had not existed and Zack couldn't get the latter quite all the way out of his mind as he saw Cody's eyes blink up at him blearily.

"What?"

"Come grab some breakfast downstairs, I'll pay" Zack said.

Cody closed his eyes and let out a low whine. "What have you broken?"

"Nothing I'm just hungry and don't fancy eating alone, Codes. Please." The plea in Zack's voice was real but his actual words weren't. He needed to get out of this room because just a few metres away, through walls that probably weren't very thick at all, was Will and just the thought of him made Zack feel terribly uncomfortable.

Cody groaned into the pillow. "Fine," came the muffled reply. "But I'm going back to bed afterwards."

"Yeah, okay."

They left only a few minutes later. Cody was following Zack out of the room like a modern-day zombie. Zack peeked into the corridor, it was empty and quiet, but he still walked briskly toward the lift and passed Will's door while pretending it wasn't there.

"Should we ask if Will wants to come?" Cody asked, but Zack quickly shook his head.

"He finished late last night I bet he just wants to sleep"

"I want to sleep, I was there too you know" Cody pointed out as he jabbed his thumb against the button for the lift.

"Okay," Zack mumbled, purposefully letting his expression fall a little. "I guess I could eat alone."

Cody rolled his eyes. "That won't work on me." But he still stayed, just like Zack knew he would.

"Thanks, Codes. I promise you can sleep later."

The lift arrived and they entered. Zack glanced nervously around as the doors started to close, all too aware of the movie moments when the least desirable person would slide their hand between them at the last moment, but no one interrupted the silvery doors this time. The restaurant was half-full, mostly with people wearing dark suits and somber expressions behind morning editions of news papers. Zack and Cody stuck out like sore thumbs in their shirts, jeans and trainers but not many people paid them any attention. Zack scanned the room for signs of Will upon entering but didn't spot him anywhere.

"Can you believe how different this hotel is now?" Cody looked around, a small frown appearing on his face.

"Yeah. Well things change" Zack looked at the selection of food they had. "People change"

Cody scanned the different cereal, frowning at the highly sugared ones. "What a selection."

"Just pick something," Zack mumbled, his eyes darting from Cody's profile in the morning light to the entrance they'd just come through. "Let's get a table." He grabbed a cooked breakfast and found an empty booth at the other end of the room. A wide mirror stretched alongside the wall and he took the seat opposite it so as to be able to watch out for any unwanted people looming about .Cody joined him a minute later, balancing a tray with eating utensils and the large bowl of fruit in his hands. "You can't just get the entire bowl," Zack protested.

"Well I'm not eating any of that! Think of your body breaking down all that sugar and. . ."

"Ok. Whatever." Zack sighed but Cody remained casually unperturbed. The image of Cody sitting there and smiling smugly to himself made Zack feel warm and happy inside. "You're the best brother ever," he said spontaneously.

Cody smiled at him. "Yes I am."

Just falling deeper, Zack thought to himself as he watched Cody tear into his breakfast. He glanced into the mirror behind Cody and saw a familiar figure just walking into the room. Will was glancing around as he walked and the expression on his face was serious. Worried. Zack froze like a deer in headlight. Any minute now Will would spot him. There was nowhere to hide. Zack's pounding heart could probably be heard from across the room.

Will glanced right, then left, and then found Zack's eyes reflected in the mirror. There was a moment where he seemed to teeter forward, almost as if he was going to walk towards him, but then something changed. Maybe he had noticed Cody, maybe the previous night's images had come to him. Maybe he didn't know what to say. Zack didn't either. He didn't even know how to move. Their eyes were connected for what seemed like hours, but then abruptly Will dropped his gaze, his eyes flickering around nervously and then he turned, shoving his fist into the pockets of the grey hoodie he was wearing. Zack watched him leave the restaurant and exit through the swinging hotel door, walking out into the freezing winds.

"Hello! Planet Cody to Zack! Come in Zack!"

Zack blinked and focused his eyes on Cody who was waving a hand in his face. "What?" he said irritably, pushing away his breakfast as he had suddenly lost his appetite.

"I was talking to you and you zoned out. I should feel insulted."

"Do you?"

"No." Cody smiled happily. "I'm just wondering what you were thinking about."

Zack took a sip of water. "Nothing really."

"Bet I can guess."

Bet you can't. "It's nothing Codes, I suppose I'm just a little tired. I think I'll go to sleep as well."

Cody looked at him and it was one of those stares that made Zack uncomfortable every single time because he found it too penetrating, like his thoughts weren't safe.

"All right," Cody said slowly, still eyeing Zack curiously. "If you say so."

xXx

Zack was distracted all the way back to their room. He kept thinking about Will and his expression and the way he had left. Will had opened his mouth a little, just like he had wanted to say something but changed his mind. Zack wondered what words would have come out. He felt an odd confusion curling in the pit of his stomach and it was made worse every time he looked at Cody. Double the confusion. Zack was pretty sure he was going mad.

"You look tired," Cody noted when they were inside.

"I am," Zack sighed. "Maybe this new job is getting to me." He shrugged out of his jacket and unbuttoned his shirt, flinging it on the back of a chair.

"You just need some love and attention and you'll be as good as new."

Zack glanced at his twin but Cody wasn't looking his way. Love and attention. Yeah, that would work. "Do you know where I can get some of that?"

Cody smiled as he kicked off his shoes and stripped out of the jacket he was wearing. "Yes. Right here." He pointed at himself.

Zack smiled faintly. "Can I request an Cody-hug?"

"Granted," Cody said as he walked the space separating them and wrapped his arms around Zack's shoulders.

"No."

"No?" Cody looked confused as he pulled back enough to see Zack's face.

"That's how you hug Woody," Zack noted. "I'm your brother."

Cody's face softened back into a smile. "Okay, I'll make it special for you." He went for it again, sliding his arms around Zack's neck in an intimate embrace as he pulled him close, their bodies pressing together tightly. This was definitely not the way Cody hugged Woody.

Zack felt his eyes close automatically and he surreptitiously inhaled the sweet scent coming off the crook of Cody's neck. This was it, this was perfect. Cody's body was so warm and soft and comforting and Zack was pretty sure he would be able to fall asleep standing up, as long as he had those arms around him.

"Better?" Cody asked softly, his breath caressing Zack's ear.

"Yeah," Zack mumbled. "Much better." Cody's face was so close and Zack was hyper aware of the distance of his lips. If he just angled his head a little bit, he'd be able to feel them. Would they taste like the fruit he'd just had? Or something else?

"Let's sleep now." That was that. Zack's thoughts were interrupted when he felt the weight of his twin's arms leave his shoulders and were left cold and bare. He watched Cody bound to his bed and slide under the covers and Zack followed suit slumping into his own bed.

"Zack?"

"Mmm?"

"Grab your sheets and come over here" Zack's jerked up at Cody's demand. "It's freezing!"

Zack obliged desperate for more contact. He felt a deep and sudden need for it now as he yanked the sheets off his bed and made his way over to his twins. He dived into the other bed feeling around for Cody. He rested his head just behind Cody's, leaving just a thin sliver of air between them. Zack could still smell him like this.

"Mmm," Cody sighed. "This is nice, much warmer."

Zack smiled where he lay. Happiness. That's what this was to him. Happiness and love. And underlying feelings of lust, but Zack pretended they didn't exist. He was too tired and too content to think about the whole picture at the moment and even though he knew they shouldn't sleep like this, that this was no way of overcoming his love for Cody, maybe just this once he would let himself feel at peace.