Has anyone ever told you guys that you're awesome? Probably, but I'll do it again anyway! YOU GUYS ARE SO AWESOME! I love you all! Seriously I can't believe all the amazing feedback I've been getting on this! It makes my heart soar! =D My iPod was being not as mystically psychic as it usually is today. I had in on shuffle while typing this and it kept playing All Time Low and Blink-182, who I love, but defiantly not appropriate angst writing music. On that note you might possibly choke on all the angst in this chapter. I was originally going to post this tomorrow, but then I remembered BONES season finale is on and I'm likely to spend the whole day geeking out about it! So here is chapter 4, were hopefully many questions will be answered! =D

Logan REALLY disliked talking about his past. Anything before the age of six was painful to recall. It was behind them, why couldn't everyone move on and forget about it? The trouble is that the past kept creeping in his mind, playing over and over again like some sick movie every time he let his guard down, even for a second. So that's why sitting on his bed, with Kendall staring at him waiting to hear a story that would change everything was Logan's worst nightmare.

"My parents," He said, voice shaking "my biological parents, they didn't want me. I still have no idea who they are. Why they did it." He closed his eyes for a moment to stop the wave of emotion, of worthlessness that consumed him. He wouldn't cry. He was stronger than that.

"I got put in the system. I don't really remember most of the homes, just flashes. I remember moving. That was always the hardest part. Getting up and leaving everything behind, having to start at a new school, make new friends and I was never outgoing so I kept to myself mostly. It was never something I got used to." Logan took a deep breath, trying to prepare himself for the crash.

He detached himself from his emotions, praying it would make this easier. If he couldn't feel anything than what was the worst that could happen? This is what he did. He blocked the pain. It was his only option. "But then about two months after I turned five I was sent to the-the Johnson's." The name was fire on his tongue, causing a hatred rise within him, and for a second he was relieved because he felt something other than pain. "Julie and Kyle Johnson. They were ok at first, not any different than any other homes I had been in, but then one day I was helping Kyle do the dishes, and he warned me that if I broke one I would get in trouble. I tried so hard, but the water was so hot and the soap was slippery and I was only five!" His breath caught in his throat and he had to mentally remind himself how to breath. When he continued, his voice was higher than normal "They locked me in the trunk of the car. For an entire day they just left me in there. I thought I was going to die."

Kendall couldn't stand to see Logan looking so helpless, clearly trying not to cry and breathing getting harder to manage, and he knew it was only going to get worse. He reached out and placed his hand on Logan's shoulder, wanting to comfort his friend, but at a loss how to. He didn't want to make the experience any worse than it already was and he wasn't sure what Logan needed. He felt like he was failing him.

Unexpectedly a dry sob broke through Logan's chest at the contact, but he didn't allow tears to fall."Sorry," Logan said when he was able to speak again, because Logan would be the one apologizing for showing a small sign of how much this was affecting him. "It's just hard to talk about."

"It's ok Logan. You don't have to apologize." Kendall said in what he hoped was a soothing voice, but it came out too squeaky. "Just take your time."

A minute of silence hung in the air as Logan composed himself to go on.

'Thanks." He said before taking one last deep breath. "I guess you could say it got worse from there. I would do little things wrong and Kyle would yell at me, hell, sometimes he would just yell for no reason at all. I couldn't understand why he was yelling. I hadn't even done anything! I just wanted it to stop." Another dry sob ripped through his chest on the last word, causing Kendall to wince. This couldn't have happened, not to someone like Logan, not when he was so young. "But he never stopped, and then I-I came home from school one day and he was standing there waiting for me when I opened the door."

He was so close to losing it, to breaking down and not caring if Kendall saw or not. It was his first time telling someone in ten years. How did he think he was going to react? He wanted to stay in check, be a stone and shut away the pain, but the more he struggled the harder it was becoming. But still was the though that he couldn't do so in front of Kendall. He wouldn't let his friend see how much it was really affecting him. He wouldn't make it any harder for him.

"We were watching the neighbors dog while they were out of town and I had accidentally left the back door open that morning and he got out. I didn't mean to! I tried to pull it all the way shut, but the door was heavy and I wasn't strong enough and I was to afraid to ask because I didn't want to get yelled out." Logan sniffed and Kendall felt his heart break.

He felt worthless that he could do nothing to comfort Logan who was literally falling to pieces before his eyes.. He wanted to make all the pain vanish and make it so Logan never had to experience hurt and abandonment again. Kendall protected his friends when they weren't strong enough to do it themselves. Now all he could do was sit and watch because he couldn't protect Logan from his past, and it made him feel sick.

"He said I had to learn my lesson. That I wouldn't ever learn if I didn't get punished." Kendall stared in horror as Logan squeezed his eyes together, trying to block the pain that was inevitable. "He took me down to the basement and told me to get on my knees and take my shirt off. He-he was rummaging in the closet and the next thing I know he was hitting me. I still don't know what it was, but it was long and felt like some sort of cable. And I was crying, begging him to stop! But he just kept saying I had to learn my lesson!" He looked at Kendall seeing the horror and pity, knowing his own eyes held everything he couldn't say out loud. How the blood had run down his back, staining the floor with bright red streaks. How he hadn't been able to move properly for days after. How he would still wake up sweating from nightmares, swearing he had just been crying out for him to just stop, because he was numb and couldn't even feel the blows anymore.

And from the way Kendall pulled him into a broke breaking hug, he knew he understood.

Poor Logie :( Hmmmm, I'm really not sure how I feel about this. It's not as epic as I would have liked it to be, but it is what is it. So what do you think? Love it? Hate it? Let me know! Reviews make my world go round! I'll try to update soon, hopefully by Saturday! LOVE YOU ALL!