Chapter 4 Truth and Consequences

She'd only had a few minutes to regret the decision before Jacob pulled her into a dark cave that lay just off the beach. It was one Renesmee had never seen before despite her frequent beach excursions. The opening had been somewhat hidden under the thick cover of ivy brambles and moss. If her sense of direction was correct and it was rarely wrong they were almost directly underneath the cliff they'd just stood on. The warmth faded from her hand as Jacob pulled his away to search for something.

"I know it's here somewhere" he said absently. Renesmee stood at just inside the mouth of the cave feeling awkward. She rubbed at her palm where their hands had joined. It was still tingling. Odd Renesmee thought to herself with a frown. "Ahh here it is" the sound of a match striking rock brought a small fire to light. In its glow she could just see Jacob's grinning face. He held it cupped in his hand so the wind wouldn't blow it out and lit a torch hanging from the wall. In awe Renesmee watched him light the others that looked as if someone had fashioned those years before. As the inside of the cave came to light piece by piece she could see there was a small, rickety looking desk in the far corner. On it were mounds of melted wax from candles long flickered out, a few books including a tale Renesmee had been quite fond of as a child and what looked to be a set of wood carving tools. What she failed to see was Jacob quickly swiping down a picture taken of the two of them shortly before he'd left. No need to confuse her any more than she already is he thought regretfully. There was a fire pit in the center with charred wood covered in charcoal dust that must have been blown around in the years it had been abandoned. A makeshift bench sat in front of the pit still looking sturdy enough to sit on. Renesmee narrowed her eyes at the stone bench as a memory flickered before her. It was of herself sitting there hardly more than a child reading the book that was now covered in dust atop a rickety old desk.

"I've been here before" she said wide eyed and gaping. Her voice echoed hollowly against the cave walls. Jacob could see her struggling to bring back more memories and hoped that maybe bringing her here had been the right move.

"You were" Jacob replied simply. "Seems like a lifetime ago now, but yeah, we used to come here together" He pushed the framed photograph further under the rug he was knelt on and reached for some fresh wood.

"Together" she echoed. "I don't remember you. That's never happened to me before. Never" frustration laced through her every word. "It's like there's a piece of my life just…missing" she lifted her hands and dropped them with a sigh.

"Well Nessie…umm I mean Renesmee. I guess I'll just have to start from scratch and earn your love all over again" he winced when her eyebrows shot up at the word "love" "Friendship…I meant win your friendship" his correction had her chuckling softly. The smile breaking across her face was like a bandage on his broken heart. Jacob had thought it impossible for her to be even lovelier but when she smiled she was simply breathtaking. Renesmee began to relax fractionally. The whole place felt familiar, the dark, muscular guy in front of her seemed familiar. She knew she was well out of her comfort zone now. It was the first time in her life that she couldn't figure out everything she needed to know about a person from just one touch. He was a mystery to her wrapped in one hell of a hot package. Renesmee still felt young enough to be drawn to the darkness, the danger of it all. She watched as he built a fire with rippling muscles showing from under his wet t-shirt. He was bigger than most of the other Quiluetes she'd met, taller and broader and definitely more cocky. She had become accustomed to their strained friendship with her family some of them were downright hostile on times but Jacob's confidence with her, his utter lack of fear was alluring. She watched with appreciation as he slipped the sopping shirt over his wet hair and could have melted into a puddle when he smiled at her before going back to stacking kindling. It was insane Renesmee thought to feel so drawn to him but she was inexplicably. Even his smell which normally repelled her from the wolves was inviting. He smelled like the musky, damp sort of earthy smell that came with the dawn of spring. Renesmee began to wander the limited area the cave provided. She went to the desk running her fingers over the dusty cover of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and opened it to the first page. There she found an inscription written at the very top of the page.

"For my sweet Nessie, I know you'll enjoy this one,

Eternally, Jacob"

Her fingers danced over his written words and still nothing came to her. Frustrated she shut the book with a snap and resigned herself to the simple fact that she would just have to figure it out on her own. Behind her were the sounds of a fire snapping to life. Jacob looked up from the fire to see her looking at the book he'd given her for technically her third birthday. He and Edward had argued that day he remembered with irritation. Deliberately pushing back his anger he decided he's put that moment away. He wouldn't think of it tonight when Mother Nature seemed to be granting him a chance and he was determined not to waste it. She was a vision standing over the rickety desk, her hair falling in wet ringlets over a face that was deep in concentration. Jacob ran his fingers through his spiky hair, shaking droplets onto the cave floor.

"Come sit by the fire, Renesmee. Get dry" he said with concern. She turned with a little grin on her pretty face.

"Afraid I'll catch cold?" she mocked. "…and you can call me Ness" Jacob felt his mouth go dry as she started to unbutton the white shirt she wore. He nearly gulped before realizing she wore something underneath. It was a pretty little tank top with white lace and a small bloodstain. The girl had always been a messy eater. The thin material clung to her like a second skin leaving nothing to the imagination. He noted with not one ounce of regret that the little Nessie he'd left behind had grown in more ways than one. Edward would surely kill him for what he was thinking now. "Tell me something" she asked as she sat down on the stone bench next to him. Anything, everything he thought before snapping back to attention. "What's her name?"

"Who?" Jacob answered taken aback.

"The girl you left. What's her name?" Renesmee kicked a pebble into the fire absently. She was curious to know who it was that had put the shadows in his eyes.

"Oh…straight to the point" He could hardly tell her the truth this early on and struggled for an answer, any answer that would make sense but just couldn't lie to her. "You may not like the answer" he said carefully. She looked up studying his chiseled face. Firelight danced in her dark bronzed eyes and he knew he could deny her nothing. She reached up slowly and touched his cheek to swipe a raindrop away and was surprised when his hand came up to cover hers affectionately. It was insane, ludicrous she thought but his hand felt just right there with hers. She pulled hers away quickly letting the droplet of water fall off on its own. Out of the corner of her eyes she spied a pointy wooden object protruding out from under the rug. He saw her go for it and closed his eyes knowing it was over now. She would know everything and she would run.

"What's this?" She teased plucking the wooden frame out. "I bet she's in this picture or else…or else why would you keep it here so long…" She trailed off as she looked down at the picture of the two of them smiling at one another. He wasn't just smiling at her Renesmee thought staring at the photo with intensity. The moment forever captured was of a man completely besotted with the little girl holding his cheeks. The gleam in his eyes was exactly like the look Edward often had for her mother. Both of them were completely fixed on whatever she must have been showing him at the time. For once in her short life Renesmee had no words. She knelt on the rug waiting for him to deny it.

Jacob's breath came out in a resigned sigh as he knelt in front of her on the rug almost mirroring the pose in the photograph.

"I didn't want you to find out like this" he said calmly. "I never thought for a second you wouldn't remember me" he held out his hands and she placed the frame in them.

"What did you expect?" she said heatedly. Now she was frightened but not of any danger. The fear was in the possibility, no matter how small that he did love her, that he'd come back for her. "If we were this close why would you leave me, Jacob?" They were too close right now was all she could think. The rug was just too small with the both of them kneeling within a foot of each other.

"…Because you deserved a choice. I knew that if I stayed the whole imprinting think would get in the way and I was afraid you'd feel obligated to love me back" he answered with the keen edge of pain. Either way Renesmee knew now that she was the cause of his pain either way.

"Imprinting; you mean I'm your imprint? You imprinted on me" she declared as if it was completely insane. Perhaps it was, Jacob thought but what choice did he have. The whole truth would have to come out now.

"When you were born" he answered softly. "It doesn't mean anything Ness. I'll go again. Let you and whatever his name is live your lives in peace" Oh yeah he thought darkly when she started giggling twist the knife.

"Talan?" she laughed and thought better of it when she saw how seriously sad Jacob looked. "We aren't together. I mean he wants us to be but, I'm not sure I do" She hoped that would ease the darkness in his eyes. It was both wondrous and strange to see that she could have that effect on another living soul. She didn't know why all this had happened and the timing was certainly a little cosmic but she knew she wanted to follow this path wherever it led her. She owed it to the happy little child in that photograph. With the dark god in front of her leading the way it couldn't be all that bad, could it.

"So, it's like Quil with Claire right?" she asked in an attempt to lighten the conversation. Jacob looked up to search her eyes and found nothing but acceptance and curiosity in them. The girl was so much like her mother it was scary. Like Bella, she was too stubborn and accepting for her own good.

"Something like that" he replied a grin finally breaking across his face. He felt giddy inside. It was a feeling he hadn't known in years. Right now he didn't care where it was leading. He knew it was reckless, knew that pursuing her could lead him into heartbreak but he didn't care. He'd been heartbroken before and he could do it again if need be but he had to try. "Is it like amnesia? I mean…has this ever happened to you before?" he asked in a concerned voice.

"Never" she whispered wondering what it would be like to kiss him. Since Talan had kissed her earlier all she could think about was that she had absolutely nothing to compare it to. She found herself fixatedly staring at his lips and then a wayward thought broke her stare. "I don't understand why there are no more pictures of us in the albums. I know Alice took hundreds of pictures of me. There are dozens of books full of them and you aren't in any of them" she pondered her mouth pursing in concentration.

Jacob's face fell back into a scowl.

"Oh, I'd wager I know what happened to them" he declared with a growl that rivaled the winds raging outside.

"I guess my family isn't all that fond of you" Renesmee reached out to touch his hand in a gesture that was meant to soothe. "Alice probably took them out of the books so I wouldn't be upset" she said quietly. "They treat me like I'm fragile, like I might break any second; I'm not" the words shot out of her mouth before she could stop them. She hadn't meant to reveal so much in such a short time.

"No" he answered calmer with the feel of her hand reluctantly touching his. "You are one of the toughest half-vampire girls I ever met, you always were" She laughed. It was a deep laugh that managed to be husky and cute all at once. It suited her.

"I'm the only half-vampire girl you know" she teased. It felt insanely right to be in the presence of someone who didn't feel like she was in need of constant protection. Still stroking his hand she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek just to test what it would feel like, if it would bring back any memories. It didn't but her hard lips on his feverish skin felt nice anyway. She was practically sitting In his lap now as she pulled back to see his reaction to the chaste kiss and saw his eyes had gone dark. There was control there Renesmee saw it but it was mixed with need. It was a dangerous combination. She was playing with fire and desperately wanted to get burned. He reached a hand up to tuck a wayward tendril of hair behind her ear. Little stars dangled from the lobes. Jacob leaned in, his mouth a mere breath away from hers. Renesmee exhaled sharply her breath drifting over his face. It was the same sweet smell he remembered but so much more potent now than it had ever been. Her eyes closed in anticipation dark lashes like tiny ribbons against porcelain skin. Jacob had only to move another inch and his lips would be on hers.