In Fate's Hands

Chapter Four:
And I Can't Stand the Pain

Neji had told Shikamaru to give Tenten his forehead protector if something bad happened to him - he had made sure that the lazy ninja knew that request when they first met up with each other. Shikamaru had sworn to that promise - and once he had been rescued from the failed mission and recovered from his injuries as best he could he wasted no time in fulfilling it.

Tenten had stood at her door, staring at the forehead protector in her hands. Lee had come running over, stopping short once he saw what was clutched in Tenten's grasp. Shikamaru then took a brief moment to explain exactly what had happened - how they had been ambushed and Neji took the first initiative to fight, Shikamaru joining him but being overcome too quickly by this advanced enemy. When he had awoken under the care of a member of ANBU, he had immediately questioned Neji's whereabouts.

To Shikamaru's shock, ANBU hadn't been able to recover him. There was no body, no trace of Neji Hyuuga or the enemy anywhere - nothing, nothing except the forehead protector Shikamaru had unknowingly been clutching in his hands.

The chances of Neji's survival, according to an ANBU member who had attempted to recover the Hyuuga, were small. They said he was most likely dead, and should be treated as such.

Lee burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably and gasping out words of remorse towards his rival.

Tenten stood silently next to him, her normally lively brown eyes glazed over as she stared at Shikamaru. Placing a hand on her stomach, she shut her eyes and inhaled sharply. She allowed Shikamaru's story to register in her mind.

Shikamaru watched the two friends uncomfortably, wondering exactly what more he could say or do. He had known that Lee would react in this manner - Tenten, however, was a kuniochi Shikamaru was not well acquainted with. He knew the obvious details - that she was a weapon's mistress and the only female in the entire town who held Neji's love. He knew that she had been Neji's significant other for years, that the two had had a daughter together and that the girl's birth had caused problems in the Hyuuga clan. He was also aware that she was pregnant again - he could tell by Neji's mannerisms on the mission and by the way Tenten had just placed her hand on her stomach, the outfit she was wearing nothing more than an attempt to conceal her bump from the world.

But to Shikamaru, he would have expected a larger and more heartbreaking outburst from a woman who had just been told that her lover was most likely dead.

Seeing no change in either of their attitudes after several minutes, Shikamaru coughed loudly and turned to leave.

"He's not dead." Her voice cut threw the heavy silence like a knife.

Shikamaru turned and looked at Tenten. She was starring at him, her expression pained and her eyes filled with hurt.

"I wish I could believe you," he replied honestly.

Tenten shook her head defiantly. "No," she said. "He's not. He can't be. He wouldn't. Not now. He'll be back. I know it." She started shaking, tears welling up in her eyes. "I know it. Neji once told me we are destined to be together - and I normally don't believe anything about his destiny crap, but I believe him now. I'm leaving him in fate's hands. He'll be back. I know it."

She continued shaking, turning pale with each word, so obviously attempting to convince herself about every word she'd just spoken. Shikamaru felt awkward for a moment and then moved to comfort her, but she backed away. "Does the Hyuuga family know?" she asked instead.

Shikamaru nodded. "ANBU dispatched a member to warn them about it two days ago. According to someone at the hospital, they're holding a memorial service for him tomorrow morning."

Tenten nodded, still shaking. "We'll be there," she said, making a slight gesture at Lee. "I'll be there. And I'll be strong. For Neji. And for Aiko. Because I promised him that I would be a long time ago if anything ever happened to him. And I will not cry. Tears are for the dead. And Neji is still alive."

With that said, she thanked Shikamaru for returning the forehead protector and stepped back inside.

The sky was filled with light gray clouds - they would not release rain upon the memorial service and instead decided to hang grimly above the heads of the people below them. Tenten stood next to Lee, her face emotionless as she stared dully out at the small memorial the Hyuugas had placed in their section of the cemetery to acknowledge Neji. Inside she felt heartbroken, her heart ripped apart and beyond repair, aching with pain at every thought of Neji.

She had not slept the night before - she had sat up in bed with her light on, too afraid to see what would await her if she succumbed to sleep and gathering darkness.

Lee had attempted to comfort her despite the state of his own emotions, and Tenten had refused any help from him. She had refused his comfort, Shikamaru's comfort, the comfort of the tears she refused to not cry and instead turned into the strength that she knew she needed.

It was hard to be strong when all she wanted to do was scream for Neji and cry until her heart gave way.

But she still had their unborn child to live for - and Aiko.

Their beautiful daughter was perhaps the only other person whose heartbreak came close to matching Tenten's own pain.

Aiko stood next to her father's memorial, clutching the white cloth that had been thrown over it as she cried loudly. A tearful Hinata knelt next to the little girl, trying to gently coax her away from the memorial and back to where the rest of the Hyuugas were standing.

A murmur ran through the crowd as Tenten stepped towards the little girl. Aiko looked over at her and continued crying, shrieking "Lady Tenten!" and reaching out her free hand towards her. Tenten knelt down and looked at the small girl, the tears she had swore she would not shed desperately aching to run freely down her cheeks. She opened her arms and Aiko ran forward into the embrace.

Tenten clutched her daughter close to her for the first time since she was born.

Tenten could not shake the image of Hiashi's angered face from her mind - the look of hatred in his eyes when she had held her crying daughter at Neji's memorial service, cradling and kissing the small girl on the side of her head several times and telling her, in a loud voice for all to hear, that Neji was not dead.

Another murmur had run through the crowd at that statement - they all thought Tenten was in denial. She simply wondered why she was the only who believed that Neji was still alive.

She soon found out she was wrong when, three days later, a weary Hinata had shown up at her door with Aiko in tow and announced, with more determination than usual, that she was still convinced that Neji was alive and that she and the little girl were moving in with Tenten to take care of her while she was pregnant.

Tenten could not refuse either of them, considering Hinata to be a close friend. She also found a sign of hope in Aiko - she would finally be able to spend time with her daughter without the threat of Hiashi Hyuuga hanging over her menacingly.

Hinata moved in comfortably on Tenten's couch, giving the small cot that Tenten kept in her closet to Aiko as a bed. Lee courageously announced that he would sleep on the living room floor, using it as training and rejuvenation for his springtime of youth.

Tenten adjusted easily to having Hinata living with her. It was Aiko that she found herself having a problem with. It wasn't that the little girl was being difficult - she was a naturally well - behaved child - but more of the sudden change in her attitude. As the daughter of Neji Hyuuga, Aiko was naturally brilliant like her father and had knowledge of facts and emotions that children her age rarely ever knew until adolescence. Tenten knew it was normal for her daughter to be grieving.

It was the fact that her brilliance, enthusiasm, and radiant personality had vanished.

Tenten's already broken heart broke further for her daughter. She was still mentally debating about how she should go about treating the girl, and the fact that Aiko sat on a chair in the corner of her living room and stared morosely down at her feet was not helping. Hinata was equally worried about the child; she tried her best to get the little girl to interact with everyone, but it was not working. Only Lee managed to get the smallest of smiles from her, but they faded from Aiko's face as quickly as they had come.

After a week of having Hinata and Aiko living in her apartment, Tenten came up with an idea. Creating a list of things to buy, she gave the piece of paper to Hinata and Lee and sent the pair out shopping for the day. Once they were gone, Tenten went straight to her room and removed a picture off her dresser.

"Aiko, come sit with me over here. I have something I want to show you."

The little girl looked with surprise at Tenten. With sadness on her face but curiosity in her eyes, the little girl slid off the chair and climbed up on the couch next to her mother. Tenten smiled at her daughter lovingly and handed Aiko the picture, her hand covering the image.

"Do you know who this is?" Tenten asked, moving her hand slightly to reveal the first person in the photograph.

Aiko looked at it closely, her face breaking into a small smile once she recognized the figure. "It's Lee - sensei!" she exclaimed, pointing at the image of fourteen year - old Lee, grinning broadly with his thumb high up in the air.

"That's right!" Tenten replied happily. She moved her hand to reveal the next figure. "Do you know who this is?"

Aiko leaned in close again, studying the face of the figure. Confused, she looked at Tenten and then back at the picture several times before speaking. "Is that..." she began, staring hard at Tenten. "You, Lady Tenten?"

Tenten nodded and smiled softly. "That's me," she said, her eyes glancing at her fourteen year - old self. "There's one more," she added on, feeling sadness grip her heart. "One more person for you to guess."

Aiko sensed Tenten's sadness, but she smiled slightly anyway. "I'm ready," the little girl said, determination in her voice. Tenten moved her hand off the picture, revealing the last figure.

Aiko looked at the boy in the photograph eagerly. Pale eyes and long dark hair framing a paler face with the slightest smirk on it. Aiko recognized him right away.

"Daddy!" she shrieked, happiness breaking forth from her as she grinned broadly. "Lady Tenten, it's Daddy!"

Tenten felt the tears rush to her eyes and she slipped her arms around the little girl in a hug. "That's right," she whispered, her voice quivering. "That's Neji."

Aiko stared at the photograph, fixated on the three figures. "Lee - sensei, Lady Tenten, and Daddy," she repeated. She whispered the names again and then asked, "Why are you, Daddy, and Lee - sensei in the picture together?"

"We were on a team together," Tenten explained once she had regained control of her voice. "When we were younger. You'll be on a team someday too, when you're older."

"You've known Daddy and Lee - sensei since you were little?" Aiko asked in shock.

Tenten smiled sadly at her daughter's surprise and nodded. "Since we were twelve," she replied. "For the last twelve years, actually. We've been friends for that long."

"Were you good friends?" Aiko questioned.

"The best," Tenten responded. "Lee - sensei and I are like brother and sister. That's how close we are. And your daddy and I..."

She drifted off, lost in momentary thought as an odd feeling engulfed her. It was time, right then and there. Tenten knew what she needed to do. The truth needed to be told, and she would face the consequences that would come. There was no better time for it. No one was around. It was now or never.

Gathering emotional strength, Tenten slid off the couch onto the floor and turned to face her daughter, kneeling in front of the little girl. Aiko's eyes were wide as she stared at Tenten, confused yet curious at the same time.

Tenten slowly reached forward and pushed some of Aiko's dark locks off her face and behind her ear. She paused, taking a moment to really look at her daughter. What she saw brought a smile to her face. It was almost like looking in a mirror - that's how close the resemblance between Aiko and Tenten was.

Savor the darker hair, pale skin, and pale eyes - those were strictly Neji's.

Moving her hand from behind Aiko's ear, Tenten grasped the little girl's hands. "I want to tell you something," she began slowly. Aiko nodded. "You might not understand me," Tenten continued. "But I think you will. And it's going to be a surprise. Are you ready?"

Aiko nodded. Tenten tightened her grip on the little girl's hands.

"Aiko, I'm your mother. I'm mommy."

Silence followed her announcement. Tenten was too afraid to look at her daughter, too afraid to even glimpse the expression that was written on Aiko's face. But she knew she needed to, and very slowly she allowed her eyes to seek her daughter's face.

Aiko was staring at Tenten, and Tenten was shocked to see that she was crying silently. Unsure of what to feel except sadness, unsure of whether or not her daughter's tears were a good or a bad sign, Tenten pulled Aiko towards her, wrapping her arms around her daughter in a hug. Tenten felt the little girl grip her sleeve as her silent tears turned into sobbing.

"Please don't cry," Tenten whispered, not knowing what else to say as her own tears threatened to overflow. "Please don't. I love you, Aiko. You're my little girl. I love you so much. Please."

Aiko only cried harder, but she did not reject Tenten. Tenten could only hope, as she held her daughter tightly, that this meant that she did understand.

When Lee and Hinata returned a short while later, their previously happy chatter turned into silence as they beheld Tenten holding her sobbing daughter, a heavy feeling of sadness filtering across the room.

(Fin)

(End of Chapter Four)

A/N: Gah, another cliffhanger! I'm sorry...they're just really easy to write for this story!

I really like this chapter, even though it's very sad - particularly the scene between Aiko and Tenten. In regards to whether or not Neji is dead or alive, that remains to be seen. He could be, he could not be. Tenten thinks he is, and I think her opinion is the one to trust the most.

Thank you for reading and please review!

Chapter Five: Coming Soon!