Chapter 4: My First Friend!
That night, Gamzee sat cross-legged in his bed with Tavros' notebook. He stared at it blankly for a minute, thinking about his conversation with Mrs. Nitram before he left.
"I can't hold up the lawsuit."
"Why?" Gamzee asked. Mrs. Nitram sighed wearily.
"I don't have time, Gamzee. You know I want to see that son of a bitch get what he deserves but with work and Tavros I don't have time to meet with lawyers and stuff. Maybe once Tavros is out of the hospital." Gamzee nodded, but was upset. It wasn't fair. Some motherfucker will probably get to walk away from this? He knew that it wasn't necessarily their fault. Tavros had lost control of his wheelchair going down a particularly steep hill and it had veered out in the street. But if that motherfucker hadn't been going highway speed in a little suburban neighborhood he would have had all the time in the world to break for Tavros instead of hitting him with his truck!
They said it was a miracle that Tavros was alive. It didn't seem like much of a motherfucking miracle to Gamzee. With Tavros stuck in his bed, his bones snapped like toothpicks. What kind of miracle was that? Gamzee sighed.
Gamzee's older brother, Karkat, peered in. "You okay?"
"Fine," Gamzee said, his voice a bit more toxic then he meant it to be. "Just…," he trailed off. Karkat sighed sympathetically, then closed the door again. Gamzee turned his attention back to the notebook in his lap. He opened it up the the page he'd folded in at the hospital.
I told Mom how that boy we met last night started going to my school.
"Oh! The kind of odd one that got his coat stolen!"
"Yeah," I said. "I think we're going to be friends!" Friends was not a word I really said. Me telling my mom about my "friends" was like me using the other "F-word" around my mom. It just didn't happen. I had a few friends online but I didn't even know their real names so they didn't really count. She smiled.
"That's good. Is he nice?" I nodded. "Well you'll have to introduce me sometime."
It's kinda embarrassing, but I couldn't shut up about you, Gamzee! I told my mom just about everything that happened all day.
Gamzee smiled slightly to himself. The difference between Tavros' words and Tavros' thoughts was so slim that he could easily imagine Tavros saying everything that was written in the book. There was a space, as though Tavros was starting a new chapter.
So we kept eating lunch together and going to class. I told you about how my dad had died of cancer. You were so nice. I told you about it and got all stuttery and I had to stop explaining it after a while. You reached over and gave me this big, choking hug. "I'm sorry 'bout that, Tavbro," you said, squeezing me like a stuffed animal. It made me blush. I started realizing that I had a crush on you, but I couldn't even admit that to myself yet, let alone you! I couldn't hug you back because I was so surprised.
"Th-thanks," was all I could choke out. You smiled.
"My dad was a motherfucking bad guy. It's not fair that good people die and people like my dad just get to keep going. My mom was the same way. That's why I'm in the boys home now. When my bro, Karkat gets outta high school this year he's gonna get us a real apartment and all that shit but for now I live with a bunch of other boys."
"Aw, I'm s-sorry," I said after some hesitation. You smiled.
"I'm not! Cause I met some really cool motherfuckers here. Well I met one really cool motherfucker, anyway." You grinned at me. I went and got all tongue-tied and embarrassed again. Then I thought it was just because I didn't know how to talk to people but I should have known I liked you all along! Good thing you knew my feelings better than me! Ha ha! }:x
The notebook gave Gamzee a strange feeling. It made him feel like Tavros couldn't die. This boy, shown by the words on the pages. He was so alive. The Tavros that was talking to him through the ink soaked pages was so energetic. Normal Tavros. How could he be dying? He couldn't be. The feeling was like a high. And Gamzee sure knew how highs ended. They got you in trouble and they got you on medication that made you see what the hell was really going on the in the world.
One day, I think about a week and a half after you came to my school you were sitting at lunch with me like always. You looked pretty bored. "Hey, Tav, wanna hang out after school?" A big brick wall of thoughts hit me! I'd never been asked to hang out after school. I nodded.
"Well… lemme ask my mom," I said. I took out my phone. "W-what… I… what do you want to do?"
"Whatever," you said cheerily. "Go for a walk or get a snack or whatever!" I grinned.
"Oh! Alright." Mom asked a million questions and after I promised to update her where we were she said I could go. I was pretty excited.
So after school we were walking in the park. Well, you were walking. You insisted that you didn't mind pushing me so I let you. I ended up yawning after a minute.
"Damn, Tav," you said. "When you yawn like that you're as cute as a little teddy bear or something! Makes me wanna give you a big squeeze or something," you giggle. My face went red.
"I… I…," I gurgled. But you kept pushing me like nothing had happened.
"Maybe going to the park in December wasn't such a hot idea," you laughed. "Let's go grab something to eat. I'll pay!"
"N-no! I can pay for myself!" I said instantly.
"No way, Tav. Let me be a motherfucking gentleman today." I muttered submissively and you laughed again, and ruffled my hair with one hand as you continued to push me with the other. I didn't realize how unique it was that we bonded so quick. It was practically love at first sight, huh?
"Love at first sight," Gamzee breathed. He sighed shakily. "I know I'm a motherfucking piece of shit," he said under his breath in a hasty prayer. "And I know I did some nasty shit as a kid. But I'm better now. I take my meds, and I help little old ladies cross streets." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "And you can up and punish me and I wouldn't even be upset," his voice cracked. "But not Tavros. That's not fair, man. That's not motherfucking fair to Tavros. Or… or Mrs. Nitram. Or all the people I know he's gonna help. So please if anyone up there is even motherfucking listening to a shithead like me anymore… please let Tavros have just one more miracle."
This story makes me sad to write ;-;
I made Gamzee and Karkat brothers *shrug* :o) I think they make good bros. Thanks for reading and reviewing and favoriting and following and all that good stuff