Craving Wishes
Raven inhaled for air that her lungs so desperately craved. Instead chlorinated pool water rushed in with a salty taste and filled her lungs. Her eyes opened underneath the water as they began to ascend to the surface. A wild look shone in her crystalline eyes before she began coughing up water. Beast boy had tried to release her but her thin arms remained locked around his shoulder in an iron grip. He would've laughed at her expression if the fear in her eyes wasn't present. The other four titans had stopped their game to observe the commotion that had happened just seconds prior.
"Is Raven the okay?" Starfire moved the loose strands of her long hair that clung to her face.
Robin stared at the couple a distance away. "I don't think so, Star. If anything, she'll kill him for that."
"Long lived Beast boy." Cyborg agreed.
Robin then shared a knowing look with Cyborg. The three of them made no move to intervene but watched from a safe distance. They couldn't even hear the words being exchanged between the two friends. The two boys had warned Beast boy earlier but he was out of earshot then. Beast boy did his best to swim to the shallow end while Raven still had him in a death grip. It wasn't an easy feat to keep from drowning both of them but it wasn't impossible.
"Uh…Raven you can just stand up now." A light blush tainted his cheeks at the awkwardness.
She observed her surroundings and came to the conclusion that they were in three feet of water. She quickly released her grip on him. Raven stumbled backwards away from him and nearly fell into the water. Beast boy's green arms flashed out and held onto her arms to help steady her.
Raven avoided his gaze, "Right." She turned her back on him and hurriedly waded through the pool. Her eyes were locked onto the steps that lead out of the pool.
"Raven, are you alright?" Starfire asked, floating on her back and moving into Raven's path. "Have you changed your mind and decided to join us?"
She shook her head; the water droplets came loose. "No."
"But th-
"Sorry but no Star."
The five titans watched the retreating Raven as she left the pool. She rung out her long and dripping purple hair and sat in a plastic blue chair. Her lungs burned with the chemically treated water and her eyes weren't any better. A sharp pain stabbed her every time she took a breath which forced her to breath shallowly. Her face burned red with embarrassment. People had seen, not all of them but a good amount. She had almost drowned. Raven's heart still pounded in her chest from the adrenaline rush that surged throughout her veins. She could even hear her heartbeat thudding in her ears. She settled for drying off and watching her friends, her arms crossed and a small pout settled on her lips. It wasn't until Beast boy's absence from the pool that she began to wonder of his whereabouts.
"Before you scream at me and throw me overboard," He appeared from behind her and took a seat in the plastic chair next to her. "I'm really, really sorry for doing that to you…I wasn't thinking. Sure I knew you'd kill me but…" He trailed off.
Raven raised an eyebrow at him, "But what?"
She saw him shrug, "I didn't expect you to have a panic attack." He finished.
She glared at him then, "I wasn't panicking." It was her sad attempt at a lie and to cover up her embarrassment. She knew she shouldn't have even tried to argue.
Beast boy rolled his green eyes at her, "You can't deny that. What, you can't swim or something?"
Raven averted her gaze and didn't intend to reply to him. She was awful at lying and this time she saved herself the trouble of trying. She seemed all too interested with the loose strand on her drenched T-shirt. Beast boy waited several moments to give her the chance to admit it to him first. He could easily read the tell-tale signs of her previous actions that swimming was the problem.
"You really can't swim, is that why you went to the library instead?" He prodder her with another question and could only hope that he wasn't prying.
Raven seemed to shrink away from him but quietly nodded her head. She half expected to hear his deep laughter for not knowing how to do something so simple. She prepared to feel the stabbing pain that would reach her heart, the one that she would fight so desperately against. Only two people could make her feel that way who went by the names of Malchior and Terra. If she was here, we wouldn't be having this conversation…I would still be in the library. Raven's head swarmed with those thoughts and possible different outcomes that could have been but didn't matter at the moment.
"Rae, did you hear me?" Beast boy's eyebrows knitted together in concern.
She shook her head and the water droplets flew. "Sorry."
This was weird to Beast boy; her behavior was so unlike Raven. Raven wouldn't have apologized to him so easily. By now, Cyborg would've tossed him a life saver. He had even seen her blush a select few times with the absence of her indigo cloak back at home. So quick he wasn't even sure; he saw her true emotions flit across her face before she composed herself.
"I said that you don't need to know how to swim to still have fun with us." He scrutinized her reaction.
Raven seemed to fidget under his gaze, but again she had no intention to say anything. She bit her bottom lip but when she found him still looking, she struggled to put on a straight face.
"C'mon it'll be fun." Beast boy told her as he stood up.
Raven shook her head and made no move to follow him. "But th-
"…but what?" Beast boy coaxed, she had stopped herself short of whatever she was going to tell him. "We can stay in the shallow end."
She closed her eyes, "Please don't make me do this." She wasn't only frightened of drowning, she feared water itself. A phobia.
"I won't stop you from sitting out." Beast boy quickly amended. "Are you going to be alright?"
Raven nodded her head and looked up into his concerned eyes. "I'd rather sit here."
"And no worries, I won't tell them that you can't swim." Beast boy assured her. Raven nodded at him; a sign that she had heard him.
Beast boy nodded at her answer. He hesitated before he walked back towards the pool and gave her a backwards glance. But Raven was occupied with towel drying her hair off. The four titans had resumed their game but it was obvious that they were distracted. Robin had managed to tag Bumblebee as she was now it. But upon Beast boy's return she opened her eyes.
"You're an idiot, you know that?" Cyborg scolded his friend's actions.
Robin's lips were pressed in a hard line, "That was dangerous Beast boy, she could've been injured." He gave Beast boy a disapproving look beneath his mask. "Just because we're on vacation, it doesn't mean the rules don't apply to us."
Beast boy nodded. "I know." He automatically felt younger, it felt similar to Mento scolding him when he was a child. "I didn't really think about it an-
"Don't let it happen again." Robin interrupted.
"Is she alright?" Bumblebee nodded her head to the empath lying on a chair. The sun had set nearly twenty minutes prior.
Beast boy stared at each of his teammates and guiltily shrugged his shoulders. "She says she is but Raven doesn't look like it."
Starfire glanced in the direction of their friend. "Perhaps I may talk to her?"
"Uh, she might want to be left alone for a bit." Cyborg added, he leaned over to Robin and spoke in a hushed tone. "This is a new record: she lets Beast boy get away with that and he wasn't maimed."
Robin nodded in agreement but didn't analyze it any further. "Maybe she's finally coming around to him."
"In a little while then." Starfire turned back on the chairs. "Shall we continue or game in the meantime? Bumblebee is the Polo."
Beast boy shook his head, "That got old. Let's play shark and minnows." Upon seeing Robin's glare, he added: "I promise not to turn into a shark this time."
"It's the same concept." Bumblebee had both hands on her hips.
Raven stared at the dark sky, it was much easier to see the stars as the skies had cleared. Living in Jump City made it difficult to star gaze with the city lights. Even if she did live in the tower that sat in the ocean. She shivered from still wearing her damp clothes and cooled air from the absence of the sun's warmth. She had already found four different constellations. Out of the corner of her eye Starfire sat beside her on a different chair.
And as expected Starfire was the one to break the silence. "Do you wish to talk about it?" She could very well sense that the empath was a little off.
"No thanks." Raven shifted so the white towel she was given, rested on her shoulders. "Why aren't you with them?" A flash of hurt crossed Starfire's features. "I mean not that I don't appreciate your presence."
Starfire's eyes traveled to her friends that we're trying to hold a relay race in the crowded pool. "I have accidently ingested too much of the nasty pool water." She shivered at the thought of it. "And my arms are sore."
"Ah." Raven mumbled and glanced at the red haired woman before returning her eyes to the sky.
"Am I being of the nuisance to you?" Starfire prodded, "If you wish I could leave. I merely suspected that you are not feeling well."
Raven was quiet as she processed Starfire's anxious words. "No, I'd like it if you'd stayed."
"I would be glad to." Starfire relaxed in the chair with her hands clasped in her lap.
She craved Starfire's cheery presence. Her happiness blocked out Raven's fear of drowning. The fact that she almost had drowned had truly shaken her up. But now she was far from the water's edge despite the fact they were still in the middle of the ocean. As long as she immersed herself in the cruise activities it wouldn't be as bad.
Raven hesitated before she initiated the conversation, "Would you…like to stargaze with me?"
It wasn't unusual for the pair to participate in activities with one another. On the occasion Starfire would meditate with her, even Bumblebee had given it a try a couple of times. They had sleep overs with the other titans and had participated in boy talk. Although, Raven would never give an indication that she had a crush on someone.
"I'd love to."
Raven outstretched her gray arm, "If you look there, you'll find Orion." She explained it further until Starfire could see the same image as her. "
"Oh, I see it!" Starfire exclaimed. "And what of the little and big dipper Robin has told me about?"
It was the very first time that Starfire could actually stargaze. Cyborg had planned a camping trip for them during the summer that had been repeatedly pushed back. And before the titans knew it, summer had faded into autumn and the snow began to fall. Dealing with unpredictable villains that caused trouble and charity events held by the mayor. The two of them continued to watch the sky and Starfire had even pointed out a few she recognized from pictures.
"A shooting star," Starfire exclaimed and made sure Raven saw it. "You are to make the wish." Sure enough a thin white streak traveled amongst the stars before disappearing.
Raven turned her head to look at the amused woman. "You believe in that?"
"It does not hurt to pretend."
That was something Starfire would say. Raven couldn't thing of a simple thing to wish for. Thoughts of all sorts raced through her mind but she could pick one out in particular. By the time she had weeded it out she deemed it too late to make a wish. Not that Raven would even tell Starfire that she in fact did have a wish in mind. It was ridiculous, those types of things were for small children and apparently people who liked to pretend.
The one thing Raven ever wanted was to have complete control over her powers and emotions. The one thing Azar herself couldn't grant the cursed empath. It wasn't as if she didn't want to feel, she simply wasn't allowed to. And she disliked it. Showing no emotions limited her in ways she didn't even know possible.
"Hey," Cyborg called to the two women.
Raven was knocked out of her reverie as four tall titans approached. "Is something wrong?" Starfire questioned.
Bumblebee shook her head. "We're getting' soft serve ice cream. Did y'all wanna come?"
"Certainly." Starfire stood up but slipped on a puddle of water from when she had gotten out the pool. Her knees hit the deck first and both hands slapped against the ground; sure to give her a stinging sensation.
Beast boy standing the closest helped Starfire to her feet. "You good, Star?"
"That was quite a fall." Robin agreed and examined his girlfriend for any injuries.
Starfire brushed both of them off. "I have faced much worse in battle."
It was a true statement. A little slip hadn't phased the tamaranian one bit. Compared to all the times she had been struck down by a villain or crashed through cement, it was hardly worth fussing about.
Raven pulled off the white towel. "Sounds…good."
"Alright then." Cyborg said he led the way off the sky deck and trusted that his friends would follow.
It took about seven minutes of walking on the eleventh deck. Cyborg held open the glass door of Candy Cove. Raven could smell the sweet aroma a foot away from the door. A lot of people roamed around the large store. Candy of all types that ranged from hard, to fudge, to soft, to sour sat on different shelves. Near the back of the store sweet pastries sat behind a little glass with even more candy resting on top. Off to the side was a set of self-serve ice cream machines with the options of a bowl or different types of cones.
"You can't eat ice cream with a bowl." Beast boy eyed Raven's hands which indeed held a red and white bowl.
Raven stared at him. "And how else do you suggest I eat it?"
"With a chocolate covered waffle cone." Beast boy said it as if it was the first time Raven had even heard of such a thing.
"Of course you would say that." But she replaced the bowl on the stack she had took it from. And she reached for a cone as Beast boy suggested.
Bumblebee stepped out of the way after she had made her ice cream, "It's getting pretty cold." With her free hand she rubbed her opposite arm in order to create friction.
Raven nodded in agreement, "A hot shower would feel nice."
"How could you have gotten vanilla?" Cyborg said, he obviously disapproved her choice of flavor.
Raven hesitantly licked the cold treat which didn't help her current body temperature. "Easy. I picked up a cone and pulled the lever." Her voice was full of sarcasm.
"You know what I mean." Cyborg muttered and took a chunk out of his strawberry ice cream. "You are such a plain Jane."
"Whatever, I tend to like it." Raven replied, but vanilla had been her favorite choice of ice cream for some time now. In a way Cyborg was right, she wouldn't even bother to try out a new flavor.
The group of six headed out of the shop after they all had the flavor they wanted. Robin had spotted an empty table and they all made their way over. As they talked, Raven found herself lost in her own thoughts once more. The cold treat didn't fail to raise chill bumps up and down her exposed arms. She was the last to finish eating her waffle cone and was quite full afterwards.
"…showing fireworks tonight." Robin said.
Bumblebee used a napkin to wipe her mouth, "Actually I think I'm going to head to my cabin. "I'm exhausted."
Beast boy agreed with her. "We still have tons of stuff to do tomorrow. I'm going to bed early." That was news if he claimed to sleep early. He always stayed up late until the early hours whether it be playing video games, a movie marathon, rarely talking to Raven or lost in his own thoughts.
"Maybe we'll watch it tomorrow night." Robin said as his friends had different intentions.
Bumblebee stood up from the table as did the rest of titans. Napkins were disposed of before they walked further down the deck to find the crowded elevator. Raven wrinkled her nose at having to stand uncomfortably close to strangers. Soon enough they entered a narrow hallway full of cabins on either side. Raven stared at the light blue carpet that had green lily pads and pink flowers. Finally, they had reached doors 505, 506, and 507 and turned to bid their goodnights. Hugs and kisses between couples were shared but Raven denied any form of contact. The boys were further down the hallway and turned to leave.
"Have the sweet dreams." Starfire waved after them and pulled out room key.
"How about coming to my cabin after our showers?" Bumblebee asked. She then inserted her room key in the slot of door 506.
Starfire nodded, "I shall be quick."
Raven nodded her head, "Alright." She stepped into the cabin she had completely to herself.
Raven shut and locked the door behind her after she turned on the light. She moved to her lavender suitcase that sat in front of a white chair. She frowned at the thought of seeing what Bumblebee and Starfire really packed for her. She searched until she retrieved what looked to be pajamas. Raven was relieved to find a black top with a skull outlined in white wearing a bow. She found the plaid black and white shorts that went with the top and sat it on the edge of the bed.
Raven collected her toiletries and headed towards the small bathroom for her shower. It took nearly four minutes to find out how to work the chrome knobs and then some for warm water. The chrome shower head hung over her and sprouted out warm water that cascaded down her gray skin. Perspiration trickled down the cream colored walls and the scent of cherry blossoms filled the small space. Raven made sure to wash the chlorine out of her hair and basked in the warmth.
Soon she sat on the Bumblebee's bed with Starfire in between them. "I am missing my little Silkie."
"He's being well cared for." Raven curled her knees up to her chest.
Bumblebee was in the middle of channel surfing, "Yeah you shouldn't worry." She sat the black remote on the bed and reached for her gray flip phone on the nearby table. "In fact, Aqualad sent this."
Buttons beeped as she searched for the gallery in her phone. Once there, Bumblebee held up her phone for both women to see. Sure enough the teenaged twins were looking out for Silkie. Menos held out a purple gum drop to feed the worm while Mas was rebuilding a collapsed gingerbread house. Speedy sat on the U-shaped couch, his back turned to face the boys, his face set in a scowl. More likely reprimanding them from letting the worm sit on the kitchen table.
Starfire nodded, "You both are correct. Perhaps my worrying is the unnecessary."
Raven let go of her legs and rested her head on the soft pillow behind her. "It is."
Bumblebee closed the flip phone and replaced it on the table. "Any plans for tomorrow? We'll be on Moala Island."
"Perhaps I will do the hiking." Starfire said, "Or maybe canoe to the deserted islands."
"With Robin no doubt." Bumblebee muttered under her breath. "What about you, Raven?"
She shrugged her shoulders, "I'm not sure. Maybe visit a museum."
The rest of the night passed away with the three girls talking to one another and watching TV. Starfire had been the first to nod off and held one of the pillows to her chest. Raven and Bumblebee had continued to talk until her head became clouded and her eyes unfocused. But with the long pauses Raven had succumbed to sleep.