Here is part II, there will be a part III that will be in the past and will explain how these two end before Rose is born. Part IV will be the final out take for these two and it will occur current day.
Sorry I have been MIA – My dad got sick and I've been taking care of him so I am behind. Sorry, but RL is crazy right now.
Usual disclaimer I own, nodda, but I like to play in the VA sandbox, thanks Richelle for permitting me.
Janine and Abe Part II
It had been three and a half weeks since Abe left Turkey. He kept in contact with me through his younger sister, Yesmin. She and Abe were very close and he had told her about us. I think he asked her to look after my welfare while he was away. She spent a lot of time with me and we had become good friends.
Yesmin would never give me specific details, but said that he would come for me soon, before I had to leave with Lady Voda.
Days turned into weeks and with each passing night I got more and more nervous. I had five more nights before Lady Voda and I were set to leave and head to Court with Tatiana Ivashkov.
Tatiana had shaken up the Royals thanks to Erol Mazur's influence and there was to be a vote at the end of the month by the Royal families whether or not she would be in and Zeklos would be out. My charge and Tatiana often talked about her taking charge and you could see the greed shining in their eyes as they spewed hopeful comments about the future. As normal us Guardians sat back and watched as they plotted their future power. Their behavior was glutinous and normally I would have put a blind eye like a good little Guardian, but they often spoke of Abe.
Any mention of him and my hackles would rise with jealousy, interest and concern. It was clear Tatiana had deep feelings for him and she was plotting how they could be together and work around the laws. She hadn't even received power and she was already scheming how to make Abe, her former lover, her husband. Each time she referenced him she would use his proper name, Ibrahim, when it rolled off her tongue I internally cringed.
The first time they spoke of Abe and Tatiana's intimacy I fought back bile. I was so innocent and now I knew of at least two other lovers he had before me, Elma and Tatiana. Could he really love me and make good on his promises? He had experience while I was so young and naive. Each day his sister reminded me he would come for me, but not seeing him for so long I let my doubts swirl with Tatiana's words and I wondered if I had imagined it all. Maybe I just thought he said those things to me, spun his words, let love and hope play with the fringes of my mind.
That night I pulled out a calendar and marked the day as done before I retired to bed. Four more nights and then we would be leaving. Will he come, would I ever see him again? Was I imagining it all? I played these questions over and over again in my mind tossing and turning. I was up most of the night, I had dozed for a few minutes, but then I woke and was ill. I ran to the bathroom and dry heaved until egg- yokish stomach bile was finally heaved out of my mouth. As I watched it swirl down the toilet I heard a knock on the bathroom door.
"Janine are you okay?" Yesmin asked.
I rinsed my mouth and brushed my teeth watching Yesmin eye me from the mirror. She looked concerned and I could see the wheels clicking in her mind. I wonder if she had heard from Abe.
"Janine?" She asked with her cute Turkish accent. I loved to hear her talk it reminded me so much of Abe. "Do you think you could be pregnant?"
What. "What?"
"Um do you think you could be pregnant?"
"Um no..well… I don't know?" Shit I did sleep with Abe that first night, but you can't get pregnant your first time, I mean you bleed right so it washes the sperm out right?
She walked towards me and hugged me. "I think you are, but we need to confirm. Come on."
"Where are we going?" I asked as she pulled me to my bed.
"Lay down. Look sick. I am going to get you the day off and then I am going to steal one of Azad's girlfriend's pregnancy tests."
"Oh" She tucked me into bed.
"Look I know this is a shock, but it's truly a blessing. My brother will be so thrilled!" She looked at me with shining excited dark eyes. They twinkled just like Abe's.
"Okay you rest I'll handle it all." She was so confident and wise beyond her nineteen years; I wished I could be more like her.
Being exhausted I fell asleep and dreamt of my life with Abe and our baby. I imagined taking care of both of them and also protecting them. I was like Betty Crocker, Mary Poppins and GI Jane all wrapped into one woman who was a nurturer and protector.
"Janine wake up I have food and you need to pee on a stick. But eat first I am sure you are famished."
I was, I inhaled the food, I don't think I had ever been so hungry; could I be eating for two? I rubbed my stomach. Yesmin put her hand over mine. "I hope it's a girl, I can't wait to be an aunt."
"But it will be Dhampir. You will still love it?"
She smiled at me with her kind eyes. "It will be part Abe, and part you. We will all love it."
I fought tears. "I am scared."
She hugged me. "No, don't be scared. Abe loves you. He's coming for you tomorrow."
I pulled away and wiped my tears. "He is." She nodded smiling through her tears. "Does he know?'
Her smile fell a little. "No, I wanted to be sure. But I know my brother he will be thrilled."
"Even for a Dhampir baby?"
She nodded her head. "No not a Dhampir baby, his baby." She was excited and so upbeat it was catching. I smiled back at her remembering my dream of my little family living in a loving home in Russia.
"Did you get the test?" She nodded and smiled.
"Yes - are you ready?"
I read the instructions three times since she could only find one test, I needed to make sure I did it right, we had one shot at this. "Wait I forgot to ask, are you late for your period?"
I was so preoccupied with thinking of Abe I missed that I missed my period. I looked at her anticipating eyes. "I am I should have started it last week. I just forgot with Abe…" She nodded in understanding.
"Okay so go, I can't stand the temptation any longer." I scurried in the bathroom and peed on a stick. I covered the tip and looked at my watch. I walked out to Yesmin looking at me, her big dark eyes waiting in anticipation.
"We have to wait two more minutes." I set the stick down and we both watched it in silence. Yesmin held my hand and I appreciated the support.
"It's time, but I can't look, can you?" Yesmin nodded and looked at the stick.
She smiled at me. "It better be a girl, I want to dress her up in pink and make her a ballerina." Oh my god I am having a baby with Abe Mazur.
Ooo ooO === Ooo ooO=== Ooo ooO=== Ooo ooO=== Ooo ooO
I can't keep the smile off my face. Abe is lying next to my bare stomach talking to the baby. Of course he's talking in Turkish so his words are private. I know he's saying sweet things I can tell by his tone. I rub his hair lighting and giggle a little.
He looks at me, one eyebrow cocked. "Something funny my flower?"
I shake my head. "No"
He stalks up my naked body. "Oh really? You know I have had men shot for less." I know he's teasing he likes being tough, but I know the truth, I know he's a softy inside. He gives me a big passionate kiss, he pulls away and searches my eyes.
"So what are we going to name her?"
"Her?"
"I've been talking to Yesmin too much she's convinced me it's a girl." We had been in Russia for a week. It was the best week of my life. We were staying in a small little house, we barely ventured out, but when we did it was to go to dinner.
"Well let's see her last name or his will be Scaife so it needs to sound good with that."
"Scaife?"
"Yes, Dhampir children always take the last name of their mother."
"My flower, this is not a Dhampir child, it's my child." Oh.
"So you want to give her…or him your last name?"
He brushed my cheek tenderly. "Of course my flower, so what name?"
"I've always like the name Marie or Steven? What about you, what name do you like?"
"Well since you are my flower I like the name Rose?"
"And a boy name."
He shakes his head. "I agree with Yesmin it's a girl. The next one will be a boy. So Rose Marie Mazur?"
"Sounds nice, but how about Rosemarie Yesmin Mazur?"
He gives me a sweet kiss. "I love it, Rosemarie Yesmin Mazur. You know she's going to spoil this baby so much, it's only going to get worse if we name her after Yesmin."
He traces my lips, I kiss his finger. "My grandmother used to say you could never love a baby enough." He hums his agreement and then shows me how much he loves me. That night our lovemaking was sweet and slow, it's almost as if Abe knew it would be the last time he could show me physical love.
I wake up nauseous and starving, which has become the norm. I feel the cold bed next to me and find a box of crackers and a rose. This one is pink; I get it a pink rose for his baby girl he wants to name Rose. He is such a cornball – I love it!
I see a note. "Sorry love the baby told me not to wake you; I know you both need your rest. I have left for urgent business – be home tonight. Love A"
I get a little concerned about the comment urgent business, but I brush it aside and decide to spend the day training. I have one Guardian with me and he agrees to work with me so I don't get fat and rusty with my pregnancy.
I shower and make some food. I feel anxious and I think it's just because Abe is gone and I still feel this little town in Russia is unfamiliar. It will be our home, but it doesn't feel homey yet.
After our training and lunch we both sit and watch some TV. It's foreign, but I try to pay attention so I can learn the native language.
I hear a knock at the door and both Pavan and I are on instant alert. We both stand on either side of the door with our stakes. "Pavan its Erol Mazur open the door."
Oh no. Pavan opens the door and I retreat to my bedroom to hide. In my panic I don't lock the door and Erol enters.
"Hello Guardian Scaife."
"Hello Mr. Mazur."
"Please call me Erol." I nod and smile, but my throat is thick with emotion so I don't utter a word.
He sits down in the only chair in our room, claps his hands together and rubs them together lightly. "So, it seems my oldest son, my heir, has gotten himself into a little bit of trouble." He knows.
"You seem Janine my family has no secrets and Yesmin is faithful to me and only me." I can't believe she betrayed us and told I feel so violated. "This is a blessing. You see Abe has gotten Elma pregnant as well, she's much farther along, but now he will have a Moroi child and a Dhampir child. A true gift - them being the same age - one will be able to guard and protect the other."
My mouth gapes open, but I have no words. How could Abe lead me on like this, pretend to want a family with me, tell me he had no interest in a Moroi child? Suddenly I feel as young and naïve as I look and his betrayal stings hard. I take all my years of training and fight the hurricane of emotions about to erupt out of my skin.
As calmly as I can I compose myself and speak. "I see." My voice is scratchy and shaky.
"That's all you have to say." I give him a stiff nod.
"Hmm you are a strong one; this child you bear might be better suited to be my Guardian one day." I clinch my fists, I don't know if he's trying to rattle me, but it's starting to work. I fight to keep my composure trying not to let him get to me, to win.
I say the only thing I can think of. I need him and I need him badly. "Where is Abe?"
"Ibrahim is coming. You see my son thinks he can decide his own fate, but it has already been decided for him, the day he was conceived his life had a path and he will follow that path - especially now that I have leverage over him."
I gasp and protectively cover my belly. He's using my baby to control Abe. I see red, the protectiveness pushing me to the brink of insanity. I imagine a hundred ways to kill him. As if they sensed my rage three Guardians enter and hover over Erol. They take my stake and I don't fight, it's useless and I can't hurt the baby.
"I need to hear it from Abe."
"Yes, I agree, he will be here shortly. He's with Elma making plans." I can't help it anymore I run to the bathroom and empty my stomach contents. Pavan Abe's young Guardian comes in to comfort me.
"I am so sorry…" He looks at me with pity, I choke on it. Now I am a pity case. Why was I so fucking stupid to trust him? How did I do this to my baby? I rub my stomach and lean against the bathroom wall gasping for air.
"Abe's on his way." I gape at him in shock.
"Is he bringing her?"
Pavan grimaces. "Yes. But I am sure he'll have her wait in the car?"
"What's going to happen to me?"
"Mr. Mazur will finish explaining." He helps me up and I appreciate his kindness.
"Thank you Pavan."
He gives me a concerned look. "I am sorry Janine." I give him a curt nod putting my mask back in place, I have to be strong.
I walk out to find Erol waiting patiently, it annoys me how calm he looks, my life is over and he's blasé about it like it's any other day. I imagine more ways to hurt him. I measure the protection he has and I think I might be able to kill him, but then I protectively cover my stomach and realize this isn't about just me anymore.
"So Janine my Dhampir children and siblings all live on our compound, they become our Guardians and servants. With your child I am pleased that now I will be able to add grandchildren to that mix." I gulp thinking about the people I have encountered and if all of them are relatives.
"But it's too soon to have you around. Elma is very jealous so I suggest we send you to America to a Moroi academy to have the child. When he or she is old enough to work then we will bring them home. As for you?" He taps his chin contemplating.
"I would love for you to Guard me, but Elma is problematic - maybe in time. For now you will stay at the academy with your child and by the time they are four or five she should have calmed down enough, at that time you can then join my team of protection. This way your training will have advanced and you will have matured, which in turn will ensure my protection."
I glare at him. I never thought I could feel so much hate. I hate this man and someday I will get my revenge on him. My entire life and the life of my child are crumbling and he's worried about his damn future daughter-in-law's feeling and his protection. I channel my hate and force it to morph to strength. I don't let him see my internal despair; I will not give him that contentment.
We sit in silence while he reads some papers, they look like contracts. I decide to start packing I need the busy work to keep my mind sane.
Finally I hear a car pull up and the door open. Abe rushes in and embraces me. I inhale his scent and feel his large body envelope me for one beat, then I pull away. He looks devastated, but I don't let it get to me, he isn't worthy.
"My flower, are you okay?" I just glare, how okay could I be.
He swallows nervously and looks to Erol, who nods as if to confirm I know everything. "I am sorry…" His feeble apology falls on deaf ears. I look away and finish packing the room silently, every eye is on me. I feel Abe's stare and I try to hate him, but I know deep down as much as I should I cannot. But I will not give him the satisfaction in knowing this - he doesn't deserve my love, me or my child.
"Please Janine do not hate Yesmin." I just give one hard laugh and don't look at him.
I put my stake in my Guardian uniform and turn to my audience. "I am ready." My blue eyes are ice cold and I don't dare make direct eye contact with Abe.
I am escorted out to a waiting limo. "Good by Janine, I look forward to seeing you in a few years." I give Erol a nod and imagine the ways I can hurt him. He must know what I am thinking since he chuckles a little and gets in the limo Abe pulled up in. As the door opens I see a pretty young Moroi, she is obviously Turkish like Abe, she glares at me and I look away. I need to keep my composure and if I think about him and her and their baby I will lose it.
"My flower. I lov – " I have to cut him off.
I look at him and give him a stare so he knows how deep he has cut me. His composed face crumbles and I get some satisfaction knowing he's hurting too. "Don't, just don't. I hate you and I never want to see you again. Stay away from me. You are dead to me and now my child has no father."
He gaps and steps back a little like I have physically punched him. Pavan opens the door for me and I get in, Pavan follows me into the limo and shuts the door. I feel Abe's stunned stare, but I don't look at him as we drive off.
As we pass through the town I imagine what hell my life and the life of my child will be. We pass a house and I see Dhampir children playing out front while their mother and grandmother wash windows. I can see and feel the love they all share.
The only boy looks at our car protectively, his brown eyes calculating thoughts way beyond his years. It is summer and by his stance I am assuming he's already in Guardian training and probably home from his academy for summer. He sees the limo pass the house and looks relieved that we do not stop, it was as if he was expecting it to be someone else. My insides crumble since I know that I will never be able to give my child a home and love like this family share.
At that moment I vow that no matter what this baby will be safe and I will never let Erol or any of the Mazur's get their hands on him or her. I immediately start to plan, but I need more information.
"Pavan, where are we going?"
"America, Montana, St. Vladamir's Academy." I internally do back flips, but don't let Pavan know my joy. I met and have become pen pals with an American Guardian who has been like a mentor to me. Alberta Petrov works at St. Vlad's and I know she will be in mine and my baby's corner.
Erol Mazur will never know, see or touch this child no matter what I have to do; I will ensure my baby is safe from that dreadful man. I look back at the loving Dhampir family sadly realizing my dream of a real family is over. I say goodbye to Russia, to my dreams and to the only man I will ever love.
I protectively cover my stomach and internally tell the little peanut I am growing that everything is going to be okay.
Did you guys catch the little family at the end and who they are? I couldn't resist I had to bring the Russian God in somehow.
Big shout out to Snowgoose who assisted in some mad editing skills on this out take.
Janine has had a tough time of it - I think she deserves a review ;)