Chapter 4

Understanding in the Snow

Christmas Day came with the chimes of a clock, but only one person was awake to hear them. She was sitting on the couch and facing the fireplace while her thin fingers played with the locket around her neck.

Rick had insisted that she stay the night and as the dinner and everything ran far into the night she didn't put up much a fight, but she couldn't sleep. He had tried to give up his bed but she wouldn't let him. They argued gently about it for what must've been ten minutes until Martha broke it up and Kate won.

The couch wasn't uncomfortable and she was warm and tired, but still sleep did not come. She couldn't shut her mind down enough to let her drift off to sleep, and she didn't think she would be able to anytime soon.

Rick. He had a way of disarming her and knowing her. This gift was perfect and he had obviously put a lot of thought into what to get her. She couldn't think of anyone who would get her something like this, but then again Rick had got further into her past life than anyone really before. Why was that? Why did she open up to him when she knew he would use it in his stupid books?

She sighed and looked down at the pictures of her parents. His books weren't stupid, she loved them, even the Nikki Heat ones. Sure, somethings were a little much and she wished he didn't write about the characters having sex so much, but they were still good; made better by the fact that Nikki was based on her. Plus, they allowed her to get close to Rick. Close to her favorite author and now they were partners and friends, maybe even great friends. He had always put himself out there for her, always a phone call away.

He had saved her life more times then she could count, and she had saved his just as many. They always teased each other, and she knew at times she was just down right mean to him, and yet he still stuck around. He still wanted to be around her all the time. Still, she'd assumed too much before and was burned by it. She would not make the same mistake twice, but she couldn't help but allow herself to hope that he might actually have feelings for her. That one day it might all work out.

It was Christmas after all, the time for wishes. She had gotten her wish, hadn't she? She wasn't alone on Christmas Eve, at least not all of it. She was right now, but that was okay, everyone else was asleep and she had work tomorrow. After that, Christmas would be over and she wouldn't have to think about it all.

"Hey," She turned at the voice and found a sleepy looking Rick who stood at the end of the couch. He was dressed in black sweatpants and a green sweatshirt. His hair was a mess and she found herself thinking he looked awfully cute, much more so than the picture in the bar. She wouldn't tell him that of course. He already had a big enough ego.

"Hey," she said slowly and sat up.

"Waiting for Santa? I hear he doesn't come until all good little girls and boys are asleep." He sat down next to her, a little too close than she'd normally allow and yet she didn't mind.

"Then he should be here soon."

"Not with you awake."

"I'm not as good as you think, Castle."

He laughed. "Maybe. So, why are you still up?"

"Couldn't sleep, just too much on my mind." She said, still playing with the locket.

"Penny for your thoughts? Or how about a nickel? I think I have nickel." He said and dug into the pockets of his sweatpants. "Ah, there's that smile I was missing."

She reeled the smile in and looked back to the fire. Her eyes caught sight of the fourth stocking that hung on the mantle. It was still folded and hid the name from her. She needed to know who it was for. She turned back to Rick to find him watching her with an amused expression.

"Castle, who's the fourth stocking for?"

"What?" He furrowed his brow and she pointed to the mantle. His eyes scanned over it for a moment before a look of understanding crossed his face. "Oh! Right, forgot to mention that."

"So who is it for?"

"You."

"What?" She said, taken aback by the idea. He hung a stocking for her and he didn't even know she would show. "What do you mean me?"

"I mean it's your stocking here. Look," he stood and walked to the fireplace, her eyes following him, and unfolded it to show Kate written in a flowery hand. "I thought it'd be nice for you to have a stocking to open tomorrow with everyone else. And if you didn't stay I was going to bring it by the station tomorrow and give it to you."

"Why?"

"Why what?" He asked letting the stocking fall back and made his way back to the couch.

"Why did you want me to stay, why did you wish I would come over for dinner? Why the gift and the stocking?" She said it all very quickly and then added after taking a deep breath, "Why did you say I'm important to you?"

"Because you are? Kate don't you see that you're important to me? Working with you had stopped being about the books a long time ago. I love working with you, I love being around you. You make my day better, I could be having one of the worst days ever and yet when I see you, when I ask for advice from you... it somehow makes it better. I know I cause more problems for you and that you wish I wasn't around sometimes, but I'm grateful you keep me on the case so to speak."

"You did," she said slowly. "Well, you use to bother me, but not for a long time now."

"I'm glad to hear that." He said and sat down. "But is that all that was on your mind?"

She shook her head. "Not really, the holidays are usually sort of lonely, and... I'm reminded about my mom a lot."

Rick sighed beside her and placed a hand on her knee. She was surprised but didn't move away. His eyes were distant for a moment as he looked at the the wall, half his face aglow from the flames from the fireplace. "Yeah, I think I know a bit of the feeling."

She cursed in her head. She had forgotten that he never knew his dad. Of course the holidays would be harsh for him in a bit of the same way they were for her. A time for family, where part of your family was missing. She reached down and took his hand in hers and moved into him a bit. She wanted the contact, something that was real and important.

"Sorry," she said and dropped her head to his shoulder. She felt him turn to look at her.

"For what?"

"I didn't think about you and your dad. I shoul-"

"Kate, it's fine, really. I'm just saying I can sort of relate. But hey, we have each other don't we? You've made my Christmas."

"How so?"

"By being here, with me. I didn't want to be alone on Christmas."

"You weren't alone though."

"I would be right now."

"True." She said and smiled. "We should probably get some sleep."

"Agreed, I'll stay and talk until you're about to fall asleep and then head to bed." He said and she yawned, his shoulder surprisingly comfortable.

"Fine, but no funny business." She said and he laughed.

"I promise, I'll be good. Don't want to get caught by Santa."

"You'll... You'll get coal in your... your stocking." She could feel herself drifting. It seemed that talking had finally cleared her mind long enough to allow sleep to come. Or maybe Rick being there was enough, acting like a pillow and friend. Either way she drifted to sleep only to be awoken by the sound of Christmas music coming from some were off in the distance.

She groaned and tried to roll over only to jerk awake by the sudden feeling of falling. She realized that she wasn't in her bed and slowly the events of the night before all came back. She was on Rick's couch. It was Christmas. She opened her eyes to look around to make sure she was right and found herself in a surprising place.

She was laying on top of Rick for the most part, her arm across his chest and she could feel one of his at her lower back. He was snoring gently next to her and she almost didn't want to wake him up no matter how bad this looked. They hadn't done anything, just fallen asleep. In each other's arms.

She shifted slightly and tried to see if there was a way that she could get free without waking him. She needed to get to work if her guess on the time was even close. She moved an inch or more to her right and was just about to pull herself free when she felt him stir. He looked over to her with hooded eyes, a questioning look playing behind them.

"Merry Christmas, Beckett."

She smiled at him. "Merry Christmas. Sorry, was trying not to wake you."

"Slinking away in the early dawn? Never thought you the type."

"I have to go to the station today and I wanted to get changed."

"Do you have to?" He asked and she had a feeling he knew something she didn't.

"What did you do?"

"Me? Why do you think I did something?"

"Because it's you, Castle," she said, narrowing her eyes at him which made him look away.

"I didn't do anything, I swear. Montgomery called this morning and said to let you know that you'd be called if you were needed."

"What do you mean he called, how did he know I was here?"

"I dunno, Lanie maybe? I didn't say anything." It couldn't have been Lanie, Kate hadn't called her. It had to have been Rick.

"Sure, look I gotta go anyway. Thanks for everything." She pulled away from him and picked up her coat, the present he had given her and stopped at the door. "Can you tell Alexis and Martha I said Merry Christmas?"

"Uh sure... yeah." He said and his voice sounded sad. She couldn't help feeling bad as well, but she had already spent too much time here. She had slept in his arms and as she stood there she had to resist the urge to drop everything and go back to them. She nodded, swallowed hard and left through the door.

Outside it still snowed heavily, in fact Kate was pretty sure it was heavier than the day before. The roads were covered and the drifts against the door of the building went up to just below her knees. She stood there for a moment looking up and down the street but no cars were moving. Crap.

Maybe that was why the Captain had told her to stay. There was no way she was getting to work in this. She sighed and wrapped her arms around herself, watching the snow fall and lay across the cityscape. She was going to have to go back upstairs.

"Kate!" She flinched at the voice and felt Rick's hand on her shoulder. She turned to see him wearing nothing but his sweat pants and sweat shirt, his cheeks turned a deep shade of red as did his nose. "You forgot this." He said holding up the stocking from the mantle, it was filled with candy of all types and tiny wrapped gifts.

His teeth chattered and he was visibly shaking.

"Rick..." she said taking the stocking from him and shaking her head. "You're crazy."

"About you, I am." He said and then looked away as if he hadn't meant to say it. It took her a moment to come to realize exactly why.

"Rick, I'm... what do you mean by that."

"I care about you Kate. That was why you were my wish this year. That's why I invited you. You made this one of the best Christmas's that I've ever had, just by being here. Do you understand that?"

"I... I don't know. I was sorta thinking along the same lines."

"Then why are you running away?"

"I'm not running away." She huffed.

"Kate..."

"I'm just... I'm afraid of where this is going. I love having you in my life. I really do, but I don't know if we would work. I don't want to get together and then it just all falls apart and we don't see each other anymore."

"I'm not asking for anything right now, other than you stay for the day, or until the Captain calls. That's it."

"Well, I don't have much choice it seems."

"I guess not..."

"Okay," she said and smirked at him. "Besides I want to see what Alexis thinks of the present I got her."

"I'm sure she'll love it," Rick said and they both headed back to the door. Rick reached over and opened it for her and followed her inside.

She turned around and gasped slightly at the sight of Rick wearing only socks.

"You get sick I'm not nursing you."

"You have to, it'd be your fault."

"How?"

"You forgot the stocking." He said smiling. They stopped at the elevator and stood at the door waiting for it to open. It wouldn't be so bad to spend the day with the Castle family. She loved each of them as much as her own family.

She paused, tracing what she had just thought and couldn't find a way to argue with it. She did love them she realized, and Rick.

"Huh." Rick said and she looked over. He had his head tilted up to the molding around the elevator and she followed his gaze. There, tacked into the wood, was a small green plant.

"You've got to be kidding." She said and glared at him.

"I didn't do anything! Jeeze, why are you so quick to blame me?"

"So, what now?"

"Well... the rule is that you have to kiss who ever is under the mistletoe. But we-"

It was the perfect excuse she thought as she leaned in and caught his lips. He didn't move against her for a long moment and she tried not to laugh because even with her eyes closed she could imagine the shocked look on his face. She pulled him closer and it seemed that movement reassured him that he wouldn't get killed for kissing back.

They parted when the elevator's bell dinged and stood looking at each other. Kate's heart was slamming in her chest like a wrecking ball swinging into a building every half second. She had just kissed Richard Castle. It felt... odd and yet she didn't regret it in the slightest.

"Wow." Rick said and she nodded in agreement while she stepped into the elevator.

"You coming?"

"I dunno, I think I'm going to see if I can get this mistletoe framed or something."

"Shut up and let's go." She said, laughing.

"Fine, fine." He held his hands up in defense and looked up at the mistletoe as he passed under it again. "I love you, you little green plant."

"Hm, maybe if you're good for the rest of the day you won't need the plant to get a kiss."

"Oh, another one with you?"

"I didn't say anything about me." She said slyly and the elevator doors began to close. "But who knows?"

A/N: And that's it for this Christmas story. If everything works out like I think it will, I'll have a new Christmas story for this year up on the 14th. I hope you all enjoyed it and have a wonderful month filled with fun and laughter.