3. Doubt

"This is the epitome of everything you see in the movies,
And this world is a time bomb ticking, and I think I can stop it if you help me.
I am unraveling unbearably empty and if this ground gives way,
I just hope that you'll catch me."
"Saved" The Spill Canvas

It was very dark when I came around.

Which was terrifying.

Though I kept my eyes shut, the lack of hue on my lids proved it was nighttime. If my ears did not deceive me, crickets and frogs were orchestrating the eerie silence all around me.

Every cell in my body ached. My head pounded with each even breath I took, and my limbs ached painfully. Gritting my teeth, I tried to roll over onto my stomach, but the second I moved my leg an inch, I had to grit my teeth and exhale my scream in a hiss.

Instantly, someone scurried to my side. "Max," Fang breathed, emotion pumping through his voice. "God…" he took in a shaky breath. "Max." I could hear the struggle in his voice. He was trying to hide his feelings.

I groaned lowly in pain. "What…?"

"You collapsed and rolled down the riverbank into the water. You almost drowned before I managed to get down there. It sounded like… you were in so much pain." His voice dropped even quieter.

Fang had never been this emotionally outright with me before. So… tender. Kind. Concerned.

"I'm sorry," I said, my voice a bit stronger.

"Don't apologize," he snapped. "Do you honestly think it's your fault?"

I ignored him. "Where are we?"

"In a cave. You've been asleep since this morning. It's almost one now."

"In the morning?"

I was suddenly aware of how hot I was, and I moved in discomfort. There was something heavy covering me, and whatever it was, it was extremely warm.

Fang moved it off me quickly. "It's cooler outside."

"I honestly don't know if I can move."

It was still for a moment, and then his careful hands were lifting me as carefully as he could. I ground my teeth in an attempt to prevent myself from crying out in pain. It'd make him feel horrible.

The cool air that swirled around us, along with the comforting light of the moon, helped a great deal. "Iggy's out here," he murmured. "He couldn't stand the dripping in the cave. It was really magnified to him, and he said he couldn't get any sleep."

"And he prefers the crickets."

Fang grinned.

When I caught a glimpse of his face in the moonlight, I could see every emotion splayed on out his face. He was concerned, but he was intrigued. Relieved. Amused. However, the most prominent was the worry that was etched into every pore – he was really, really freaking out over it.

He set me against a tree trunk easily and then sat next to me. Already I felt so much better, which amazed me. I stretched my arms in front of me, and my left leg. My right gave me some issues, but I'd be good by morning, I was sure.

We were quiet, only listening to the cool breeze rustle the leaves on the trees, and Iggy's soft, even breathing.

Was it pathetic that I was afraid to go to sleep? I didn't want to have another nice-dream/brain attack, followed by Demons R' Us. Not like I even knew what this "demon" was – a dark figure with blazing red eyes. Or maybe it was just a figure of my imagination?

That made me stop.

Could it just be my paranoid self creating odd obstacles that were merely nightmares? Maybe that person or thing represented a scientist from the school, or Jeb, or the evil Max who had killed Ari and hurt so many people.

But what if it was real?

The Voice had said it was my future.

The Voice had also been Jeb at one point.

Hadn't it?

Aggravated, I growled and pressed an open palm to my face.

"Are you okay?" Fang asked tentatively.

"Fine," I answered grimly. "I just…"

He scooted closer to me, putting one strong arm around my shoulders. He pulled me closer into him, and I submissively curled against his body, trying to blink back tears.

"I really just wish I knew what was going on," I admitted in a broken whisper.

Instantly, he pulled me even closer, pressing his face into my hair. "Don't worry about it," he murmured sincerely. "I will do everything in my power to make this okay. It will be okay. Everything's going to fine… everyone's going to make it through this. I just wish…" he trailed off and pulled back, meeting my eyes. "You would stop scaring the shit out of me."

I was startled into a smile, though it was a miserable one.

"I'm serious. Please."

Now his face had no hint of joking. He paused for a moment, thinking out his words carefully. "There are very few things on this planet that I could do without you," he decided, and then looked at me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Don't be."

"I can… hear you," I reasoned with him. "You're… the only voice I can pick out, besides the Voice and the… thing's voice. I just… I can't respond to you. I'm already screaming, which is bad enough… I can only imagine what that's doing to the kids…"

"They're just as worried as I am… and they don't even know as much. Gazzy's getting so many feelings off of you, it's terrifying him."

Guilt swept over me, and the same tears from earlier pricked behind my lids. "I hate this," I moaned. "What am I supposed to do? Tell them that I've been having weird, futuristic dreams about their death? About a guy who had me in a vat of blood, with Angel's wings hung over his doorway? How he's telling me how it's all going to happen in time, and all this crazy stuff that I can't deal with?"

My voice had grown excessively loud as my hysteria had progressed, and now I realized I was sobbing, and Fang was rocking me gently in his arms. Brokenly, I could notice that Fang was different, too – he wasn't that unmoving statue when I needed him… he comforted me in a way I needed to be comforted.

Even in my deliriousness, I could hear that Iggy's gentle breathing had stopped, and now he was still as a rock up in the tree. "I'm sorry," I choked out to him, but he didn't respond. Fang rubbed my back gently.

I had no idea what to do, or how to deal with this. But Iggy knew now. And eventually, they all would have to know.

But I couldn't deal with that now.

So instead, I cried harder into Fang's chest, not bothering to stop the steady tear flow.