Disclaimer: Gravitation belongs to Maki Murakami...heck, you know what goes here.

Fallen Angel

by Yui Miyamoto

Chapter 4 - Kawaru. (To change.)

We stood there unable to do anything but just gaze into each other's eyes with no words to convey all the emotions we wanted to express. It was too much for words to handle. All the hurt was rising and we could no longer hold back.

In an almost inaudible voice, Ryuichi brushed his warm lips on my cheek as he whispered, "Gomen."

I looked at everything about the room besides Ryuichi. Then, I didn't know what to respond with, but my hand shakily found its way to the doorknob. Before I knew it, my anger had risen and I whispered coldly back, "You make a fool of me for the longest night of my life, and all you can say is 'sorry'?"

Pushing him away, I looked at him with the cold look I had seen my brother give to everyone including myself. It was the look that was colder than all the ice frozen in Antarctica with a low voice that held back no mercy. "I regarded you so highly, SAKUMA-SAN. But now, after all these years, I'm changing my mind."

Too hurt to cry, I went out of the door without looking back. "Goodbye."

I am not like Shuichi. Though at this point, I wish I were.

I was never so honest with my feelings. Nor can I express them when I really needed to.

I had a clear head that could see everything and anything, except when it came to Ryuichi.

Ryuichi was ALWAYS the exception…

This feeling I had for you was more than love.

It was beyond more than I could say to you or even show.

I would give anything for you. Anything...

At this point, you could never understand how much I had love you.

Never.

You wouldn't understand now.

I really thought you had.

Your feelings had changed after all...

I stepped out of the hotel to find that it had started to rain and very hard. Pouring like buckets onto the uncrowded street, I stopped to look up into the dark sky. Hugging myself from the frigid air, I looked up to his lit room. I felt like a broken-winged angel bleeding in the rain of tears.

Through the blur of the rain, there stood the silhouette of my god...

...still watching over me.

Turning my head to run across the street to my car, I could not cry, but was glad that the rain could do that for me instead. I repeated to myself aloud, "I really thought you had."

Author's thoughts: Short and concise and to the point, are we not? Hmm...I wish I could grasp the depth of this...