Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
Bella's P.O.V.
"Relax, Bells." Alice said soothingly. We were sitting in a hospital room, waiting for Dr. Henderson to bring in the results.
"How can I relax?" I snapped.
"Just because you took home pregnancy tests doesn't mean that you're pregnant. Those things are usually totally useless most of the time." She placed a tiny arm around my shoulders and nestled herself closer to me.
"Alice... what happens if I am pregnant? There's no way I can stay here." I whimpered.
"Of course you can stay here! Even though my idiotic brother might not be here for you, I will, and so will Jasper." She whispered furiously. At the mention of Edward's name, my head ached even more than before.
"I love you and all, Alice... But there's no way that I can stay in town, carry his child with him off being with Tanya."
"That's only if you're pregnant. You know what they say... Wishful thinking and what not."
"Wishful thinking isn't going to help this hellish situation."
"Miss Swan, the results are in." Dr. Henderson said as she reappeared in the doorway to the room. My heart dropped to my stomach as a cold sweat broke out all over my overheated body.
"And?" I urged impatiently. Alice placed a comforting hand on my knee. It was also a warning to remain calm.
"Congratulations are in order, I suppose. The results are positive; you're pregnant." Dr. Henderson was oblivious to the terrible web of lies and deception my life had become as she smiled cheerily. Blame it on the hormones, but I felt the urge to slap that smile off her face. She glided back out of the room in an instant after writing up a script for prenatal vitamins and leaving us with some more information.
"No, no, no." I whispered, tears forming in my eyes.
"Bells, you'll get through this. I'll help you; I don't want to see this destroy you." Alice managed to squeak out.
There was no way that I could stay here. What would happen to me in this small town? So many vicious rumors would be spread about me, probably calling me a whore to have gotten pregnant without a husband to show. It made me want to laugh at how old-fashioned Forks is. If only they knew the truth behind this so-called 'miracle of life'.
I knew I had to leave. I couldn't face Edward and his happiness with Tanya as I sat there growing larger and larger with his child growing inside of me. There couldn't be a more masochistic way to live my life than that.
...
That appointment was almost three weeks ago and I still hadn't changed my decision. I was leaving. My stomach was already starting to grow, though you couldn't exactly notice it unless I wore my more form-fitting clothes, which I didn't.
Calls from Edward were becoming less frequent than before. Only about once or twice a week at most did either of my phones ring because of him. Alice, on the other hand, was another story entirely. She called at least ten times a day, trying to convince me to stay. Her attempts were purely in vain. My bags were packed, I had confirmation that I could move to my company's office in New York, my house was sold, and I already had an apartment for me there.
And I was leaving.
Well, not so much leaving, more like running away. I was coward, not willing to face the mess I had created, with Edward's help. It really was better this way, for everyone involved in the situation. I would leave and hopefully move on with my life, taking my little piece of Edward with me, and Edward could live his life with no more interference from me.
After putting the last of my carry-on bags in my car, I went back inside to make sure I hadn't left anything. All of the rooms in my home held memories of the times Edward and I had shared. Thinking back, the love I held for him seemed to always be one-sided.
Were all of those whispered words of affection and gentle caresses just ploys to get into my pants? Probably. My house was completely empty, meaning that it was time to leave the town that I had called my home for years. I had already said my farewells to all of my family and friends except Edward. It would be easier for me if I didn't see him one last time. I knew that if I gazed into those beautiful eyes, all plans of leaving would fly out the window.
Sighing, I locked the front door to my house and made my way over to my beat-up old truck. I smiled to myself, remembering how everyone loved to make fun of the old thing, claiming it was going to just up and die someday soon. I loved it just the same.
"Crap." I muttered when I dropped my car keys. As I bent down to retrieve them, a pale hand shot out incredibly fast in front of my eyes to grab my keys. My blood ran cold; I knew that hand all too well.
Shitshitshit. I drew myself up to my full height, but didn't dare look him in the face.
"So, when were you going to plan on telling me about all of this?" Edward asked icily, waving his hands from me to the truck and finally, my empty home.
"It doesn't matter." I said quietly, still looking down at my hands. How had I not seen him before? Am I really that oblivious? How had he found out...who told him?
"Doesn't matter?" He muttered angrily. He seized my face, forcing me to look into his enraged eyes.
"This is all for the best, Edward." I whispered.
"How?" I was shocked to see pain flash in his eyes.
"It... It just is, okay?" I groaned.
"Cut the crap already, Bella." He seethed. "Did you see a doctor yet?" His growing anger was really starting to frighten me. Not that Edward would ever hurt me or anything, but still, he had never been this menacing before.
"Yes." I said.
"And? Is this pregnancy for real?" He questioned. I contemplated whether or not I should tell him. Maybe it would be better if I didn't. To me, I didn't think he deserved to have a say anymore after that stunt he pulled; kicking me out right after sex. Right after I told him.
"No." I lied. His shoulders sagged and he pulled me to his chest, an embrace almost too inviting to decline. But I had to. I struggled against his grasp, but he only held me tighter. Even though I knew this baby would be a heavy burden, it still hurt that he was happy about me not being pregnant.
"Please. Bella, please don't leave. I need you in my life. I promise everything is going to work out, just give it time." He whispered into my ear. His hold on me loosened and I used that to my advantage, pushing him away from me angrily and taking two giant steps back.
"That's what you've been saying for years! But you just can't seem to have the desire to leave the woman you've claimed you didn't love at all. We both know that you don't love me. And we certainly both know that you were never going to leave Tanya for me. No matter how many times you told me you would." I yelled angrily to his shocked face.
"Bella, I do love you. Isn't that enough?"
"It might be...if you actually meant it." I laughed bitterly.
"Please, don't go! Bella, I love you more than anything...more than anyone." He corrected himself. Looking at him and seeing him look so hurt and pained made my resolve waver. Only for a second.
"I have to." I made a move to get into my car but he blocked my path.
"Where does this leave us, Bella?" He whispered. I reached out to touch his cheek softly. His eyes closed as he leaned into my hand. It broke my heart to leave, but I couldn't bear to be here anymore.
"You'll always be a great memory." I murmured, hastily climbing into my truck before he could react.
As I backed out of my driveway, I saw him turn to me once more and shake his head slowly, begging me one last time not to leave. I drove away without a second glance at him as I let the tears I had been holding in for days fall gently down my face.
He would always be more than a great memory. Edward would forever be etched in my heart and mind.
I had been right to not want to see him a last time before leaving. Seeing him so torn up made me want to comfort him, tell him that I loved him and would stay for him.
I couldn't.
Sure, my friends would miss me, but they had their own lives to live and I had mine. I most definitely wasn't going to live mine pining for a man that I could never have.
Especially not with his child that I would have to raise alone. At least in New York I could have the hope that I would be able to move on and find someone who would return the love I gave. Not having to hide and avoid the object of my affections on a daily basis.
My ringing phone brought me out of my thoughts. I looked down at the caller I.D. Alice.
"Hello?" I answered glumly.
"I am so sorry, Bella. I shouldn't have told him! I just thought that you had left already! I didn't know that he would track you down. I'm sorry." Alice blubbered.
Alice told Edward about me leaving!
"What? How could you tell him, Alice! I told you that I didn't want him to know at all!" I screeched.
"I know you did. It just kind of slipped out yesterday. Please, please, please don't be mad at me." She begged.
"Calm down, pixie girl. I'm not mad at you. A little annoyed, yes, but not mad. At least now we both have closure." I sighed. I heard Alice let out a sigh of relief.
"Phew. But I really am sorry; I didn't mean to tell him until after you left." I turned into the driveway at my father's house. I had to leave my truck with him; it was of no use to me in New York.
"Okay Alice, I'm at Charlie's, so I'm going to have to call you back later. Love you."
"Love you too, Bella. Call me as soon as your flight lands!" She sang. I threw my phone back into my purse and grabbed my bags, heading for Charlie's front door.
"Well, time to leave already, huh?" Charlie said gruffly after opening the door.
"Ahh dad, don't be like that. I was bound to leave sometime." I soothed.
"Preferably after you were forty." He muttered. Laughing, I handed him the keys to my truck.
"Take care of the senior citizen, Dad." I said as we climbed into his cruiser.
"Yeah, yeah."
...
"Flight 673 to New York is now boarding." The intercom crackled above our heads.
"I guess this is it, huh Bells?" My dad asked quietly. He pulled me in for one last hug, and I planted a small kiss on the top of his head.
"I promise to call often, and expect me over for all the major holidays." I whispered, pulling away from him.
I gathered up my bags and with one last wave to Charlie, made my way over to the gate.
Walking over the threshold, I felt an odd sense of relief to be leaving Forks. Everything seemed sharper with a new clarity that I hadn't been used to.
I felt free.
To live and not to breathe
Is to die in tragedy
To run, to run away
To find what you believe
And I leave behind
This hurricane of fucking lies
I lost my faith to this
This town that don't exist
So I run
I run away
To the light of masochist
And I leave behind
This hurricane of fucking lies
And I walked this line
A million and one fucking times
But not this time
I don't feel any shame
I won't apologize
When there ain't nowhere you can go
Running away from pain
When you've been victimized
Tales from another broken home
You're leaving...
You're leaving...
You're leaving...
Ah you're leaving home..