Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom Hearts."
Kiome-Yasha: "Going back to college sucks; enough said."
Chapter 4 Bargaining
I didn't know how far I traveled or even cared to discover where I had stumbled. All I could really feel was the freezing temperature of ice winter penetrating through my sore feet and making them numb from the pain that was surging through me. When I finally looked up, snow came over my vision, layering over my body and doing little to ease my suffering.
I panted heavily, puff of air escaping through my mouth, tears falling down on my flushed cheeks as they turned icicle. They tingled down my anesthetize cheeks, the feeling causing me to tremble from its moist slide.
I looked around me, finding myself to be outside and away from the place I considered hell. I bathed in the sensation of the frosting atmosphere, taking a gulp of saliva and shuttering out a sigh. I closed my eyes momentarily before opening them up again, magically, and ironically; I found myself to be led back to the place where I had first met my other half. The girl that smiled no matter how bad her life got; until that glass that surrounded her heart was finally shattered.
How stupid was I? I just let those pieces remain broken, letting Namine handle everything on her own until she bled herself to death. She had tried to repair herself, only to become miserable over her inner turmoil; God knows the attempts she did to end her life. I shuttered with abhorrence over the thought, my heart clenching tightly and suffocating me.
I gripped my hands to my face, trying to resist the overflowing tears from the harsh truth. I then let myself breath-in the cold air, taking slow steps forward over the snow infested and abandoned playground.
I reached over the swing sets, the rusty bars creaking from the passing gust of wind; the swing set being Namine's favorite. I dusted off the snow that was piled over one swing, sitting myself down and letting my mind drift away.
I lightly swayed myself back and forth, looking up at the grey colored sky, spotting the sun over the horizon. The heated wave of the sun did little to stop the cascading white powder from above. The wet snow fell over my body, making my hair feel drenched along with my coat; I didn't care, I wanted anything to numb the pain I was feeling.
The ashen color of wisp took my mind back to Namine. She had been depressed over the course of the years, and me; being the bad husband that I was didn't do anything to heal with her. I mourned alone from our loss, letting my grief consume me to depression. I let myself become lost over bottles of liquor, hoping for the liquid acid to burn away the memories that I couldn't gain.
By doing this, I never noticed…I never noticed…Namine…
"Dammit…" I grinded my teeth, mashing them together so hard that it throbbed, "Namine…please forgive me…" I couldn't stop the tears from falling, feeling like I was the worse prick that ever existed, "I'm so sorry…I never meant…"
Before I knew it, I looked up at the sky, my eyes rimmed with traces of red as my tears left me to go dry, "I don't believe in you, but…" I couldn't believe what I was about to do, but I had no other person to turn to besides the one that was inching towards death, "I don't even think you exist, considering how fucked up you made the world to be…but…please…I pray to you after so many years of being stupid…please, let Namine live through this." I clenched my hands together, placing my forehead on top of them, "I know I've been selfish, but please; let me be selfish one more time and give her back to me… so I can fix my mistakes…"
I shook my head, "Dammit, this is useless..." I forced my head down, crunching my face to a frustrated expression, "I want to make things right…just give me another chance…" I tried to bargain and explain, my body completely leaving me to feel nothing else but my pulsing and pumping heart. The blood that traveled through my veins did little to recover my lost warmth.
The sun lifted itself to the sky, its light and warmth causing the snow to glisten all around me. I sighed, rubbing my hands into my wet hair, taking my gaze up to the lit up sky. The neon colors or pink, orange and purple reflected off of my eyes as they brought me back to the time when Namine officially became part of my life.
RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN
Roxas knew with Namine being pregnant, it was only natural for him to propose her hand in marriage. Although it took him much time to ask the girl to be his wife, considering the lost of time he received when seeking for Terra's approval. Safe to say, Namine's cousin wasn't so happy over the predicament the two young teens had put themselves in. But Roxas swore to him, he would get a job to support them and the baby; dropping right out of school and ditching the Organization XIII for the girl who was carrying his child. He wanted to show Terra that he was the one meant to be by Namine's side; that he was responsible and worthy enough to be her husband.
As for Namine, she was busy watching her health. She was so young to be pregnant and so undeveloped that she had many risks over her condition to be lethal. Plus, she followed Roxas's influence and dropped out of school, in order to claim the consequences of their actions. She agreed over Roxas's proposal, becoming a little disappointment over the fact that he didn't have a ring yet; but she knew he couldn't afford one. He did promise her though, that he would get her one in due time; one that dazzled and shined like her eyes and glowed like her flaxen-colored hair.
After awhile, Roxas did get Terra's approval; though the older male still wasn't happy about it.
Roxas had told Sora and Xion what happened, the both of them actually excited than disappointed like Terra was. They fully supported Roxas and Namine; despite the fact that his parents weren't very pleased.
Namine remembered the fight Roxas had with his father, the abuse he received from his negligent actions causing her to be distraught. He eased her mind though, joking how it was just her hormones talking. He mentioned to her how much of a bastard his father was being over the situation and that he didn't need him to support her and their baby. They had hoped though that he would lend them a hand; but it would still seem that he still had a grudge against his x-wife for cheating on him each time he looked at Roxas.
Roxas, Sora and Xion's mother had gone to rehab, leaving Roxas on his own and to fend for himself. Luckily, Terra had agreed to help him pay for an apartment to live with Namine; it wasn't much, but it would have to do. In addition, Namine was the one who had picked out the cheap and vacant spot, hoping the apartment to be their new home. She was perky and happy about it, too overjoyed over her and Roxas getting married to even feel down. Roxas didn't know why though, finding their lives to be too disoriented to actually celebrate.
But, he was content; finding Namine's smile to be the drug he needed to get over the ordeal.
Over the course of one month though, Namine and Roxas were finally settled into their new home. They didn't plan their wedding to be anything big or special, just a few friends gathering together to witness the event. But once again, Roxas made another promise to Namine; a promise to give her the best wedding she could ever dream of as soon as he had the money to afford it.
The apartment was dark and shady, some paint peeling off the stained walls. Namine was dressed in elegant white, a dress that belonged to her deceased mother. She stuck her tongue out as she tried to settle up the Mickey Mouse clock she had bought not too long ago with Olette and Xion. She stood and wobbled on top of a rigid chair, catching her balance in due time before finally mounting the clock on the kitchen wall.
"There." She complimented herself, finding the clock to be perfect. She turned when she heard Roxas lecturing her from the small dining room, "Namine, you should be more careful!" He dashed towards the girl who seemed to pout and sigh from his vigilant attitude, climbing off the chair and placing it back where it was, "Roxas, I'm fine. I'm only one month pregnant, I'm not disabled you know." She kindly reassured the young male blonde, finding him to be having a panic-attack.
"I know, but you shouldn't risk doing these things! I care too much about you and the baby to let something bad happen to the both of you." He spoke sternly, scanning her body to make sure she was all right.
She nodded meekly with a slight blush, hearing a knock from the door. She reached for it right away, holding her stomach carefully as she rushed towards the door; she had a faint bubble already beginning to swell.
She opened the door and smiled when she saw Xion and the others enter inside the apartment.
"Namine, you look so beautiful! Too bad there isn't a ring to complete it all up." Xion muttered, causing Roxas to glare at her. Namine only chuckled though, finding her day to be too much of a blessing one for it to get ruined, "I'm sure I'll be fine without it." She reassured humbly, giving Roxas a loving smile, which he returned. He felt lucky to have such a caring person like Namine, considering how damaged the girl's life was.
"We should be going!" Olette clarified, "We have the appointment set up for two o'clock this afternoon at the town hall!" She helped and hurried Namine and the others out the door, leaving Axel behind with Roxas.
Both males heard the brunette make some type of lecture at Sora, mentioning about something over fixing his outfit and getting the car.
The tall and crimson-haired male slumped his large hands into his deep pockets, making his way over to Roxas while producing a short whistle, "So…marriage and a baby, huh?"
"Wasn't exactly the plan; but yeah." The dirty blonde's tone seemed wry.
They were silent for a while before Axel decided to speak again, scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably, "Hey…" Roxas took his attention on his best friend, who was surprisingly sober for the event of his wedding day, "You may had loads of shit happen to you and jerked yourself off to Gods no what trouble when in the gang, but…don't fuck this up." He gave Roxas an intense stare, actually making the blonde freeze where he was and become a little apprehensive.
"Don't worry…I won't…" If only he knew how those words turn out to be false in the future.
They made it to city hall, all of them gathering in front of the building and heading up the long set of stone steps. Roxas pushed the glass made door open, giving Namine the luxury to enter inside carefully while holding her swollen stomach. Everyone followed inside after her, Roxas being the last one to enter inside the governed building.
They made it to the front desk, Sora being the first to speak up, "Hi, we're here over the appointment in arranging the marriage of Roxas Summers and Namine Mikoto." The secretary officer replied somberly, "Do you have the papers regarding their licenses and birth certificates?"
Terra slipped inside his coat, pulling out an orange looking folder, "I have it right here." He passed it over to the gentlemen with respect.
The man opened the folder and peered over the papers under the rim of his glasses, double-checking everything to be there, "Everything seems to be valid." He then looked over a large booklet, "You arrived just in time. The parson that has been set up for you is down the hall." He pointed a finger towards the direction.
Namine smiled at the man, "Thank you." Everyone made their way down the hall, Roxas helping and walking next to the girl he was to be wedded to.
The entered inside the domain of the ceremonial room, the total of people to witness the event being the limit of five: Terra, Sora, Xion, Axel (Roxas's best man), and Olette (Namine's maid of honor).
Roxas spotted the preacher at the end of the room, walking towards the old man, "May you be Roxas Summers? My name is Ansem, I'll be the one who will be carrying out your wedding."
The 'soon to be father' nodded, "Yeah, I'm Roxas Summers. And this is my fiancé, Namine Mikoto." He took Namine's hand and brought her forward, "We don't have rings, but is that okay?" He asked uncertainly, hoping they could still participate in their wedding.
"That is unfortunate, but; I will let it go." He confirmed to him, making the pair smile with satisfaction. He lifted his hands to signal the others, "So, this is the group who will be witnessing the event?" They all nodded, sitting themselves down on the benches that were provided.
Ansem smiled, pulling out a bible to prepare his speech, "Well then, shall we begin?" They all proceeded with the ceremony, Roxas and Namine aligning themselves next to each other in front of the man.
"We are gathered together on this beautiful afternoon to share with Roxas and Namine as they exchange vows of their everlasting love." Ansem began, clearing his throat to begin the passage, "As Roxas and Namine take their vows today, we are privileged to witness the joyous love of a new family, a family that will be nourished and nurtured through the devotion of two separate individuals growing together through the common bonds of love. May their marriage bring them the peace, joy, comfort and contentment that is known in the hearts of all God's children. And may Roxas and Namine both look forward to each new season of their marriage, just as the world looks forward to each new season of the year. For all seasons bring with them their own special moments and memories. An essential requirement of a good marriage is a strong bond of real friendship and trust. Roxas and Namine, your love for each other will grow deeper with every passing day, but it's important to remember that your love stands on a foundation of genuine, mutual affection and respect for each other. To truly LOVE another person is to be willing to accept both their strong points, and their weak points, with equal measures of understanding and respect. The vows you are about to exchange, will serve as a verbal representation of the non-verbal emotions that are as real as any thing that can be seen, heard or touched. For it is not the words that you will speak today that will bond you together as one, but the strength of the love and commitment found deep within your souls." He settled his voice, taking a breather before speaking again, "Let us pray."
Deep down, Roxas didn't believe in God; but to over go the ceremony and to Namine's belief, he followed gladly to the tradition. They all gave a silent prayer before the cleric spoke once more, "At this time, I'll ask you, Roxas, and you, Namine, to face each other and take each other's hands." The two blondes faced one another, Namine's eyes glistening from the growing moist of rising tears.
Roxas badly wanted to rub them away as they began to fall, "Roxas, will you take Namine to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"
Roxas took hold of Namine's petite and slender hands, marveling her soft caress skin; actually feeling unworthy to be in her angelic presence, "I do." He profoundly answered, soothing and hushing Namine's whimpering tears, her face flushed and crinkling as she silently began to cry.
Ansem turned to the crying girl, producing a genuine smile, "Namine, will you take Roxas to be your husband, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish his friendship and love him today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor him, laugh with him and cry with him? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"
Roxas gave a low chuckle, finding the girl to be too caught up with her emotions to answer right away. She struggled to get her words out, her lungs clutching her heart to speak; this caused Xion and Olette to choke up, tears slowly sliding down their own faces.
Namine swallowed deeply, squeezing Roxas's hands for support, "Ye…" She sniffled loudly, "Yes…I do…" She choked back a sob, Roxas blowing some air onto her face to cool off her heating tears, causing the girl to giggle and cry some more.
Ansem nodded with approval from the mutual answer, "At this time, the two lovers shall exchange vows to each other in order to complete the ceremony and collaborate the event of their spiritual journey and their eternal bond. Namine, you shall proceed first in giving your partner your vows." It was at that moment that Axel and Olette got up from their seats, already beginning to slip out pieces of paper that the couple had wrote to each other for the event.
They both halted their best friends though, finding all they needed to say already written within each other's hearts.
Namine confidently began to speak, letting Roxas's deep cobalt eyes be her guide to speak, "Roxas…" She was silent for a moment before continuing; "I honestly didn't know what to think when you came into my life during that day when you beat up my brother. I had gone through so much during that time in my youth, that meeting you seemed to be too good to even be a dream; but I did get the chance to meet you. And I am truly, truly, truly grateful that I did. I…" Tears began to descend down her cheeks once more, causing her voice to shake, "I…I…truly do…love you…being with you has honestly made my life… feel more complete… than I could ever feel…" She began to tremble, "It makes me think…that despite everything I've been through…it couldn't be that bad…if I had you with me…" She wheezed, her eyes actually stinging and becoming puffy red; which to Roxas, made her even more beautiful, "I'm so happy to know you exist in my life…and I hope you accept me and our baby in your life as well." She finally let herself go, letting the tears drown out the last bit of her words.
Roxas didn't care if it wasn't time; he embraced Namine in his arms, placing a soft kiss to her pale forehead.
"I love you…" He whispered, taking in her loving scent of vanilla, letting it be the drag that he needed for the rest of his life.
She muttered back, sniffing up her red nose, "I love you too…" They then separated, their audience becoming touched over their confession and adoration for each other.
Ansem took this moment to continue, "Now Roxas, at this time, I wish for you to begin exchanging your own vows to your partner." The sandy haired teenager nodded, taking a glance over to Namine.
He gently placed his large hands upon her growing belly, their baby giving him the strength to speak, "Namine, I can't tell how much you mean to me; how your existence just keeps me sane. As I stand here, I still come to realize how much I don't deserve you. When I met you the first time, I just knew; I wanted to be the one to save you, but instead; you were the one who saved me from destroying my life. And now, you've given me the most perfect gift I can ever ask for…knowing that you are the one carrying a part of us inside you…just makes me realize, how much I need to be with you, for eternity. I know this sounds pretty cliché, and that I'm usually not good with my words, but; when it comes to you; I'm willing to open my heart. I swear to you, I'm going to do the best I can to be your husband!" He elaborated, his emotions filling her insides, "I'll get the money to give you that ring; I'll get the money to give you that wedding you always dreamed of! Just please, be patient and accept me for who I am; that is all I ask as your husband." Namine nodded vigorously, her tears spilling out of her as she bit her bottom lip from his words. Roxas chuckled roughly from her reaction, cupping her face with his hands, as his lips were inches away from claiming hers.
Seeing as the two newlyweds were getting impatient, Ansem decided to close the knot, "With the power invested in me, I know pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Summers; you may kiss the bride."
Roxas whispered against Namine's lips, "Finally…" He kissed her passionately, motioning their lips to dance together. They could hear their friends and family get up from their seats, applauding the union and matrimony between the two young teenagers.
Roxas tried to deepen the kiss, letting his tongue slip out and capture Namine's in a heated frenzy; but the bugle beneath the light haired bride's dress stopped them.
Roxas laughed at the inconvenience, gazing down at the forming lump, "I think someone couldn't stand all the mushiness." He replied to Namine who only giggled. When he heard the serene sound he kissed her once more, but this time, he didn't let their lips detach themselves.
He poured all his feelings into the kiss, letting his tongue graze over hers in a loving contact of desire and longing. Sora and Axel whistled at them, causing Roxas to hold Namine tightly, rubbing her back and hair; he was careful though as to not hurt the baby.
He swore he could feel it moving against Namine's lower half, revealing a smile to bloom over his lips as he continued kissing his pregnant wife.
Everything seemed to fall into place, but the weight of the promises of a better future only proved to be nothing more than a dream waiting to shatter.
End Chapter
Kiome-Yasha: "Yes, I finally made a Namixas wedding scene! I've been waiting for an excuse to make one so badly since we don't have any. Sorry if this update was late everyone, college is just a major let down for me to be focus on my fanfiction life. This chapter was short, but the next one is going to be long. I kept listening to "Love Song Requiem" by Trading Yesterday when typing this chapter; it actually helped a lot. Once again, all I ask from you guys is to give a supportive review; I hope you won't let me down!"
Sora: "Kiome-Yasha will like to give special thanks to Idiotique (For being the first reviewer and an awesome one at that!) Handwritten (For giving a huge support and long wonderful reviews!) KeytoDestiny (For showing love for the story through long reviews!) OoColorful MuffinoO (For sharing such nice words and comments) Kingdom~sky (For giving a great review!) Silentmusic16 (For reviewing a lot lately!) Damnblackheart (Who is the most awesome person in the world!) AonAllstars (for being a cool Namixas fan and leaving wonderful reviews!) Antiyaoifan (For leaving a review and supporting a lot!) Chococrepes (For being my first true Namixas pal and reviewing my stories!) We love you guys, and hope you will continue to leave reviews!"