A/N i'm thinking on posting every tuesday and saturday? just so there is some sort of schedule

i'll try and keep that up until I finish the (unofficial) 'first part' of the story, and then probably take a break to catch up... but we have PLENTY to go before we get there

thanks to everyone for being so nice, i do write this for fun and as a way to de-stress, so pretty much if you don't like it, don't read it, i'm just here for a chill time xx appreciating that it's all been positive so far though, so thank you a lot for that

thanks to ArcticFox, FoxyForever and FarFromTheSun for reviewing xxx

The rest of the holidays passed by uneventfully and when it was time to leave, Mila was sad to say goodbye. They would get to see Lupin at school, but they wouldn't get to see Sirius until after the easter break.

Harry still had his side of the two-way mirror, so he could see Sirius when he wanted to, but it wasn't the same. They both hugged him goodbye, and when Lupin left the room Sirius asked if he could see the map for a second.

He quietly cast a charm on it, one Mila had never heard before, and swiftly handed it back to Harry. Mila didn't know if he knew she had seen, but figured it was his to play with. He was probably just updating it, and hoping Lupin didn't think he was trying to get Harry and Mila to cause trouble.

Sirius was able to accompany them to the train station in his animagus form, and as they stood on the platform he kept jumping up playfully at her as she laughed.

"We have to go now, Sirius," she said, and the dog whined in return. She leant down and pet him, "I'm sorry. Thank you for a great Christmas."

It hurt to leave him, but Harry, Mila and Lupin all went to board the train. Lupin said a quick goodbye to the two of them and went to find some of the other teachers. Harry and Mila found Ron and Hermione in a compartment with Seamus and Dean.

"Hey guys, how was your holiday?" Mila asked the boys as she sat down next to them. She liked Seamus and Dean, she always had good fun when they were around.

They quickly set off to tell her about their Christmas, the pair making her laugh as they told stories about their families. Hermione glanced at her and gave her a look, which Mila took to mean she wanted a break from the boys. They both excused themselves and decided to take a walk around the train.

They ran into a lot of people, and others had their compartment door open. Mila was met with choruses of 'hey Mila' and 'how was your holiday, Mila?'

Hermione looked at her humorously as the other students continued.

"It's always like this when I walk with you," she said, and Mila waited for her to elaborate.

"Everyone wants to be your friend, they always have."

"What are you talking about? They're just saying hello to us," Mila said.

"Harry's fame is part of it. But look at you, you're soaking up all the attention," Hermione laughed.

"Oh come on, Hermione. I'm not that bad."

Hermione gave one of her knowing looks, which annoyed Mila when she wasn't in on it, and chuckled quietly as they continued walking down the train. Mila knew of course, what Hermione was alluding to. She always made these little observations about Mila's personality, which Mila usually just ignored.

"Hey, Lovett!" a voice suddenly called out. Both she and Hermione turned to see Malfoy smirking at the pair of them.

"Potter proposed yet?" he added. Mila hated when people made jokes about her and Harry like that. It made her have to think about things she didn't want to deal with just yet.

"Yes actually. We're thinking a summer wedding. And no, you're not invited," she replied snarkily. He knew it was a sore point for her, however, and just laughed.

"And here I thought I was going to be best man." Malfoy acted wounded and put a hand on his heart.

"Funny how things don't work out, isn't it?"

"You are particularly feisty today, Lovett. Something the matter?" he asked.

"Yeah. There's a ferret in my way and I just can't seem to get him to move." She knew Malfoy hated being reminded of getting turned into a ferret, and grinned when the smirk was wiped off from his face.

"You really should be nice to me, Lovett. I've got something you have yet to acquire."

Mila wondered what he was getting to, but decided she didn't care. "Oh really? Is it a massive ego?"

She didn't realise that they had drawn a crowd, and was surprised when she heard a sweeping laughter along the train.

"Fine, if you won't play nice, I won't tell you. But trust me, you'll want to know." And with that incredible vague statement Malfoy shut his compartment door as Mila rolled her eyes.

"Bloody ferrets," she muttered to herself, and told Hermione she wanted to go back to their compartment.

Malfoy had something she wanted? She couldn't possibly imagine what it was. If this was him trying to stir the pot then he was just going to have to do better than that.

She was annoyed by the time they got back to their friends, and Harry immediately noticed her change in mood. This just annoyed her even more, she hated how easily he could read her, and it also reminded her of Malfoy's proposal comment. She decided to keep talking to Dean and Seamus so she wouldn't have to deal with it.

Seamus and Dean were more than happy to keep chatting to her for the rest of the train ride, and Ron kept cracking jokes, making her forget all about her confrontation. When they finally reached Hogwarts she turned to give Harry's arm a squeeze to let him know she was ok. He nodded at her, understanding her gesture and they picked up their bags to start getting off the train.

Mila had seen the threstrals ever since first year. She gave one a stroke as she got onto the carriage and started the ride to Hogwarts. She didn't know why she could see them, she didn't remember seeing someone die until Cedric in their fourth year. She always assumed something had happened as an infant or child that she was simply too young to remember. Or at least, had repressed enough to forget.

She was happy to be back at Hogwarts, but she was not happy about the upcoming essays and NEWTs they would have to do. It was already giving her a headache, and she was lucky to have the skills she did, otherwise there was no way she could cope. Ron had already made her promise to help him with Transfiguration, and Harry wanted to start helping her with her patronus. Her chances of pulling another prank were dwindling as she realised she wouldn't have much time for them anymore.

The feast was as to be expected, and Dumbledore's speech had the same message to it that is always did.

"Some of you will face many challenges this year, and as you grow, will learn more about yourself than you ever thought possible," he continued. Mila swore he had glinted at her when he said this, but she was used to Dumbledore's odd hints and figured she would know about it when the time came.

Ron winked at her, he had caught the look too. She chuckled at him as he continued stuffing his face despite the attention they were suppose to be giving to the speeches.

Mila scanned the teachers and found Lupin. She tried to catch his eye to give him a smile, but he was looking at Dumbledore. She did, however, catch Snape's eye and hastily looked away before she got into trouble already on the first day back.

She thought back to what Malfoy had said and scanned her eyes through the Slytherin table to see what he was up too. He was already looking at her as she did so, and when their eyes met he gave her a wink, stirring up even more from the afternoon. This annoyed her to no end, but damn if she wasn't curious to see what he had to say.

Harry had promised they were going to work on her patronus after the feast, and though she had wanted to take it easy her first day back, she didn't want to say no to him.

Not being able to cast a patronus was just about making her crazy, considering everything else she had accomplished. Hermione may be the brightest witch of her age, but there was no denying Mila was the most talented. Spells and enchantments came easily to her. She was always the first in class to get it right, and she was often the base of jealousy because of it. If she put half an effort in her essays and tests, she may have gotten better grades than Hermione. But as talented as she was, she was also too restless to sit down long enough to study for long.

But despite all that she still could not cast a patronus. For someone to whom things came so easily, it was frustrating to not be able to do something.

When the feast was over, Harry made her go straight to the Room of Requirement to practice. He seemed very intent on making her learn it, enough so that she suspected there was something else on his mind and that perhaps he needed a distraction. Either way, she obliged.

"Just remember to think of something happy," Harry said.

She rolled her eyes and scoffed. "You know, I have done this before."

He gave her a playful smile, "Well technically, you haven't."

He laughed at the look she gave him, and continued to do so until she told him to shut up.

"Alright, here goes," she whispered to herself. She closed her eyes and concentrated on a happy memory.

She drew her wand and yelled, "Expecto Patronum." She watched the end of her wand for results, and sighed when the air around her wand was empty. She had a few more attempts, with the same results until she angrily threw her wand across the room.

"Maybe you're just tired?" Harry shrugged, though they both knew that wasn't it.

"Are you sure your memory is happy enough?" he continued, when she stayed silent. It was rare Mila struggled at something, and he hated to see her troubled.

"It's not that," she huffed, trying to figure out why she had such a problem with this spell.

"How do you know?" he asked.

"Because it's of you," she answered, not thinking much of it until she realised Harry had stayed silent for a few minutes. She looked and saw he had a funny look on his face.

"You ok there?" she frowned, and he coughed in reply.

"Uh- yeah. Hm. Whats the- um what is the memory of?" The room wasn't very brightly lit, and Harry was grateful because he knew he was definitely blushing.

Mila smiled as she recalled the memory, "The day we met."

It was the day she had gotten her wand actually. The same day she found to out she was a wizard. McGonagall had been the one to tell her. She had come to the orphanage and asked to see her. Mila had been scared at first, McGonagall was a frightening women when she wanted to be. But when McGonagall had told her she was a wizard, it was like something clicked and her life finally started to make sense. All the tricks she could do, all the power she felt inside her, it suddenly had a name.

That very same day, McGonagall had taken her to Ollivander's. When she had walked through the door, she had been greeted by an old bookish smell. Ollivander had been standing behind the counter and his smile brightened when he saw her come in. She hadn't even said anything before he rushed to the back of his shop and brought out a wand for her. He had told her it was made from acacia wood with a core of a phoenix feather, though she hadn't know what that meant at the time. The second she touched it a warmth had spread through her, and it felt like it belonged in her hand. As someone who, before then, had never truly owned anything before, it was the happiest she had ever felt. Powerful too. And then Harry had walked into the store.

He had been accompanied by Hagrid, and Mila had been too distracted to notice Harry at first. She had never seen a man so large before, and she'd walked over to him before McGonagall could stop her.

"You're huge," she had said, more in awe than anything else.

Hagrid had been surprised but grinned largely at her, "And you are very small."

He chuckled when she smiled back, and it was then she noticed the boy who was standing shyly behind Hagrid. Hagrid had seen her glance at Harry, and softy pulled the boy in front of Mila.

He had knelt down between the too of them, "This 'ere is Harry. Say 'ello Harry."

Mila looked at the boy curiously as he did so. He was about her size, with unruly dark hair and glasses that were slightly askew on his face. But he looked at her like nobody ever had before. He looked at her like she was something to be treasured, and like he knew exactly what it was like not to be. They were the same. They were both orphans. She'd recognised something in him, and he in her.

She'd smiled brightly at him and he'd hesitantly smiled back.

"I'm Mila," she said. Both were too busy smiling at each other that neither had noticed the forlorn look exchanged between Hagrid and McGonagall that day. They only had eyes for each other.

Mila shook herself from the memory, "Do you rememb-?"

"Of course I do," Harry smiled. Mila was caught in the moment until she recalled what it was they were actually trying to do.

She sighed, "Well anyway, it isn't working. And if that doesn't work, I don't know what will."

He smiled tenderly as he retrieved her wand. "I'm sure you'll get it eventually."

She wanted to sit down, and the room conjured two chairs just as the thought crossed her mind. She walked over and sat down in the chair, Harry took a seat in the other and passed her wand back.

"I just wish I could get it already." She sighed and slumped further into the chair.

"What does it feel like? When you cast the spell, I mean."

She thought for a second. "It feels like… something is blocking me. The power's there, the spell is there, but something is stopping the patronus from coming out." She looked at him. "Does that even make sense?"

He shook his head, "I've never heard anything like that before. Maybe you should ask Lupin, he was the one who taught me."

"I guess," she said quietly, "Can we just call it a night?"

The pair walked back to the common room, and Mila was just eager to get to bed. The Christmas holiday had been more exhausting than anything; the visit at the Burrow, plus Sirius had made them stay up most nights. He'd probably trying to make the most of the time he had with them. She was excited to get a proper nights sleep.

Hermione was already in their room when Mila got there. She was sitting on the bed going through a textbook. She spoke without looking up.

"How'd it go?"

Mila sighed, "Not great."

"I'm sure you'll get it eventually," she said.

Mila walked around the room, getting ready of bed, "Harry says I should ask Lupin about it."

Hermione snapped the book shut making Mila jump. "I don't think you should do that."

"What, why?" Mila frowned at the other girl.

Hermione looked like she was thinking her words very carefully. "It can wait," she settled on.

Mila slid into her bed, "Ok, Crazy." She didn't see what the big deal was, but when Hermione Granger told you to do something, you did it.