BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES

CHAPTER 4 - BREAKING OUT OF BLACKGATE

"What is this?" a Blackgate guard pulled a knife from the Riddler's back pocket and showed it to him.

"Oops," the Riddler embarrassingly smiled, "Forgot about that one."

The Riddler was at Blackgate Penitentiary. But, he wasn't arrested. He was there for a visit. Upon stepping into the prison, he had triggered every alarm with hidden weapons all over his person. Finally, though, they were all taken.

"Now that you're done stealing my stuff," the Riddler straigtened his question mark tie, "I'd like to go visit my friend."

The guard nodded, motioning another guard over. He said, "I'll take you to the visitor's section."

"Thank you," Riddler smiled at him, shooting a glare back at the guard who had confiscated his weapons.

"Crane!" a voice yelled from down the hall. "You have a visitor!"

Jonathon Crane rose up off of his cot, having been reading a book, and looked oddly in the direction of the yell. He wondered, who in the world would be here to visit me? Crane closed his book and hopped off his bed as guards came and escorted him to a visitor's area. In here, many people were visiting, most of them families, it appeared. But there, sitting at a table was the last person that Crane expected.

"Nigma?" Crane was shocked as the guards sat him down and walked away.

"How are you, Dr. Crane?" the Riddler smiled, taking his hat off, setting it on the table.

"What do you want?" Crane didn't like wasting time.

"Why were you arrested, my friend?" Riddler asked.

"I will not explain myself to you, Nigma," Crane got up to walk away.

"But, Dr. Crane, I need your help," Riddler frowned. Crane stopped and turned back to him. Slowly, Crane got back in his seat, tempted to hear the offer. Riddle smiled and said, "I apparently have a way with words. I've changed a lot of minds lately." Riddler then got back to business. He said to Crane, "Okay, listen Scarecrow, we need your help."

"We?" Crane asked.

"Harley Quinn and I," the Riddler answered.

"Harley Qui - "

"Yes, Harley Quinn," the Riddler glared, wanting to finish what he was saying. "I have a plan."

"We've established that, Nigma," Crane crossed his arms, also wanting Riddler to finish what he was saying. "Out with it, already!"

"We need your toxin so Harley Quinn can get into Arkham Asylum," Riddler whispered, only loud enough for Crane to hear. "Harley used to work there, so she should have the security codes, somewhere back in her thick head."

"I used to work there too, you know," Crane said.

"Oh, I know," Riddler nodded. "Trust me . . . Harley was not my first choice. You were. But, I looked in to it while I was away and it appears that Scarecrow caused a lot of damage to the computer systems a while back. Had to reset everything in Arkham. But, Harley's worked there since then, so she should know."

"In theory," Crane nodded. "What are you doing once we get into Arkham?"

"I'm trying to solve that unsolvable riddle, as usual," Riddler shrugged. "We need to get Batman to come to us. So, we break into Arkham, bust out someone he'd follow, and set a trap."

"And who are you busting out?"

"Think about it," Riddler grinned. "What pair are absolutely purrr-fect, Dr. Crane?"

"You think Batman will go after her?"

"I know he will," the Riddler said something with a serious tone for the first time all day.

The guards then returned. One grabbed Crane by the arm and drug him away violently while the other glared at Riddler and said, "Okay, visiting hours are over, time to go!"

"Already? Aww, darn," the Riddler shook his head, grabbing his hat, being escorted towards the exit. As they walked, the Riddler happily said, "Excuse me, good sir, when are the next visiting hours?"

The guard ignored him as he led him to the front entrance.

"Good sir," the Riddler repeated himself. "When are the next visiting hours?"

The guard ignored him, not wanting to chat with ex-villains.

"Sir," the Riddler said, a little more stern.

"The next visiting hours are Tuesday at two o'clock!" the guard snapped.

Riddler, offended, put his hat on and said as they stopped at the door, "What can you hold without ever touching?"

The guard stared blankly, trying to figure out the answer. He rubbed his head and shrugged embarrassingly, "Uh . . . I don't know."

"A conversation," the Riddler stuck up his chin. "Learn how to hold one." And with that, he left Blackgate.

That night, Dr. Crane lay awake in his cot, staring at the ceiling. Blackgate was no place for him. This was the place for common criminals, petty theives, the actual crazy people. Arkham Asylum was nothing compared to this. At least they respected you at Arkham.

Things had finally quietened down. The only thing heard was the snoring of the inmates . . . and a clanging noise.

Crane rose up, curious as to what the noise was. He walked to the bars of his cell to here a clang . . . clang . . . clang noise coming closer. He poked his head out and saw a guard slowly walking towards him, clanging his flashlight on every bar of every cell. Something particularlly odd about the guard was how obese he was. Plus, right behind the guard was another one, identical to him, just as fat. The second one was saying, "Bring out your dead. Bring out your dead." It was Tweedledum and Tweedledee. They had guard outfits on.

They stopped at Crane's cell. Tweedledum said, "Is there a problem, Mr. Crane?"

Crane was confused. Why would these two be here? He never even liked them. They were annoying. "Why are you here?" he asked.

Tweedledee continued to say, "Bring out your dead. Bring out your - ow!" Tweedledum smacked him on the top of the head with the flashlight.

"Enough!" Tweedledum glared at his cousin. He looked back to Crane. "Dr. Crane, you have a visitor."

"What are you talking about?" Crane gripped the bars tight, angry at their ignorance. Crane then noticed something at his feet. Water was coming into his cell. It was all over the floor of the prison. Wait... it wasn't water. It was gasoline. He could smell it now.

Tweedledum opened the cell door and he and his cousin led Crane out and up some stairs to an upper level. Crane was surprised to see Riddler leaning up against a rail, looking down at the gasoline-soaked first floor.

"Riddle me this, Crane," Riddler grinned, reaching into his pocket. "How do you start a fire with only one stick?" Crane didn't answer, he just waited and watched. The Riddler pulled out a small box from his pocket and said, "Use a match." He struck a match and threw it down onto the first floor. The room ignited in flame, the inmates burning to a crisp.

Alarms went off, sprinklers were activated. The four villains made their way to a stairwell and began walking down the stairs. Crane said, "Riddler, what's going on? Why did - "

"I said I needed your help, didn't I?" the Riddler said as they continued to walk. "So, I busted you out, friend. But, Arkham won't be such an easy place to break in to. My Tweed friends won't be enough for that."

Tweedledum glared at him, "Well, thanks a lot, Riddler."

"Be quiet," the Riddler ordered.

The four got to the bottom of the stairs and walked out a door to be outside where the Riddler's limo rested. Crane said, "How did you all even manage to - "

"Let us worry about that, friend," the Riddler smiled as they walked towards the car.

A gunshot echoed. Riddler spun around to see a guard had followed them and shot Tweedledee in the shoulder. He was on the ground in pain, his cousin trying to help him. "Get in the car," Riddler said to Crane.

Crane got in the passenger side as the Riddler headed for the driver's side. He saw it was the same guard who had been rude to him earlier that day and yelled to the guard, "Mr. Guard-Man! What's the world's biggest crook?"

The guard fired a shot, shattering the back window of his car.

The Riddler answered his riddle. "Atlas! He held up the world!" Then, he got in the car and sped away.

The guard's backup arrived just in time. They arrested Tweedledum and Tweedledee as one guard called Commissioner Gordon. Once Gordon answered, he said, "Gordon, this is Paxton." he said, "Our alarm here in Blackgate were cut. We had a break-in."

"Break-in?" Gordon asked.

"Well, someone broke in to break someone out," the guard, Paxton, rubbed his head as he watched the Tweed cousins be taken back into the prison, struggling to get free.

"Who was it?" Gordon demanded to know.

"Sir, I think it was the Riddler. Well, I know it was the Riddler. He broke Scarecrow out."

"Scarecrow? I knew it was a bad idea keeping him there," Gordon sighed. "Anyone after them?"

"Well, sir, we were going to chase after them, but it seems that the Riddler and his men thought ahead," Paxton was sweating.

"What in the hell are you talking about?!"

Paxton gulped looking behind him as he and other cops were in complete shock that all of their police cars had been sabotaged. Most of them had flat tires, some had engine damage, one's roof was even caved in. Paxton said back into the phone, "We're gonna need some back-up."