Doom and Gloom

Disclaimer: This is a work of Fan Fiction set within the Harry Potter universe. As such all Characters belong to J.K. Rowling and this work is not being produced for commercial gain.

A.N.

This work is A.U. I'm writing this one for fun, not worrying too much about either canon or geographic accuracy. If this bothers you I suggest relaxation exercises before sending a review.

1.

Alright, so here I am, in this rust bucket of a plane wondering how the hell I got here. Actually that's a lie. The memories of the events that lead up to me being on this thing are seared into my brain. Where to start? Ok the short version. I offed Voldemort, Tom Riddle, mouldypants call him what you will, but he was dead. Finally, totally, utterly dead, not sleeping, not pining for the fjords, but dead. Horcruxes destroyed, him destroyed, loyal followers either dead or in prison.

I don't know who was more surprised that I had won and was still alive, me or him. So in my head, it was time to kick back, enjoy life for a change and I don't know, have some fun. Up until then the most fun I'd had was flying a broom or a quick snog off Ginny Weasley. Not bad really but teenage kicks.

So in my head it was fun time, the thing is, I must have missed the circular because everyone else had a plan. Guess what? This plan didn't involve fun. Hermione insisted we just had to get our Newts. Dumbles, er yeah Dumble-boar was still alive. Must admit that was a bit of a shocker to me too. Excuse me, I saw you die. In front of me. Right there .Ak'ed off the tower, huge plummet, big splat. No I wasn't bloody traumatised, nor did I have nightmares about it, thank you for asking. Oh you didn't ask. I should just be happy you are back and you can help me to take the place in society you think I should have.

Worst of all was the Weasleys, I don't really want to go there but I guess I should in the interests of full disclosure. There was a plan there and wedding bells were heavily involved. Excuse me I'm seventeen, y'know? Life expectancy of well over a century more and I need to get married when and to who? I'd like to say Ginny's a nice girl and all, but that's, what do they call it? Oh yeah I remember, that's what we call a lie.

Ginny can be fun when she is getting her own way. Look, how can I put this? Ginny's way of resolving a family argument was the bat-bogey-hex. That was when she was eleven. Think about stuff she learned about during the pull-no-punches fight-to-the-death war. The nicest thing I can say about her, is red heads are passionate. That is a double-edged sword and boy does it cut.

Anyway, it looked as if somewhere the life and times of Harry James Potter was planned out and although no one had sent me a copy of the plan, the bits they had let slip didn't seem to be that much fun.

So what am I doing on this rust bucket, heading for Bolivia? I needed out. It turned out the only place I could get some freedom was out of the country. The thing is turns out Hermione might have been right. Newts would of helped. A resume that goes; Hey I'm Harry Potter. Dark Lord killer, doesn't get you as much prestige out of little-old insular Britton as you might think.

So cash was needed, or more cash was needed because getting the hell out of Britton and spending a year partying takes a lot of money, the skills I'd picked up in Horecrux hunting and Dark Lord offing went readily transferable to a lot of fields. However, I was offered this one job. I was to be part of the muscle for a team of curse breakers. Turns out sometimes, things just don't go right for them and suddenly finding yourself neck deep in zombies hinders the concentration. So a little extra training in something the Americans take for granted but I must admit I'd never even thought of. Although why had I never thought of it? Vernon had a gun licence. He made me oil the damn thing often enough. Turns out American wizards like their guns as much as their muggle counterparts. Also it's amazing what you can do with expandable charms. Hermione has her beaded bag. These guys have shell cases.

So here, I am on this rust bucket and there's some sort of disturbance at the bank of the plane. Brilliant understatement, Einstein. There is a mist rolling from the back of the plane towards us. Every person who the fog moves over, changes. Another understatement. Their skin colour changes to an unhealthy grey, a hey look at me I've been dead a year, grey. Any spark of intelligence seems to leave their eyes and they start attacking each other and everything. I'm slightly distracted by one ginger haired women, in bulging sweat pants, I guess the natives call them, she is really giving the window the fight of its life. She doesn't seem to care either that she leaving bits of flesh over it, as she beats at it.

The mist is only two rows away now. I turn to Megan next to me. Did I mention Megan? Hufflepuff House, the House of hard work and cooperation, also bad attitudes. I must admit I like it. Y'know after that presentation to the public by Kingsly there were witches in that crowd levitating knickers at me. Scared the life out of me at first, got to be honest, but once I left the Weasley household and Ginny's tender embrace, I must admit, I did partake in some remarkably short term relationships.

Morning conversations that went, 'what was your name again?' While some guys idea of fun, lost their appeal to me after a while. Megan here though, for all her good looks and she is good looking, raven black hair, perma-tanned complexion, nice full lips, decent curves. Well the full package is sexy as hell. She also comes fully equipped with a chip on her shoulder and dislike for me that she doesn't bother to hide. At some point, I might ask her why, but to me honest with you, I don't care. To be even more honest with you, I like it, after spending too much time with the fan club girls I find it refreshing.

So I turn to Megan and I say "Bubble head charm time"

Whatever she says to me and I can tell by the turn of the lips it's an insult, thankfully it's muffled by the bubblehead charm she is already wearing. She's smart too. House of Duffers? I'd like to put her in a room with Draco, I could sell tickets to that.

Right that damn mist is now almost reaching us. I hope like hell it only affects you when you breathe it in, not when it comes in contact with your skin.

Seems Megan's had the same idea. She's got her wand out and has conjured a wind that is blowing the mist away from of us. Good girl, that's one problem down. Now we have the problem of everyone who sat behind us on the plane and we did have the front seats, being turned into increasingly violent zombies and a new problem.

Y'know how they don't like mobile phones on planes? Turns out the electromagnetic fields do something to the planes electrics. Well something like that. I've been in the wizarding world these last few years. I know more than Arthur on this subject but some of the detail might have escaped me. So what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the new problem. Turns out that the electrics on a plane are really damn sensitive.

As the wind that Megan has conjured blows the fog away, all the cabin lights go out; simultaneously the plane takes a sharp lurch to the left. Megan and I keep our feet, but all our Zombie friends from the right of the plane stumble across to the left. Turns out the zombies on the left aren't receiving visitors today. They start ripped each other to shreds. Literally.

Y'know how some people talk? 'I literally died' no you didn't, because you are standing here talking to me. These zombies are literally tearing each other to shreds. When people fight, we tend to use fists, knees, elbows and feet. These former people. Ha, excuse me, we don't like the term zombie it has a negative connotation in today's multi ethnic society, we prefer the term, living-impaired.

Where was I? These zombies fight with teeth and fingernails. I saw one woman, ex woman, female zombie, call it what you will, use her long, formerly manicured finger nails to rip open the stomach of the guy she was standing next to. He didn't seem that bothered. As she was pulling out handfuls of his guts, he had her head in one hand, her shoulder in another and was biting chunks out of her neck.

Nice. The plane lurches again, this time it seemed to be going into a dive. The nearest zombie that was in the aisle lurches towards us.

Megan takes a step back and hits it with a Stupefy. This tells me a couple of things. Firstly, she's never been in a life and death situation before. Secondly, she's never been had to fight zombies. Thirdly, she hasn't learnt her lesson from the last time she used magic.

Stuff happens; the plane starts to drop like a stone. Megan turns white, which might be from the fact the plane seems to be in freefall or it might be from the fact her spell had no effect. The most important thing, is the thing that didn't happen. The zombie doesn't stop. He now reaches out for Megan. It's not as fast as a human but he moves faster than I want it to.

My Confringo hit it square in the chest. Nasty spell to use on a person. If I was feeling merciful I'd have hit it with a Reducto but seeing the damage these things are doing to each other without stopping I didn't want to take the chance. So the spell hits the zombie in the upper chest and removes it.

Not blows a hole in it or causes it to explode but removes, what is left of the zombie is the legs and lower stomach, the head and arms seem to float in the air for a second before gravity takes effect. What actually happened was the magical field held them aloft before it collapsed. The spell travels through two more of the zombies before dissipating. I spare Megan a glance, she's noisily throwing up next to me, thankfully she had enough sense to remove the bubble head charm. Tells me all I need to know about her combat experience. I can shut down my emotions when I chose.

I guess I have Vernon to thank for that. "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about." Was one of his favourite sayings. So when I need to I can just shut down everything bar my reactions. If you'd ever seen me play quidditch though you might have guessed that. Once I see the Snitch, that is it, I just follow and react. Hermione once made me watch an omnicular recorded she made of me flying. She was right, now ain't that a surprise, Hermione being right, but I have to be insane to fly like that. I promised her I'd take more care. Right up until I saw the Snitch in the next match I even meant it.

She has some theory about me, another surprise right, Hermione and her theories, she thinks I have a switch in my head that when circumstances press it I become a psychopath. That's the clinical assessment not the popular culture meaning. I don't go all axe crazy, it's just I stop feeling or feel less than a normal person, whatever the hell normal means when your referring to people. I've never met a normal one but that might just be the company I keep. Speaking of present company the zombie hoard is thankfully truly mindless. I've seen some that would react to a threat and attack. These ones are as happy to attack each other or bulkheads or seats or occasionally us.

Megan has stopped emptying out the contents of her stomach and is clutching the wall for balance. Yeah we are still dropping like a stone. I spare a glance out the window, the ground is coming up quickly. I point this out to Megan. Did I call her perma-tanned? Not at this moment. I've seen ghosts with more colour.

"Options?" I ask her.

Yeah I know terse but time is of the essence, and all.

Megan just looks at me blankly, oh well I guess she's had an attitude failure. It also means that it's up to me to come up with a plan. Thankfully coming up with insane plans in life and death situations has become something of a speciality of mine. Maybe I should put that on my resume below Dark Lord killer. Doing stuff no sane man would contemplate.

Between the passenger compartment and the cockpit on the left hand side is the stewardess area, on the right are the toilets. This is where I now drag Megan.

"Strengthen the walls." I tell her, thankfully, she doesn't debate the issue, she starts casting various charms on the walls of the toilet. I step into the toilet and start casting cushioning charms on the inside of the walls, plus the roof and floor. It doesn't take long. Which is good because I guess we don't have long.

I open up the door, grab Megan and pull her in. Apparently some people like to join the mile high club. Not that that is on my mind at the moment, but I'm kinda curious as to how. There's not a lot of space in here for two people. Although close physical contact is kind of an advantage in that pursuit. I can tell Megan isn't enjoying it though. Tough, next time we are on a plane plummeting to the ground she can come up with a plan. That assumes of course that we survive this time.

"Potter, move your hand"

Great we're plummeting to the ground on a plane full of zombies and she's worried about where my hand is. Talk about keeping a sense of perspective.

Correction, we have stopped plummeting.

We've hit.

Some sentences are easy to say. The plane crashed. Simple really, three words, only four syllables. Not as easy to explain what happened. The noise and the impact are simultaneous. Megan and I bounce of walls and floors. Thankfully, the hardest thing in here is Megan. I'm less thankful when I catch her head with my nose. We bounce around a bit I've given up trying to guess which way up is anymore. I'm not certain if it was the spinning around or the smack to the face but I'm feeling pretty dizzy. Seems the spell work did its job because I'm alive to complain about it. I look at Megan she's not looking so great, slightly green cast to her features from our wild ride and covered in blood. I must admit it takes me a moment to realise the blood is mine. Seems she made a mess of my nose. Oh well I've had worse.

After some time, we come to a stop. It's all subjective, definitely more than ten seconds less than an hour. Time tends to slow for me in these situations, that's how I can react so damn quick. Anyway we have come to a stop. What would have been the back wall of the plane has become the floor. My back is resting against it, I would be described to be in a sitting position if I wasn't on my back. What am I sitting on? We are in a toilet, so that should be obvious. Megan is lying on top of me her feet are slightly higher than her head. Now that we've stopped she is trying to use her arms to keep some distance to our bodies.

What was the door is now the roof. I'm a little reluctant to open it immediately. But that reluctance is starting to leave me as I feel water starting to seep into this box with us.

As this is only a problem and not yet a crisis I decide to give Megan some advance warning.

"I plan to open that door in a minute. Are you injured, or will you be able to get out on your own?" Always good to know where you are with the other persons abilities.

"I think I'm ok." She pauses slightly unsure of herself. "I'm having problem moving my foot but I think that is because there's no space in here."

"Alright here goes, when I open it you get up as quick as you can. I want to know if any of our fellow passengers survived the journey down. "

As close as we are to each other it's hard not to notice her eyes widen slightly in fear at that idea. It was a bit of a mean trick to play on her but the adrenaline I just caused to be added to her system will help to keep any pain at bay for the time being . I don't expect to see any live zombies after the plane crash. That's if live zombies isn't an oxymoron.

I take my wand and start slow. I cast alohmorow. Much to my surprise the door opens. Megan pushes herself up carefully. I'm grateful for that because a misplaced knee or elbow could do me a lot of injury at the moment.

She looks around and drops back down into the cubical with me. I can tell it's bad before she says a word. She isn't worried about keeping her distance and is pressed down hard against me.

"Zombies." She says. It amazing just how much emotion she can pack into one word. I nod my understanding and I motion her to move to her left, I move to mine and I have a gap to move into. Thankfully Megan can see what I'm doing so makes her movements match mine. In other circumstances I would be enjoying myself here. Have her move across me but there's nothing to rob the fun from a situation like zombies. We are now lying side by side and I can now get my head out of this cubicle. I cautiously raise my head and look around.

Ok first things first. We are in some sort of wetland area. The humidity that I hadn't taken much notice of hits me like a soggy brick. The cubicle is half on a streambed, half in the stream. The vegetation is a nice deep green. The trees are some species I don't recognise, but in my eyes they are damn strange. Kinda like pyramids at the base and growing nice and tall. Those that haven't been decapitated by the planes passage. But you'll have to excuse my general lack of interest in the local flora. I have more pressing concerns. Twenty feet away standing knee deep in the water is a zombie.

This guy seems different to the sky zombies. They were all mindless rage. This one seems to be, I don't know exactly but alert, aware of his surroundings. Very strange behaviour, from what I know of zombies. But as he seems to be on lookout I duck back into the cubicle to consult with Megan.

"I only saw the one. " I say without preamble. I know that she knows I'm not talking about trees. "Twenty feet downstream."

"What are we going to do?" it looks like it's down to me to make a plan then. Actually no.

"Well unless you get that spark of life and attitude back, it's everyman for themselves. I know I can survive this. I'm pretty certain we can get out of here alive but unless you get some desire back in you, you may as well give in now." I watch her intently she doesn't like what I'm saying but she still has no fight in here yet. "One thing though, if you are going to just going to give in and die, can I have a feel of your breasts."

"Try it and die Potter!" she snarls at me going for her wand.

I laugh, which probably isn't the wisest thing to do in the circumstances. "That's the Megan I need, keep that attitude and we both might make it out of here alive." She's just realised what I've done, her temper drops from a boil to a simmer. "Right then what do you think we should do? "

"My suggestion is take out our zombie friend and get out of here. Only thing is I have no plan as to where to go."

"Why don't we just apparate out from here?" It's a good question and I can tell her brain is now back in gear.

"Because I have no idea where we are. Even to which country we are in. I would guess that we are in a southern American state. Florida? Louisiana, maybe? With my grasp of geography and going on the plants I saw we could be just about anywhere. Now the places I know to apparate to are thousands of miles away. I'm attached to my legs and want to keep it that way."

As I said, Megan is not stupid, she saw my point almost immediately. "Right, if we need to do this on foot then we head towards the biggest section of the plane debris."

I nod to encourage her to continue.

"There is stuff in my bag that will help us survive out here."

Good she is thinking at last, so we've got the basis of a plan. Move, kill zombie, find luggage, move some more. I like simple plans, the more details you add the more tends to go wrong.

"I'll take out the zombie." This isn't exactly an offer. I want that thing dead, I saw her attempt on the plane, stupefy, ha. No, I want that thing put down as quickly as possible.

Once the decision is made I decide to act, no point thinking about it, that just leads to doubts and a thousand what ifs.

"Ready?"

She swallows to hide her nerves and nods. I push myself up as quickly as I can wand in hand and a spell on my lips.

That is when things start to go wrong. Our Zombie friend is looking straight at me this time, as I poke my head up. He raises his head and lets out a howl. My curse impacts it in the head and destroys it in a splash of blood and bone, the body topples backwoods like a felled tree.

What I'd like to say is everything goes quiet. Unfortunately I can hear more of those screams. They are coming from all directions.

"Come on Megan, time to move." I offer her my hand, but she ignores it and gets to her feet. She grimaces in pain as she does so.

We both climb out of our little cubical. I watch her carefully, it's obvious that she's hurt but she doesn't mention it, so I don't. We both look around us, the screams are getting closer but we can't see anything yet.

She points across to her left. "This way?"

I glance in the direction she is pointing. It's obvious from the damaged trees that this is the way we bounced in so that is the way we head out. I let her take the lead, she's limping and obviously in pain but she keeps moving. I'm constantly scanning around us. The foliage is too deep to see far but the screaming is getting closer to us all the time.

OK, cards on the table, time. My adrenaline levels are starting to spike and as they do a grin starts to creep across my face.

It takes a lot to do it these days, but I am an adrenaline junkie. I believe that is the term they use. The plane crash didn't set me off, the zombies on the plane didn't but here in a swamp with an injured, well let's say friend, surrounded by lots of zombies that are hunting us, that does it for me.

I use to get this thrill on a broom ride, then I faced a basilisk, then I got into fights with someone out to kill, that's my benchmark now. Nothing less than a group out to kill me gets me excited these days.

I glance back the way we have come and I see the first of the hunting party. They have found their decapitated friend. There is about ten in this first group and they have gone quiet. This is strangely disturbing after all the noise they were making. They turn as one towards us and start to move in our direction. I glance back at Megan who is stumbling forward on her bad leg and then I turn to watch the zombies.

This isn't good. They are moving faster than she is. I cast a wide angle cutter towards the zombies and run to catch up with Megan.

I hear the screaming start up again first behind me then echoed around us in the swamp.

"Brace yourself." I warn her. As I reach her, I grab her arm and dissaperate us away.

We reappear somewhat awkwardly as her ankle fails to take her weight. She stumbles into me and the next thing I know we are sitting in the dirt feeling kinda hurt.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're a blwdy idiot Potter?"

I shush her as I'm trying to listen to more important things than an irritable companion. Although I spare her a smirk, it amuses me how her accent comes out when she swears at me. I stand and close my eyes turning my head slowly side to side to better get a fix on the direction of it. I would guess it is behind us about half a mile away I can hear the howling.

That gives a reasonable margin of comfort .

"Stupefy."

My eyes snap open, standing in front of us is a zombie completely unaffected by the red light that has just hit it. Honestly, has this girl learnt nothing yet, stupefy is not going to do the trick here?

"Diffendo." I put a little too much effort into the spell. I can tell that as I cut a swath through the undergrowth. It does its job though as the zombie topples over. The legs just crumple sideways the top half falls backwards because of the impact of spell.

Thankfully grey and ghoulish never let out any noise, so we won't be expecting any immediate company.

"Accio Bags." Thankfully, magic is intent based so I don't get all the bags from the plane but mine and Megan's bags come swooping into where we are. She slowly rises from where she is sitting to check the contents.

I grab mine and remove the disillusion charms on the items in there. Then I get to work assembling the guns. It was simplicity itself to get them through customs wrapped in the invisibility cloak and floating above head height.

I prime the chamber and allow myself a little giggle. "Yeah baby let's dance."

A.N

Yeah unfinished. It's sat on my hard drive for 5 months now. I wrote the first three quarters in a day during a burst of enthusiasm that quickly dried up. Once I've come up with an explanation of where the zombies come from it might be continued.

Oh yeah inspired by the Rolling Stones song of the same name.