Chapter 4

He watched her leave and knew she was heading for the storage area on the floor below. In there were old hard copies of case files that had been uploaded to the FBI internal database but by law couldn't be destroyed yet. No one went in there and it was pretty quiet. He sometimes hid in there to think and the only one he had told was Lisbon.

Jane got up and went to Fischer's office. He tapped on the door and after her quick wave, he came in and sat down. "What can I do for you, Jane?"

He looked around to make sure they were alone before he said, "I want to see all of the surveillance footage of Teresa's singing. Could you please let me see the files?"

"Uh, sure, I don't think that will be problem- under the circumstances," she replied and after locating the files on her desktop system she copied them to a flash drive and handed it to him. "Not to sound mean, but you know how to use this, right?"

He smiled slightly, "Yes, I do."

She watched him leave with a concerned frown. She had viewed the videos when Abbott first read her in on the case. As an objective outsider, watching Teresa's performances was easy and it showed a side of her new friend that she hadn't thought existed. However, given the Jane/Lisbon history that she knew, she couldn't help but think that their consultant was about to be very shocked.

Jane stopped at Wylie's desk and asked to borrow a laptop. Wylie was surprised, too, but gave him one and Jane left the area. He went three floors down to a maintenance closet and set up the laptop and installed the flash drive. Soon he was watching clips of Teresa singing her heart out over what appeared to be the last seven years. That made sense to him. The FBI wasn't always looking over their shoulder at the CBI, only since they had managed to get into some of the uglier turf wars dealing with Red John.

As he watched, he realized he was seeing into her soul in a way she would never have allowed over the years they worked together. This Teresa Lisbon was very open and honest in her feelings to the point of brutal pain. It was also obvious what the main source of the pain was; it was Patrick Jane. Looking at the date and time stamp on each video, he could track when she had felt particularly vulnerable or hurt and each time he could also remember something he had said or done at about the same time. Sure, there were a few times when she sang out some more upbeat feelings but always they seemed to be followed by some terrible lows.

Teresa sang of a love that couldn't be expressed and of a man so distant from her that she felt a fool for loving him. She sang of knowing she should walk away but never being able to let go completely. She sang of missed opportunities and the need for second chances.

Patrick sighed deeply, leaned back, and stared at the screen before he removed the flash drive and placed it in his coat pocket. She was so careful about hiding this from me, he thought. Did anyone know? He wanted to go to her and beg her forgiveness for the past. He wanted to hold her and never let go. He wanted to prove to her that he- and they- were worth all the years of patient waiting.

At that moment, the door gently opened and the object of his adoration hesitantly walked in. "Jane? Are you in here?" She quietly asked. He quickly finished closing out the laptop and checked his watch. He had been so absorbed in the past that he hadn't noticed that the morning was quickly leaving.

"Teresa? How did you find me?" He hoped he sounded normal. He was sure he sounded guilty.

She came around the corner carrying the pile of sheet music. She gave him a slightly strained smile as she answered, "Well, I happen to be pretty familiar with your tendency to establish secluded spaces, so shortly after we started working here I figured out where all the possible Jane Bolt Holes might be."

Jane smiled back at her. "Agent Lisbon, you are still one of the craftiest and smartest agents I've ever known."

She gave him a teasing curtsy in response. "Why thank you, Mr. Jane. Coming from you, I take that as high praise."

She looked around the room lit by one fluorescent bulb with pathways among old storage boxes creating shadowed alcoves. "So what brought you down here?" Seeing the laptop, she added, "And a laptop? My goodness! What could you be wanting to do?"

"Well, I, uh, wanted to, uh -" Patrick wasn't sure if she would be upset with him or not, but he was going to have say something.

"Oh," Teresa interrupted. "You were looking at clips of me."

"Yeah," Jane acknowledged while watching her face carefully. "There were snippets going back quite a while."

"I see," she said while toying with the edges of the sheet music she carried. "So, what do you think? Should I stick to my day job?"

He smiled at her and shook his head. "I think you're are a very talented, beautiful, sexy lady with a strength beyond measure. I'm just grateful to be part of your life."

She could not stop the tears from forming and she set down the music and came to him, putting her arms around his neck. "Oh, that was good. How could I be upset with you after that?"

Patrick embraced her and ran his hands over her slim back. "Oh God, Teresa, I do love you."

"I love you, too," she replied with her head on his shoulder.

Stroking her hair, Jane quietly said, "You know I loved you for longer than I think you ever realized. I was just so fearful of letting you get close to me. And frankly, I still think that it was the only decision I could make at the time. Please, forgive me."

She pulled back so she could look into his eyes. "The past is past and we have each other now. That's the most important thing to me."

"But you have to know that I lived with the daily fear that I would walk into your office or the bullpen, or stop at your apartment and find that damn face painted on the wall. If that had happened, I couldn't have survived it. If that meant you had to grow to hate me or think me insane, I was willing to do it," he whispered as he held her face in his hands.

"Patrick, I couldn't hate you. I understood that you were in pain. I just wanted to be there for you."

"But I can see now how much I hurt you and it makes me sick," he responded. "I never meant to cause you pain. That was the last thing I wanted."

Teresa couldn't stand to see him abusing himself like this. She reached up and pulled his head to hers and kissed him. It was a sweet tender kiss that went on for a couple minutes.

"We can't change the past, but we can learn from it," she said. "I know why you did what you did and do I wish you had let me in? Oh, yeah. But you weren't ready yet. I told you that I understand."

Patrick stepped back and stared down at the closed laptop. "It's just that when I see you singing, I can't help but see your pain and to know I caused that makes me wonder what you could ever see in my now."

She came to him and embraced him from behind. "God, you are the most foolish man I know sometimes. The singing was a release but it never reflected my constant emotions. I HAVE been happy over the last 12 years we've known each other. I loved knowing that you needed me, even if you didn't always know it yourself. I loved knowing that I was the one you would turn to and that I was the one you counted on when all else failed. You gave me the gift of your trust and I treasured it."

He turned around without breaking her embrace. "I have always trusted you and I have always cared. If I had known-"

"If you had known you would have walked away from me and we wouldn't be have this amazing relationship now," she interrupted. "We've both been hurt and we've both hurt each other, but it's all led to the present which I think is incredibly wonderful."

Patrick pulled her closer and kissed her. It was more passionate than her earlier kiss and filled with a need for her that she felt immediately and returned without reservation. He finally broke the kiss only to spread more kisses over her face and down her neck. She sighed deeply and stroked his back with her hands. He had to unbutton a couple buttons on her blouse to get to her shoulders and the tops of her breast. Her breath caught and she gasped, "Patrick!"

Deciding that she wasn't actively stopping him, he brought one hand up to caress her breast while his other gripped her bottom pulling her more tightly against him.

"Oh God, Teresa, I love you."

She was nibbling at his ear and throat as her hands found their way into his thick lush curls. She knew she should be the voice of reason since they were standing in a closet in the FBI building, but his touch and words had melted her- again. It was only when they heard two people greet each other and laughing together outside the door that they started to realize that this probably wasn't the best place to continue their current activity. With a groan they pulled back and started helping each other straighten clothes and smooth hair.

Resigned, Teresa picked up the sheet music and said, "I better meet Abbott before he decides to come find me."

Patrick nodded and picked up the laptop and followed her out the door. The two young agents in the hallway seemed surprised to see them coming out of the closet but only nodded at them as they went back towards the elevator. It might have surprised Lisbon and Jane to find out that they were considered a maverick partnership and most of the other agents outside their team were fascinated by them. Tales of their cases and the resolution of the Red John case had made them a bit legendary.

"Did you see that?" Barney asked Caroline in a whisper. "That was Teresa Lisbon and Patrick Jane! What do you suppose they were doing?"

Caroline who had seen the way Jane kept his hand on the small of Lisbon's back as the walked to the elevator whispered back, "Besides each other? I don't know, but I sure wish I had someone looking at me that way."

"Yeah," Barney agreed as they each walked away.

In the elevator Patrick continued to rub Teresa's back to relax her. "How are you feeling about the singing now?"

She smiled a little, "Well, I looked through the music and I'm going to try." She turned him and asked, "Do you want to sit in on the rehearsal?"

He seemed surprised, "Do you want me to?"

She thought for a second and nodded. "Yeah, I think it might help to have someone there to give me moral support."

Seeing that the elevator was almost to their floor he gave her a quick hard kiss just before the doors opened and said, "Always, my love. Always."

They walked into the conference room where Abbott was sitting at the piano playing. "There you are, Lisbon. I was afraid you had gone into hiding."

"No, sir, I just lost track of time," she replied as she walked to the piano. "So where do you want to start?"

Abbott looked at her and at Jane. He could see that Lisbon was feeling much better but that Jane was looking more concerned than earlier. Talking to Fischer earlier he knew that Jane had a flash drive made of Teresa's singing and that he had probably reviewed all of it. It must have been quite a shock to see. However, he decided that since the two of them seemed to be as close as ever, he would stay out of it.

Jane could tell that Abbott was wondering about his presence and said, "I hope you don't mind, but I told Lisbon I would stay and offer some moral support."

"As long as you don't act like a music critic, I have no problem," Abbott said with a short laugh.

Jane sat down in a chair next to the door as Lisbon hopped into a pub height chair that had been placed next to the small upright piano. She put the music on top of the piano and asked, "How do you want to work through this?"

Over the next few hours Abbott who would be known as Denny Abbs and Terri Lipton rehearsed and got to know the way each worked. They also shared a few laughs and developed a few jokes to tell between songs. Jane watched and found himself even more besotted with this astounding woman. He knew she was still fearful of pulling off the assignment but she was going to try as hard as she could and even if she doubted herself, he never would.

A couple of times during the afternoon, Jane stepped out and brought back bottles of water for his songbird, coffee for their boss, and tea for himself.

Once while he was in the break room he ran into Cho who was grabbing a cup of coffee and reading a file. "Hey, how's it going in there? Is she okay?"

Jane nodded while putting the bottle of water in his coat jacket and pouring tea for himself. He made a second cup with honey and lemon in the hope that he could convince Lisbon to have some to sooth her throat.

"She's okay. She's working on the music and putting together a routine," Jane replied. He looked at Cho and had to ask, "Did you have any idea that she sang?"

Cho shook his head. "No, man, I was as surprised as you. I doubt she told anybody."

Jane nodded again, "You're probably right. She's a private person and this was her outlet."

Cho genuinely like Jane. He secretly admired the way he had been willing to do whatever it took to avenge his wife and daughter and he had no problem with the outcome of the case. He also thought Jane was a great friend and had showed that even though he could torment his old CBI buddies, he also cared deeply about them. However, he couldn't help but be aware of the fact that sometimes Jane had been a self-serving and self-involved jerk not only to the team, but to Lisbon as well. Still, in the last six months, he had also realized that Jane must have been in love with Lisbon for a very long time, too. Therefore, today's news was probably pretty startling.

"Are you okay?" Cho asked not completely expecting a reply.

Jane stirred the tea and answered, "Sure. I guess I just wish I hadn't been such a bastard- especially to her."

Given the loving and honest way the couple were with each other now, Cho decided to let the guy off the hook a bit for his past. "Well, the important thing is that you know now."

Cho started to walk out the door but turned around to add, "Because if you had continued to treat her that bad, I would have to kill you and I learned from a former consultant just how to serve a dish a revenge."

Jane looked up at him and smiled. "Thank you. And believe me, you have my permission to do your worst if I ever screw this up."

About 8:30 that night, Abbott and Lisbon agreed to call it quits for the day and start again tomorrow. "I think you sound great, Lisbon, and I'm thinking that we're ready to let a few other people hear tomorrow. What do you think?"

She agreed, "We might as well get started acclimating to an audience. I don't want to face people for the first time at the Noted Lady."

"Good," Abbott said. "We'll ask the team to come in and make requests and act like club patrons. It should help everyone. Also, tomorrow morning Fischer is going to bring in some clothes for you to try on and complete the Terri Lipton look."

Lisbon groaned a bit but said, "Okay, but just know that I would be most comfortable in a T-shirt and jeans."

Abbott and Jane both laughed knowing that it was probably true. Jane, however, loved to see her dressed up and showing off her beautiful figure. "C'mon, sweetheart, I'll take you home."

Abbott watched the two leave and wondered again how it took them so long to find each other. It was obvious that they were meant to be together and no one would ever be able to break their bond.

That night they had a dinner of take out Chinese that they picked up on the way home and went to bed early. Once in bed, Patrick made it his mission to make sure that Teresa had a night free of worry. They played a duet that was in perfect harmony and when they were finally left breathing hard, with a light sheen of perspiration covering their bodies, a thoroughly satisfied Teresa slumped across Patrick's chest without a care in the world.

TBC