Spike sighed loudly as he lit another cigarette, his fourth for the night in under two hours. He rubbed his forehead with a claw and inhaled the tobacco, angry and very much disappointed with himself for what he had done, and how far he allowed it to become.

He wanted a drink, some alcohol in his system to numb his thought process. However, he forgot just where Twilight had hidden the wine. He looked over to her slumbering form, knowing she was still asleep after the exhausting but extremely magical night the two had, no doubt in bliss from Spike sharing his 'love' for her.

He wanted to be disgusted with himself, but he couldn't lie that he had enjoyed what they had done. Taking a longer puff of his nicotine, he exhaled it out his nose, flustered that he had enjoyed having sex with the one who raised him. Many said they were family, but he never believed that, and it was obvious by now that she did not as well.

He had no clue how he was supposed to break the news to Pinkie Pie. She was always so joyful, so carefree, so cheerful, to many assuming ponies, and without a thought in her head. He, though, had seen darker moments when he was around her. He knew the truth that she was wise, but doubted herself, that she was beautiful, but denied it and called herself ugly, that she was carefree, but kept up such a facade to entertain those around her.

She had told him of moments where she became so depressed, that she had once planned on killing herself, which honestly shocked Spike. Sometimes, she just wanted to get drunk in her room after an all-out party, but knew that she had to maintain her image of the innocent and random pink pony. Pinkie was not who many creatures would think she was, and it sadden him that she had never told anypony but him her darkest secrets. She gave him her heart, as far as he knew…and he broke it in half with his bare claws.

"What the BUCK is wrong with me? Why can't I just be happy with Pinkie? Why did I have to go so far as to cheat on her to realize why I loved her so much—why I love her still?" he growled to himself, inhaling another smoke. With a grunt, he knew he could not hold this off. He had to tell her…for the sake of their love together.

With a heavy sigh, Spike took one last breath of the half used cigarette and put it out on the gray ashtray. Getting up from his chair, he frowned as he saw Owlowiscious. The owl hooted in fear and flapped away from him to get back to work, resting on the counter and eating a mouse for his break. Spike knew what he did to the owl was completely unfair.

When he had gone to see what Spike and Twilight were doing this night, Spike, in an abrupt, angered mood, had blown a small stream of fire the bird's way. In his angered mood, he treated the poor avian with disrespect. Owlowiscious didn't deserve such cruel treatment. With a small smile, Spike hoped to make up for it later, promising to get the owl his food when the owl wasn't able to—not that it would help.

He quickly grabbed another cigarette and, knowing he would need it later, put it behind his left ear fin. Spike walked out of the library, making sure to be quite when closing the door so not to awake Twilight. The dragon knew from her, though, that Pinkie was still working the grave shift, which made the task so much harder.

The wind was cold, harsh, though Spike felt he deserved it. He wished he had gotten the brown jacket that Rarity had made for him a year ago on his birthday, and belittled himself for not remembering it. But compared to the heart break he was about to give Pinkie Pie, his punishment was very fair, knowing that even the Gods were against him this night.

Walking slowly, his mind blank as to what to say to his mate, Spike sighed. He neared Sugarcube Corner, feeling his heartbeat rapidly increase upon opening the entrance to the bakery. He saw Pinkie Pie, wiping the counters with a white dishrag, humming to herself happily. Her cheerful mood, despite working a shift she despised, crushed Spike's soul.

The pink furred mare looked up, not expecting to see a customer this later at night. She was surprised, but overjoyed to see Spike enter. She smiled and waved a hoof at him. Noticing he waved back weakly, she felt confused. What could be troubling him, and why did he looked so depressed?

"Spike-y, I'm so glad you came, baby! I've been wanting to see you, but I had to work an extra shift 'cause I'm trying to save up enough bits to help my Granny Pie get a new kidney. I'm super sorry I wasn't there when you got out. I only had a ten minute break, and the prison is sssssooooo far from Sugarcube Corner. Can you forgive me?" she pouted, discarding the rag and bouncing towards him. She wrapped her forehooves around him, giving him a breathtaking kiss. Pinkie scrunched her nose from the smell of tobacco on his lips, but her smile was wide as she pulled back to breathe.

Spike, seeing the mare of his heart asking for forgiveness for something she couldn't control, caused him to freeze in his tracks. He accepted the kiss halfheartedly. The dragon allowed his heart to beat so loud, it was all he could hear, therefore only understanding half of her words.

He frowned. The pink maned pony felt that Spike had something serious weighing on him and wanted to know just what it was that was eating at her mate.

"Spike, are you okay, Hun? What's wrong?" she asked, hugging his body tightly before kissing him.

His body went stiff and the words on his tongue to turn to ash. He swallowed and cleared his throat. Pushing the pony away from him, he looked deep into her loving, nonjudgmental blue eyes.

Spike inhaled sharply, exhaling with all the air his lungs could allow. He gently took Pinkie's hooves in his claws and wanted so bad to kiss her. But he knew he couldn't, not after the sin he had dared to commit. It would have been a sick, cruel joke if he did, and he would kill himself before he allowed anypony else to tell her what he had done before he himself had a chance to. He need to tell her; it could wait no longer.

"P…Pinkie, we need to talk," he said quietly.

She blinked, worry in her eyes, not understanding why he was so serious. Knowing that what he had to say would no doubt change both of their lives, based from the tone he had said it. Was he breaking up with her? Had she done something that he was displeased of and no longer wanted to be her friend? Had he committed some type of crime again that would lock him away from her forever? She had to know, and she hated to be kept waiting.

"What it is, Spike?" she asked.

He closed his eyes, not having the heart to look her in the eyes while saying the words he knew would end their relationship.

"Pinkamena Diane Pie, I…I have to tell you," he hesitated, having no idea how he could possible say what he had to say next.

Pinkie's eyes widen; he only spoke her full name when he was serious. She awaited with bated breath as he continued, with a chained heart, "I…I cheated on you," he whispered, and all of time around them seemed to stop.

Pinkie blinked, her cheer, her love and her trust shattering right before Spike's eyes. She frowned, then dropped to all four hooves. The pony took two steps back, no words able to form. This was no prank, and she knew that; she knew what pranks were, being the Party Mare. She sat on her rear, her mane and tail slowly losing its poofy curls that made the pony who she was.

"Why?" she whispered to him.

Spike opend his eyes and looked to the ground, hearing the mare repeat herself. He felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest by Nightmare Moon, a shiver running down his spine before he could answer her.

"I…it was a mistake, Pinks, I swear. I…I honestly never meant for it to happen. What Twi-"

"You cheated on me with Twilight?" Her words were icy cold, sending another shiver down his spine.

He exhaled through his nose, and looking into her eyes, nodded. "Pinkie, what Twilight and I didn't mean a thing, I swear. It just happened so fast, next thing I knew, we-"

"You...bucked her?" she whispered, her voice changing from cold and cruel to a bit of anger. He heard it in her tone, knowing that she was serious.

He curled his claws and nodded, watching as her mane and tail become completely straight. He now felt even more depressed. "Yeah….we bucked, but I mean it, Pinkie Pie, it doesn't mean anything-"

"Do you love her?"

Her words sliced his own from his throat like a knife. His eye widened that she would think he would do such betrayal if he loved Twilight.

"No, no Pinkie, I don't. It…it was just a one-time thing. We never even meant for it to go so far, I-"

"You promise…as if the shit filled words coming from your mouth would make any difference to me, reptile," she hissed, her voice filled with venom he had never seen in her. She narrowed her eyes as her nostrils flared.

Looking him in the eyes, she gave him no chance to look away. His next words were dying on his tongue before he could so much as blink, seeing she was getting angry—an anger he had not seen for such a long time, since her sisters had disowned her two years ago.

"Pinks, please, just listen. What I did is no excuse from how much I regret-"

"Get out of my shop," she uttered monotonously, her gaze going from his face to the ground. Her front hooves shook with barely contained rage.

Spike dug the tip of his claws deeper into his palms, only he felt no pain. He sighed loudly, a sigh filled with shame, guilt and heartbreak. The drake gritted his fangs, feeling his anger begin to rise within him, but he couldn't control it.

"If you can just let me explain the situation, Pinkie, we can-"

"GET THE BUCK OUT OF MY BAKERY, YOU...YOU BASTARD!" she screamed.

He jumped two inches into the air. Spike never heard Pinkie Pie utter such a word before, even in her darkest moments. Now she was screaming in his face, eyes filled with such fury. His eyes widened in shock, not knowing what he was to do next.

The mare stood from the floor, slowly turning away from him. Spike took the two steps towards her. He put his claw on her right shoulder, trying to get her to understand and rid himself of the sin he had done to her.

"Pinkie Pie-"

His words were interrupted harshly as he felt a firm, hard crusted left hoof slam into his right cheek. All of Pinkie's hate and anger, as well as betrayal, was put into the blow, forcing Spike's body to stumble back, holding the bruised injury. His mouth opened in shock that the mare would have ever resorted to violence.

Pinkie's face was streaked with tears. It hurt Spike more than any physical attack ever could; seeing the mare so sad made Spike want to drown himself into a river.

She turned her head away from him, the burning liquid dripping onto the floor as sobs raked her body. Spike took a step towards her to comfort her, but she held up a hoof to stop him.

"You're fired…don't you dare come near me or Sugarcube Corner right now. I—just... get the buck out of my face. We're over," she whispered, her voice emotionless.

Spike's mouth was open in shock, but he shut it again. He felt tears on the edge of his own eyes. "Pinkie, I promise-"

"I don't want anything to do with you right now…you're dead to me," she hissed. She slowly trotted away from him, walking up the stairs with her tail dragging behind her.

Spike wanted to tell her to come back, to tell her he was sorry. However, he knew she would think his honest words were hollow, fake…just like she believed of him entirely.

Rubbing his bruised cheek, Spike closed his eyes, and with a tragic sigh, he walked out of the bakery and slowly processing what happened. He had lost his second job, in which he was having up the bits to take her to a very expensive restaurant, and was even considering a golden engagement hoof 'ring.' Not only that, but he also lost the mare he thought held his heart. He bucked up, in an unforgiving way, and no doubt even the Gods of Equestria were against him now.

Spike walked, his legs on auto pilot as he walked to wherever they carried him. Tears ran down his face. He knew that what Pinkie Pie said to him was serious. She was done with him. He didn't even bother to wipe the tears from his face. Then he heard a noise to the right of him.

Glancing that way, he saw a light gray furred unicorn with a light yellow mane and tail, golden eyes, and a Cutie Mark of three small crosses. She was dragging two trash bags out behind her, encasing the bags in a golden glow. Spike felt as though the mare was familiar.

She walked out of the building. Spike looked up to see he was at Ponyville hospital. His breath caught in his throat as he watched the unicorn throw the black bags filled with trash away into the dumpster.

"Dinky…hey, Dinky Doo?" he called out.

The mare turned, blinking when she saw Spike.

And Spike saw it truly was his old best friend. Dinky frowned, unsure what her old friend was doing near the hospital, not seeing any injuries on his body and no sign of anypony else near him. Her eyes narrowed, and she took three steps to see him better in the moonlight.

"Spike, what are you doing here?" Her voice was harsh, devoid of the usual warmth it had years ago when they were children.

"I...I'm out for a walk," he answered sadly. Looking towards the ground, his claws curled as he sighed loudly.

Dinky stared at him, her features softening. She knew something was really tearing him apart due to his low tone.

"W…would you like to come inside? I get off in twenty minutes," she replied.

He only shook his head, grabbing the much needed cigarette from his left ear fin and lighting the tip. He took a deep breath before blowing out the gray cloud of smoke.

"I'm good. I won't stay for long anyway…smoke?" he offered.

She grimaced and shook her head. He shrugged and sighed again, taking another drag and exhaling out his mouth. The silence between them was becoming awkward.

She shuffled her hooves, looking away from him. "Do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

He paused, not sure if he wanted to tell anypony what just happened between him and his…former mate.

But Spike knew Dinky; she was as loyal as Rainbow Dash and as honest as Applejack. Spike bet that if the two mares did not have those elements, then they would have no doubt been given to Dinky—both of them.

He chuckled from the thought, taking another drag. With a heavy breath, he walked closer to her, sitting down on the grass. Dinky had no other choice but to join him. The unicorn looked back at the hospital, sighed and sat beside him.

Spike wiped his tears away from his face before confessing everything to her. He gave her every detail, from getting arrested, to sleeping with Twilight to talking with Pinkie Pie. He did not see her expression, his eyes on the grass in front of him. A long silence between the two of them once Spike finished with his story.

Dinky frowned and blinked down. She wanted to choose her words carefully before speaking, as her sister, Derpy Hooves, taught her.

"Spike, why did you bother to even give in to such a dark urge, if you knew it would ruin your relationship with Pinkie Pie?" she asked softly, no tone of disgust or judgment in her voice.

He sighed, breathing in another drag of his cigarette before replying.

"It…I lost focus of the mare I loved—and still do. I ignored the consequences of what would happen when going from a kiss. I allowed myself to give in to a sexual act with my best friend. I broke my mate's heart just to fill my own sexual needs with another mare," he whispered. He had no excuses or lies.

Dinky give him a grim smile, knowing that he would never lie to her. If there was one creature he knew he could always go to for emotional needs, it was Dinky Doo.

"Right, this is your fault Spike, these are your problems. Nopony else is to blame but you, and you need to take account for what you had done. Can't blame Twilight for giving in to her heart anymore then you could for Pinkie Pie breaking up with you, now, can you?" she said to him with calmness. She was blunt, but it was what he really needed to hear.

He knew she would never hold her tongue for anypony, in which he was glad for her honesty. "You're right, Dinks…it is my fault. I gave into my urges and couldn't control myself. And I'm punished for what I did. I don't deserve Pinkie," Spike growled to himself, putting his claws over his temples and closing his eyes tightly.

Dinky scowled before she looked away, knowing this was no easy talk that would just go away with some halfhearted words.

Spike took one last puff of his cigarette, inhaling it to the end of its point. He watched the cloud drift from his mouth to the star filled sky and disappear, tossing the remains away from him,. He sighed, ignoring Dinky's angered glare.

"Will she ever forgive me?" he questioned.

The mare's face fell. She softly shook her head with a wave of her hoof. "That's honestly up to Pinkie Pie. As for Twilight, it seems as though she really loves you. But you can't just mindlessly buck her and-"

"I didn't. It was a one night stand; at least, that's how I see it. I…we didn't just have mindless sex. We were making love," Spike told her.

Her eyes widened in surprise, and she sucked in a breath. "Then Twilight loves you. Pinkie…right now, not so much. You can't just wait this out, Spike. Eventually, they'll both die, and you'll never get the chance to tell them you're sorry. You're a dragon. You have time that we will never have; don't wait or else it's too late," she replied.

He looked at his claws, opening and closing them slowly before swishing his tail, thinking carefully of her sagely words. "I won't...I promise," he said gently.

She gave him a smile and stood up. Stretching her tired limbs and flickering her tail, she took a few steps away from the drake. Spike had not moved from his spot.

"What happened to us, Dinks?" he asked slowly, as if he expected her to walk away from him if he got up.

Dinky paused before she answered, "You got into a fight with Rumble, my stallionfriend, and stormed out of the clubhouse right before Pipsqueak got his Cutie Mark, three years ago. You know, you put Rumble into the hospital with all you did to him. All you got was a broken left arm, but he…he was a mess Spike," said Dinky flatly. She tried to keep the anger out of her voice.

Spike looked up and into her eyes, remembering the events that had taken place. He closed his eyes and burrowing his head into his chest.

"I never meant to hurt him. I just didn't like his comment about my species," he defended himself.

The unicorn glared at him before he held up his claws. "But he forgave me…eventually. I never meant to hurt you either, Dinks. You're my best friend," he added.

Her smile returned, and swishing her tail in front of his face, she chuckled.

"And you're mine, Scales. Just don't try to get into a fight with my mate anymore, alright?" She smirked.

He nodded with a small smile. "I want us to be friends again, Dinky. Though the rest of the CMC still hate me," Spike said quietly.

She let out a loud sigh. "Then let them. You're a tough reptile for your age, Spike. You'll bounce back. Though I'd be lying if I said that I did not miss my best bud." She laughed.

He laughed back, for the first time since the break up. Then, however, her face became serious.

"I'm always here for you if you need me, Spike, you know that. But with this whole Twilight and Pinkie thing: don't use your mouth, don't use your brain. Use your heart; that's what my mom taught me. Does the heart lie? Well...sometimes, but I think every creature could use a lie or two every once in a while. And with you, it'll be the only thing you have when things get tough," she said.

This made him nod, putting a claw to his right cheek . He felt her trot away from him.

"We'll hang out more, dragon boy, swear it. But now, I gotta go tell my supervisor that I'm late from taking out the trash. Remember, Spike: follow your heart," she repeated with a smirk. She walked away, leaving the reptile to his thoughts.

He was surrounded by shadows that held dark, dangerous shapes to the dragon. But he ignored them, looking into the stars above for the answer to his question, his heart torn in two.

"Luna, how am I supposed to figure this out and make things right?" he questioned slowly.

He felt a faint breeze behind him. He turned his head to see the mare herself, a grave expression on her face. She sighed.

"There are some questions that cannot be answered, Spike…not even by the Gods. Your friend is right. Go after your heart. For in this quest, it is the only weapon that can decide your true future, but know that I, as well as my sister, will be watching over you. We have not forsaken you, mortal. But this is one journey you must walk alone. I am sorry," she answered to him, bowing her head. With her mane, eyes and tail glowing, she vanished from his sight into the night sky.

Spike scowled, not feeling as though she helped as much as he wished she would have. He got up from the ground, getting rid of the tiredness from his limbs and tail. He kicked a rock near him, watching it skid into darkness before he sighed and walked slowly from the hospital. He knew that, even through everything, he still was alone in this 'journey,' as Luna had said, traveling a road that apparently no creature could walk with him, not even the Gods.

Author's Note: Wow...this was cruel of me to write, but it needed to be done. Don't think I have a line I won't cross when it comes to dark writing...or at least hopefully not one that my editor won't aid me with, LOL. Poor Pinkie, but this is real...this is how some tragic heart break happens, no? Shit...this is getting intense, the next chapter though, yeah the next you'll want to be perpared for. It's going to be a wild ride.