A/N: Ok so I'm really sorry that I haven't updated in a long time I have been soooo busy with Pageant and Christmas shopping and wrapping presents and of course watching my favorite couples in action lol. Sophie and Nate got together on Leverage so I'm hoping my other ships follow suit soooo this is a Christmas-fic kind of hurt/comfort but whatever.

This is before Jo. but Castle and Beckett are still married.

Disclaimer: I don't own Castle *sniff*sniff*

Kate stood in the kitchen mixing the cookie dough in the bowl while watching the snow fall on the streets of New York City. From the Loft she could see the top of the giant Christmas tree in Rockefeller Centre. Rick was still in bed and she had taken advantage of this time to perform one of her own private Christmas traditions. Every year since her mother had died Kate had made the exact same cookies that they had made together alone, then afterwards she would take two and wrap them in a paper towel and place them a Ziploc bag in a futile attempt to keep them warm. Then she would walk down to where her mother was buried and talk to her until the cold finally got to her. Afterwards, she would regretfully walk back to her apartment, curl up in bed and sleep off the painful memories.

To Kate the plan was simple she would finish the cookies then she would go take a shower and get dressed. On her way out she would write Rick a note so as not to wake him, then she start her yearly ritual.

Kate walked back into the kitchen to begin her day.

Rick stood there and watched his wife stare out the window in the living room. He knew she was thinking about how she would tell him what she was going to, no had to, do today. He had always known the significance of today to her. That's why not once in their whole platonic or dating relationship did he ask her to do anything on this day. He knew this was something that she would have to do alone because he knew her.

As she made her way back into the kitchen he followed her closely and silently. As she sat the bowl on the counter he wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck.

"Good morning darling," he stated sweetly.

"Hey," she sighed.

"I was planning on leaving you alone all of today if that's what you want," he started as she turned on him quizzically. "I know it's your day with your mom."

She smiled sadly and glanced down at this.

"Hey," he whispered lifting her chin forcing her to look at him. "It's nothing to be ashamed of darling. And it doesn't bother me. Besides if you go I will actually be able to write. Without you here to distract me.'

"You could have written this week instead of coming to the precinct," she smiled, "but 'Nooooooooooo'"

"You know I just want to be near you baby." At this, they both laughed.

She turned away and leaned on the counter while letting her head hang down.

"Rick," she whispered. He walked over to her once again and kissed the back of her neck before turning her around to face him. "I want…. I want you to….to go with me today."

"If you don't want me to I don't want to impose on you."

"No Rick I want you to. Please."

"Of course I will." He gave her a gentle kiss and held her for a long while.

A/N: I am going to write more on this one if you guys want it so please let me know. I'm so sorry if it was awful. Please let me know.

Love you guys,

Lizzie :)