I leaned my dirty, grease covered overalls against the clean doorframe. Poe was deep in concentration, reading something in the air in front of him. I didn't have such cool tech screens in my workspace. Taking my time, I watched him work. His face went through so many expressions as he read his intel. But they all seemed to include the deep groove between his eyebrows. He always looked so intense, like everything constantly worried him. Finally, he sensed me in the doorway and looked up, the wrinkle getting deeper as he wondered about my presence.
"Working hard?" I lightly asked.
"Yeah." He pushed the read outs away and gestured for me to come in. "How are things in the repair world?"
"Normal. As long as you guys don't go off and get shot at, my job is fairly easy."
He didn't ask why I was there. Staring intently, his eyes looked me up and down. He could have used his hands and it would have felt the same to me. I felt weak and naked to him, but I didn't want him to see me as some quivering female. So I tried to at least stand up straight and look back.
"What's your real name?"
I choked a little as I tried to say it. It was almost unnatural to hear it out loud, I had been called Smiley for so long. "Kasey. But don't let anyone ever hear you call me that."
"Why not? It's not a secret, it's your name."
"It's just too personal. Only the people who were really close to me ever called me that. Like my mom when she was yelling at me."
He seemed to ponder that. We both remained still, eyes locked on one another, unable to look away. At least from my point of view that's what it felt like. I didn't want to stop looking at him, I wanted to memorize every feature, and I wanted to see him react to everything. I was in the middle of analyzing his hairline when he finally spoke and broke the spell.
"How does one get to be allowed to call you Kasey?"
I didn't know. "I don't know." Wow, how did that tiny voice come out of my mouth?
He noticed. His eyes softened and the crease between his eyebrows disappeared. I couldn't take a sympathetic response, so I changed the subject. "So, um, I wanted to know if I could have BB-8 help me out with a few things in the shop. If you're not going anywhere? And if you don't mind? I have some things that could go a lot quicker if she could talk directly to the ships for me."
Poe seemed to see straight through why I changed the subject. He sighed and gave me the hated sympathy look I was trying to avoid. Getting out of his chair, he walked to the doorway and put his hands softly on my shoulders. "Yes, you can have BB-8 for a while." His hands slid down my arms and stopped at my elbows. I wanted so much more at that moment, so I did what I had to.
"Thank you." And I walked away.