BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!

BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

These were the sounds of the weapons being fired by one Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Namikaze, and Hinata Hyuga. They were all shooting at their target who went by the name of Kakashi Hatake, who was literally running as if his life was depending on it, which was actually true. You may be wandering how this came to be...

(Flashback)

The next day came and the entire Team 7 was at their designated training grounds, you know, the one near the memorial stone. Yeah, that one. "Alright everyone, time to start your test," instructed the one eye jonin, who was on time for once. The reason for this was because Kushina and Mikoto had a little 'talk' with him. I won't go into details, but it involves him and yaoi.

"And what is the test?" asked Hinata. Kakashi gave one of his eye smiles and pull out two bells, which he proceeded to place over his waist.

"The test is to grab the bells. As you notice, there are only two of them. That means that one of you will be sent back to the academy."

"Like hell I'm grabbing the bells! You placed them over your junk!" yelled Naruto. Kakashi sported a tick mark at the insult, but managed to keep his cool.

"Okay then. You must come at me with the intent to kill. Don't go easy, go all out. And go!" stated Kakashi, closing his eyes. He sense that the three are still in front of him, so he guess two things. 'Okay, either they are planning to attack me head on as a team, or they are planning to attack me on their own. Either way, piece of cake.'

Click!

Click!

Click!

The distinctive sound of clicks caused Kakashi to open his eyes, which he then started to regret. In front of him were all his students pointing their respective weapons at him. Sasuke with his 12.7mm rifle, Naruto with his Casull and Jackal copies of his grandpa's pistols, and Hinata with the Harkonnen, all of them pointing at Kakashi. It was then that Kakashi realized that he is, as most people would say, fucked.

"Aw, crapbaskets."

(Flashback end)

And that is how the team got into this current situation. Amazingly, Kakashi manage to dodge every single bullet that was whizzing by him. Whenever by his skills of a jonin or by pure luck, it didn't matter. The important thing is that they are all working together as a team, even though they are nearly succeeding in killing him. Though the thing that irked him him is that they aren't using jutsus. Team 7 needs to use jutsus in order to pass.

"Hold on a minute!" shouted Kakashi, dodging a 12.7mm round shot by Sasuke. "You already got the teamwork, but I can't pass you unless you use jutsus!"

"Way ahead of you!" shouted Sasuke as he holstered his rifle, made some hand signs, shunshin behind Kakashi, and yelled, "Konoha's Secret Technique: 1000 Flaming Years of Death!" Fire enveloped the Uchiha's hands, who then proceed to poke the jonin's ass. The result was both instantaneously and hilarious. Kakashi was sent flying over the field, holding his now smoking ass. He noticed that Hinata now appeared in front of him and got into the Jyuken stance, Byakugan actived.

"My turn! Eight Trigrams: Sixty-Four Bitch-Slapping Palms!" Hinata then attacked ferociously, slapping Kakashi on the face without mercy. In the process, she mange to destroy his mask, exposing the man's handsomely hidden face. How Kakashi's face didn't get bruised during the attack is beyond anyone's comprehension. Not like it matters since it was funny when a grown 27 year old man is getting his ass handed to him by an 12 year old girl.

"Two! Four! Eight! Sixteen! Thirty-two! Sixty-Four Bitch-Slaps!" yelled out Hinata as she delivered the final blow, sending Kakashi over the field once more. This time, he landed on the ground.

"Is it over?" meekly asked Kakashi, slowly getting up. He noticed a shadow looming over him. The man looked up, and paled when he saw Naruto flying straight toward him with a giant ass Rasengan, dangerously swirling within the hands of his sensei's son.

"Check out my dad's signature technique, only better! Odama Rasengan!" shouted Naruto as he was ascending towards his sensei. Kakashi looked at Naruto with both pride and fear. Pride for the boy's power, and fear that he was at the receiving end.

'If there is anything in the world I regret,' thought Kakashi, just as the spiraling ball of pure chakra was about to destroy him. 'It is getting myself as Gai's eternal rival.'

(An hour later)

Team 7 couldn't help but stare at Kakashi being on life support after the insane power attack they inflicted on him. They saw how the jonin is being taken care by the doctors and nurses, mostly nurses now that his face is exposed. They sweatdopped how despite the fact he is very injured, Kakashi is still able to giggle at each nurse who gave him some 'treatment'.

"So," said Sasuke, "Do we pass? We worked as a team."

"Yeah, yeah, you all pass," waved off Kakashi, receiving a 'medical massage' by a nurse. "We'll start tomorrow and begin D-ranks." Naruto, Hinata, and Sasuke looked at each other, shrugged, and left the hospital, leaving behind their sensei and his nurses.

(At the Namikaze estates)

Minato was enjoying one of his long breaks after finishing paperwork. How he did you ask? Two words. Kage Bushins. Anyways, he was sitting on a couch along with Kushina and Mikoto. He sat at the left, Kushina on the middle, and Mikoto on the right. They were watching a movie on their T.V, when suddenly Kyushana and Alucard phased through the wall, as always.

"Hello Kushina, anything happened today?" asked Kyushana.

"Not to my knowledge," answered Kushina.

"Really?" spoke Alucard. "Because word on the street is that Kakashi had his ass handed over to him by a bunch of kids." The rest of the grown-ups rose their eyebrows at this.

"And who are the kids who beat Kakashi?" asked Mikoto.

"Us!" shouted two voices. Everyone turned to the front door and saw Naruto and Sasuke, both having shit eating grins. "We beat him harder than Justin Beiber takes it to the face!" said Naruto.

"That's my sochis" cheered Kushina as she scooped up the two and gave them an really strong hug.

"Can't...Breathe" said Sasuke, gasping between air.

"Sasuke, lighten up. You passed the gennin exams. You should be proud." said Kyushana.

"I know, but I want to surpass Itachi."

"Oh don't worry, you'll get there." assured Mikoto. "It's not like Itachi beats you in everything." Suddenly, noises can be heard in one of the bedrooms, catching everyone's attention. Everyone stood up and walked over to the source, where it turns out to be Itachi's room. When they opened the door, they were greeted to the sight of a naked Itachi getting it on with a naked Ayame on his bed. The two froze upon seeing every occupant of the estate staring right at them, more importantly, at him.

"It is exactly how it looks like," Itachi stated, causing the everyone minus Alucard, Naruto, and Sasuke to facefault.

Alucard, meanwhile, gave his half-grandson a shit eating grin with a Jiraiya approved thumbs up. "That's my boy!" he stated before grabbing an unconscious Kyushana and phased to his bedroom, preparing to give the sexy times while his wife is passed out. Sasuke and Naruto, on the other hand, peeked into their pants, then to Itachi, then to pants, then Itachi, and finally pants before crouching and drew on the ground with a dark cloud over their heads.

"He beat us," they muttered.

(Hokage tower- the next day)

Minato sat at his desk, with various jonins in the room. It was time to give the results of the real genin exams. Team cannon fodder 1-6 has failed already, so let's skip to 7.

"Team 7, report," said Minato. Not receiving a response, he saw that his former student has yet to arrived. "Okay, team 8, report."

As Kurenai stepped forward, everyone noticed how she is blushing, but didn't questioned about it. "Barely passed."

"Let me guess, Sakura?" asked Minato.

"You have no idea how right you are." replied Kurenai.

"Moving on, team 10, report."

"Passed," answered Asuma, taking a puff of his cigarette.

"Okay, where is Kakashi? Even he knows not to be late in this kinds of meeting." asked Minato.

"He ain't coming," said Jiraiya, entering through the window. "He's severely injured by his genin team after receiving a can of whoop ass." At this point, everyone's eyes were already bugging out. "Also Team 7 passed."

"Why am I not surprise," said Tsunade, entering from the door. 13 years ago, ever since the bizarre event of the Kyubi, aka Kyushana, aka Kushina's mother, Tsunade decided to stay because...

1. She gets the chance to start her medical program thanks to Minato and Kushina.

2. She likes Kushina and Mikoto, treating them as her surrogate daughters.

3. Shizune liked Kakashi (She's secretly a closet pervert).

4. Alucard scared the shit out of her.

and 5. Kyushana once said that her (Tsunade) breasts were small compared to hers (Kyushana), pissing off the slug sannin. Long story.

"No kidding, anyways have you seen Naruto? I'm here to drop off his latest Icha Icha," asked Jiraiya with a perverted grin.

"Every fiber in my being wants me to ripped you apart for corrupting my son, but unfortunately my damn father-in-law thought it would be good." growled Minato.

"And that is way I like that guy," said Jiraiya. Minato simply banged his head on the table.

"Why me?"

(One week later)

"Maelstorm Fucker in position."

"Sexy Lavender in position."

"Mirror Monkey in positon."

"Scarecrow in position. Do you see the the tag?"

"Maelstorm here, target has the tag. Permission to engage?"

"Permission granted. Give them hell."

"For PONY!" shouted Naruto, Hinata, and Sasuke as they unholstered their weapons and started shooting like crazy at their target.

Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!Bang!

Boom!Boom!Boom!BoomBoom!Boom!Boom!Boom!Boom!Boom!!Boom!Boom!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

This kept up for 75 minutes.

(Later)

Everything was calm in the mission room, until a smokin ball of fur flew inside as Gai-like speeds and crashed right onto the fire daiymo's wife. It was revealed to be the notorious demon cat, Tora. Everyone was wondering what the hell happened until Team 7 came in, each genin carrying their weapons while Kakashi was still reading his Icha Icha. The genin had a sinister smile on their faces, scaring everyone else. "Here kitty kitty kitty," mused Naruto, waving his pistols at the cat. Tora screeched in fear and motioned his owner to get the hell out of there. The fire lady must have understood because in no less than a second, they got the hell out of there.

"Damn, it got away," complained Hinata. Everyone, including Iruka, Sarutobi, and Minato, sweatdropped at this. Sarutobi cleared his throat, gaining team 7's attention.

"Okay, team 7. Um, good job retrieving Tora the cat. Now, I have a couple more missions for you four to take, such as cleaning the Inuzuka's kennels, painting some fences, and-"

"Give us a C-rank," said team 7, which later caused Iruka to give a speech about the missions what nots. After giving his speech, he noticed that Naruto, Hinata, and Sasuke were all asleep. Ticked off, the scar-chunnin used his patented Big Head no Jutsu and woke the hell out of them. "Geez, you didn't have to scream." said Sasuke.

"Alright, how about this. I got a low C-rank for you three. The mission is to escort a bridge builder to wave country. How's that for a mission," suggested Minato.

"Deal," said Naruto, grabbing the scroll of said mission. The Yondaime motioned one of his guards to introduced the client. The client turns out to be an old man who reek of booze, but given that both Tsunade and Alucard drink a lot of alcohol, they weren't affected much.

"What's this? I asked for a ninja team, not some brats coming from a cosplaying convention. What's with the blond one? He looks the strangest," said Tazuna, taking a swing of his bottle of sake. A gunshot was heard, and his bottle suddenly shattered into millions of pieces, splashing the liquid all over the floor. Tazuna looked at the source, and was wide eyed when he saw Naruto pointing at him with his pistols.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear you over the sound of me owning your ass. Care to repeat that?" taunted Naruto. Tazuna gulped and nodded no. Naruto smiled as he holstered his weapons. "That's more like it. Alright then, I'll meet you all at the front gates." And with that, Team 7 left, leaving behind Tazuna, Sarutobi, Iruka, and Minato. Minato sighed as he ruffled his hair.

"Why do I have the distinctive feeling that this mission is about to get crazy?"

(Omake-why Kurenai was blushing)

Last time, Mizuki was introduced to his very busty, but loli-sized date, a snow fox by the name Yuki. He was also introduced to Yuki's younger yet taller, scary, and unknown to him, hot brother, Koga. Needless to say, first time meeting was awkward. Never the less, it worked out well, if you ignored the interruptions that came to the date. What was the interruptions, you may ask? Was it hecklers, demon-haters, paparazzi's, Gai and Lee suddenly shouting their flames of youth? Nope, no, no, and maybe. Nope, it was Koga himself. Since he was the third wheel, Yuki suggested for her brother to go out and do something. Koga decided to agree and took a walk around Konaha.

Which is why he finds himself walking toward a random training ground, or to be specific, the one where Kurenai's team is located.

"So bored." he said, walking across the field. He stopped when he noticed 4 chakra signatures nearby. "Hmm, I wonder what's going on." He performed a ice shunshin (Imagine it) and appeared to the source. He saw 5 beings, a boy with a hood, a dog, another boy with sunglasses, a pink hair boy-girl thing, and a lady wearing bandages. He noticed that they were all staring at him. The dog boy was looking at him in awe, the sunglasses one was analyzing him, the pink hair one was sneering at him, and the lady was...blushing?

"WHO ARE YOU?!" screeched Sakura. Koga winced as he rubbed his fox ears, which caused the lady to let out a small squeal, before composing herself.

"Ow, control your banshee," said Koga. Sakura was fuming while Kiba laughed as if it was the funniest joke in the world, Shino looked a little happy, and Kurenai stiffled a giggle. "Anyways, my name is Koga, member of the Kitsune clan. In case you're wondering, that's where Lady Kyushana leads."

"Nice. Name's Kiba Inuzuka," said Kiba.

"Arf," barked Akamaru.

"Hey, Akamaru," greeted back Koga, to everyone's surprise.

"You can understand Akamaru!?" shouted Kiba.

"Of course, I'm part canine."

"Interesting. Shino Aburame." said the stoic bug user.

"I don't have to give you my name," sneered Sakura.

"Fine, I'll just call you boy-girl thing," shrugged Koga, causing Sakura to screech. He noticed that the jonin was hesitant of talking. "And you?"

'Come on Kurenai, just introduced yourself. Despite his appearance, his is just a normal being like me, only stronger, taller, and cute- oh Kami!' "HELLO!" greeted Kurenai, only louder than she was hoping to speak. This threw off many of the people listening, surprise that Kurenai lost her cool. "MY NAME IS KURENAI YUUHI!"

"Um, hi. Thanks for the introduction. I was just walking by, so I'll be on my way," said Koga as he walked away, before waving goodbye to team 8. Kurenai waved furiously, before realizing what just happened.

'Oh Kami, did I just became a fangirl?!'

"Oh great, Kurenai-sensei is smitten with that fox," said Sakura. "Guess her standards means anyone who she'll spead her l-" She didn't get the chance to finish because Kurenai suddenly punched the girl to the face. The woman then proceeded to repeatedly punch the pink hair girl.

"Don't."

Thwack

"You."

Thwack

"Dare."

Thwack

"Finish."

Thwack

"That."

Thwack

"Sentence!" shouted Kurenai as she gave more vicious beatings to the harpy. At the sidelines, Kiba, Akamaru, and Shino were sitting on lawn chairs, wearing sunglasses, and drinking out of coconuts, enjoying the spectacle of their sensei beating up their teammate.

A/N: Yes, I gave Koga the denseness of Cannon Naruto's obliviousness to females. Though it won't be long until he figures out about Kurenai. As for her, I thought it'll be funny for her to lose her cool like that.