They never found her body.
Just her diary by the bed.
It told about the fight they had,
And the words that she had said.
When he told her he was ridin'.
She said then I don't give a damn,
If you never come back from Cheyenne.
"I feel mighty shitty goin' through her stuff." Shane mumbled, holding the diary. He looked up at Rick with a hollow, tired expression. They had been searching for Katie-Evelyn for three days.
"I know, but we gotta look at everything. I ain't exactly comfortable readin' her personal diary either. But maybe it will tell us somethin'." Rick suggested with a small shrug. The dark circles under his eyes made him look older. Shane sighed.
"All it talks about is them two fightin' 'bout him ridin' at the rodeo that night." Shane said quietly, regretting ever having to pick up her diary.
"Fight?" Rick asked, his eyebrows lifting slightly.
"Yea, says they had an argument. He told her his decision of ridin' was final, and she basically said she didn't care if he never came back... And he didn't... Bet that hit her pretty hard when she got the call that he wasn't." Shane said quietly.
"You know, she might've really killed herself. All that guilt, not wantin' to live without him... Ocean can rip a body through the under-toe and carry 'em pretty far." Rick said surely, but his voice was hollow.
"Prolly right, man." Shane said, and he set the diary back down in the exact spot he found it on her night stand. "Where do we go from here?"
"Keep her on the missin' person's list until her body turns up. If it ever does." Rick said, and the two men left the house, not ready to face the families again with the news of nothing.
"I won't do it! No fuckin' more!" Katie-Evelyn stormed back into the house. Daryl followed her.
"What you mean by that?" He snarled the question, grabbing her arm. She spun on her heels to face him, jerking away, anger burning in her blue eyes.
"Don't touch me!" She snarled. "I ain't gonna sit back and let you get ya self killed!" She yelled at him, the anger evident in her voice. "I've watched too many men fall out there and not get back up!"
"Ain't gonna get myself killed, woman! Ain't one of 'em!" He yelled back. "This is what I do! This is what I love!"
"Oh, so I give up what I love for you, but you can't for me!" Katie-Evelyn sneered at him.
"What?" Daryl looked at her as if she had just slapped him. "Don't even go there! You chose to stay here on ya goddamn own! I didn't make ya give up shit!" He yelled again.
"No! You didn't! But I did 'cause I knew it'd be toxic to our relationship. This shit, this bull ridin' bullshit, is toxic to our relationship!" Katie-Evelyn yelled.
"Only 'cause you make it!" Daryl growled, stepping closer to her. "This is my life."
"Exactly! Your life. What about us? Our life? I wanna have kids, ya know. How are we ever gonna have kids if you're too busy ridin' fuckin' bulls all your life? I ain't gonna have babies with you, if you keep ridin'. I won't do it! I won't start a family with you when there's a chance that your ass won't even be around to raise 'em!" She cried.
"Ya bein' over dramatic, Kate." Daryl laughed. "Look how long I've been ridin'! I ain't ever been hurt bad or nothin'! I never told you to quit dancin' 'cause I was 'fraid you'd break ya neck!"
"That is totally different, and you know it!" Katie-Evelyn shook her head. "You're so selfish, Daryl Dixon! You're the most selfish man I've ever known!"
"What? 'Cause I wanna do what I love? You still do ya damn fluff-fluff dance routines around the livin' room. With ya goddamn classical ballet bullshit music blarin' in my fuckin' ears! Do I say shit? NO!" Daryl yelled. Katie-Evelyn stared at him in disbelief.
"Really? Really?" She yelled. "I have to go watch you fuckin' ride bulls down at a goddamn rodeo. I gotta sit there and watch you get thrown around, never knowin' if ya gonna get killed right in front of me!"
"You knew! You knew this was me! It's what I do, Katie-Evelyn! Imma bull rider, an' you knew it when you married me! I'm not givin' up what I love. I love you, but I'm ridin'." Daryl said, and his voice was firm, harsh.
"Fine!" She yelled. "Then I don't give a damn if you never come back from Cheyenne." Katie-Evelyn had tears in her eyes as she turned on her heels, went into the bedroom, and slammed the door. Hard.
"Women!" Daryl huffed, and stormed out of the house. He stomped angrily down the stairs, and across the gravel to his motorcycle. Swinging his leg over, he sat down, and cranked it up. He looked up and expected to see her glaring at him through the window. But there was no one.
Daryl angrily shook his head, before turning the bike and leaving the yard. All of that was so stupid, and he hadn't realized it before, but he was shaking. His nerves were bad. He and Katie-Evelyn had never fought like that before. Petty arguements, but not like that. He sighed, as he rode away from the house. Away from her. Little did he know, she was watching him ride away out the window.